Lord Tubbington: Private Eye
by Cactusgirl329
Summary: Brittany starts a private investigating business with the help of her girlfriend, Santana, and a very reluctant cat. Adventure, mayhem, romance, and hilarity ensue. Brittana. Glee. M.
1. The First Case

**It's been a really long time since I've written and shared…so enjoy!**

**I intend to write a few mysteries for them to solve so please stick with it. Also I have already rated this M because I know how I write and I can't help but write smut. Pssst- chapter 2 has smut! :D**

**-Obviously I own nothing.**

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><p>"Ladies!" A megaphone echoed to life within the gym. "If I wanted to waste my time and tease my upchuck reflux I would have followed the football team's example and thrown all of you into a spiral of shame by making you join the <em>glee<em> club for a week of dance routines, unheard of show tunes, and a cheesy theme of the week like _honesty_ or_ trust_ or _how losing can be fun if you have friends_! Instead I want winners and winners aren't whiners!"

Sue Sylvester glared over the brim of the megaphone taking a quick inventory of her championship squad. The slightest twitch of her lowering brow made the cheerleaders scramble. Every girl ducked her head faster than the previous girl as they took their place in formation. Sue couldn't stop herself as her upper lip curled with satisfaction. "Practice tomorrow morning at 7am. Don't be late. Make sure you bring your running sneakers."

She heard a few groans from deep in the ranks. Sue whipped around to face the group to see who dared to complain about the price of winning, but the noises had quickly evaporated. All the girls nodded enthusiastically as if running as the sun rose over the horizon was greatest way to spend their time. "Good. That's a much better attitude. Now get out of my sight before I decide that we should do a midnight scavenger hunt across Ohio again."

The girls quickly broke away from Sue's sight and headed for their bags, but Sue continued her train of thought out loud, "Poor Marybeth never did make it back to McKinley…maybe the next time I will have the girls look for wherever that girl decided to hide or if she died. If she was smart she would have left the state or remained still for the past four months. Never thought the girl had the chops to make it on this squad."

Sue didn't let the thought bother her for much longer. The smell of success lingered in the air. She walked towards the doors of the gym. Her fingers twitched in anticipation of her diary. Almost half way out of the gymnasium she spotted a football player talking to one of her cheerios. Not an unusual sight, but her eyes narrowed in on the energy drink in the boy's hand.

"Disgusting," She shook her head right before she slapped the can away from his face. The sugary and unhealthy drink flew from his lips and hit the wall with a small thud. Liquid spilled in a small pool. Instantly the boy straightened and looked past the girl he was trying to flirt with to see who had attacked his drink. Sue cocked only one eyebrow at him. Quickly the boy muttered an apology before he ran off.

It was going to be a good day.

Sue walked down the halls of McKinley High with the same smug smirk she always wore. Children moved briskly out of her path. The students knew that despite the head coach of the cheerleader's Cheshire cat smile that she could be set on a path of destruction at any moment. It was a known statistic that it was impossible to make it to the second half of sophomore year without experiencing a N.S.D.E. (Near Sylvester Death Experience). Even the teachers in the lounge made a habit to stay clear of the coach. Even more pleasing was the fact that the cleft-chinned Spanish teacher glee club adviser was nowhere in sight. Nothing ruined a cup of coffee like seeing the poster-boy for greasy unkempt manes of hair like Will Schuster. Her mood could not have been better. It was so good that Sue even restrained from asking that poor poor woman named Emily or Emaya or Emmylou or whatever her name was, if she knew the fastest way to the colonial reenactment council of Ohio dressed in her ridiculous blouse and skirt.

"See ya Amelia!" Sue barked as she left the lounge with her perfect coffee.

Upon arriving at her office, Sue confidently turned the knob of her office expecting all in her world to be perfect.

But as life would have it, Sue dropped her coffee. Its black contents spilled all over the floor in a growing pool of liquid. One word slipped from her lips.

"Horror!"

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><p>On any other day no one would have batted an eye at the knowledge that two of Sue Sylvester's top cheerleaders would be sitting in her office, but today was different. It had not been a good day at McKinley High School. Shortly after the first bell of the day, a guttural yell reverberated throughout the halls and shook the desks. The yell was immediately followed by the sound of thrown objects hitting walls.<p>

So students couldn't help but gawk as their eyes lingered to try and catch a glimpse of the meeting between Santana Lopez, Brittany Pierce, and Coach Sylvester.

Santana knew what it looked like. Or at least she could imagine what her peers were whispering about along the hallways and through texts under desks. They would be speculating as to what the two cheerleaders could have possibly done to have angered Sue this early in the morning.

But the truth was so far from any speculation that Santana would have been tempted to laugh if it wouldn't have risked Sue literally ripping her head from her shoulders. Her dark eyes roamed over the destroyed office, the smashed glass of her window, the chairs lopsided on the ground missing legs, and finally settled on the real reason Santana was sitting here in Sue's office – one, Brittany S. Pierce.

Again, Santana had to repress a smile, but it was much harder than before.

Only last week, Santana had driven Britt back to her house after a double header in the afternoon: Glee practice followed by Cheerios. All the two girls wanted to do was spend some time together and blow off some steam in the fantastical way ever. Mind blowing sex.

But Santana's mother had come home early from her afternoon brunch at the club and insisted on spending the entire day following around the household maid to make sure she was doing her job correctly. As a result, her mother and the maid continued to walk in and out of rooms including Santana's despite her loud and angry protests. They continued bicker and fight in both Spanish and English slamming doors and knocking over baskets of laundry.

"_Don't worry, San, we can get our cuddle on later. Sleep over my house tonight." _Brittany had whispered low behind her girlfriend's ear after the third time Santana's mother had burst into the room. The blonde's foot slid up and down Santana's leg for a few moments instantly calming the fiery Latina. "_Besides Scooby-Doo miniseries on right now!"_

Little did Santana know that allowing her girlfriend watch a few episodes of those meddling kids would wind her up in Sue's office.

"_I mean I understand that they are homeless and by solving mysteries they never have to get real jobs, have a house, or have any real talents, but why a dog? I mean Lord Tubbington could easily solve all these mysteries in a matter of minutes!"_

"_Britt, I'm pretty sure the only mystery Tubbs can solve is how much cheese he can eat before he slips into a coma."_

"_Santana! How many times do I have to tell you that he doesn't like to be called Tubbs!"_ Brittany lifted the cat and stroked its backside. "_Besides you know that he can hear you."_

"_Fine I won't call him Tubbs, but it still doesn't change the fact that the only thing he'd be good at is laying around hoping the bad guy trips on him."_

"_Not true! And I'll prove it! Lord Tubbington's the sneakiest and slyest cat around."_

"_Still not convinced." _Santana had purred into her girlfriend's ear and slid her body closer to the blonde. She had wanted to forget about the cat and try to get some sweet lady kisses in before Britt had to go home, but the blonde leaped from the bed. Ever since Santana had taught her how to turn on the computer, Brittany would occasionally dabble on Paint.

In a matter of minutes, Brittany had produced a piece of paper which ironically looked exactly like the one Sue was now slapping on her desk for both girls to see.

"So it's come to my attention that besides being lesbians, cheerleaders, glee clubbers, protecting sweet Porcelain from bullies, blogging online, being student council president, and constantly linked by your pinkies that you now run a private investigation mystery solving side hustle." Sue leaned back in her chair. Her eyes narrowed as she tapped her spread fingers together. "I admit that when I first saw this eye sore of an advertisement that I was tempted to take them all down as an effrontery to good tastes and my eyes. But you managed to strategically place them over all the sign-ups for glee club so I left them alone. And now I see that like always I did the right thing."

Santana risked one glance to the blonde sitting on the only other chair not broken in Sue's office. Brittany couldn't contain her excitement as Sue produced one of her many flyers. Her blue eyes met Santana's and an irrepressible smile which Santana felt compelled to return. Whatever made her girlfriend happy.

"So what coach? Obviously they haven't bothered you before. Why did you need to call us in here? They're hardly harming anyone."

Santana looked back at the poster. After winning her presidential campaign on the premise of unicorns, topless days, and candy, Britt had really taken to colors.

LORD TUBBINGTON'S PRIVATE EYE

WILL SOLVE ANY MYSTERY

CONTACT BRITTANY S. PIERCE

NO MYSTERY TOO SMALL OR TOO LARGE OR TOO MEDIUM

After the initial one on the computer, Brittany ran out of colored ink in her printer from trying to print out all the coupons she could to Breadsticks. Britt had been working on a birthday present for Santana for a million dates to Breadsticks, but she couldn't tell her girlfriend why she no longer had any ink. So she convinced Santana to help her color in the posters. They had gone through a 64-pack of crayons by the end of the night before Brittany was convinced they had enough posters for the school.

This particular poster had Lord Tubbington riding a unicorn through the middle of the print with a magnifying glass and a Sherlock Holmes hat. Obviously it had been one of the ones Brittany had drawn.

"You misunderstand me, Lopez. I have no problem with your little side venture. In fact, I wish to hire you and Pierce's services."

"And Lord Tubbington?" Brittany finally spoke up. Her eyes sparkling.

"I was going to ask about the name. Who's Lord Tubbington?"

"Brittany's private pussy detector." Santana said with a confident smirk and even shot a wink towards her coach. "I mean detective."

"Lopez!"

"See I told you no one would know what we were talking about if I called it that!" Brittany gave a look to which Santana rolled her eyes and shrugged. "Lord Tubbington is only the greatest cat and he happens to be a master at crimes and mysteries."

Brittany leaned forward before continuing in a hushed voice, "He's a rehabilitated criminal and he's earning my trust by giving back to the community and my constituents. I can't have Lord Tubbington's past crimes reflect poorly on me to my voters."

"I see." Sylvester leaned back and made eye contact with Santana. The brunette only shrugged and smiled behind Brittany's back. "Well in that case I would like to tell you my case and you can decide if you and your feline are up to the challenge."

Britt nodded and pulled out a notepad and pencil already furiously scribbling notes.

"All you need to know is that my 1989 Ohio championship trophy is missing. It was here yesterday and now it's not. And one of your glee friends did it." Sue's voice had picked up intensity and fury until she stood towering and pointing her finger towards the choir room. Slowly she lowered her finger and sat back down. "You need to find the culprit and my trophy. And I will pay you."

"Life supply of Lucky Charms!" Brittany blurted out before Santana could even open her mouth. "And we will need a key to get into the locker rooms."

"Britt…" Santana whispered trying to get the blonde's attention.

"The key we will need right away in order to conduct investigations while no students are around, but we get to keep it even after the case. Sometimes I get lost and the janitor locks me in. The charms you can give to us after we've completed the job." Brittany finished with a satisfied smile.

After a few moments, Sue reached into her desk and withdrew a small ring of keys and handed them to Brittany. "You drive a hard bargain, Pierce. But I expect results. Figgins wouldn't let me handle it my way. Apparently corporeal punishment is considered assault in the public school system now. So you, your cat, and Lopez are my only other option."

"We won't let you down!" Brittany stood up took the keys and shook hands with the great Coach Sylvester.

The two cheerleaders left Sue's office without speaking but once they were in the hall, Santana grabbed Brittany's hand and dragged her around the corner. No one was around since everyone was already in class and Sue had called their teacher to excuse the two girls for their special meeting.

"Britt, you can't be serious. This is the great dragon we are talking about. If we mess this up we'll be hauling every cheerio's fat ass on the bottom of the pyramid."

"San, I don't know why you're so worried. We can do this! Besides Lord Tubbington steals my stuff all time. He'll know where all the best hiding places are."

"B, you know I love you, but LT doesn't hide much at McKinley. Normally he stuffs things under your bed or behind the sofa."

"You don't think we can do it? You think Scooby-Doo is better than Lord Tubbington." Brittany dropped her voice. Disappointment filled her eyes and she pulled her hand out from Santana's grasp.

Santana only smiled and shook her head before she reached for Brittany's face. Cupping her chin, Santana raised herself on her toes to kiss Brittany lightly on the lips. "If anyone can find Sue's trophy, it's definitely you. And if you don't mind, I'd like to help."

Brittany's mood instantly reversed at the feel of her girlfriend's soft lush lips brushing against hers. "Of course you're helping! Lord Tubbington loves when you come along!"

"He doesn't."

"He does!"

"Fine, we're not arguing over your cat's feelings even if he's always staring at me."

"You're the best, San." Brittany this time returned the kiss leaning down into her girlfriend. Her body shifted against Santana's as she slid the smaller brunette up against the lockers. Santana let out a soft moan as she felt the back of her head hit the metal. He body arched up into Brittany till their hips rubbed together. Long slender fingers slid up Santana's tan skin till they ran through her hair and their kiss lengthened.

"Ladies!" The two teenagers jerked away from each other. "This is not the way to find my trophy! Get back to class before I give you two an extra practice this afternoon!"

"Yes, Coach Sylvester." They both said at the same time. They looked at each other and started to giggle as they linked pinkies before walking towards their class.


	2. Catnips

**Very excited to start getting into the story. Now that I know what the chapters look like and read in length I will try to plan for longer segments. Thanks for reading! :D**

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><p>Late that afternoon the two cheerleaders walked into the choir room. Brittany instantly went to the far side of the room. Santana couldn't contain the slight smirk that crossed her lips as she watched her girlfriend bending over in all the corners of the room. At one point Britt even crawled underneath the piano.<p>

"Santana, you know I normally don't ask what your girl, Brittany, is doing, but really, what is she doing?" Mercedes asked watching the blonde crawling underneath a line of chairs in the back row like a snake.

"Being Brittany. Just let her do her thing." Santana shrugged. She took her seat in the back. It wasn't hard to deduce what Brittany was doing. The blonde's actions all resembled something from a cartoon and Santana was positive that Britt was literally searching for clues to the case. And as much as Santana loved watching Britt acting adorable and spending time with Tubbs, she had a feeling that this "case" would cut into some serious sex time with her girlfriend. Santana had every intention to break the case as soon as possible. The plan was simple. Let Brittany do her thing and support her, but at the same time track down the only real possible culprit of the crime.

Puck.

What idiot in the glee club would steal one of Sue's trophies? Easy. The only idiot who didn't realize that stealing from Sue Sylvester would mean death.

"I heard football practice would be going late today." Kurt said next making casual conversation. "So it's just gonna be us girls for the day."

"Oh diva off? I am so ready for a little me time. Maybe Rachel won't come if she can watch Finn practicing outside on the field." Mercedes responded.

Great. No Puck at glee practice today. Santana rolled her eyes. She would have to find him either after practice or tomorrow.

"Don't worry! I have arrived and I have been talking extensively to Mr. Schuster about what we should do about the great vandalism which took place early today." Rachel Berry strode into the room. Will followed her with that look which screamed theme-of-the-week-would-directly-effect-all-songs-from-glee-club-and-hopefully-correct-some-inappropriate-behavior-some-or-all-of-the-members-have-been-engaged-in. Again Santana rolled her eyes.

"Please Rachel, I will handle this." Will's voice overrode even Rachel's loud mouth. He pointed for Rachel to take a seat which she did reluctantly next to a very quiet Quinn. "This morning I entered the choir room and I found our only trophy case broken. It looks as though someone must have smashed it and ran. Nothing was taken, but these types of attacks against our club have to stop."

He continued. "Now I know some of you have friends in other circles." This time he looked directly at Santana although if Puck, Finn, and the rest of the football players were present then he would have probably glanced to them as well. "So if you know anything or the reason why someone would break the case, please come see me."

Everyone's eyes drifted towards the case against the wall. It contained the Regional's trophies and Sectionals that the glee club had won the past few years. The trophies still stood there, but the kids now noticed that a plastic sheet had been hung over the opening. A makeshift cover so no one would cut themselves on the glass before it could be repaired.

"Anyone know anything?" Will asked once more. Rachel made a point to turn completely around in her chair and look directly at the Latina in the back row.

"Oh please, hobbit, you've got to be kidding. Why would I do that? Besides we all know that one trophy is missing from the case and has been since last year when you got your mack on with Finn at states. As for this," Santana paused and stopped filing her nails for a moment to glance to the case. "Why would I do that? Seems dumb. I would have at least stolen something."

"Santana has a point. Why would any of us know who or why?" Mercedes jumped in.

"I know what happened!" A bright and exceptionally loud voice yelled from the far corner of the room. A very dusty and lint covered Brittany emerged from behind a collection of old maps no teacher could possibly use anymore. As the maps still called Russia the U.S.S.R and North America just had the words "New World" written across it. Neither made much sense to be on the same map.

Santana narrowed her eyes unsure what Brittany was talking about. They did everything together and she certainly would have remembered destroying the New Directions trophy case.

"Brittany, you know what happened?" Mr. Schuster asked in disbelief.

"Well no, not yet, but I know that this case has to do with my other case. They have to be connected because whenever two cases appear in the same episode of any crime or mystery TV show that means they are always connected!" Brittany skipped down a few stairs until she was standing in front of the choir. Small balls of dust bunnies and shredded paper hung around her cheerios uniform and her ponytail hung awkwardly to one side of her head. "Everyone knows this. It's common knowledge!"

"Britt," Santana moaned in the back row and shook her head. Not good. Not good at all. She knew this private investigator thing would cut into their time and now they would have twice the amount of time spent on solving mysteries for these idiots.

"Santana, I don't understand. You speak unicorn. What is our dear Brittany trying to say?" Kurt turned to look up at the brunette.

If it made Brittany happy…

"What she means is that we will find out who broke the case. I am sure that you've seen the postings for Lord Tubbington's Private Eye Investigator." Santana looked up to see Brittany beaming with excitement. "So consider us on the job."

Brittany jumped for joy. Santana always knew the right thing to say. She ran up through the chairs to her girl and pecked her on the cheek. "Thanks, San. You're the best. I can't wait to tell Lord Tubbington that we got two cases in one day!"

Santana grumbled in response, but smiled inwardly. Her eyes were drawn down to Rachel's mouth in a perfect 'o' of disbelief that Santana would help the glee club or how quickly she had volunteered to find the culprit. Even if she loved Brittany and would do anything for her, it did not mean that she had to put up with the rest of the losers looking at her like she was crazy.

"Turn around, Berry."

"Well thank you, Brittany and Santana, for volunteering to solve this mystery." Will spoke and went to the white board.

"Um, Mr. Schue, we run a legit investigating business we aren't doing this for bones." Brittany had spoken again.

"What she means is this isn't pro bono, Mr. Schue. We expect compensation." Santana cocked a perfectly arched eyebrow at him.

"Now girls, you know that the glee club already struggles to raise mon-"

"You give Santana a solo in our next competition and I get to make and teach all the choreography. Yours sucks. Offense."

Santana glanced sideways to her girlfriend. Who would ever think that the blonde bombshell was dumb? They would be crazy. Britt always knew what to do and what to say.

"I believe you mean 'no offense', Brittany." Rachel chimed in. "And I don't think that we should be giving solos away like candy or without consulting me, the glee club captain!"

"Watch it, Berry." Santana growled. Her hands twirled the nail file menacingly towards the short singer.

"No, I mean offense. Have you ever seen our dance moves? Or really half of glee dance? It's sad. So sad." Brittany cut in while gently placing a hand over Santana's so the Latina wouldn't be able to lunge at Rachel with the nail file.

"We do need to find out who did this so we can stop it from happening again and Figgins has already said that he can't do much more than ask around so…"

"You can't, Mr. Schue!" Rachel tried to interject.

"If you two can solve this mystery and get back to us within the next two weeks with a culprit then I will agree to both your terms. Santana is one of our strongest vocalists and you, Brittany have always been able to pull out some of the best chorography at the last minute. It would be nice to see what you could do given time and the ability to work with some of our more challenged members." The whole group glanced to Rachel and everyone muttered 'Finn' under their breath. "What this means is that we have a new theme of the week!"

Everyone groaned.

"I just don't know it yet. But we can all help Santana and Brittany."

"And Lord Tubbington! Don't forget him!"

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><p>The next day at school, Santana found herself without her girlfriend. Brittany had been vague on the phone that morning and said that she would run to cheerios practice in the morning and that Santana didn't need to worry about picking her up for school. Santana hadn't thought anything out of the ordinary at the time, but now at third period she still hadn't seen the blonde since they separated for class. A few times San had thought she'd seen a blonde ponytail in a cheerios outfit prancing around the corner, but it had been impossible to see if it was indeed Brittany.<p>

Despite not knowing the location of Britt, Santana had another mission. It gave her the perfect opportunity to solve the first mystery. She opened her locker and took a quick inventory. Cheerios outfit. Perfect ponytail. Makeup. Sexy – as always. It didn't matter that the whole school knew about her and Britt, she knew that she could still turn heads. Most guys thought it was hot and none thought it was hotter that she was dating another girl than Noah Puckerman. She closed her locker and glanced down the hallway. Puck stood by his own locker combing that ridiculously overgrown mohawk on his head. To think at one time she had found it attractive.

"Listen, Puck, I'm only going to say this once." Santana strolled up to the locker and slammed his door shut so he would have to look at her. Puck only leaned against the wall with a look that said 'I am so turned on right now.'

"What can I do for you pretty lady? Ready to come back to the Puckster for some loving? Or maybe you and Britt-"

"Shut it. Afores I endz you." Her voice was curt and Santana cut him off with a look of disgust before she jabbed one of her fingers in the middle of his chest.

"Alright then…what do I owe the lack of pleasure?" He said and rubbed the place where her finger had viciously poked him.

"I want to know where you put it. And do _not _make me tell you what it is because we both know you are the only person in this school stupid enough to take it."

"Um…don't hurt me, but I have no idea what 'it' is."

"Seriously, Puck, if you just give it to me. I will say that Britt's stupid cat found it in the locker room and that will be the end of it. Sylvester won't even have to water board you or whatever form of torture she prefers this week. I just want this over with."

"Santana, you know you scare me. And while I normally don't let anyone know I am pretty sure you could kick my ass in about two minutes flat. So I really have no idea what you're talking about."

Normally Santana would have been happy for the compliment, but now she was just annoyed that her fast track out of this mess was going nowhere fast. She jabbed her finger harder into Puck's chest. "If I find out that you are-"

"Hey, San!" Brittany skipped up the hall and stopped to stand next to the brunette. She was also wearing her cheerios outfit and a ponytail. Santana didn't recognize her girlfriend's bag, but it did have ducks all over the print. She assumed that this one was actually Brittany's backpack. A few times every year, Santana would have to track down some underclassman to recover one of Britt's bags. The blonde hadn't yet grasped the concept of capitalism and insisted that trading a bag of her class books in exchange for a bag of skittles was a fair trade.

The second Britt recognized Puck she turned to him excitedly. "Puck! Good thing you're here! I was going to go look for you!"

"Seems like Puck sauce is real popular with the ladies today." Puck winked.

"Is that like duck sauce? Cause I tried to feed it to my duck once when my parents let me keep it in my room and Herbert didn't like it. False advertisement." Britt asked sincerely.

"Not exactly, Brittany, but Puck sauce has been known to be irresistible to most women."

"I'll have to try some!"

"As if." Santana broke into the conversation and shot Puck a glare accompanied by a harder push of her finger into his chest.

"Well since I'm here I was wondering if you could answer some questions about the missing trophy and the broken trophy case." Brittany pulled up the notepad she had been scribbling on since the meeting in Sue's office. "Where were you on the night of…two nights ago?"

"Umm home?"

"Please I know you've been seeing that sophomore slut from the cheerios. I know how you work. It was a Monday night don't tell me you were just home." Santana snipped.

"If you have to know I was at the Robinson's house. I've been cleaning their pool about twice a week now for free."

"Gross."

"That's so nice. I didn't know how big you were into charity." Brittany said over San's singular word of disgust. "On TV, the bad guy is always a gardener, butler, scientist, owner, or the pool boy. So I just want you to know that you are on my lists of suspects until I can prove you guilty then you'll be on my list of culprits."

Santana was only half listening to Brittany talk about how the lists worked and why Puck would never be crossed off them because the Latina was too busy checking out her girlfriend's bag. "Hold up. Did your bag just move, Britt Britt?" But the blonde was too busy to hear Santana. One of the printed ducks bulged and then shifted back down before another one bulged from a different place. "B, what do you have in your bag?"

"Shush, don't worry about it, San." Brittany looked at her with big eyes before turning back to Puck.

Oh hell no! Brittany just shushed her and then gave her the look that said whatever was in the bag was definitely bad news. Santana had seen that look so many times before. The result always spelled out trouble for the duo. The backpack continued to bulge more violently. Dark eyes drifted towards the back of Britt's head. She needed to at least know what was inside it.

Slowly she reached up to the zipper at the top of the bag and took a deep breath. It was probably just a chipmunk or some small creature that Brittany found on the way to school this morning. Or it could be a garden gnome and Britt had planned to reunite it with Rachel – a long lost relative or something. She had only opened it a few inches when she heard a low deep hiiiisssssssss.

"No!" Brittany screamed, but it was too late. A dark large object leapt from the confines of the bag straight towards the dark-haired beauty. Santana barely had any time to raise her right arm before the animal took a swipe.

"Shit!" Santana screamed and grasped her arm tightly. She could feel dark warm blood running down and beneath her fingers.

Lord Tubbington had already curled into a ball and looked like he was taking a nap. "You little monster! I know you are not sleeping right now after you maimed me!" Santana made a move to lunge at the cat. Puck grabbed her just in time and held her in the air while she kicked and tried to claw her way towards the cat.

"Aww, San, why'd you have to scare him like that? I was keeping him in there so he could sniff out clues and hear my interrogations!" Brittany bent down and picked the incredibly large cat off the ground. "You okay, Lord Tubbington?"

"Me? Scare him? He just attacked me!" Santana was screaming. "Put me down, Puck!"

"Nope. I think you need to see the nurse. You're bleeding all over my cleanest shirt." Puck spoke while half dragging and half carrying Santana towards the nurse's office at the far end of the hallway.

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><p>"You're lucky you don't need stitches. I'm surprised they still haven't figured out how these wild raccoons keep getting into the lockers. But you're a tough cookie. I need to call your parents to find out if they want you to go to the hospital anyway before I send you back to class. Okay, honey?" The nurse asked gently. "It should only take a few minutes."<p>

"Whatever."

The nurse had been nice enough, but Santana was in a foul mood after being attacked by her girlfriend's pussy. Not the pussy she wanted and it definitely hadn't been in a good way. At the mention of her parents, Santana's mood worsened. She muttered under her breath. "Good luck getting in touch with them, lady."

She looked down at the bandages wrapped around her arm. The stupid cat had gotten her pretty deep. What had Brittany been thinking anyway? And defending LT instead of making sure her girlfriend was okay? Santana couldn't help but fume as she sat on the small cot in the nurse's office. A curtain had been drawn around her bed to prevent anyone from interrupting the nurse as she had wrapped and cleaned the wound. But apparently when the nurse went so did all of Santana's privacy. A tall silhouette moved outside of the curtain and Santana let out a small sigh as she instantly recognized the form. She would recognize it anywhere.

"Are you just going to shuffle out there or are you going to come and see if I still have an arm?"

"Hey, San, I didn't know if you'd want to see me." Brittany popped her head between the sheets of the curtains. "I really like that arm so I hope you still have it."

Santana rolled her eyes and smiled slowly before she raised her arm so Brittany could see she was still intact. "All there. No thanks to Tubbs."

"I'm sorry, S! I didn't know that he wouldn't like my bag. He's always hiding in things so I figured he wouldn't mind." Britt kept her head down. Her mouth twisted with an apology almost like a small child who felt guilty about breaking something.

"B, why are standing out there? Just come in here and I am sure I can think of some way for you to make it up to me."

"I was hoping you'd say that because I already thought of a way." Brittany's eyes went from puppy dog to seduction in about two seconds. Her blue eyes sparkled and Santana instantly forgot why she was pretending to be mad at her girlfriend. When Britt turned it on, she turned it on hard.

Britt pushed back the curtain and Santana's mouth dropped. "Shit."

Standing in front of Santana, Brittany wore the candy stripped nurse outfit which the brunette kept in her cheerios locker room as a secret. She hadn't even thought of it since she had kissed Finn at the kissing booth sometime last year. It wasn't often that she needed to dress like that. Britt didn't quite fill out the top like Santana did, but what the small skirt did was draw attention to the blonde's impossibly long legs. Britt had taken out her ponytail and wore her hair framing her face underneath the small fake Red Cross hat.

Santana made a move to stand, but Britt closed the curtain behind her and crossed the distance between them in one smooth move.

"Britt," Santana moaned low and hard as the blonde pushed her body up against her. She was trapped with her back to the wall and her girlfriend grinding in front. "The nurse said she'd be back."

Brittany smirked and shook her head. She placed one long slender finger up against Santana's pursed lips. "Shhh, don't worry about it. I made sure no one will get in here till we're ready. Now tell your nurse where it hurts."

Santana didn't have time to respond. Britt brushed her lips down into Santana's letting the plush lips drag with only the slightest of touches. That's all it took for Santana to let out a rugged sigh at the contact. Britt took the noise as encouragement and bit San's bottom lip gently and dragged it down for a hot second before crashing their lips together. Santana's hands wrapped around her girlfriend's neck and slid through her hair knocking off the ridiculous hat. B already had moved her hands down the front of Santana's cheerios outfit to her waist and lifted her off the ground a few inches to pin her against the wall. It didn't matter how long they had fooled around with each other in those skirts, they had yet to lose their sexiness.

San pushed on leg up over Brittany's hip as her lips dragged south to the blonde's exposed neck and collarbone. Soft kisses trailed over her light skin and small nips drew hitches in her girlfriend's breathing. Britt's hands had already worked down between the small strips of material that hung around the cheerio's outfit like a skirt. She easily pushed them to the side and slid her hand right between Santana's spread legs. "Mhmm." Was the only word the brunette could get out. Brittany rubbed the outside of the red material imaging how wet Santana was underneath.

"Don't tease. Come on, baby, we don't have a lot of time."

Britt slipped a finger underneath the folds of the material and stroked her skin running her fingernails along the inside of her thighs. Santana's grip tightened around Brittany's back and scratched at the back of the nurse outfit trying to gain leverage so she could try to rub herself on Brittany's exploring hands. The blonde's other hand rose now trailing along the dark beauty's skin unable to help herself as her fingers dipped beneath her top. Her nails dragged over Santana's abs up towards her bra where she cupped her tit not yet slipping underneath the material.

"_Britt…_" The Latina whimpered against Brittany's neck.

She was answered by a flinger slipping up between the folds of her pussy and rubbed along the increasing wetness between her legs.

"You're so wet, S."

Santana gasped louder this time and bit her bottom lip. "_More. Please nurse I don't know how much longer I can last._" Her words rolled from her sweet tongue right against Britt's ear. It set the girl off. She dipped her fingers into her girlfriend. Santana let out a much loader noise this time and ripped her head back to make unbelievable fuck-me-eyes with Brittany. Her dark eyes met with crystal blue. For an instant they kept still except for their breathing hot and heavy. Everything intensified the feel of Brittany's finger wet and encased in the gorgeous woman. She made the slightest movement and Santana's head shot back against the wall. The blonde began to stroke her fingers in and out at a hard fast pace. Santana's eyes closed in intense rapture up towards the ceiling.

Brittany increased her movement and eventually slipped a second finger between her legs. She loved the sounds Santana made when she couldn't control how fucked she felt when their bodies were flushed against each other. Now she worked her dancer's hips in time with every thrust of her fingers and every buck San made till they were bumping and grinding up against the cold concrete wall of the nurse's office. Santana could barely stop herself from screaming and her hands clawed up and down Brittany's back. One of the nurse's trays which held some soiled bloodied rags from cleaning her hand got knocked over and clattered to the ground, but she didn't notice. All she felt were Britt's fingers and her unreal body grinding in and out of her.

The door began to rattle outside of the curtain and the two girls could hear the nurse outside pounding on the window. Santana's eyes connected with Brittany's again. Another jolt of electricity shot between them. Her voice was sultry and direct. "Keep going."

"Why is this locked? Can you hear me? Let me in. I'll have to get the janitor." The nurse's shoes could be heard walking away, but the girls could care less. At that moment Santana braced herself as bit hard into the blonde's shoulder to stop herself from screaming at the orgasm that rocked her body. Waves of pleasure rolled over and over again and her girlfriend kept her fingers there loving the feel of her orgasm while inside of Santana.

"Shit. Shit. Shit." Santana whispered breathlessly against Brittany's shoulder. They both stayed still for a few moments. It allowed them a minute to recover. Eventually Santana lowered her leg from around the blonde's hips and loved the ached it produced when she finally put her legs back together. God, she could stay with her legs spread for Britt forever.

"So does this mean you forgive me and Lord Tubbington?" Her voice was all honey.

"You maybe. Tubbs has a lot to make up for."

"Here, let me kiss it." Brittany reached down and raised Santana's arm gently. Her lips pressed soft butterfly kisses all around the bandage without breaking eye contact. "All better?"

"Yeah." She couldn't contain a glowing smile.

The door outside the curtain started to rattle again. "I wish I could remember which key it was." They heard voices beyond.

"You have such sex hair." Santana giggled as she ran her fingers through Britt's hair.

"Well your uniform isn't even covering all the parts of you that I call mine." The taller girl raised her brows and looked Santana up and down. Her shirt was practically off and her skirt was so skewed that it could have been mistaken for a thong if those strips of cloth were hanging haphazardly around the tanned skin beauty's waist. Santana looked down and continued to laugh. She quickly pulled her shirt down and straightened herself out. Britt also pulled up the very revealing blouse of the nurse outfit not that it helped to cover anything.

The door opened and the nurse immediately ripped opened the curtain to check on her patient. Instead she found Santana in an unusually happy mood and a good coloring to her cheeks. The second thing she noticed was an oddly dressed blonde sitting next to the bed and holding her hand.

"Didn't you hear me calling?" The nurse asked with suspicious eyes unsure what to think about the scene.

"Oh I'm sorry were you trying to get in? My friend came to visit me. She volunteers at the children's hospital and when she heard about my accident, she came to visit right away." Santana's eyes sparkled.

"I like to give out treats." Brittany nodded enthusiastically.

"More like tricks in that outfit, B." San couldn't help herself as she muttered to her girlfriend.

The nurse looked back and forth between the two girls.

Santana continued. "I'm sure you couldn't get a hold of either of my parents which isn't a big deal. My father's a doctor anyway so I am sure when he gets around to it, he'll check me out. Prob send me to a plastic surgeon just to make sure that I won't be permanently scarred from this incident. And if I'm raving mad and foaming at the mouth in the next few days then we'll know that raccoon had rabies."

"What raccoon-"

Santana silenced Brittany. "So if you don't mind I will just head back to class. And be sure to tell Figgins to be thankful I don't feel like a lawsuit today."

"Come on, Britt Britt. We're out." Santana got up still holding to the other girl's hand.

"Where are we going?"

"As much as I love that outfit, you are going to have to change into something that won't have every boy falling over as you walk through the halls. Besides," Santana winked. "We have not one, but two cases to solve."


	3. Catching Up

**Sorry it took so long! I was at the beach enjoying a beautiful spring break. :D Thanks for reading and I appreciate feedback of any kind!**

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><p>"B, can I ask you something?" Santana leaned across her desk lazily so she wouldn't draw attention from their history teacher.<p>

"Sure, S." Britt smiled. They had snuck back into the girl's locker room after the nurse's office with the key Britt had managed to get from Sylvester. Now she had her pony holding her long blonde locks back and Santana had only the images of her cleavage from the nurse's outfit left from their afternoon tryst. Britt had exchanged the nurse's uniform for the cheerios' uniform. And while Santana appreciated her girl's ass in the red and white of McKinley, there was something about that nurse outfit that made her tingle in all the right places thinking about it.

"Where did you put LT? He's not back in your bag is he?" Dark eyes shifted warily down to the floor where the ducks played in still frame on the print. Instinctively her hand brushed against the bandage on her arm. Now that she wasn't distracted by the blonde's hand up her skirt, Santana felt every small movement because as the scratches hurt like a bitch.

"Oh don't worry, San. He's on a recon mission. All secret secret and disguised…like a rock. No one will even notice him."

"Not in another bag?" Santana risked a quick glance to her right.

"No, silly, how could he work from inside a bag? Besides we don't want a repeat of your arm."

"Brittany! Quiet! I don't know how many times I have to tell you that this it's a private chat time for you and Miss Lopez. Can you at least tell me what I have spent the past twenty minutes lecturing about?" Their teacher Mrs. Keely looked at her expectantly. Her chipped fingernails tapped on her desk while since held Brittany's gaze.

"That's easy. History." Britt answered with a shrug. A few snickers started around the classroom. At the sound of her classmates laughing, she turned to Santana with confusion all over her face. "Right? I mean this is History class? You even wrote it on my hand so I wouldn't forget."

"Enough!" Mrs. Keely snapped at the class which was now blatantly laughing out loud. "You two report to the principal's office. I won't and cannot tolerate having you disrupt our class every day with your antics, Miss Pierce, and you go with her Miss Lopez."

"But this is history right? Right?"

"Of course it is, Brit." Santana reassured her girlfriend while popping an unusually large bubble from her gum.

"Maybe you're in the wrong class, Mrs. Keely." Britt continued as she stood with Santana and shouldered her duck backpack while shaking her head. "Maybe you should write her schedule on her hand too, San? She seems confused."

"Whatever, B. She's not worth it. Besides Sue will get us out of detention. Cheerios practice and finding her trophy. We won't be there for long."

"Oh! Wait! We're going to the principal's office?" The blonde paused for a moment before catching up with the brunette.

"Of course we are. We're sent there like every other day. You okay? Are you sure you weren't attacked by LT? Maybe he jumped on your head or something?"

"No of course not! He knows that he can only jump on Puck's head and that's only because his head does look like a squirrel. And Lord Tubbington says that's fair game. I had to agree because I've been confused by it a few times." Brittany smiled. Santana knew that LT hadn't jumped on Britt's head, but she did silently watch her girlfriend trying to jump on Puck's head a once or twice during glee. Sometimes she would catch the blonde reaching out to pet Puck's head while they were singing songs. And of course the one time Santana had overheard Brittany asking what type of conditioner that Puck used to make it look so furry. Apparently Britt thought Aussie since it seemed like the only product that was animal friendly and approved. Something about the kangaroo wouldn't place its baby pouch in danger with unsafe hair products. Santana never felt the need to confront Britt about it.

At the principal's office, the receptionist told them to take a seat because Principal Figgins was currently engaged. They sat next to each other in the small waiting area between the receptionist desk and Figgins' clear glass windows. He was currently sitting at his desk with his head tilted back and appeared to be taking a nap. Busy her ass. Santana cocked an eyebrow at the resting head of the principal.

"It's amazing the amount of time, money, and energy this school pays for incompetence in all departments."

"He's just meditating or something, San."

"Yeah sure."

"Wanna go over the case notes with me?"

"Fine. I've got nothing. I tried to find out if it was Puck and he acted more clueless than he usually does. So as much as I hate to say this, I don't think Puck took the trophy. I didn't even bother to ask about the glass case since he would have stolen the trophies or something stupid."

"Same. Totally agree. Besides, I had Lord Tubbington listen to my interrogation before you released him from my bag. He agreed that it couldn't be Puck based on his observations."

Santana's eyes narrowed at the mention of the cat. Despite forgiving Brittany for the attack, she wasn't even close to forgiving the fur ball.

Brittany continued talking while flipping through her notebook. "I haven't yet ruled out the possibility that Coach Sylvester stole the trophy herself to frame the glee club. Or that gremlins snuck into the choir room to destroy the glass case. In fact, I have filled up the entire notebook with who could have committed the crimes and haven't crossed out any possibilities. So far my biggest hunches are magic so I am thinking that those kids that started the Harry Potter fan club three weeks ago could have done it. Those wands they wave around are dangerous! And my other hunch is that it's the butler." Brittany's eyes narrowed at the word and she quickly drew in her notebook again. "I just haven't found him yet. But I'm sure the school has a butler somewhere."

"Obviously we aren't looking in the right places." Santana sighed with exasperation. Why couldn't they just get through this first case in thirty minutes like it took on TV. Besides whenever Britt wanted to watch cartoons it meant that she liked to roleplay later, but this was so long. Who would ever want to be a detective in real life? Dumb. Mentally she crossed off the profession on the list of possibilities after graduation. "Maybe we should just tell Su-"

Santana stopped talking as her eyes whipped towards Figgins office again. She cocked her head to the side not believing what she was seeing at that moment. An incredibly large feline, the one which Brittany loved almost as much as she loved Santana, was lazily stalking across the top of the bookshelves in Figgins office. The cat's eyes were focused on something at the far end of the room that looked like Figgins personal collection of fish. The same fish which also happened to be the only animals allowed in the school. They served as Figgins backup mascots for school events when the school couldn't get anyone to put on the mascot outfit that had been mildewing in storage for the past 27 years.

"Britt Britt," Santana said never taking her eyes off the cat. "Where did you say LT was doing that secret secret mission?"

"San, you know I can't tell you that because it would totally blow his cover. Then he would like James Bond but without the hot girls and the cool gadgets – like a regular spy. Gross. That would totally cramp his style." Brittany paused for a moment. "I don't even know if there are any regular spies. Like what do they do?"

Santana resisted the urge to turn around at that moment and kiss her girlfriend. She told herself that she could just wait to kiss her for being cute later. At the moment she had to concentrate on sleeping Figgins, the fish, and LT pretending he was Simba from the Lion King about to pounce on some unsuspecting Zazu. "B, I hate to break it to you, but LT does not look like a rock right now and he's definitely about to blow his own cover. Did you put him in Figgins office?"

Brittany's eyes snapped up and frantically looked into the office. The blue orbs didn't catch Lord Tubbington's stroll along the top of the shelving, but immediately when to the fake plant in the corner. Her mouth opened in disbelief. "When Puck took you to the nurse's office, I snuck in here during the confusion because Lord Tubbington assured me that he could do his best work from Figgins office. I told him not to move! I even put him behind the tree as a special hiding spot! That way he'd literally be undercover."

"If we don't grab LT right now then he's going to be gobbling down the schools back-up mascots and I don't think even Sue will be able to take us out of detention. Check the secretary. Make sure she's occupied." Santana nodded towards the door. Brittany didn't even bother to wait for more instructions as she went through the first set of glass doors. The brunette quickly propelled herself towards the other glass door which led to Figgins' office. She said a thank you under her breath as she rattled the door and it wasn't locked. A strong musky smell hit her nose first. Santana scrunched her face at the offensive smell. Was this really what Figgins did? Marinate it bad colon all afternoon? It was bad and yet held a strange funky fruity after smell at the same time. She waved her hands in front of her face to try and clear the air before she took another step forward.

"Come here, Tubbers." Santana tried to make that noise with her mouth that she always heard people doing when talking to cats. When that didn't work, she reverted to the way she normally talked to Lord Tubbington when Brittany was out of hearing distance. "Get your fat ass down here right now. We still have a score to settle."

The feline didn't seem to either hear or care that Santana was trying to get his attention. Lord Tubbington continued to walk towards the fish in the bowl with the full intent to have a light meal before returning home with the blonde. Dark eyes glanced backwards to see that her girlfriend was still occupying the secretary with chatter. Why hadn't they planned this better? Obviously the cat would never listen to Santana. LT barely acknowledged her existence with the minor exception of this afternoon when the cat had attacked her.

"Get down!" Santana whispered in a louder and angry voice. She lunged behind the desk at the cat towards the shelving in the hopes that her sudden movements would scare the cat into breaking away his chosen path. But Lord Tubbington didn't blink.

"Shit. Britt's gonna kill me." Santana sighed and looked back her girlfriend still engaging the secretary. The only way to get out of this mess was to make an even bigger one. She slammed her hands on top of the principal's desk. A loud and obnoxious thud reverberated throughout the wood and instantly jarred the sleeping man from his nap. "Principal Figgins! Raccoon!"

The man jumped from his desk. His eyes frantic searched around the room. Santana could tell that the man had no idea where he even was and she doubted that he had even heard her. She shouted again. "Raccoon! Quick get the janitor! Get Beiste or at least Sue!"

He leapt from his chair and turned around at the cat. Tubbington picked the perfect time to hiss right above Figgins head. He screamed once and without hesitation bounded across the desk head long into Santana. "Raccoon!" Their eyes made contact for a brief moment after their collision before he recovered. "Stay here, Miss Lopez, while I get the janitor!"

Santana rolled her eyes. "I know. Just go. What a hero."

After a few moments, Santana dusted herself off the floor with a sigh of agitation. Brittany closed the door a second later and immediately went to Lord Tubbington. The cat purred contentedly in her arms. "You know those raccoons keep popping up."

"B, if I have to deal with _your_ raccoon one more time today, I am going call the animal control on LT."

"San, Lord Tubbington's a cat. You know that."

"Close enough."

Brittany narrowed her eyes suspiciously for a moment, but decided to let Santana's comment slide. She would have to give her an education on cats later. "Let's get- hey! Look at what's on Lord Tubbington's paw."

The blonde slid one hand from underneath the large cat to remove a slip of paper. It looked like a receipt. Santana reached over and took the paper from her girlfriend and read it out loud. "Specialties. Restoration. Plaques. Trophies and More. There's a order for one trophy to be reset and polished for two hundred dollars."

"Is that a receipt for repairing a trophy, San? Did Lord Tubbington find that? Nice! I always knew he would be great at this game."

"Are you kidding me? Little bastard did not know this was here. Tubbs was just looking for a little snack." Santana said giving the cat another glare.

"You can't be mad at him just because you're upset he accidently attacked you. He totally rocked this operation. I shouldn't have even questioned his motives."

"Accidently attacked me? That's an oxymoron, Britt, Tubbs didn't accidently do anything, but he did purposely attack me."

"San, don't call him a moron!" She put one hand over the cat's exposed ears. "He can hear you."

Santana rolled her eyes and sighed. She couldn't stay mad at Brittany and she knew that Tubbs was a subject that they always seemed to disagree on. "Fine, but we need to get the ball of fur out of here before Figgins comes back. I'll take the receipt and see if I can get an address and phone number. Maybe I can find out when the person plans to pick the trophy up from the shop. That should be the person who took the trophy."

"So should we meet at your place or mine?"

"I'll call you once I find out, but I'll prob pick you up."

"Okay, San. No glee and no cheerios, so I'll be waiting for your call."

"I could always give you a lift home." Santana said in a hushed voice before winking at the blonde. "And maybe a little more."

"We'd have to take Lord Tubbington in the car. And besides I like walking-"

"Say no more. Tubbs is _not_ coming in my car." Santana said quickly, but with a telling smile that made Brittany smile back.

"You know," Brittany's voice trailed for a moment as she took two steps to close the space between them. "If I really wanted you to take LT and I home, I don't think it would take much for me to convince you."

Santana tried not to melt as she felt her body instantly flush with heat at Brittany's come on. She opened her mouth, but could think of no response. Satisfied, Brittany smirked and turned away with Lord Tubbington in her hands. Santana waited for a few seconds till she was able to function before she too left Figgins' office.

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><p><em>Get rdy, B. We've got a date 2nite.<em>

_S! We have to solve the case first!_

_B…the date is for the case. I got the address to that store._

_Stake out! _

_Yes B. Stake out. Don't bring LT or the stakeout will be cat steak. _

_San! He reads my texts! Stop!_

_Dnt leave ur phone lying around. B rdy!_

Brittany didn't bother to respond to the last text message. She closed her phone and made sure to tuck it safely in her pocket. Even if Santana was confrontational to her cat, her girlfriend did have a point. Sometimes LT just couldn't help himself and texts always made him curious especially the ones from San.

Lord Tubbington didn't move from his resting place. Instead he continued to lazily nap at the bottom of the blonde's bed. Brittany watched him for one more minute just to make sure the feline wasn't going to pounce from his position. Finally she turned back to her closet and dug out a pair of black yoga pants and a long sleeve plain black shirt. Pleased with her outfit, Brittany turned around. "What do ya think Lord Tubbington?"

The cat blinked.

"You're right. I definitely need an accessory." Britt turned back to the closet and found a flat brim hat. She had picked it up from one of her dance classes. Apparently the guys that came in for class after her had really appreciated her moves. They had popped the hat on her and said she could come around to dance with them anytime. She gave herself a quick glance in the mirror and nodded. This would be the best stake out ever.

"Sorry, LT, but you heard San. No stake out for you. Besides you already had a lot of action today." Again the cat blinked at her.

Her footsteps hit the stairs easily and she landed on the wood floors of her house with barely a sound. Outside Santana honked her horn twice. Brittany hesitated. She glanced to the kitchen then to the front door. As much as she hated to make Santana wait, she sprinted to the kitchen and grabbed a bag. It took Brittany about three minutes to stuff it with an assortment of goodies and drinks.

Brittany almost made it out the kitchen when another blonde entered the room. A great big smile crossed her face. "Hey, Allie! I was just about to leave you a note."

Allie took one hard look from the bag in her younger sister's hand and the outfit that Brittany was wearing. "Should I even ask what you're planning to do tonight? I assume it has something to do with Santana."

Brittany couldn't stop herself from smiling at the mention of her girlfriend. "San and I are going to stake out this trophy shop to find out who took coach's 1989 championship trophy. It's pretty awesome. Lord Tubbington even made it in and out of school and the principal's office without setting off any alarms to help with our investigation."

Allie rolled her eyes and smiled. More than a few times every day she worried about her younger sister. Ever since she had been thrust into the role of sole caretaker, Allie had become even more protective of her younger sister. "Alright, I don't need to know anymore. I'm sure Santana will watch your back. Just make sure that you get in at a respectable hour. And please, please don't make the neighbors call the cops on you two again because you are fooling around in Santana's car. Just come inside if you really need to, okay?"

"Alright, but I promise San was only showing me the backseat. She just got the car and it was new and-"

"Uh! Stop right there! I don't want to know. I trust you. That's all we need to say. Now get out of here before she starts honking her horn again. I have a shift at the hospital tonight so I won't be in till later." Allie pulled Brittany in for a tight hug and a kiss to cheek. She tapped her butt and gave her younger sister a fake kick in the rear end to send her off. Brittany laughed and ran out the front door with the bag of goodies swaying and hopped into the red Mercedes parked out front.

Santana placed her hand on the horn and laid on it for a second. When the front door swung open she let go and glanced through the opened door. She caught sight of Allie and gave Britt's sister a brief head nod to acknowledge her. There had been quite a few times they had fought with each other especially concerning her relationship with Britt, but recently they had started to get along. Santana didn't like to admit to fault, but she had a feeling their current friendship was due in part to the Latina finally coming out of the closet.

Whatever.

She turned her gaze to her girlfriend. Brittany made it out of her house easily enough except now she was sticking to the shadows. The sun was slowly setting and the porch light came on automatically with the motion sensor. She crept along the side of the driveway hugging the garage door where the light from the porch couldn't reach. At least she was cute.

"Hey." Santana grinned as the blonde opened the car door and slid in.

"I'm ready!" Britt responded with a smile and a soft kiss on the lips which Santana returned eyes closed.

No matter how her heart fluttered at the touch of Brittany's lip, Santana instantly froze at the sight of the bag. "What's in the bag, Britt?"

"Snacks."

"Let me see." Dark eyes narrowed. At the sight of the snacks, Santana sighed in relief. "You're lucky and totally swag in that outfit."

"I know, right?" Britt responded with a smirk. Her hand went over the brim of her hat and she danced for a moment in her seat. "You look good too."

Brittany made sure to look her girlfriend up and down beneath the brim of her hat. Santana wore a tight fitting long sleeve gray shirt with a v-neck and a pair of jeans. It didn't matter what the girl wore, Britt just loved to see her out of the cheerios uniform sometimes.

"We're out of here. I got the address of this place on my gps and I called up the owner." Santana kicked the Mercedes into drive and sped off away from Brittany's house. "I pretended I was picking up the 1989 trophy and he asked if I was still planning on coming in at the same time I had set up. So I just asked for a reminder and he said at closing time today. So if we chill in the parking lot and see who walks out of there with the trophy it should be the person who took it, right?"

"You're so smart, San."

The red car sped down the highway easily working around cars. The radio blasting and the girls sang to every song. Santana eventually pulled off the highway and drove down a smaller street till they turned into large parking area with a few stores. The sign on the strip mall read, "Marty's Repairs". Santana didn't bother to contain her smile. She liked being right and impressing her girlfriend. She rolled into the strip mall and parked the car under a few trees in the back of the parking lot where they could watch the entrance in and out. Not many people went in and out of the strip mall probably because the location was bad and the variety of stores was worse. They were still an hour early to the closing time, but Santana wanted to get this case over with as quickly as possible.

"Well we've got time." San cut the engine to the car and looked over at the blonde.

"Yup. We got here with lots of time to assess the area. Good thinking."

"Yeah well I was hoping it be for more than thinking."

"San, we can't just fool around every time you get bored. Besides we are on the job now. We have a life time of Lucky Charms on the line." Britt leaned over the stick shift and gave the brunette a small tap on the nose. "Okay, baby?"

The corners of Santana's mouth stretched upwards till she couldn't help but break out into a wide smile. Her nose tingled like the rest of her body at the touch. "I figured you say something like that. So I brought you a bag of goodies and no, not like the snacks you brought."

Santana reached into the backseat and pulled out a small duffle bag. She plopped the bag in the blonde's lap with a smile of triumph and continued talking. "My cousins went through this whole hunting phase and then they started to use the equipment my parents bought them for their birthdays around the neighborhood. I caused this whole uproar when a few cops found them with binoculars in a tree trying to peek into a girl's window. Even worse was the family of the girl so mis tios had to give the gifts back. They've been sitting in my garage ever since. I never had the opportunity to use them."

Britt popped open the clutches and unzipped the bag like a child at Christmas. Santana laughed lightly as the blonde pulled out the binoculars, a utility belt with different attachments, a few tools, night vision goggles (those had been expensive), and a few other things Santana had thrown into the bag. The last part of the pack included a small tape recorder. It had been something that Santana knew her dad needed for working at the hospital, but she figured that he could just buy another one. If he wanted it, he could always ask. Not that he would even bother to ask his daughter if she had seen it. That would require interaction.

"Santana!" Britt exclaimed and instantly began to look through the binoculars towards Marty's Repairs. "This is going to be a piece of cake! LT is going to be so upset he missed using these. Although I'm sure he has a set of his own. He never shares his gadgets with me."

"Yeah well these are yours. Do _not _let me catch you letting LT touch them. Please."

"No way! I'll find a great hiding place for these in my room." Britt said. Her attention was still on the door of the store. She shifted the binoculars and adjusted focus. She could see the owner of the store lazily leaning on the counter. Not many customers. Beyond the counter, she could see the back room and what looked like another person working on setting a plaque correctly on a mounting block of wood. "These are so neat. I can't wait to use them in class. Might give me the advantage for seeing the board."

"You have to be paying attention first."

"Think I can make these things see in different colors?"

"I'll see if I can work on it." Santana shifted in her seat so she now faced her girlfriend. Brittany didn't notice. The top investigator of Lord Tubbington's Private Eye was too busy. Tanned fingers danced across the space between them. Without disturbing Brittany, Santana slid the duffle bag to the backseat again so there wouldn't be anything between them. She repeated the motion for the snack bag which the taller girl had brought from home. Santana had no intention of eating those goodies. At least not yet. She planned to have time for something much better.

"Looks quiet, but that's when things always get the most interesting." Britt spoke half to herself and half to the small recorder. "Store owner who I will call Marty has done nothing. He is tapping his fingers."

"Keep watching." Santana spoke in a hushed voice. Her fingers danced once more in the space between them. This time much closer to the blonde. She reached across Britt's lap to the lever of her seat and leaned Brittany back a few more inches. Brittany shifted in her seat to look down to see what her girlfriend was doing.

"What are you doing?"

"Giving you a better angle to watch the shop." Santana tapped one finger underneath Brittany's chin and turned her back towards to the store front. "Keep watching. You're going to miss our suspect."

Brittany hesitated for only a moment then put the binoculars back to her eyes. The Latina smirked and inched closer till her thighs pressed up against the stick shift between them. Her fingers once pulled back from the lever and ran along the dark material of Brittany's pants leg. The back of her hand ran up and down stroking Britt's knee. She did this for a few minutes till Santana was satisfied at the sound of the blonde's quickening breaths. Slowly the brunette opened and turned her hand around so her flat palm slowly worked to part the blonde's legs. Her palm caressed the inside of her leg still gently rubbing up and down.

"San, I told you-" Britt began to whine about her girlfriend's unfair stake-out tactics when her felt lips kissing then opening on her ear lobe. The words got caught in her throat. She could feel the hot moisture of her girlfriend's lips parting and licking. Goosebumps erupted all over her body. Britt moved to lean closer so Santana could do more. It didn't take long for the brunette to oblige. Her teeth caught hold of the bottom of her earlobe and she dragged it between her pearly white teeth for a moment waiting for a sweet sound. This time it was the blonde's turn to appease the other. She moaned for a half second. "San…I think this is against investigator rules."

"B, how many times have we watched spy movies?"

"Lots." She whispered barely able to keep the binoculars on her face as she felt nails scrape along the bottom of her shirt and tug at the hem playfully. The material twisted in the other girl's grip.

"What do all the good spies do?"

"Get the bad guys."

"And get down with each other. Trust me, Britt." Santana's hand tightened on the material of shirt and gave it a playful tug it. It exposed her flat stomach already tensed from the feel of Santana's playful intrusion. "Tell me what you see."

"Marty's moving to the backroom." Santana's nails dragged up her stomach pulling the shirt up with every inch. Brittany squirmed at the pressure and the rising cotton combined with the perfectly filed nails. "He's talk-talking to-" She stopped as she felt Santana's fingers hit the bottom of her bra. One finger slipped under the wire and pushed the bra up so Santana could run one long digit underneath her tit. Small amounts of perspiration gathered on her fingertip from the heat of the car and the way Santana was making Brittany feel. She leaned back from Britt for a second and smirked as she saw Britt not even looking through the binoculars anymore. Her eyes had slid sideways to make contact. Blue meeting sparkling brown. With Brittany's attention, Santana dipped her finger between her lips tasting the salty sweat with relish before she rocked her body right back into the blonde's body. Practically mounting her in the small space of the front seat.

"To who? Come on, B, keep talking." Santana leaned into her girlfriend's body again over the stick shift. Her lips whispered over the ridges and groves of her earlobe. Small kisses trailed down behind her neck and with her free hand she pushed back strands of blonde hair to reveal more exposed neck. Right as she got to the collarbone, the brunette's lips parted and sucked right between the bone and the base of the blonde's neck. She knew it would set Britt off. "I don't hear you." She teased between sucks and tiny bites against the girl's fair skin.

"The um- the other guy. They are talkin-mmm." The girl moaned loud as fingers which had been moving north squeezing tits through clothes suddenly plunged south back down her body to the waistband of her black pants. Encouraged by the sounds coming from Brittany the other girl brushed along the outside of her panties. San could already feel wetness from the folds of the dark material coming through. Her lips continued to move southwards around her collarbone till she was kissing the skin above her tit.

"About what?" Santana teased. She slipped her finger underneath the black panties and between her thighs careful not to touch the blonde where she wanted it. Her fingers ran up and down her inner thighs and along her hipbone.

"I don't know." Britt tried to pull away from the lens to look down at Santana and lean her head back in pleasure. But San quickly pushed her head back up and turned her cheek gently so she could only look forward out the window of the car. Her finger lingered around her jaw line taunting the blonde beauty.

"Stuff and cats and rain-" Santana ran her finger slowly between her legs now teasing at her opening. Britt instantly shifted to spread her legs wider in the seat. "-bows. And fu-" Brittany jumped up in the seat and instantly broke all contact with Santana. The binoculars now glued to her eyeballs.

"What the hell?" The provoker in the car shot back into her own seat after hitting the stick shift. Her face scrunched with anger and annoyance. "What was that for?"

"San, someone just pulled up!" Brittany had pressed the lens of the binoculars up against the inside glass of the car. "Look!"

"Well what does she look like?" Santana pulled back in her seat and readjusted her hair and shirt before also looking out the window. She couldn't make out the faces, but she could tell it was a woman. Couldn't anything in this case go right? She released a sigh of annoyance before resigning to the fact that she wouldn't be getting it on with Brittany at that moment.

"Brunette and short and she is picking up a trophy. Think it's our culprit?" Brittany talked into the recorder. "I wish Lord Tubbington was here. He would be able to instantly tell if she was guilty."

The blonde reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone. The photo clicking sound echoed throughout the car.

"I can't believe you bought him that phone. Don't tell me. You sent a pic to LT?" Santana cocked an eyebrow at her girlfriend.

"Maybe." Britt flashed the other girl a guilty smile. "She's leaving the shop. What should we do?"

"Follow her." Santana sat back in her seat and turned the car on. She idled for a minute and waited for the woman to pull out of the parking lot. The red car sped off onto the highway. This time the radio wasn't on and Santana's knuckles were white from gripping the wheel.

"S, um you know that you aren't supposed to literally tail the person we are tailing."

Santana blinked hard and realized she had been practically running the small green Oldsmobile with the woman and the trophy off the road. She peeled back and ducked behind a few more cars. "My bad."

The trip lasted another ten minutes and not surprisingly the car ducked into a neighborhood not that far from McKinley High. This time Santana made sure that she didn't make it obvious they were following the woman. Around a few more streets, the green car finally pulled into a _very _familiar house. "Shit." Santana whispered under her breath. "You've got to be kidding me. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised."

"Isn't this coach's house?"

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><p><strong>No way it can be this easy! :D<strong>


	4. Trophy Catalog

**Thank you for the adds and alerts! Also a BIG BIG thank you for the reviews. It's really nice to hear feedback of any kind! :D**

**Sorry if anyone gets a double alert for this chapter. I posted it earlier today and yet it wasn't showing up at all even though it tells me it's there. Sorry I just want to make sure it actually gets posted!  
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><p><strong>IV. Trophy Cat alog<strong>

"Yeah it is. Remember when we egged it with Puck last summer? He had found out her address when he broke into the personnel records in Figgins office. Her face had been priceless." Santana shook her head in disbelief. "But for her to set us up? My bullshit detector must be off cause I could have sworn the dragon wasn't lying. Besides she always has us spy on glee club. Why would she not involve us this time?"

"She wasn't on my list of suspects." Brittany frowned. She turned back to her bag and pulled her notebook. "I mean, why would she hire us to find the culprit if she's involved."

"Coach is all sorts of unhinged most of the time." Santana narrowed her eyes and began to reach for the ignition.

"San, what are you doing?" Brittany covered the Latina's hand to prevent her from turning the key.

"I'm not going to sit out here and be punked by Sue and stay here all night cause she played us. Come on. Let's go back to your house. Isn't Allie working tonight? That means we get the whole house to ourselves."

"But that's not Sue who walked in with the trophy. Coach is a blonde! We don't know who that lady is and that means we don't know if she's not returning the stolen trophy before coach knows!" Brittany leaned forward. Her bottom lip jutted out in a pout and her blue eyes widened. "Please, San, can't we at least look and make sure that we got the right bad guy."

Santana sighed. Brittany's pouts were undeniable and certainly more irresistible than Puck sauce or whatever Puck had been talking about earlier that day. Her dark eyes lingered on the quivering lips and her girlfriend's big eyes. "Fine, but we have to do this stealthy. As much fun as egging Sylvester's house was last time, it was only fun cause we weren't caught. So you are going to have to lose the hat."

Brittany didn't even care when Santana removed the hat from her head because she was so excited. She picked up the recorder once more. "We are pursuing the suspect who picked up the trophy from Marty's. We have followed the unidentified woman all the way back to Coach Sylvester's house. Very fishy if you ask me even if there are no fish."

"B, you can finish your entry later. We still have to find a way to observe this chick without Sylvester observing us." Santana gave her girlfriend a head nod as a way to get her moving.

They both opened their doors at the same time. Britt grabbed the belt from Santana's bag of goodies and strapped it around her waist with a satisfied expression. She even twirled around so Santana could get a better look at her new accessory. "I look hot. Like a ghost buster but for criminals."

"Or maybe a carpenter." Santana smirked, but her eyes told a different story. The dark pools of brown looked the other girl up and down. "Good thing I think you look good in anything."

"Ha!" Britt snorted. "You think I look good in nothing even more."

The blonde threw a flirtatious wink over her shoulder before she bounded away from the red car. Santana opened her mouth, but closed it quickly. Somehow Brittany always got the last word. No choice left but to follow the blonde, Santana skipped around the car and caught up to walk alongside Brittany.

They walked around the bushes which lined the street and peeked around to the front yard. Luckily it seemed that the woman hadn't noticed them or the parked red car which had followed them from the Marty's store.

"Do you know what you're doing, B?"

"Of course. I've been watching Scooby-Doo forever. It's time to split up!"

Santana frowned. "Serious?"

Brittany nodded vigorously. Blonde locks of hair bobbed up and down. "You go that way." She pointed to the backside of the garage. "And I'll go that way." This time she pointed to the opposite side of the house. "They always do it on the shows."

"Fine." Santana's frown deepened, but she didn't argue. With a deep huff and a few mumbled words in Spanish, she walked towards the garage. Her eyes glanced up towards the double doors wary of motion sensors like the ones at Brittany's house, but no light ever came to life. As she rounded the corner of the garage past the green Oldsmobile, Santana made one longing glance back to where she had left her Britt. But she couldn't see the blonde investigator extraordinaire anywhere. Leave it to the dancer to have skipped across an entire yard without making a sound and to have already snuck around the house while Santana stood like an idiot looking back wistfully like it was a movie or something. She kicked at a loose rock on the driveway and sighed once more.

The garage doors had been secured and closed by the time they had arrived at Sue's house so they hadn't even seen the woman enter. Santana did find a side door to the garage and a few windows. If Brittany gave her a boost then Santana was sure that she could push open the window and crawl through the space.

Santana pulled out her cell phone from her tight jeans pocket and began a text to Brittany. Knowing Britt, Santana figured that the blonde was already inside questioning their only suspect and getting them kicked off the cheerios. Images of Sue sitting in a chair and yelling at Britt flooded her mind.

Her finger pushed the send button right as she felt strong fingers around her waist. Suddenly hands pulled her back into a warm and familiar body. Flushed against Brittany's front, Santana smiled softly at the contact and leaned her head back to look up into blue eyes. A small vibration tickled her backside.

"I think I got a text."

"I was just wondering where you were." Santana turned around in the blonde's arms and hooked her hands behind the other girl's neck.

"Me? I was over there." Britt tilted her head back to bushes only a few feet from where Santana had been standing.

"The whole time?"

"Of course! Hello, it's always bad to split up! Plus I didn't want to be that far away from you, but I couldn't help but practice some of my awesome spy skills on you." Brittany smiled.

"See anything you like?" Santana batted back playfully.

"Maybe." Brittany said. Santana leaned in for a kiss, but met with Britt's long fingers on her puckered lips. "But I can't tell you what I saw until this case is finished, San."

"Fine, but I am going to remember this."

"You better." Britt pulled away from Santana and looked at the door. "So what were you thinking? A boost to the window because you know that coach would have safe guarded against that."

"I didn't even think about that. Yeah she would be crazy enough to do that."

Britt looked back to the door. Her lips turned down at the corner with disappointed. She shifted her eyes down as well and caught sight of the belt around her waist. Instantly her mood brightened. "San! Do you think you can go all Lima Heights Adjacent on the door? You know like pick the lock or something?"

The taller girl opened herself up for Santana to have a full look at her belt of goodies so she could pick out the right tool. Except San didn't have the heart, or to be exact, the courage to actually admit to her girlfriend that despite whatever she claimed in school, Santana didn't have razor blades in her hair and she had certainly never picked a door lock before. "Sure. Um…I'll just use these ones."

She picked out the smallest longest tool she could find. It kinda looked like a much smaller and very ineffective nail file so maybe with some luck she would be able to work the door. She kept her head down so she wouldn't have to meet Brittany's eyes. Her body shifted to block the blonde's view of the door. The small needle looking thing fit into the key slot easily enough, but after that, Santana had no clue what she was doing. Instead of admitting defeat, the Latina jiggled the latch and the needle a few times even turned the knob to make it look convincing. After a few more tries she finally turned to Brittany and shrugged her shoulders. "Sorry, babe, I tried."

Unbeknownst to Santana, Brittany could see everything her girlfriend was doing with the needle. And no matter how much Santana tried to protest or pretend, Britt also knew that Santana had never picked a lock. Yet Britt knew how important Santana's badass image was – even in front of her girlfriend.

"I'm sure you got it, San. You prob just didn't turn it enough." Britt smiled innocently and pretended to not see the guilt on Santana's face. "Let me try?"

Santana breathed a sigh of relief when her girlfriend didn't call her out. She moved out of the blonde's way so she could try to undo the lock. "Sure go for it."

Brittany made sure that Santana couldn't see her when she worked the lock. It took about two second for the door to make click and swing open. Brit opened her mouth in fake surprise and excitement. "See! I barely touched it. Good job, San!"

"But I-" Santana's jaw dropped as the door swung open. What had just happened? She was sure she hadn't unlocked it and yet Brittany just turned the knob. Her jaw snapped shut real fast. "Not bad. I should have been able to do it faster, but I'm a little rusty."

Brittany only nodded. She loved confident and sexy Santana so it was better this way. "Let's not waste time! And don't forget that woman is still in here somewhere and maybe coach."

They walked into the garage and were assailed by a variety of smells, but one in particular lingered in the air. It lingered in the air for a minute like a musky fruit smell until it dissolved into the rest of the smells from the garage. There were two cars parked. One was covered by a tarp and the other, the girls recognized as Sue's car. Brittany pointed to it. "Think coach is home?"

"We're about to find out."

Despite the smells and various objects lying on the ground, the girls had no trouble travelling to the other side of the garage. The door which led into the house hadn't been locked. Santana twisted the knob easily, but waited before opening it. "B, this is a really bad idea."

Brittany nodded in agreement, but it didn't stop the blonde from giving the signal to open the door an inch. Her head bobbed to the space created and she squinted to get a good look inside. The door led to Sue's kitchen, but it held no Sue. That had to be a good thing.

"I think the coast is clear."

Santana gave the door a small push just enough to let the other girl through. Britt slid into the crack and tip toed cautiously around the island in the kitchen. The lights were out and she didn't hear any sounds from any of the other rooms. Her partner-in-investigation wasn't too far behind. The two girls ducked behind the island in the dark. Their heart beats sounded like booming drums in the darkness. "We are so screwed if she catches us."

"Don't worry about it, San. We are authorized to investigate and she'll understand."

"After she kills us." Santana added under her breath.

The kitchen looked like any other kitchen in any other suburban home. Well that was except for the trophies strategically placed on every counter, cabinet, and corner. There were trophies holding up the cabinets. Pots and pans were hooked from golden cheerleaders' pompoms. At one corner of the room a trophy that was the size of Santana stood with an apron wrapped around it like a mannequin.

"We need to find that trophy."

"We need to get the hell out of here."

"Come on." Brittany tugged at the girl's darker hand and yanked her upright. They stuck to the shadows of the room careful not to touch anything. Santana's footsteps fell directly in line with Brittany's. The dancer had the most graceful way of placing the tips of her Converse shoes on the tile and dropping her heels in a way that made no noise. But the Latina couldn't waste any time admiring her girlfriend as she continued to yank her towards the hallway. At the end of the kitchen, Britt pulled back so that only half her face and blonde wisps of hair could lean out into the hallway. Again it was dark. And again no sign of life. She put one foot on the carpet, but froze.

The brunette woman from Marty's opened one of the doors in the hallway whistling. Now that Brittany was closer she could see that the woman was middle aged and while she had brown hair, she also had small strands of steel tips at her temples. She definitely wasn't Sue Sylvester. In her hands she carried a three and a half foot trophy. With both hands around the base of the golden and glittering emblem of Sue perfection she couldn't use her hands to open a door to her right. So she butted up against it with her backside. Blue eyes quickly scanned the trophy and saw the 1989 clearly even from the distance.

Britt let out a sigh of relief. "That was close."

"Was it the dragon?" Santana's grip tightened on Brittany's hand.

"No, but it was definitely coach's trophy."

"Why would Sue hire us for a trophy that she sent to the repair shop? And who was that lady? You recognize her at all?" Santana pulled Brittany closer so the blonde was no longer half in the hallway and half in the kitchen.

"No, but-" Brittany shut her mouth quick. Her entire tensed and tightened. Santana creased her eyebrows and shook the blonde's hand.

"Britt! Hello! Britt, 'no, but' what? Are you even listening to me right now?" Santana shook her hand again. Dark eyes followed Brittany's sight which was no longer on the brunette. Instead Brittany and now Santana could see the ominous presence of a very real, very standing in the kitchen, and very Sue Sylvester.

"Now normally I expect students and especially cheerios, such as yourselves, to be cowering in fear of me as I have dedicated the second part of my career to establishing my dominance and superiority by means of brute force at McKinley, but I also expect it to be done outside of my household. I am not sure how to react at this moment to your intrusion. So I will give you five seconds to explain yourselves after that I can't promise that I won't have you both hanging upside down while I decide which way to punish you." Sue tapped her foot. But neither girl moved. "Speak! Lopez go!"

Santana stuttered for a moment. Her mouth opened and she heard noises, but not words. She dropped Brittany's hand and tried again. "Coach-"

"I'm going to stop you right there, Lopez. Clearly you are too intimidated by the 'dragon.'" Sue raised her hand to stop her from talking. Santana felt a deep blush rise through her cheeks. How long had Sue been there listening to them? "Pierce, I assume you are the head of this operation. Explain yourself before your sputtering partner gets the two of you kicked out of the cheerios so fast you won't be able to look at any breakfast cereals without feeling motion sickness."

"Well you see, coach." Britt started off. "Lord Tubbington was trying to eat the school fishes and Principal Figgins was sleeping so we devised a brilliant plan and Santana got the principal out of his office and I was talking to the secretary about the importance of proper stretching techniques especially while sitting all day like she does and I was telling her about the way I sometimes blink my eyes real fast to keep those muscles exercised so I never go blind and when we got into the office-"

"To the point. Your seconds are way up and I got lost at about the fifth time you used the word 'and.'" Sue practically growled. Both girls jumped at the noise.

"We found a receipt to a trophy repair shop in Figgins and followed the lead. We thought it was your trophy. We watched a woman load it into her car so we tailed her." Santana interjected. "We followed her all the way here and she went into your house with the trophy. I thought you were playing us, but Brittany thought you were being sincere yesterday. We couldn't leave the case open."

"So we might have – sort of broken into your house to see what the woman was doing with your trophy." Britt tried to help.

"I see." Sue spoke each word slowly and drew them out while thinking. "And what did this woman look like?"

"Middle age. Medium built. A little on the chunky side with brown hair, a little grey at the tips. And she just walked into one of those rooms down the hall." Britt described her.

Sue's mouth pushed all the way to the side and back as she thought to herself. Finally she spoke. "Before I decide how to kill and dispose of your bodies, I am going to talk to my cleaning maid, Lydia, to find out why she had my trophy. You are sure it was my trophy? The one from my office?"

"No."

"Yes." Brittany said overtop of Santana's voice and shot the Latina a look to which Santana only shrugged.

"Lydia!" Sue bellowed. "Lydia, are you home?"

The sound of a door opening from the hallway was accompanied by another voice. "Of course, Sue! I was just tidying up! I just got home a few minutes ago."

The woman stopped talking when she entered the kitchen and flicked on the lights to the sight of Sue and two teenage girls. Normally Lydia didn't ask too many questions, but just cleaned and treated each trophy like Sue's child. Sue liked Lydia. Lydia did whatever she was told. More importantly she wouldn't just let anyone come into Sue's house. Unfortunately after Sue had that terrible breakdown when Will had broken up with her, Sue had to let her other maid go. She had been tainted by that greasy hair and charming smile. Lydia would never let Will Schuster set foot inside of her great sanctuary.

"Would you care to explain where you were just coming in from?" Sue asked gently.

"I was just following your instructions. You left a note that said I needed to pick up groceries, protein mix for your milkshakes, and a trophy. I got the groceries, but the store didn't have any fruit that looked good enough for you. So I will have to make a trip to the farmer's market tomorrow." Lydia smiled sweetly making eye contact with the two girls. "Do you want me to make something for your guests?"

"No, Lydia, that won't be necessary. Just pretend you don't see them." The two girls tried to sink even further into the wall behind them. "You said I left a note?"

"Well, no you left two notes. I just figured that you forgot something and added it before you left in the morning."

"Interesting." Sue's eyes narrowed. "Since I only wrote you one note this morning. Do you still have the notes?"

"Oh no, I threw them out while I was shopping. I didn't really need them."

"Pity." Sue mused in a whisper to herself. "Where did you put the trophy?"

"I set it up in your sitting room. I didn't recognize it. So I didn't know its proper place."

"Lopez. Pierce. On the double! March behind me and make sure you touch nothing or it will be the last thing you touch."

"Yes, coach." The two girls fell in line behind Sue as the red suited jumpsuit clad woman made her way towards the door Britt had watched Lydia go into.

Sue bust open the room and took an inventory of her trophies. Everything in her head matched what she physically saw in front of her. All her trophies were in the correct places. Most shone with the glimmer of victory and of course from Lydia's polish Except something wasn't right. The air smelled differently, but she couldn't quite place why something felt wrong. "Lydia, where did you say you put the trophy?"

"Just on the coffee table. It should be there!" Lydia called in from the kitchen.

Three sets of eyes went to the coffee table. Three sets of eyes widened. Two sets widened with fear. One set of eyes widened with surprised before instantly narrowing to tight lines of rage. Again Sue released a low guttural sound from deep in her throat perhaps to confirm that Sue was indeed a dragon.

No trophy stood on the coffee table. Instead the only thing that remained on the surface was lipstick. The bright red words "GLEE" mocked the coach. They were the only clue as to where the trophy would have been only five minutes ago. Even Brittany and Santana felt their faces flush with the indignation. Someone from glee had actually snuck into Sylvester's house while they had been talking and stolen the trophy from under their noses? How? Or perhaps the more important question was who?

Both girls tensed and braced themselves for the onslaught that would be Sue Sylvester's rage. They squeezed each other's hand and their eyes tight. But after a few minutes of silence, they finally opened their eyes. In those few moments, Sue had moved from standing at the coffee table with her fists clenched to sitting calmly on a couch which so happened to be one of the few objects of furniture that didn't come accompanied by a trophy.

"Please, have a seat, ladies." Sue called to them in an eerily calm voice. Santana and Brittany risked a glance to one another to confirm that Sue's "not-angry-voice" was indeed much scarier than her freaking out. They would have preferred to see her go into one of her famous temper tantrums. "Sit. Now."

They both went to the opposite couch. A trophy the size of Brittany already occupied the one cushion so Santana sat on Brittany's lap.

"It's come to my attention that the matter at hand it much graver than I originally thought when I hired you two and the cat." Sue spread her fingers out in front of her mouth and tapped them against each other in a calculated manner. "I still can't take matters into my own hands, but I did catch you two delinquents breaking into my house. You can breathe, Lopez, you're still on the cheerios, but as punishment, I am now part of your little operation."

"What?" Santana barked out before she could stop herself. "I mean," She cleared her throat and spoke without the added attitude. "I'm sorry coach. I am not sure what you mean by joining our operation. We are pretty exclusive and besides you're way too old for any games of operation between myself and Britt."

"While I am flabbergasted at your suggestion, I confess that I am too much of a woman for the little girl relationship between the two of you. What I mean is that I want to know all of your intel on the trophy case. I will have the culprit. And you two will make sure I am there when you catch him or her. That means you will call me the next time you plan on breaking into another house or the school or even Figgins office. Do you understand me? I will be there."

"But coach!" Santana stood up from her girlfriend's lap. "That's crazy! You can't just follow us around the school or even into the glee club because they will know something is up!"

"I'm not even allowed to bring Lord Tubbington to school anymore because he almost blew our cover." Brittany added.

"Ladies, I don't want to follow you around in the mundane routine of your lives. But the next time you plan a sting operation like the stunts you pulled tonight. You will call me. Because this." Sue pointed to the bright red lipstick on the table taunting all three of them. "This will never happen again. It's personal. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, coach." Now Brittany stood up.

"Can I at least examine the scene of the crime?" Brittany asked.

"You're free to do what you want, partner." Sue shook her head and stood up. Her voice bounded through the small room out to Lydia in the kitchen. "I need an extra extra protein shake, Lydia!"

"Fuck. We are so screwed now, B." Santana whispered excitedly once Sue had left the room.

"We should take a picture of this. Do you recognize this shade?" Brittany didn't respond to Santana's fears. She pulled out her phone and snapped a picture of the words on the table. She reached into her pocket and smeared a corner of the red lipstick onto a tissue in her pocket.

"Britt, are you listening to me?"

"Yes, but San, we have clues here. Like legit clues! How awesome? Plus we need to get a sample of the lipstick and see if we can compare it to all the girls' lipsticks in glee." Britt carefully folded the tissue and put it into an empty compartment on the utility belt.

"You're really going to solve this case, aren't you?" Santana sighed and shook her head.

"No, but we are." Brittany gave Santana a peck on the cheek before grabbing her hand. "Come on."

"Ladies, please use the front door this time." Sue's voice came from the kitchen. "I set up a booby trap when I came in and discovered the door had been jimmied open. And trust me, it's a nasty one."

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><p><strong>So Sue has now set herself as a partner in Lord Tubbington: Private Eye. And lipstick? Could it be one of the glee girls? Which one would gain from stealing from Sue? And did the girls forget about the broken glass case?<strong>


	5. Lipstick ConfisCating

**Thank you so much for the reviews from the last chapter! You guys literally doubled my reviews! And because of that encouragement, I haven't been able to stop writing! So I am updating early again. (I can't always promise installments this fast, but I will try! ;)**

**As for the identity of our trophy thief…I can't reveal that yet! Haha But I can say that it is a character in the gleeverse. So no made-up player for the sake of a story that means you can guess all you want!**

**Again thank you and any feedback is always welcomed! Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>V. Lipstick ConfisCating<strong>

"Just respond to her!"

"I don't see why it has to be me!"

"Because I couldn't get Lord Tubbington to finish the conversation he started! I think he's hiding now."

"Great! Let the cat decide our fate!"

"Well if you would have just picked up your phone the first time it rang, LT wouldn't have rolled over on it!"

"B…" Santana practically growled the girl's name.

"S…" Brittany ignored the growl and instead reached out across the bed. Her long slender fingers slid from beneath the sheets and travelled up till they made contact with the other girl's nose. The blonde revealed a smile - one of pure satisfaction and confidence. Santana _would _answer the phone. "She did call you. I mean you are the co-captain of the cheerios. Maybe it has something to do with practice. She can't always rely on Becky."

"Fine." Santana grumbled under her breath before she lifted the cell phone to her ear. She clicked the unhold button. Her voice revealed her anxiety as she addressed Sue Sylvester. "Sorry to keep you waiting, coach. I was finishing up my morning workout and I hate to stop half way through a set."

Santana lied. Obviously.

Currently the two cheerleaders were entwined beneath light purple sheets. Their bodies interlocked in a familiar position. Britt lay on her back and Santana had pressed herself in the spaces between the blonde's limbs. The Latina's left leg had swung over the other girl's hip so that her knee rested on Brittany's thigh. Santana had fallen asleep naked with her head resting gently on Britt's chest and her hair, like her fingers, splayed across silky smooth skin. Brittany had her hands wrapped protectively and loving over Santana's backside. They hadn't moved since their late night sexcapade when they had both fallen asleep from exhaustion.

That was until an annoying ringing had jarred them both from their deep sleep. They had tried their best to ignore it, but Lord Tubbington had jumped from nowhere and pounced on Santana's phone unfortunately answering the call. If asked, Santana would have sworn that the cat had done it on purpose.

Sue's voice from beneath their sheets had startled them both from their lazy morning lounge. It wasn't often that coach allowed them to have a morning without a before school practice. Brittany had been the first to react to coach's voice yelling "Hello. Hello!" over and over again. Britt had grabbed the phone and quickly answered with a sweet fake voice that held a soft mixture of an eastern European accent. And of course, the blonde's first instincts were to pretend to be a receptionist. "_Santana Lopez's office. Please hold while I transfer you."_

The look on Santana's face had been priceless - a mixture of horror, pride, and anxiety. But since Sue was on the line waiting for Santana, they had spent the past five minutes fighting over who would be the one to talk to Sue.

"Nice try, sandbags, I doubt your heart rate is even above 60 beats per minute and your breathing is all wrong. So unless you've started doing sets of crunches in your dreams, I doubt that you've even looked at a person running this morning because that would have taken more energy than the amount of effort you put into that lie." Sue's voice reverberated through the phone in such an abrasive manner even Britt could hear coach through the phone against Santana's ear. "As for tweedle-dee, tell her if she would like some lessons on perfecting her fake accents that my Great Aunt Rada would love to have an extra set of hands on her farm in Romania for the summer."

Santana's face dropped. Nothing like a good Sylvester verbal beat down before 7:00 am to start off the day. She refused to move though. Despite Sue on the phone, Brittany continued to stroke her girlfriend's backside and Santana would die before she let anyone, even her coach, take this moment away from her.

"You caught us. Guilty. What do you want, coach? We don't have practice this morning."

"Of course you don't. I make the practices follow the schedule of the 1980 US Olympic Hockey team the year they beat Russia and went on to win the Gold medal." Sue shot back. Santana looked up to Britt's bright blue eyes. They shared the same confusion. "But I digress. I just wanted to call to remind you that you two still need to make some real progress on the case. I expect a list of suspects by the end of the school day or I will be taking my own investigation to the glee club. And it won't be pretty."

"But I have a list of suspects." Brittany said loud enough for Sue to hear.

"Tell your companion that I want a real list of at least ten names by the end of the day. Not that list of colors and rainbows that I have seen Brittany coloring. This way I can begin my own interrogations."

"Coach, ten names? That's almost like the entirety of glee club. You couldn't possibly be able to narrow it down from there. It would be like accusing the entire club of stealing your trophy including Britt and I!" Santana went through the names in her head – Will, Finn, Puck, Mike, Artie, Sam, Kurt, Blaine, Rachel, Quinn, Mercedes, Tina, Britt, and herself. Literally besides the two cheerleaders there were like ten people in glee club.

"Well you better have a better way of giving me a suspects list before the end of the day because I will take this war to all the kids in glee club. Do I make myself clear, Lopez?"

"Yes." Her voice was curt and agitated.

"Good!" Sue's voice picked up in tone. "Have a lovely day, ladies!"

"Bitch!" Santana slammed the phone to the side of the bed on Brittany's end table.

"It's fine, San." Britt cooed and stroked her fingers through the dark hair of the girl lying on top of her. "We have the lipstick lead."

"I guess you're right." Santana sighed as the blonde's fingers scratched softly at her scalp. "B, what if we don't go into school today at all. I could stay like this forever."

Brittany couldn't help but smile wide. She could feel her whole body tingling and her skin hum with love at Santana's admission. Her insides felt so warm. The blankets shifted as her other hand ran down Santana's spine. Every bump and groove she knew by heart. Even if they had never slept naked with each other until recently, Brittany knew every inch of her girlfriend's body. "Lord Tubbington gets pretty protective of his alone time. He prob wouldn't like sharing the room with us all day."

"Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about." Santana lifted her head an inch. Normally when Brittany deflected she did it in the presence of others. She gave her girlfriend a poke in the stomach.

"I love you too."

"That's much better." Santana let herself smile as she sunk back into Britt's embrace. They stayed like that for a few more moments.

A knock at the door once again disrupted the girls.

"Can't we just get a few minutes in bed before the world needs our hotness?" Santana let out a ragged sigh.

The voice from across the door was Allie, Brittany's sister. "Hey, I know you two are in there. In fact, I know a great deal more about my sister than I ever wanted to after I got off my shift early last night and walked into what I can only hope was a Discovery Channel episode on exotic animal callings."

Santana had to cover her mouth to stop herself from busting up with laughter. Brittany on the other hand cocked her head to the side. She whispered to Santana. "I don't remember watching tv last night." Then in a voice loud enough for her sister she said, "Didn't watch tv last night, Allie! Did you at least record the episode? It sounds useful especially if we go camping or some place exotic like Canada!"

Now Santana was laughing. Her entire body shook over the blonde's stretched out form. There was no way of telling what was louder – Santana's laughter or the dead silence from Allie on the other side of the door.

"I just- I don't even know what to say. You two are ridiculous." The two girls could practically hear Allie shaking her head in disbelief. "I just wanted to remind you two that you are going to be late for school if you don't get out of here now. There was an accident or something on the highway so take another way."

"Thanks, Allie!" Britt called back cheerfully.

"Yeah, yeah. I love you! Please be careful with all that spy detective stuff you and Santana are doing."

Santana couldn't help but be the first to respond. "Oh! Don't worry, Al. I will make sure I take very good care of your sister. As I am sure you heard last night."

"Uh!" Allie threw her hands up in the air and Santana could have sworn she heard her stomping. "Get out of here!"

Santana laughed uncontrollably for a few more minutes. Brittany just watched with a small grin on her face as if she knew something the brunette didn't. When Santana noticed, she turned herself around so she lay flat over Brittany's stomach. "What are you grinning at?"

"You."

"Why?" Santana felt thrown off by the comment. Her smile instantly diminished.

"I like it when you laugh like this. You should do it more even at school."

"I only feel this way around you." Santana mumbled under her breath and into her girlfriend's stomach so it would be hard to hear. A pink blush rose to her cheeks and she instantly felt embarrassed. Brittany didn't say anything, but she had heard Santana quite clearly. The silence made Santana squirm a little till she finally felt like she needed to fill it with something she could control.

Santana shifted her body so that her legs now straddled either side of her girlfriend. Her hair hung around her and when she dipped down to hover right over Brittany's face the dark strands brushed against ivory skin. Brittany couldn't help but check Santana's naked body out as she moved above her. Unblemished skin that curved at her breasts and deepened at her waist at all the right angles. The glow of the morning still radiated from the tanned flesh which last night had been glistening with drops of perspiration from their activities. And of course from this angle, Brittany couldn't help but drop her eyes to two perfect breasts which bounced slightly from Santana's movements. Her nipples were slightly hard from exposure to the air out of the protection of the sheets. Brittany suppressed the urge to reach and flick one of those pink buds with her tongue.

"My eyes are up here." Santana said playfully.

"I know." Brittany responded, but didn't look up.

Instead she finally gave in to temptation and leaned forward to give the bud a quick lick. Santana's face went from surprise to pleasure instantly. Encouraged by the reaction, Britt attached her mouth to her girlfriend's tit. Her tongue flicked mercilessly over and over the hardened nub. Her hands worked down to Santana's hips to help pull her closer and push her down against her own aching core. It didn't take much to get them going. Santana rolled her hips down into Brittany's already gyrating body and her hands went to the back of the blonde's head to urge her to work on her tits with greater speed. Dark eyes closed and she leaned arching her back as she furiously rode her girlfriend's hips.

Britt obliged and took the nipple into her mouth just underneath her teeth so she could massage the nub with her tongue to the roof of her mouth. She repeated over and over again. Their hips were now crashing together trying to create the friction necessary to assuage the burning need within both of them. Santana reached down between them and shoved her hand right up against Brittany's pussy. She maneuvered her fingers till they slipped between her girlfriends slick folds, but only kept her finger right on the outside. Brittany snapped her eyes open and looked up from her suckling. She knew what Santana wanted. The girl instantly lifted herself up even further from the bed. Her hips and abs tensed to hover a few inches from the mattress so she could ride the fingers just on the precipice of her entrance.

The brunette threw her head back at Brittany's added motions as they both rode the hand between them. The blonde hit the fingers rocking the lips of her pussy while Santana felt her own knuckles hit her clit violently with every rock of their bodies. The mouth on her nipple and the friction growing between their bodies quickly resulted in a stunning shared orgasm. They both cried out and continued to ride the waves of pleasure building and releasing over and over again. Santana's hand was soaked down to the wrist when she finally pulled it from Brittany's swollen second set of lips.

Their foreheads touched. Their lips were only a centimeter from each other as their breaths mingled hot and heavy. Finally their eyes made contact. A shared connection passed between them. Goosebumps, like a wave, traveled down Brittany's back across her arms and through her heart till they transferred to Santana's own hands skipping up the brunette's limbs around her shoulders and then settled into her heart as well.

"I love you." Santana whispered softly against their connected lips.

Brittany whispered the same words back. Sex was definitely better with feelings.

Eventually they untangled themselves and got dressed. Each girl couldn't think clearly or even formulate words. Despite washing away the morning sex in the shower, in their minds they were still in each other's arms in bed. As they opened the door to leave, Santana turned to see Allie standing at the end of the hallway.

"You couldn't even wait till I left for work? Like seriously the walls are _not _that thick. That's something that will take years of therapy and time to erase."

"You should really get yourself a girlfriend, Allie. Or at least a personal _helper_. They sell some of those at Spencer's for a decent price." Santana smirked and threw her girlfriend's sister a wink. "Cause if you are disturbed by that…your boyfriend's clearly not getting the job done."

Brittany finally came out of the room and looked at the exchange between her sister and her girlfriend. But she thought nothing of it. "Love you, Allie! Have a good day and I'll see you for dinner!"

* * *

><p>The school day had gone by without any major hitches. Occasionally the two girls caught sight of coach. The cheerios leader, commander, and now part-time partner of Lord Tubbington's Private Eye would give the girls a knowing head nod. Afraid to do anything but pretend that they knew why Sue was giving them a head nod, Santana and Brittany would bob their heads back at her before scurrying around the corner to avoid verbal contact with Sue. The day continued in this same fashion. They didn't have any opportunities to try comparing the lipsticks of the glee girls as most of the time Britt and Santana weren't with the other girls until glee.<p>

Today glee club met right after the last bell. Sue had texted Santana to remind her that she expected results and names at the end of glee practice or that she would take matters into her own hands.

Brittany took her usual seat next to Santana this time. Finn and Rachel sat in the front row. They were engaged in some sort of strange salvia exchange. Not only was it physically disturbing to look at, Santana was convinced that anything that looked that gross had to be painful to participate in. And she wasn't the only one disturbed by the tongue war in the front row. Quinn at one point made eye contact with the Latina. No words needed to be said. Some things were just wrong.

Mercedes and Kurt were doing runs at the piano. Puck literally sat in the corner flexing his muscles. At one point he pointedly locked eyes with Brittany and gave her an air kiss. Santana wasted no time and leaned over her girlfriend's lap to hit Puck with a vicious glare. Blaine sat with his head framed by both his ridiculous looking bow tie and his hands under his chin. His eyes were glued to Kurt. Tina and Mike were missing. Something about Asian couples counseling and homework study group. No one really bothered them about it since it was one of the stipulations Mike's father had set for him to continue dancing. Sam was trying to teach Artie how to do some impressions of famous actors, but it sounded anything but impressive.

Santana pulled out her phone.

_Nd to get the lipsticks_

_How?_ Britt responded with lightning speed.

_We nd to distract them so we can gt into purses_

Brittany was about to type back that she had no idea how to do that when Mr. Schue walked into the classroom. His hands held what they could only guess were new sheets of music. It wasn't like they knew every song they sang in glee club by heart. They had to spend a good amount of time, practice, and a good amount of Sue's budget to make copies of sheet music.

"Alright, kids. Let's take a seat." He ushered most of the kids back to their seats with that goofy smile on his face. "Now I said that we were going to be doing a theme the other day. Unfortunately we were missing half the glee because the football team had to go over a few new plays for their game on Friday. Not a problem. But I did think of a theme for us!"

Rachel clapped her hands excitedly in the front row. Santana made eye contact with Mercedes and they both rolled their eyes. No doubt Berry had somehow influenced the song choice and theme for the week.

He passed out the papers first to Artie and then split the packet up for the class to pass around. Mercedes was the first to groan followed directly by Rachel. Santana took one look at the packet and rolled her eyes. Did no one in this club have an original thought? Like ever?

"Mr. Schue, I must protest the recycling of songs already done to perfection. I mean, our duet was perfect. Despite the misappropriations of feelings at the time between the two of us." Rachel said the last part quieter and red lit up her cheeks in embarrassment.

"Wait!" Mercedes finally cut in. "First, you did your rendition of 'Don't Stand So Close to Me' like the craziest hormonal girl in the school. Second, I could have killed it. But third, I kinda agree with Rachel, I want to do something new. Not something we've already done."

"Now hold on. All of these are valid points, I was just passing out the music because I had extra copies that I found on my desk. But I thought it would help to spawn discussion about this week's theme. I thought that we would help our two investigators, Brittany and Santana, by singing to them some inspired spy music. So if anyone has any suggestions…"

"Nice. Some Bond music. I'd totally dig that." Puck said from the corner and for the first time in the last thirty minutes he lowered his arms to look at something besides his own muscles.

"Or maybe we could do the Pink Panther theme."

"We're not your Warblers. We don't have to do some cheesy a cappella version of a song every time we sing. Besides…no words to that song." Someone else said. Soon everyone was fighting over what song they would sing.

_B, I'm gnna strt a song. You snag the lipsticks while evry1 is distracted. K?_

_Great plan. What song?_

Instead of responding, Santana rose from her seat and walked down towards Brad, the pianist. The Latina and the in-house musician had definitely formed the best relationship over the past two years. As she was the only one who constantly acknowledged his presence always slaving away behind their glitz and showtunes. It only took a few well placed smiles and words to finally get him to finally nod in agreement. Then she went directly to the bassist, the drummer, and the rest of the band who had merged their practices into New Directions.

Brad nodded his head counting out beats and then suddenly hit the keys of his keyboard at the same time the bass and drum came in. The beat had that great 80s feel and had been an instant classic. Everyone stopped arguing and looked to Santana. Wasting no time, she tore into the lyrics singing and indicating that everyone should join her.

_I see you, you see me._

_Watch you blowin' the lines when you're making a scene_

_Oh girl, you've got to know__  
><em>_What my head overlooks__  
><em>_The senses will show to my heart_

The rest of the club instantly opened their mouths for the "oohs" and the "ahhs". Choreography minus Will's influence could easily transition from anything to something fun. The guys pulled chairs from the front row and made a line. Their bodies ducking up and down every other guy. They looked like they were peeping from behind a line of bushes or a fence.

_When it's watching for lies_  
><em>You can't escape my eyes<em>

The ladies brought their hands to their faces and flicked their fingers together over their own faces. Synchronized they began to hide each other's faces in a line opposite the guys and the chairs.

_Private Eyes_

They all clapped once.

_They're watching you_

Then they clapped twice and repeated the clapping on the right beats for every chorus.  
><em>They see your every move<em>

_Private Eyes__  
><em>_They're watching you__  
><em>_Private Eyes__  
><em>_They're watching you watching you watching you watching you_

Santana finished the refrain. Her dark brown eyes met Brittany's sparkling blue. The blonde cheerleader kicked into gear. She didn't have to wait for a better opening. All the kids were dancing and completely engrossed in the song. Their attention on the lyrics and each other. Britt jumped from her chair and crawled along the rows. The first purse she got to was Mercedes' overly large bag. It took her a few seconds to dig through the contents before she finally pulled out her lipstick.

Santana had grabbed Artie. She pushed his wheelchair down the aisle of dancing and singing students to take over the next verse. He belted out the words to the song while Santana danced behind him.

_You play with words you play with love__  
><em>_You can twist it around baby that ain't enough__  
><em>_Cause girl I'm gonna know__  
><em>_If you're letting me in or letting me go__  
><em>_Don't lie when you're hurting inside__  
><em>_Cause you can't escape my eye_

Brittany looked around for something to take a sample of the lipstick. She had filled her notebook for the case earlier that day. Sometime during third period the blonde had a revelation to help support the essay she was writing in English class in regards to the prevalence and importance of felines in books. She wanted to use the Garfield comics as a secondary source to support her argument. As a result, she had run out of paper.

_Private Eyes__  
><em>_They're watching you__  
><em>_They see your every move__  
><em>_Private Eyes__  
><em>_They're watching you__  
><em>_Private Eyes__  
><em>_They're watching you watching you watching you watching you_

Mercedes' vocals complemented Artie's voice on the refrain. Brittany looked up frantic because she knew that she was running out of time.

She took the lid off the lipstick and wiped it on the only surface she had available. A dark red line graced her arm right above the wrist. After she had made the first line of lipstick, Britt didn't hesitate to draw more lines of color on her arms. Even if the color didn't look remotely close to the one used on the coffee table, it didn't stop the blonde from applying one line of color per lipstick she found. And she found a lot.

_Why you try to put up a front for me__  
><em>_I'm a spy but on your side you see__  
><em>_Slip on, into any disguise__  
><em>_I'll still know you__  
><em>_Look into my Private Eyes_

By the time Quinn had rocked the last verse, Brittany had successfully found all the lipsticks in the girl's purses and bags including one that Kurt had. The music died down. The rest of the club laughed and hugged each other. All it really took was one good song to get them in a touchy feely mood. Brittany jumped up from the ground so no one would be suspicious. Maybe they would all think that she had participated in the dancing and festivities. Once again the two spies made eye contact with each other. Santana smiled from the front of the classroom just for her girl then she gave Rachel a pretty rough shove with her shoulder as she moved to retake her seat. The Latina felt satisfaction at the hobbit's grunt from the confrontational contact.

"Great song!" Will said clapping and still dancing a little.

Then everyone stopped.

"Brittany what is the name of all show biz do you have on your arms?" Kurt asked with a gasp pointing to the lines of color all up and down her forearms. The lines ran horizontal, diagonal, lines that swirled around in no direction, and sometimes just circles.

Santana hadn't noticed the lines of lipstick before, but even she cocked her head to the side. What had Britt Britt been thinking?

"Is that-" Rachel ran up the steps and grabbed one of Brittany's wrists. "Is this my lipstick?"

"Yes…" Brittany said unable to tell a better lie at that moment.

"Should I even ask why you have lipstick all over your arms?" Quinn asked before she grabbed her own purse to make sure that all her makeup was still there.

"Art project." Santana spoke. All eyes turned towards her, but she couldn't think of anything else to say.

"My teacher said that we had to do a project which embodied our spirit animal. Obviously my spirit animal would be a walking rainbow or maybe I am the unicorn on the rainbow? Do you think she'll like it? It took a lot of effort." Brittany finished the lie with a flourish of her arms. "See? I'm real pretty now."

Everyone shook their heads in disbelief, but accepted that Brittany spoke the truth. Besides everyone knew how much the tall blonde cheerleader loved to color. It only made sense that she would take her art to different mediums and forms.

"Very good, Brittany. I think you look great." Will tried to bring order back to the class. "Everyone take their seats. Thank you, Santana. I'm glad we got to perform another one of Hall and Oates classics and more importantly it was a song we all knew. I think that's going to wrap up our day here. So if everyone could go home and maybe think of a few more songs for the week's theme and bring them in. We have to keep practicing and expanding our number of songs in our set list. See you tomorrow!"

Everyone got up and started to pack up their bags. Santana grabbed her bag and Brittany all in one motion to drag her out of the classroom. The shorter girl pulled Britt into an empty class around the corner.

"Did you get all the lipsticks?"

"Yup! And I know which are which!" Brittany nodded enthusiastically.

"My bet's on Quinn. You know how she's been ever since getting kicked out of the cheerios. She walks around like she's ready to go psycho crazy at any minute." Santana reached into her bag and pulled out the tissue holding the lipstick sample from Sue's home. She held the tissue up to Brittany's out stretched arms. Slowly the Latina compared the lipsticks smudges and lines up and down. Sometimes she even turned the tissue around as if lighting could be the reason why none of the lipstick shades were matching the one from Sue's house.

"San…" Britt said quietly, but her face told Santana that the blonde was thinking the same thing.

"I don't think any of these shades match, B."

"Me too." Brittany dropped her arms depressed and dejected. This plan was supposed to be easy! "Now what?"

"We have to tell coach. And she will _not _be pleased."

* * *

><p><strong>I know you're prob like "please just tell us who did it!"<strong>

**I promise we're getting close! Hahaha**

**Also I couldn't help myself to add a bit of fluff….that turned to smut. I also figured it was time for a song since this is a glee story. Hope everyone enjoyed it and have a lovely day!**

**Song - "Private Eyes" Hall and Oates**


	6. Hairy AlterCations

**Thank you guys once again for the reviews! They are always welcomed! :D**

* * *

><p><strong>VI. Hairy AlterCations<strong>

"What do you think she's gonna do?" Britt asked. Worry laced every word she spoke.

"No idea." Santana frowned.

Her hands went to the phone in her bag. A few times she started to type on the keyboard, but deleted every message. Every word sounded like failure. During her third attempt at a message, the phone started to ring. "It's coach."

"Should you answer it?" Brittany shifted nervously and glanced outside the empty classroom's window just to make sure that Sue wasn't standing out there waiting for the girls.

"Probably, but unless we have any hard concrete evidence, she's not going to hear a word we say."

"I really thought the lipstick would break the case."

"Same." Santana raised the phone to her ear and pressed the green answer button. "Hi, coach."

"Ahh yes, Lopez, good to hear your voice. Now tell me some good news."

Santana's eyes shifted towards Brittany's before she answered. "Nothing good to report, coach. We obtained a sample of all the lipsticks from the glee clubbers and none of them matched. We standby our original idea – this can't be the work of a glee kid. We've interviewed most of them. Besides the glee trophy case was also attacked although no trophies were stolen. The cases are probably related."

The girls could almost hear Sue sizzling with anger across the line. They had practice with her in ten minutes and if Sue was sent into a spiral of anger right before she got a hold of her megaphone, there was no telling what she would have the girls do. The one time Sue had been so worked up they had done Madonna songs for over a week and that had been one of the only times her anger had been a good thing. Another time, Sue had just learned about interpretative dancing. They had spent the entire night, over seven hours after school, trying to capture Sue Sylvester's innermost desires. Needless to say, she finally became too fed up with the lack of perfection displayed by her cheerios that she finally dismissed them at 10pm.

More recently, she had been angered by an anonymous call into the television studio during her talk show segment. The caller questioned how her cheerios could possibly have a better squad than the teams it cheered for. Quite obviously stating that even a team with a record of 0-100 would still be better than the cheerleaders based solely on the fact that the squad was only a side piece to a team. Sue had been so infuriated that she decided to prove her cheerios were athletic perfection to the point that they could make "doing nothing" look both difficult and yet execute it to perfection. The squad had spent three days outside on the field in formation without moving, eating, sleeping, barely allowed to breathe, and encouraged not to blink unless absolutely necessary.

One girl had to be hospitalized. Another girl they never saw again.

Sue was then interviewed and nationally recognized as a coach of the future by a few sports magizines.

"Coach?" Santana tentatively asked, but immediately regretted drawing attention back to herself.

"Clearly he took my trophy and used it to try and frame me. No wonder Figgins decided not to pursue this case. He's always allowing William to get by with his mediocrity." Sue muttered dark and dangerous across the phone. "Lopez. Pierce. Get yourselves to practice. I will be there a few minutes late. I have to check on something. Oh and Goodyear Blimps, make sure that you start practice on time. I don't want to arrive and see you all milling about. Understood?"

"Yes, coach." Santana hung up the phone.

"S, you don't think that the thing that coach wants to 'check on' has anything to do with our case?"

Santana let out a short laugh. "I'd bet my life on it."

"Think we should warn everyone?"

"Definitely. Some of them are still around the school like that ridiculous Christian club, football, yearbook, and a few other groups. If Sue runs into any of them, we might have to start recruiting new people to join and that's so annoying to pretend to like Berry just so some hopeless person will join glee."

"How many more people who sing can there be in one school?" B mused to herself.

Santana shrugged. Talent had a definitely drop off at this school. She whipped her phone out at the same time Brittany did.

_Q, make sure u avoid the great destroyer_

_Y? She generally avoids me_

_Still punishing u?_

_Smething lik that_

_I didn't say this, bt cheerios isn't the same w/o u._

_Watch urself, S, ppl might think ur nice_

_Never. Tell other peeps bout Sue_

_Yea, sure._

Santana texted Mercedes next. The Troubletones stuck together even if they were technically disbanded. Brittany hit the rest of the kids in glee club. "Get everyone?"

"Yeah. I think so."

"Santana, you were supposed to get all the girls. Did you get Rachel?"

Santana froze for a second. Her eyes shifted back and forth as she looked down at her phone. Brittany always knew. "No…"

Brittany laughed reveling that she caught her girlfriend. "Oh well, she'll find out! Besides did you see what she was wearing today?"

"Were those jellies or crocs? I wasn't sure which would have offended me more, but a hybrid of the two? It's criminal."

"She totally deserves a verbal Sue beat down. I told her to stop shopping at Toys-R-Us. That place is only good for getting those sweet looking decals I like to put all over my bike." Brittany had taken to riding her bike everywhere. Santana had even spent one afternoon with tools her father never used and cussed every word in the book just to attach a basket to the front of her girlfriend's bike. Normally Santana would just get Puck or some guy she could easily manipulate to fix anything she wanted, but for Brittany, she had wanted to do it herself.

"No one at McKinley has your awesome fashion sense, B." Santana leaned into the blonde just for a moment to steal a soft kiss from her lips. "Come on. We have to get to practice before coach gets back from whatever she's planning."

The girls left the empty classroom and started to make their way down the halls towards the gym. They had made it about half way there when a rather loud shout distracted them.

"I will not be told to calm down!"

"Sue, please understand, we cannot allow you to take samples of all the children's fingerprints in the school! Not only is it unethical, but the amount of money it would take to complete such a task would be astronomical." Figgins' voice could be heard around the hallway.

The two girls paused and pulled up to the corner of the hallway so they could hear the conversation between principal Figgins and coach. Sue was pointing her finger towards the choir room. "Fine not the whole school, but I will have William's fingerprints, DNA sample, blood, and damn me for saying this, but a sample of his hair sent to a lab and have him suspended until my trophy resurfaces!"

"Again, Sue, I can't do any of those things. We would be violating all sorts of laws and rules. Besides, I am sure that William wouldn't have taken your trophy. In fact, the choir room has also been attacked. Perhaps you are both looking for the same criminal." Figgins attempted to pacify the woman, but she was hardly comforted.

"Oh please!" She threw her hands in the air. "Like whoever stole from me would be the same person who broke into their pathetic excuse for a trophy case? What would be the point? One of us is consistently ranked number one in the nation and always winning. The other person can only win one competition successfully without fail and that's the Ohio State Fair Alternative Kitchen Competition. Each year awarded to the person who best uses cooking ingredients in new ways. He might not keep the plaques at school, but you know he hangs them above his vanity so he can look at them every morning before he applies Crisco to his head!"

"Sue, I don't see what William's personal hygiene has to do with the fact that you've both been vandalized."

"Don't you see? The criminal who stole my trophy actually took my trophy while the person who broke into the glee club's trophy case didn't take anything! They were probably struck by the mediocrity of the contents and fled before they caught whatever loser disease lingers in the choir room!"

"Sue…" Figgins said her name with a warning in his voice. "Please just listen to yourself."

"Oh I am and all I hear is revenge! I let those kids investigate and since they claim they can't find any of the glee clubbers responsible, it leaves only one person left who could be guilty – William!"

"Sue, please if you could just calm down."

"We are finished here, Figgins. I expect to see you at Will's funeral." Sue turned away and began one of her famous rage walks through the relatively empty school.

"If we can run, we can still beat coach to the gym." Britt tugged at Santana's arm, but Santana remained glued to the wall looking at the scene.

"Wait for it…" Santana didn't budge. Her eyes were focused down the hallway where Rachel Berry had just stepped out from a classroom. The self-proclaimed diva of the New Directions seemed blissfully unaware of Sue's wrath. Rachel looked up just in time to see Sue bearing down on her. The red track suit reared up and screamed at Berry before she swatted Rachel's books from her hand. Rachel screamed in terror and backed up against the lockers to try avoiding any more violence from the cheerios coach. "Perfect." Santana said with smirk before she turned to run off the practice with Brittany.

When they got there, Becky already had the girls running laps with the megaphone in her hand. As much as Santana hated sharing the captaincy, she had to admit that Becky could run the squad almost as well as Sue. Brittany and Santana fell into the laps. When they had finished warm-ups and stretches, Santana broke the squad into different groups to start practicing their routine for the game this weekend. The other half she had them start working on learning specific choreography for a competition at the end of the month.

By the time Sue arrived, Santana and Becky were working the cheerios so well that even the great Sue Sylvester couldn't yell at them. She slipped in and glowered for a good twenty minutes before she actually took the megaphone from Becky's hands and began to coach again. They spent an extra hour at practice before Sue felt they had worked an adequate amount.

"Hey, San, don't forget I have to make those posters and signs for the school assembly tomorrow. Do you mind if we stop off at the store before we go home?" The girls climbed into Santana's red car and pulled out of McKinley.

"Sure, you know I can help right?" Santana drove down the highway towards the closest store.

"I know, but it's kinda a student council thing. Besides I don't think my vice president has gotten over the last time you attended one of our meetings."

Santana shifted in her seat and refused to meet Brittany's eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Santana," Brittany started with her full name. It wasn't very often her girlfriend called her Santana. Again the Latina moved in her seat to avoid the set of bright blue eyes now focused solely on her. "You glared at her the entire meeting and when she went to shake my hand at the end, you literally jumped across the table. You told her that if she ever touched me again that you would find her in the middle of the night and fuck her shit up Lima Heights style."

"Erroneous and hearsay." Santana mumbled.

"San, you followed her out to her car and told her that you were the only person in my life and not to get comfortable as Vice President because sometimes leadership gets assassinated. Don't you remember?" Brittany leaned over the stick shift between them. The car slowed down to a stop at a red light. "Santana…"

"Fine. Fine. So I might have threatened her, but only a little." Santana threw her hands up over the wheel and finally turned to meet those blue eyes head on. "It's not like I actually attacked her. Besides…she was totally trying to flirt with you."

"San, she was only giving me a high-five for a project we had completed together over the weekend."

"Right, well I remember not being allowed to help with the project. You were gone all weekend at the bitch's house and then she was touching you at this meeting thing in front of me."

"High-fiving, not touching." Brittany smiled and pushed back a strand of her girlfriend's dark beautiful hair. Santana stopped breathing as their eyes met and Brittany couldn't hide the pride in her eyes. They had come a long way. "It was pretty hot the way you defended me. I don't think she even looks at me anymore without first checking to see if you're in the same room."

"Good. Bitch better respect me even when I'm not there." Santana looked up at the green light and kept driving. Even when Santana couldn't see her girlfriend, Britt kept her eyes only on the brunette. Eventually the blonde reached out her hand to slowly stroke Santana's thigh while she kept driving.

"What do you need here, B?" Santana pulled the car into the parking lot. She couldn't help but smirk as she thought about the last time they had been together in a parking lot. Maybe they could continue their stakeout foreplay later with a little less foreplay and a lot more action.

"Just some poster board, markers, streamers, and a few other things to make signs." Brittany got out of the car and ran around to open the door for Santana. "Come with me?"

Santana laughed at chivalrous Brittany. "Fine."

"Yay!" Brittany clapped her hands and grabbed Santana's hand to yank her out towards the shopping carts. "Please! Please! Please?"

"Please what?" The brunette didn't know what Brittany could possibly want.

Instead of answering, Brittany hopped into one of carts and turned around to give Santana a wink. "Please push me?"

"You're gonna get us kicked out!" Santana laughed uncontrollably. At the same time she pulled the cart out. Britt giggled and got on her knees. She held her hand across her brow like a ship captain to overlook the parking lot and pointed towards the entrance to the store. "You better hold on."

Santana kicked the cart up over the crib. It sent Britt about a foot in the air, but still in the cart. Oh yeah, they were definitely going to get kicked out of the store. They ran through the different aisles as Santana ran through them pushing the cart at dangerous speeds while Brittany pointed in whatever direction the blonde felt like going.

"Damn kids!" An older woman yelled at them.

Down the toy aisle, they actually gained a posse of children who thought the two girls looked like a great time. For the next three or four aisles, the children ran along with the cart. They skipped ahead and cupped their hands to their mouths to announce the arrival of the cheerleader princess cart. Their whoops and yells could be heard across the store, but they didn't care. The kids would have probably followed the cheerios home if their parents had shown up at the one aisle with scowls on their faces. The children waved bye to Britt and Santana as they dropped their heads and rejoined their disapproving parents. The two girls didn't feel like getting into trouble with adults, not their parents or Allie, so they snuck out of the pet toys aisle the same way they came.

"I think we should take it down a bit." Santana said still giggling. She leaned over just as Brittany turned around in the cart. "You're just a big kid."

"I saw you egging those kids on. You're just as bad." Britt completed her sentence with the softest of kisses.

Santana froze for an instant, but she refused to give into her fears. She wanted to kiss her girlfriend in the middle of the store and she would. She willed her body to relax. At first her lips felt almost mechanical, but she finally allowed herself to melt into Brittany's patient mouth for that lingering kiss. The blonde reached up to pull Santana closer over the seat of the cart. A moan escaped the girl's lips and Santana reached down to cup Britt's face closer to hers. It wasn't often that Brittany had to lift her face to meet Santana's lips. The shorter girl relished every second of the kiss. Brittany tilted her neck to the right to give Santana more space to work. Soft lips met her skin as Santana peppered small kisses up and down her exposed neck. This time it was Brittany's turn to moan. Nails slowly trailed up and down Brittany's arm. Finally they broke apart.

"We should get those supplies before those parents scowl at us for more than playtime with their children." Santana tapped Britt on the nose.

"Yeah, but that was really hot. Are you sure we can't find a secluded place in here? I mean like what's the most unused aisle in the store?"

"I'm pretty sure that if we do anything in here, I would have to share and give all these old geezers in here a free show featuring my girlfriend. I don't think I'm down with that."

"Fine. No sharing." Brittany pouted for a moment. "Oh look! We need to go two aisles over past the fruits and veggies."

Brittany pointed to the signs above their heads. "Aye, aye, captain." Santana pulled the cart back and started to walk with more poise than before. Brittany still smiled and waved to everyone they walked by, but at least this time she wasn't throwing her arms out of the cart.

As they walked by the veggies section, Santana wrinkled her nose. Unlike Brittany, Santana actually knew that vegetables and fruits were part of a balanced diet. So she was used to picking her own fresh groceries, but that was not a good smell. It was almost like a fruity stale cologne, but why would anyone willing spray that on themselves? Gross.

Brittany also smelled it, but she didn't seem to mind. "Oh smells like my great great uncle Richard's basement."

"That's foul, Britt."

"Nah, he doesn't have any ducks."

Santana shook her head. Some of the things her girlfriend said were just too much. They gathered all the materials for Brittany's project and left the store. Santana dropped Brittany off at her house just as the vice president arrived. Santana made sure to give Brittany a kiss while glaring towards the other girl who was shuffling her feet at Britt's door. When Brittany finally got out of the red sports car, Santana made legit eye contact with the poor girl. With one finger she made a threatening gesture across her throat and pointed to the girl. When she felt satisfied that there would be no flirting, she finally drove away.

* * *

><p>Unfortunately Brittany had spent the entire night working on her project for school the next day so they didn't spend the night together. Santana drove her car to school, but waited for Brittany to arrive on her bike before they walked in together. They had only taken a few steps into McKinley before Quinn caught up with them. The three girls had always been close, but since their split from the cheerios, the unholy trinity hadn't been able to hang out like they used to.<p>

"Q." Santana said shortly. She pretended like she didn't like being seen with the dethroned queenbee of McKinley.

"Quinn!" Brittany said so excitedly that it practically voided all the hard work Santana was doing to look disinterested in their new walking buddy.

"Brittany, it's so nice to see you like always." Quinn stepped between the two girls. "Santana, you're always so pleasant in the mornings."

"Whatevs. What do you want?"

"I just thought you should know that we are all at a stage five code red Sue alert."

"What? She was only like a stage three code orange yesterday!" Brittany looked around the hall. Kids were shuffling and making sure to hug the walls. Almost no one dared to raise their eyes. Even the jocks pretended like they were reading books in their hands and barely talked to anyone.

"What happened?" Santana instantly felt anxious. The cheerios were almost invisible in the hallways. She could only imagine that half the squad had made their way to the nurse's office and pleaded sickness just to get out of school. Parents and attendance be damned.

"Just come to the choir room with me. It'll be worth it. Trust me." Quinn winked at her.

"Suspicious." Brittany whispered into her girlfriend's ear as they fell in line behind Quinn. "Isn't Quinn one of our suspects? She could be leading us into a trap to kill us and feed us to her lizard baby."

"When have we ever trusted her?"

"You two realize that I'm not deaf, right? And that you're not in your own little world." Quinn called back nonchalantly. "Besides, I'm not going to kill you. There are a whole bunch of people I could hate at this school, but you two have always been….supportive in your own ways."

Following Quinn down the hall like this somehow felt right. Santana loved her position as the top of the food-chain at McKinley, but without Quinn, it had felt hollow at times. They had built their empire together. Finn Hudson and Noah Puckerman should have never been the ones to topple her from her throne; Santana had always wanted to be the one to bring her down. The short blonde hair girl pushed open the door to the choir room. Inside Rachel and Finn were trying to calm down a shouting Will Schuester.

"Unacceptable!"

"Mr. Schue, maybe you should just calm down."

"I agree with Finn and his less-than-stellar track record of advice. Maybe you shouldn't send us all home yet."

"Rachel, Finn, I appreciate what you are trying to say, but the woman is out of control and can't be trusted! If she did this to me, there's no telling what she will do to you kids. I suggest that you all take a half day and go home."

"What!" Brittany broke from the unholy trinity formation. "You guys can't leave today! I have the assembly. Besides what could coach have done? I mean she tried to put me in a canon. It can't be that bad."

Rachel and Finn looked at each other awkwardly. Quinn threw daggers in their direction. Even Mike and Sam shifted uncomfortably. Eventually everyone's eyes went to Will who stood there fuming. Finally Sam spoke. "Sorry, girls, we kinda thought you were working with Sue. We didn't listen when Quinn said you guys wouldn't have done it. We thought you helped her."

"Wait, what are you talking about?" Santana stepped forward.

Will turned around for the first time so that the back of his head faced the girls. Santana's and Brittany's jaws dropped.

"Oh my God…" Santana held her hand to her mouth. She would have laughed if she wasn't so shocked.

Will Schuester had a strip of his thick greased quaffed hair missing from the top of his head all the way down to the base of his neck. It looked like someone had just taken an electric razor and taken one big swipe down his head. Needless to say, it was bad. In all of McKinley, there were no haircuts that rivaled how bad Will's haircut looked. That included Puck's mohawk, the fro, and even all the mullets from the hockey team.

"Oh cool!" Brittany finally filled in the silence. "It's like a reverse-Puck-cut or maybe it's called the reverse squirrel-head? I didn't even know that people got that kind of haircut."

"It wasn't voluntary." Will growled.

"Mr. Schue, that is bad. Wow." Santana had a million insults running through her head, but she couldn't quite voice one out loud. Everyone thought she was a bitch. She was. She never denied it, but to insult Will at this moment would almost be too much. "What happened?"

"I'd say I didn't know because this morning when I woke up, I had no idea. I walked into the teacher's lounge and Sue made a comment about how I would lose my head if it wasn't attached. Everyone started laughing. Then she made another comment about borrowing a wig next time I wanted to go out. I had no idea what she was talking about. Finally Beiste asked who my barber was and pushed me in front of a mirror." Will shook his head. "Then Sue had the audacity to come up to me and whisper about how I should really consider changing the locks on my doors. She said that she would get results on my hair sample and DNA from of her friends in the FBI by the end of the day."

"Really I don't believe that someone like her should be employed at a school. I mean yesterday I was just minding my own business and she practically attacked me after glee practice." Rachel allowed Finn to awkwardly embrace her. They looked so strange like a hobbit and a troll trying to be intimate.

"I thought you were supposed to warn everyone. I asked and Rachel said she never heard about the Sue alert after glee club." Quinn turned to Santana with accusation in her eyes.

Santana shrugged. "What? It's Berry. You hate her anyway besides you should have seen the look on her face when Sue jumped her."

"S, I don't hate her anymore. That was like last year."

"Well you two are always on or off all the time. I'm not interested enough in your relationship with Berry to keep up. Tell her yourself next time."

"It's fine. I'm not in cheerios, I get it. But glee has always been there for me, that's the only reason why I wanted you to text Rachel."

Santana shrugged again this time with a look that blatantly said 'I don't care'. "Look, Q, I don't care why or who you wanted me to text. I'll do it next time, okay? You feeling okay? You normally don't tell me anything you're feeling or defend your reasoning ever."

"Yeah. I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

"Okay, whatever."

Meanwhile Rachel was still trying to impress on the glee clubbers gathered that Sue seemed more likely to attack than usual. Will agreed.

"But I need you guys there for the assembly! Sue's always scary. It'll be like a game! Whoever survives today wins a prize or something!" Brittany tried to convince the rest of the kids.

"Brittany, that sounds like a terrible game since whoever loses…dies! Or worse-" Rachel shivered at the thought. "—they are captured and tortured by Coach Sylvester for years and no one knows because she keeps us in her basement or underneath the football field in a safe house where no one can hear me scream or my voice!" She turned to Finn and grasped his shoulders. "What if the world can't be graced by my voice?"

Finn tried to disengage the now clutching Rachel from his arm. Quinn rolled her eyes and walked over to Rachel. "I'm sure that if she captured you, Rachel, she would use your voice like a song bird to sing to her. So you'd still be singing."

"Aww you mean that?"

"Of course."

"I'd be like the caged bird. I'd be so tragic! Of course I would have to wait for someone to rescue me. I'll be singing sad songs and then when I am rescued I will finally be able to sing beautiful songs from my heart again."

"Exactly. Besides with a voice like yours I'm sure I would hear it underneath the stadium and rescue you." Quinn gave Rachel a pat on the back. Finn still stood there like a deer in headlights.

Santana couldn't believe the insanity happening right now. "Britt has her project for student council, so I am staying. If the rest of you want to cop out and run home with your tails between your legs, have fun."

Sam and Mike got up and walked over to Brittany. Mike asked, "Hey, Brittany, do you need extra hands after school with your project?"

Britt's face relieved her relief that they were willing to stay. "Yes, I need all the hands I can get and as many of the football and basketball players you can round up before they go into hiding today."

"Sure. We'll see you later." They left the classroom.

"B, we're gonna be late for first bell if we don't go." Santana nodded her head towards the door. Brittany took one more glance at the classroom and then to Mr. Schue's head. "Mr. Schue, I think Sue's spying on us at the other door."

Will wiped his head around to the other side of the classroom. It left the perfect opportunity for both Santana and Brittany to take out their cell phones and snap a quick pic of Will's terrible new haircut. They turned around and left the classroom before Will noticed.

"Get the pic?"

"Of course. That was so bad. I wanted to keep a picture of that forever."

"I'm sending it to LT. He would totally get a kick out of it!" Brittany hit send. Santana had other plans. She hit all contacts and sent it to everyone she knew. Too perfect.

"Can't wait for it to go viral." The two girls giggled, but once they entered the hallway they stuck to the shadows of McKinley and prayed that Sue Sylvester wouldn't round the next corner.

* * *

><p>The last twenty minutes of the day, all the classes were dismissed and gathered for the student council assembly. It wouldn't take that long, but since it was one of the first real student council activities in the past few years it almost felt like a holiday. Santana took a seat in the stands with Quinn and Mercedes. The latter gave Santana's leg a tiny tap. "Your girl has been the best thing for this school since we started glee club."<p>

Santana blushed. She didn't know why. All she could do was nod her head in agreement and pride. Brittany had been a political godsend since she took the office. She had reformed cafeteria policies, forced Figgins to stand behind a stronger policy on bullies – including a bigger budget for Emma's counseling sessions, and had put together a presentation on the importance of unique strategies for marketing and campaigning. Figgins wanted Brittany to present the project to a few conferences – well that was after someone else did the colors on the power point. Apparently he felt, despite the message of the project, there should be at least some discretion when it came to colors in the background. Could she be any more brilliant? Probably not.

Brittany and the rest of the council came out of the locker room doors. The students clapped, but most had their eyes on Sue Sylvester. She leaned up against the far wall of the gym with a scowl. Astronauts could probably see its intensity from orbit.

"Thank you Principal Figgins and teachers for letting the student council have a few minutes to address the general school populace." That vice president bitch said into the microphone. The students responded with a half hearted clap. Then Brittany took to the microphone. A much louder cheer and round of applause rose from the student body despite the fear of coach Sylvester. Brittany raised her hands to calm the masses from their cheering.

"My fellow students, it's come to my attention that the nation has been swept by a fear of something called the hunger games. Here a McKinley, we want to ensure that all people are fed and do not have to participate in these so called games. That is why we will be starting a food drive to help encourage student activism against hunger. We will be having sign ups and volunteering workshops for the next week. Please bring anything you can. All hours and time spent helping us fight the hunger games will count towards your service hours for the year. Thank you! And let's go McKinley!" Brittany finished her speech to another round of applause. Santana glowed from her seat. Her eyes were only on the blonde.

The vice president, Jenny, continued talking for a few more minutes about the logistics of the food drive and the benefits for students to participate. Santana wasn't paying attention anymore. Her eyes were solely on the blonde. Finally Figgins dismissed the assembly. Santana rushed down the bleachers and headed straight to Brittany. She hopped on her from behind and planted a kiss on her cheek. "You were amazing!"

"You think?"

"Of course. Obviously I want to sign up to help."

"Good, cause I already signed us up!" Brittany turned around to link pinkies with her girlfriend. "It's scary to think that homeless people everywhere have to compete for food against each other. Just scary."

"Well considering this is the first service project at McKinley since its founding or something, Figgins should give you a plaque or something!"

"Gross, San. I just finally got rid of all that plaque at Dr. Carl's office. He said I wasn't allowed to have plaque anymore. And that I am supposed to be brushing everyday. Not with Dr. Pepper."

Santana giggled and kissed her again. They started to make their way through the crowd towards their lockers so they could go home for the day. A scent caught Santana half way out of the auditorium though and she stopped dead in her tracks. It was that same bad smelling cologne that had been at the grocery store the previous day. And now that she thought about it, it was the same smell that had been in Sue's garage when they had broken into her house. Even Figgins office had that sickening bad fruity musk hanging around it when Lord Tubbington had been staking out the principal's office.

"Britt!" Santana changed the way they were holding pinkies so she was grasped Brittany's hand tight. "I might have just solved the case!" Her dark eyes wandered around the auditorium frantically searching for someone. It had to be the same person from all of those places!

"What?"

* * *

><p><strong>Oh no! Cliff Hanger! We are so close to the reveal! Keep the guesses coming! <strong>

**Couldn't help but throw out a Hunger Games shout out. **

**Have a lovely day!**


	7. Growing CompliCations

**Ahhh! We're so close! I just want to keep posting the next segment cause I'm starting to go crazy! Crazy from not telling you who it is! Big Big hints in this chapter! **

**Again thank you for the alerts, adds, and reviews! :D**

* * *

><p><strong>VII. Growing CompliCations<strong>

"I—" Santana kept scanning the crowd but students moved in packs and clusters. She couldn't see anyone she recognized. "—I don't know for sure, but I know where our next plan is. And it involves another recon mission. This time into the school security files."

"What do you mean?"

"We're breaking into McKinley tonight. If we are able to sneak into the security office without anyone knowing we can solve this case by the morning."

"Why?" Brittany reached out with her free hand and grasped Santana by her chin. She forced the Latina to turn towards her. Her girlfriend was practically frantic and unable to focus at all. It was scary to see her like this. "Breathe. Look at me. And explain. You're speaking in riddles."

"Britt! Don't you smell it?" Santana waved her free hand to waft the air towards her girlfriend's face. "That scent! It's been everywhere! In Figgins office, in Sue's house right before the trophy was stolen again, even in the grocery store, and right now. I just smelled it right now, but now it's gone already!"

Brittany nodded, but still felt confused. How did this crack the case?

"Okay, San, I understand what you're saying, but how does this help us? I mean it's not like we can just go around the school and sniff everyone out. That's almost as crazy as Sue's plan to take DNA samples from all the students."

"Sure. Sure it would be except for there's one place that has security cameras on it at all times!" Santana said excitedly and paused waiting for Brittany to understand where she was going with this. When the blonde continued to look at Santana like she was crazy, Santana threw her hands in the air. "Britt! When Puck broke into Figgins office last year and copied all the personnel records, they installed security cameras to make sure they could catch the culprit the next time it happened!"

"So you think that there has to be footage of the trophy stealer in Figgins office?"

"Yes! And we know when. It has to be right before we were sent to the office. Maybe the difference of fifteen minutes or two hours. However long Figgins nap was, that's the time frame we have. It's so simple! We can wrap this mystery up before Sue decides that punking Will out of a pound of his hair wasn't enough to satisfy her. The rest of glee kids could be next including us."

"You're a genius!" Brittany exclaimed and jumped into Santana's arms. The blonde clasped her hands around the other girl's neck and held onto her for a few seconds before pulling back. "San, there's only one problem with that plan. Frank, the security guard is crazy! Not even Principal Figgins can get what he wants from that guy. He patrols, but keeps to himself. He's like the one person who doesn't even answer to Coach Sylvester. Besides he's creepy and keeps his office locked up so tight that people post videos of him on youtube like a bigfoot sighting."

"That's why we're breaking into the security office to sneak a peek at those security tapes!" Santana flashed a wicked smile. It wasn't often that Santana was the one pushing them to do the dangerous. In fact, she was the only normally trailing after Brittany and hoping they wouldn't be caught. To see this side of her girlfriend, forced Brittany to suppress butterflies. Hot.

"Oh yeah? And you have a plan?"

"Not yet…" Santana frowned.

"Well that's why you have me. And I definitely have a plan." Brittany placed a quick peck on Santana's pouting lips. It was just enough to make the other girl smile.

"What do we need to do?"

"Make sure we do what we signed up to do. None of the sports teams have practice today because of the food drive. Most are going to be helping with the packing and unpacking of boxes and donations since the community has known about the drive for the past week. Today is supposed to be a delivery day. That means we'll have plenty of time to get into position for Frank's nightly rounds."

"I'm not sure I follow you, B."

"All you got to do is follow the leader, San." Brittany gave her girlfriend a wink before yanking her off out of the auditorium.

It took five seconds for Britt to finish up at her locker and another five minutes for Santana to remember her locker combination. It didn't help that her girlfriend had pressed herself up against her backside. Students walked past them, but none even noticed Brittany's fingers scaling over Santana's fumbling digits as they attempted to turn the dial of the lock. "B…this isn't fair." Santana whispered.

Brittany grinned and slid her other hand around to Santana's waist to pull them closer. "Come on, S, we've got places to be." She teased right against the brunette's ear. On the last word, Brittany flicked her tongue just once right behind her girlfriend's ear. She smirked as she felt the darker skin beauty shiver at the contact. Santana fought to keep her composure in the middle of the hallway. Most students were still at their lockers and lingering before they left for the day.

"You're so unhelpful." Santana muttered. Her words were dark and heated. What felt like electric shocks vibrated along her charged skin. "Do we have time to kill before you're needed, madam president?"

"As a matter of fact," Brittany now pressed her entire body up against Santana's backside. The movement forced the other girl to brace herself up against the locker to try and gain enough force to push back against Brittany's aggression. "I do need a volunteer to help me in the janitor's closet to find trash bags for the food drive."

"I know all about closets." Santana teased.

"In that case-"

"WILLIAM!" A shout interrupted their playful banter. They back away from each other and looked towards the source down the hallway. It didn't take a genius to realize who belonged to the shouting and it didn't take a detective to realize where the commotion was from. Students all around them scattered like bugs when the lights turn on. They too recognized the voice of doom in McKinley high school.

"Coach!" The two girls said at the same time and broke into a run towards the choir room. Sure it was scary to witness one of Sue's infamous tirades, but the opportunity to finally see her kill Mr. Schuester was more than enough incentive to enter the choir room. New Directions had made a pool as to the time, place, and manner that Sue would kill Mr. Schuester. While most people didn't have him surviving more than a year since Sue had set her sights on him, Rachel, Artie, and Sam were still in the running. Rachel had bet that Sue would kill Will during one of their competitions. Artie had bet that Sue would kill Will at their graduation. While Sam had bet that Sue would work in tandem with someone else to kill their glee teacher.

When they entered the room, they saw Quinn, Rachel, and Mercedes huddled in the corner. The guys were against the wall not daring to take another step forward. Will stood in the middle of the room shaking his head with fear and disbelief. He turned to Mike and Tina. "Get Principal Figgins. Now." The couple ran out of the room and ducked their heads just in time to avoid a flying book of music.

"COME BACK HERE! NO ONE LEAVES!" Sue continued to yell. She had picked up a microphone stand and began to wave it around her head like a spear. Luckily Mike and Tina were already sprinting down the hall before she threw the stand like a javelin. Everyone flinched as it slammed into the wall right next to the door and clattered to the ground. They had never seen Sue this angry before.

Sue Sylvester wore a black track suit today. Her hair was unkempt and practically standing straight up. Dark circles under her eyes looked more pronounced than usual. The girls would have chalked that up to her late night hair extraction at Will's place, but they appeared extra dark with the crazy look in her eyes. This was a whole new level of rage.

"B, maybe we should get out of here before she explodes and takes us all with her." Santana whispered and took a step back towards the door.

"William, you will release my trophy to me!" Sue pointed at him with the newest microphone stand she had picked up. It wavered, not because of the weight or because Sue was incapable of holding the weight of the stand, but because she was shaking in fury. She raised it above her head and everyone gasped. She wouldn't dare strike Will down, would she?

With all of her might, Sue viciously swung the stand over her head and then spun to slam it into the wall behind her. William practically lost consciousness. He had thought for sure that he was going to be killed right there. Rachel screamed as the stand connected with the new cover of the glee trophy case and made a thud. The force of the swing did nothing to the new cover, but it did send Sue staggering five feet back. Everyone had expected the glass to shatter, even Sue. So when it did nothing, it sent the cheerios coach into a deeper rage. She growled and continued to hammer on the cover of the case again and again. No matter how hard she swung the stand, it didn't break and barely bent at the force. Coach was panting and drenched in sweat.

Rachel had dramatically passed out in Quinn and Mercedes arms. William had inched his way towards the far door where Sue had thrown the other microphone stand. Cautiously he bent over and picked it up. He stood with the stand pointing out towards the raving Sue like a long sword ready to brandish it at any moment.

"Sue…" William called. Fear and trepidation trembled from his voice.

Like a predator on the hunt, Sue smelled easy prey as she whipped around. Her body heaved and huffed at the sound of her arch enemy's voice. Her eyes locked onto his with their crazy leering. "William!"

She held out her stand in the same way Mr. Schue held out his. They looked like the final scene of an epic and tragic play ready to battle it out to the end. Or perhaps like Highlander – there could be only one! Heads would roll.

"Wait." Brittany pulled Santana back into the room before her girlfriend could run out of the building. "Look at the trophy case!"

There behind the new covering that had magically appeared sometime during the day, the 1989 Ohio State Championship trophy that had been stolen right out of Sue's office stood gleaming in all its glory. It looked magnificent – glowing, perfectly polished, and gleaming on the top shelf of the case front and center for all to see.

"Oh shit." Santana whispered. "What the fuck! Who would do that?"

"A crazy person! Someone who wanted to see Coach and Mr. Schue kill each other!" Brittany whispered back.

"En garde, William!" Sue swung her stand towards Will's head. The man barely had time to jump back and deflect the blow.

"Mr. Schue!" Quinn yelled.

But the Spanish teacher either didn't hear Quinn or he chose not to listen to his students at he took a step forward and thrust his own "sword" towards the cheerleader coach. "I've had enough of your bullying, Sue! You can't just come in here and destroy our hard work anymore!"

"Oh, William! What-" She took another swing which Will blocked. "-Hard work? Seriously these kids don't need a talentless leader like yourself to look up to!" She jumped around a desk and flung some loose sheets of paper in the air. The effect created a shower of white scattering around the room.

"So they need a crazy psycho smashing everything like the hulk every time she doesn't get-" Will took a swipe at Sue with the intention of cornering her against the wall, but the woman step sided rolling to the right. She bounced up without missing a beat. "- her way?"

Their stands came together again this time at a standoff. Each one pushing the other with their full weight trying to get the other person to break. Their faces were only a few inches away from each other. Both held a growl in their throats and clenched teeth. The stalemate felt like it could continue till the end of the world. The air was charged with intensity and unchecked animosity. It seemed like sparks would start to fly at any moment from their glares.

Just when it looked like death was imminent for one of them, a familiar voice broke the tension. "Sue! William!"

The two teachers didn't move, but held their ground.

"Put the stands down now!" Figgins yelled. This time he stepped forward and pushed himself between the bared weapons. He physically muscled the two microphone stands apart. Finally both Sue and Will backed off.

Sue was the first to speak. "Well thank goodness you've finally arrived, Figgins. Now you can fire this hack of a teacher and failure of a glee coach for stealing my personal property and setting it up as a clear display of insubordination and disrespect!"

"Sue, I have no idea what you are talking about! You just stormed in here and began to destroy the choir room!" Will turned to Figgins now. "She tried to smash the new case that you just put in!"

"Sue. William. This is totally unprofessional and uncalled for. Sue, why did you come in here trying to re-break the case? I just had the installers finish the work on it during the assembly!" Figgins shook his head. "Besides why would you try to break it? We had it sealed with bulletproof glass this time."

Sue's face turned beat red at the revelation as to the nature of the glass and why she couldn't break it. "Have you looked at the contents of the case! That's my trophy! The one that was stolen from my office in the beginning of the week!"

Everyone turned to the unmarked case. Brittany had seen the trophy at Sue's house for that brief moment, but to everyone else in the room it was a huge shocker. Will's face dropped from anger to confusion. "What? I didn't even know that was in here. I was at the assembly! I didn't even know that we were replacing the case until you tried to break it! I figured that I would have to pay for the damages myself!"

"Sue, I see the trophy, but unfortunately I will have to call back the installation team to remove the glass in order for you to get it out. It will just have to remain in the New Directions case for another week until it can be arranged." Figgins sighed. Sue still fumed while Mr. Schue frowned at the latest development.

"I won't leave this choir room until I get my trophy back!" Sue finally said.

"No! That leaves all my kids in danger!" Will shot back.

"I don't care what you do, Sue. You and William are now on suspension until we can finally solve what is going on here. After witnessing this little display, I don't think either of you can be safe around the children. That means no glee club and no cheerios." Figgins said.

"Fine." Will threw his hands up. "But if she's staying in the choir room than I am too!"

Sue growled, but didn't respond.

"Then it's settled. You two are to remain in the choir room until this whole fiasco can be settled. I don't want to see you have any contact with the children from now on."

Santana and Brittany began to pull back, but stopped dead in their tracks.

"Sandbags and Sandbrain!" Sue shouted across the room. "You _will_ solve this case by tomorrow morning or I _will _have Will's head. And then I _will_ find you. And make sure Becky runs practice while you work on this case."

The girls ducked their heads and muttered something indiscernible.

Figgins shot his arm out and placed it over Sue's mouth. "No contact, Sue!"

"Well, William, I have decided that this half." She gestured to the half closest to the trophy case. "Is my half of the room and that will be my wastebasket for when I have to relieve myself." Sue strode across the room and grabbed the only trashcan placing it firmly on her side of the imaginary divide between them. Mr. Schue huffed, but had no response. He crossed his arms over his chest and sat down at the piano bench. His eyes never left Sue.

"Let's get out of here before World War Sue starts again." Santana grabbed Britt's arm. This time the blonde didn't hesitate to clear the room with her wary girlfriend. Things got real, real fast.

"Santana, this is real. We need to crack the case tonight."

"Seriously, I think that Mr. Schue and coach are going to stay in the choir room till one of them keels over - dies from starvation or dehydration."

* * *

><p>The girls eventually finished changing out of their cheerios outfits into some comfortable jeans and t-shirts so they could work easily at the food drive. Mike, Sam, and Puck showed up with most of the football team. The basketball guys had backed out after hearing that Sue was still in the school. People and various groups from the community streamed in and out of the gym carrying bags, boxes, and cans of goods. Brittany stood at the center of the gym directing traffic. She issued the guys to help lift the boxes and repackaged food and carry them out to the donation trucks. While she had a group of only the most analytic and organized students, led by Emma Pillsbury, sorting food groups and reboxing them for maximum capacity.<p>

Brittany had assigned Santana to the meet and greet at the entrance of the gym. When Santana had protested claiming that she was the absolute worst person for the job of pleasantries, Britt had convinced her otherwise. Apparently all it took was a kiss and a few whispered words of future rewards to make Santana think otherwise. Suddenly she was the brightest and cheeriest greeter in the entire school. The word 'whipped' came to mind.

Towards six at night, the donations were only trickling in and most students were starting to finger the keys to their cars. Brittany borrowed the cheerios megaphone and announced that everyone could start clearing out after they cleaned their stations. She quickly congratulated everyone on a great job and hoped they would help out all next week as well.

Santana smiled listening to her girlfriend but caught sight of that Jenny girl again. That dumb bitch was standing right behind Brittany. Just because she was the vice president didn't mean she could be all over Brittany. Santana took a few steps and closed the gap between them. Jenny froze.

"Bitch, don't let me catch you checking out my girlfriend's ass anymore."

"I-no-I was just standing here." She stammered, but Santana didn't buy it.

"I've got my eyes on you. Now get out of here, before I have to cut you in front of my girl. I don't want her to have to see that."

Jenny took off. Santana smirked pleased with herself. Yes, she was one jealous and overly protective girlfriend, but with a hottie like Brittany, she had to be.

The two girls waited till everyone had cleared out before they grabbed their bags and started to walk out of the gym. Just then a man entered the gym. He was dressed in all navy blue except for a reflective yellow safety vest that went over his uniform. Frank, the security guard. Santana and Brittany only knew this because they had been caught by him several times after school and kicked out sometimes with a note to see Principal Figgins in the morning for inappropriate behavior. Frank was probably in his early forties and a little on the plump side and still had baby fat in his cheeks to make his look like an adorable teddy bear. It seemed so strange that he would always been so elusive – even to Figgins. He always kept to himself and his security cams in the basement.

"Ladies, it's time to lock up. See yourselves out." He said sternly and began to do a sweep of the gym to make sure no one else was in the gym.

"Sure. Thanks." Brittany responded cheerfully. The blonde tightened her grip on Santana's hand. When they exited the gym, she pulled the brunette the opposite way of the McKinley's front doors.

"Britt, what are you-"

"Shhh!" Brittany pressed her fingers to Santana's lips. "Trust me."

Brittany didn't take her hand away until Santana nodded. She pulled Santana with her through the halls. With Frank doing a sweep of the gym, it would only give them a few minutes to get to the girls' locker room, but Brittany knew it would be more than enough time. At the door she tried to turn the handle, but it seemed that Frank had already locked it. Santana tensed, but Brittany just flashed her a confident smile. The golden haired beauty dropped her bag and searched through it for a few seconds eventually she pulled out a key ring. Santana didn't understand right away, but when Brittany easily inserted the key to unlock the door, she remembered. Brittany had bargained with Sue for the key to the locker room when she had agreed to take on the case.

Had the blonde anticipated this?

Brittany turned around and giggled to see Santana's gaping mouth. "Come on, silly!" She pulled the Latina into the locker room. She then turned to lock the door behind them.

"Britt, that was brilliant, but-" Santana glanced around. The locker room was deserted. "-What's the plan now?"

"Think about it." Brittany smiled as she sat on one of the benches. "Frank has security cameras only in certain places around the school. We know where most of them are because of all the trouble we've gotten in together and plus Puck's been caught so many times. One of the places his cameras can't be in, is the locker room! Duh! That'd be way weird and pervy."

"Genius, Britt! But I still don't know what we are going to do in here."

"Well, as student council president, they gave me all this old stuff on McKinley. Most of it is boring laws and past student handbooks. But I did find pictures of the school. There's an old laundry chute in here that leads to the basement and boiler room aka where the security office is!"

Santana's mouth still hadn't recovered from Brittany pulling out the key to the locker room, but now it was blatantly agape. Seriously this woman could run the world. "Damn. But that still doesn't get us into the security office."

"Right. That's why you are going to go down the laundry chute and get into a position to keep the door ajar when he comes out of his office."

"Why would he come out?"

"Cause I am going to be out in the hallway causing a huge commotion!"

"Brittany, have I ever told you how smart you are?" Santana shook her head.

"You're the one who figured out that the culprit had to have been in Figgins office the other day!" Brittany said is response, but she was beaming at Santana's compliment.

Santana felt on edge now that she knew the plan. Her hands were shaking as they intertwined with her girlfriend's fingers. Her heart was hammering, but Brittany appeared so calm. "This is crazy."

"This is so much fun. I'm pretty jittery thinking about it. So we should just get it over with."

"B, what are you going to do after he comes after you?"

"Hopefully I can ditch him and double back to meet up with you."

"I'll call you when I have a confirmation on the trophy nabber. Maybe we can finish this thing right away."

"That's the plan." Brittany sighed and dropped their hands. She looked towards the door then towards the back of the locker room. "I'll show you the opening to the chute."

The blonde walked to the far wall of the locker room and pushed aside metal shelving which held towels and other accessories for the girls to use in the bathroom. Then she pushed away a small footlocker to reveal a grate in the wall. It was definitely big enough for Santana to fit through, but it was screwed into the wall. "Britt, it's screwed in."

"Not to worry." Brittany reached into her backpack again and pulled out the utility belt that Santana had given to her during their stake out. She matched the head to the screw and after a bit of force, the screw finally gave way. "See? No problem."

"Shit. We're really doing this?" Santana looked down at Brittany.

"You'll do great! Just send me a text when you're ready for me to distract. It shouldn't take long for him to notice me on the cameras." Brittany took a step away from Santana, but the Latina reached out. She grabbed Brittany by the wrist and pulled her back. Naturally their lips crashed together. Santana held her girlfriend. They kissed long and hard. Lips parted for tongues to enter and tease. Their hearts had already been pounding from anticipation and they felt a shared passion between their bodies only heightened by the situation they were in. Finally Santana pulled away.

"Be careful, Brittany S. Pierce."

"Yes, ma'am. You too." Brittany gave Santana a salute and patted the girl's ass before she skipped to the other side of the room.

Santana took a long deep breath and turned to the dark square hole that she would have to go down. Shit. She took one last look at Brittany and she melted. Her girlfriend believed in her. The blonde hadn't stopped smiling and it had only widened when Santana had turned around. Santana nodded. It was now or never. It couldn't be that bad. She crouched down and stuck her jean clad legs inside. One push against the sides of the metal shaft and she was off.

It was lucky she had pulled her arms tight to her chest because the laundry chute was smaller than Brittany had anticipated. Santana felt adrenaline pumping like rapids through her body as she slid along the dark shaft. She broke through cobwebs and kicked dust up, but she never got stuck. Eventually she saw the darkness ahead soften. It gave her just enough time to brace herself for a hard landing.

Up above, Brittany and crossed the room just as Santana had gone down the shaft. Brittany had stuck her head down the tunnel. Even if she couldn't see her girlfriend, she wanted to make sure that Santana made it all the way down. It took more than a few seconds, but Britt could still hear a few grunts and the rattle of movement. Finally she heard a slight bounce of a body onto the hard floor below. Good. Brittany didn't want to risk any noise so she resisted the urge to yell down to Santana. She went back to the locker room door and unlocked it. She was ready for Santana's text.

Eventually her phone vibrated. Everything was set.

Santana had worked her way through the boiler room and to the only other door that wasn't storage in the basement. It had gold colored words that read: " ECURITY: NO ENT ANCE". The S and the R were missing. Sad that Frank hadn't even bothered to fix the lettering on his own door. Santana had moved some boxes that were scattered around the basement to the side of the door. She hid cautiously behind them so as not to look suspicious. She would be able to jump out in a second and grab the door before it closed. She sent the text to Brittany and waited.

It didn't take long for the security door to bust open. Frank didn't even look around. Santana could have been doing naked jumping jacks and Frank would have never noticed. He held onto his cap and plowed through the basement muttering to himself about stupid kids. Santana leaped from behind cover out right as Frank ran past her. She slipped into the door before it closed without even touching it.

"Nice, Britt." Santana smirked.

She looked around the office. It was a mess. Half eaten donuts and bags from various fast food chains were scattered all over the place. Santana stepped over newspapers and paperwork strewn all over the floor. Disgusting. In the corner, a small cot with a pillow was laid out. Did Frank live here? Really they had to start paying people more. But immediately as she thought that, Santana remembered Figgins and his little snooze a few days ago. Maybe only some of them should be paid more. Santana walked up the chair in front of a few tv monitors. There were switches everywhere, but she didn't need to flick them. What she wanted to see was already on the screen.

The screen was black and white, but it wasn't hard to make out the blonde cheerleader running down a hallway. Frank was chasing her with his flashlight. She ducked into a classroom that hadn't been locked and popped out of the other door. Frank followed her, but got confused because Brittany had already entered another classroom. She continued to duck in and out of doors. Santana put a hand over her mouth to stop from busting up laughing. Brittany was pulling a Scooby-Doo! Santana didn't even think it was possible, but the tall cheerleader kept popping in and out of classrooms at such speed that Frank's head was reeling. He had no idea where Brittany was or was going! At one point, the girl even did a cartwheel across the hallway into another classroom.

Santana shook her head. She didn't have enough time to marvel at Brittany S. Pierce. She took one more quick glance at the screen and thought she saw something dark and small run from one room to the other, but when she blinked it was gone. Strange. But she didn't let it distract her.

She rummaged through a few piles of video tapes till she finally found the one with the right date. She pushed it into the video play and rewound Figgins' office surveillance. Most of the video in reverse high speed showed the principal typing at his computer or talking on the phone in the afternoon. Then she saw herself on the screen and Lord Tubbington. She hit paused. She found the dial set to the video player and rolled the dial back so she could control the speed and frame rate of the display. Brittany and she exited the office walking backwards then the office was empty again except for the snoozing Figgins and the secretary.

"Come on!" Santana mumbled and glanced to the screen above. Frank was dying. He panted and lazily opened one of the classroom doors. Maybe he would pass out from exhaustion soon. There existed no one who could possibly keep up with Brittany especially when that girl was on a mission.

She looked back at the display and kept rewinding this time slower. Figgins was sleeping then all of a sudden the screen got fuzzy and distorted. "What! No!" Santana shouted and turned the dial back and forth. "What the fuck!"

Frustration mounted. She couldn't believe that the only footage of the culprit had been tampered with somehow. She kept flicking it back and forth. On the sixth time, she finally realized that a second before the video went bad she could see a flash of pink enter the office. It wasn't just her eyes playing tricks on her. Santana's heart beat rapidly in her chest. That was it! She swirled away from the desk and went to the only filing cabinet in the office. Frank had to have the right file! She flicked through the letters looking under 'R', but found nothing so she went straight to the 'P's. Her hands trembled as she took out the file. There it was. She was about the call Britt with the good news when a certain color caught her eye.

On the wall above Frank's cot, a sticky note hung written in the exact same shade lipstick that had been left on Sue's coffee table. It read, "Final phase of the plan. See you tonight, Lover."

Santana's breathing stopped and her heart felt ready to burst. Frank was in cahoots with the trophy thief and whatever they were planning was going down tonight. Brittany could be in danger!

* * *

><p><strong>The reveal <strong>_**will **_**happen next chapter! There will be revealing and there will be Lucky Charms! These things are guaranteed! So guess away and send me your thoughts and responses to the chapter! It's a little more intense than the previous chapters. Maybe you like it better? **


	8. CAughT Glee Handed

**Woot woot! The time has come from the reveal! I know a few people guessed it! Thanks for the messages and alerts! This has been so much fun to write! I hope you enjoy the last chapter of this first case. :D**

**Special thanks for the reviews! Hearing how much you liked the humor and the chapters has been incredible and inspiring!**

* * *

><p><strong>VIII. CAughT Glee Handed<strong>

Brittany sprinted down the hallway. Every so often she glanced behind to make sure Frank was still interested in running after her. Despite her insane amount of endurance and training even the blonde athlete had started to feel the toll of running in and out of classrooms. But that had been so much fun. The only thing that could have made it better was having Santana there to switch in and out of the classrooms together.

She saw the security guard balk as she rounded yet another hallway. So she turned around and jogged backwards for a few feet. "Come and get me!" Britt called, but only heard a grunt in response.

Frank heaved and huffed his way trying to gain even a little ground on the girl, but he could barely walk straight at the moment. His hand ran along the walls trying to keep himself steady, but when he saw the new direction the girl turned, he stopped.

Good. He wouldn't have to deal with the blonde. She could be someone else's problem. Slumping against the wall, Frank held a hand to his chest. It would be better to take a quick breather before kicking that kid out of the school. Maybe he would even call the cops. Silently he swore the girl would pay for breaking into McKinley on tonight of all nights! Especially when he had made just great plans.

The tall cheerleader frowned. Why wasn't Frank following her? More importantly, why hadn't Santana called with the good news yet? She glanced to the phone in her hand. No missed calls and no unread messages. Santana would have texted her if the plan had failed. So there should be no reason why her girlfriend would delay revealing the name of their culprit.

Britt slowed up, but still jogged backwards waiting for Frank to turn the corner. What was going on?

"Come on! I'll even run slower!" She called trying to goad the security guard into giving chase again.

Because she had been jogging backwards for the length of most of the hallway, Brittany had failed to see that she was not alone. In fact, a small step ladder had been set up and a man was furiously scrawling letters in bright red paint over Coach Sue Sylvester's window. Perhaps it was because he was too busy painting to hear the girl shouting up and down the corridors so the man was just as surprised as Brittany when the blonde cheerleader jogged backwards right into him, the foots step ladder, the paint, and a banner that had been hanging above the door.

They both screamed. The man had almost no time to react. He screamed and reached out for anything to hold onto. The only graspable object was the banner. Swinging for two seconds, he thought he was safe. But the hooks that fastened the banner gave way and he dropped to the ground. Red paint flew everywhere. The banner wafted in the air.

"Damnit!" He yelled and threw his arms around. The banner and the paint covered him completely from head to toe. That didn't stop him from rounding on the body on the floor. His eyes caught sight of the person who had ruined everything.

Brittany tripped over the ladder and landed hard on the back of her head. She closed her eyes and groaned. "Ouch." She muttered as she tried to get up, but for some reason her body refused. Instead she leaned till the back of her head rested on the tile. Maybe she should just stay here and rest for a few minutes in order to recover.

* * *

><p>The lipstick was definitely the same as the shade that had been used in Sue's living room. Santana and Brittany had spent a great deal of time looking at the lipstick when they had thought it might belong to a glee girl. Her eyes were drawn upwards.<p>

SR

The gold letters that had been missing on the security door had been nailed over the cot of Frank's makeshift bed. The letters had been circled with the same red lipstick. Santana suddenly caught a whiff of that terrible musky fruit cologne in the air once again. In fact, now that she stood there, she smelled the scent all over the room. She must have missed it when she came in due to her adrenaline pumping.

Santana looked down in her hands at the file.

It read: Pink Dagger, The. (aka Sandy Ryerson.)

How many times did this guy have to get kicked out of McKinley before he finally stopped? Besides Santana thought they were all friends now or something after Mercedes' song. Why would he come back just to try and destroy glee club and cheerios this time?

Santana ripped her eyes up from the file towards the monitors. Sandy was probably totally harmless, but she knew nothing about Frank.

Brittany.

Her eyes flicked over the screens searching for her girlfriend, but it seemed like the chase had moved onto a different part of McKinley.

"Babe, where are you?" Santana whispered to herself. Her fingers touched buttons that had no labels or instructions. At times it looked like the buttons were doing nothing. Finally the screen switched when she touched a big blue button at the far end of the panel.

The screen switched to the cafeteria. Empty.

The front doors. Empty.

The parking lot. Empty.

"Where are you, B?"

Figgins' office. Empty.

The football stadium. Empty.

The choir room. Emp-

Coach Sylvester and Mr. Schue were still in the classroom! Santana had totally forgotten the two arch enemies were still in the building after their standoff early that afternoon. The Latina couldn't believe Figgins had let them stay. The second thing she couldn't believe was that there was a security camera worked into the glee homeroom. That would have solved everything for them the first day! Unless Figgins just had it installed.

It didn't matter.

Santana pulled out her phone and hit Sue's number. Coach was going to want to know that it was Sandy behind the whole thing. While the number dialed, Santana continued to press that blue button. After two rings, Sue picked up the phone.

"Lopez."

"Coach! I know who stole your trophy!"

"Excellent! You couldn't have called at a better time. I can literally smell Will's failure starting to waft this way from his side of the room. And let me tell you, even our excreme-"

"Coach!" Santana felt compelled by her upchuck reflex to cut Sue off before completing that sentence. That wasn't something she wanted to think about. Ever. "It's Sandy! He took the trophy and he's been working with Frank the security guard."

"That devious Pink Dagger!" Sue's voice shook with indignation. "I knew I should have taken care of him when he failed me so terribly."

The cheerleader on the other end of the line was only half listening. Santana's finger hovered above the blue button. Brittany just barreled into Sandy. Sandy had been painting something on Sue's window. Final phase of the plan? Brittany continued to lay there not moving.

"Coach, you need to get to your office right now! Sandy's doing something to it and Brittany looks like she's down!" Santana dropped the Pink Dagger file. Not waiting for a response from her coach, Santana hung up her phone. She turned and sprinted out of the security office towards the cheerios' office. Dark eyes narrowed. She would castrate Sandy if Brittany was hurt.

* * *

><p>"William!" Sue snapped her phone shut and looked across the classroom. "Get up! Stop slouching. Grow a spine. And use that head for more than trying to imitate a chia pet!"<p>

"If you mention my hair one more time, Sue."

"Oh quiet, William, we have more important matters to discuss than your choice of hair styles. As we speak Sandy Ryerson is violating my sacred space and probably going to pin it on you. And while I would normally commend him for trying to make your life a living hell, it's completely unhealthy and insane to try messing with my trophies."

"Sandy? Why?"

"Does it look like I care? Get your butt chin moving!" Sue yelled and ran out of the room. "I will kill him if he's taken anymore of my trophies!"

Will Schuester hesitated at the door. He couldn't believe that Sue wanted to team up. Granted it would stop the ridiculous stalemate in the choir room and hopefully they would be able to go back to their normally heckling. It had been quite intense the past few days. Yet as much as he wanted for the stalemate to end, he still felt indignant towards Sue for forcing his hand in the choir room. She had no right to barge into his choir room and then demand to stay there. Plus ultimately she was the real reason he had been suspended today.

He wanted to retaliate in some small petty way that would make him feel better.

Instead of following Sue out the door on her side of the classroom, Will turned around and made for his door. His hand grasped the handle, but something flashed out of the corner of his eye.

"What the?"

Will looked up. A rather large cat was perched on the top shelf of the cabinet next to the door. The feline had startled him. Taking a deep breath, he smiled.

"Come here, kitty kitty."

Lord Tubbington apparently didn't take to strangers calling him 'kitty kitty'. The cat launched claws first from the high shelf down onto Will's head. LT sunk into Will's tuft of hair anything but pleasantly. Will yelped from the feel of sharp cat claws sinking into his scalp. He wreathed around trying to dislodge the cat from his head. No matter how hard he pulled, Lord T continued to stay firmly situated on Will's crown. The harder he tugged, the more painfully the cat's claws dug.

"Fine! Stay there!" He yelled and threw his hands to the side. It could have been his imagination, but William Schuester swore that the strange cat had started to purr. A long furry tail curled around his neck and flicked up his face. He tried to bat it away. The cat tensed and he felt the claws again.

"You're right I don't need to see." Sarcasm dripped from every word.

He grumbled. Obviously it was a losing battle. Better to cut his losses. The glee teacher stumbled from the room barely able to see pass the swinging tail. Up ahead, Sue Sylvester had already broken into a sprint. All Will saw was the back of her black track suit round the corner. Great. He ran after Sue towards the cheerleader's office. It didn't take long for him to hit a wall. Literally. The cat on his head hissed as though he was at fault for his bad steering. His nose stung from the brick. But the cat didn't give him time to recover. All it took was some extra encouragement from LT and LT's claws for William to keep trying to navigate down the hallway.

* * *

><p>Brittany didn't know how long she had been lying on her back in the middle of the hallway. She groaned. Her head hurt a lot and her hands felt wet.<p>

"What happened?" She mused out loud to herself. In an attempt to clear her head, Brittany blinked hard.

Again she realized that her hand was wet. She lifted it right in front of her face. Red. Everything was red.

Something white flashed in front of her. She blinked again. But the white didn't go away. It floated towards her. It had red all over it too. Brittany was more than confused. Her brow furrowed, but the blonde couldn't puzzle out anything. Her head still kept swimming in foggy recognition. She needed to pull it together! Santana could need her. Grasping around in the pool of red, she searched for her phone, but couldn't locate it. Santana definitely needed her!

Brittany snapped up. The motion caused her head to spin even faster. She saw the white thing again. Suddenly everything made sense. The white figure, the red, and her inability to focus properly – she was dead!

"I'm dead!" Brittany yelled out and stood up on uneasy footing. The white figure lunged at her. She screamed and started to run the other way.

Sandy didn't know what was going on. The blonde cheerleading girl, not the one that had been pregnant, but the other one in glee was screaming and running away. If she kept making noise then Sue and Will, who were both in the building according to Franky, would know something was happening! Then his master plan would be ruined and that would totally put a damper on his plans.

He yelled and attempted to catch the hysterical girl. "Come back here, blondie!"

When he missed, Sandy cursed. Trying to run down the hall wrapped in an enormous banner was difficult, but he needed to get that girl back before she caused damage. He stumbled forward following the girl.

* * *

><p>Santana had been running towards Sue's office at a dead sprint. Brittany had better be alright or Sue would be the least of Sandy's problems. Sandy had always seemed mean spirited, but never like he could actually hurt anyone. Seeing Brittany on the ground had set something so dark and vengeful off inside the Latina.<p>

Her sneakers hit the floor and pounded through the deserted corridors. As she rounded another corner, she screeched to a stop. Frank stood in the middle of the hallway holding his flashlight and what looked like hand cuffs.

"Alright little missy. I'm only gonna ask you this once, stay right where you are and put your hands on the wall. Principal Figgins has already been informed of this break-in and if you don't want to make it harder on yourself, you will cooperate." Frank said, but Santana could see the way the man was hunched over. His posture revealed that chasing Brittany through the halls of McKinley could be dangerous. Santana knew. She had chased Brittany down them all last year after Santana had admitted her feelings for the blonde.

"Please." Santana instantly switched to bitch voice. "I know you didn't call Figgins because you don't want to get your loverboy Sandy in trouble. Actually I'm pretty sure that I should call Figgins on you for tampering with school property and inciting a feud between Coach Sylvester and Mr. Schue."

Frank shuffled nervously at the accusation. His eyes shifted around as if someone could be watching them.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Like really, you're with Sandy? That guy is about as creepy as they come. Total creep daddy status. How'd he get you? That Pink Dagger stuff? Cause that's gross. Like eww." Santana made a face of absolute disgust. "You don't have to answer that. I really don't want to know, but you should know that Sue totally knows what you two have been doing to her precious trophy. She's pissed and I am sure she's gone total Sue-Hulk by now."

That got Frank's attention. He started to back away to turn in the opposite direction.

"Oh no, honey, I wouldn't go that way. I'm pretty sure Coach Sylvester is tearing up everything in her path that way. Why don't you come here, give me those cuffs, and maybe I'll put in a good word for you." Santana cocked her eye brow and held out her hand for the cuffs.

Frank's eyes flickered over Santana's opened hands. For a moment it looked like he would actually give up the cuffs and go quietly. But a noise caught both of their attention. It sounded like the dragon rearing her head. Her roar shook the hallway. Frank looked back at Santana like he was ready to pee his pants. Then he took off.

Santana sighed. He wanted to do it the hard way. She cracked her neck to each side once before she took off after him. Training under Sue Sylvester for the past four years meant the cheerleader was in perfect condition. Almost every morning Sue had them doing a few miles around the track and then every night was a practice that could last a minimum of two hours. This would be cake.

Once again her sneakers pounded into the floor as she took off after the running security guard. She could see that he wouldn't last very long with the strange limp he had going. Besides one Brittany S. Pierce had already taken most of the fight out of him. Santana's hair flew back as she gained speed rounding the corner after him. Frank turned back to look over his shoulder, but the shift of is weight proved to be too much. He toppled to the floor at the same time Santana sprung on him. They both hit the ground. The navy blue mashing with the jeans and t-shirt rolled a few feet further down the hallway before coming to a stop.

The handcuffs spilled onto the tiled floor. While Frank took a second to recover from the small brunette's attack, Santana calmly brushed herself off. She walked over to the handcuffs on the ground and picked them up. "You wanted to do it the hard way. I mean did we really have to do the stereotypical chase? Have you seen this body?" Santana dropped her hands so he could get a better view. "You didn't have a chance. And now coach is probably going to have her way with you. Have you seen her trophies? What am I thinking? Of course you have! Well I heard that she likes using them for more than decorating."

Frank visibly turned a shade of putrid green. Santana smirked.

"So why don't you come here, put these hand cuffs on and do it the easy way now?" She quirked her eye brow and cocked her hip. "I mean do you know how much time I had to spend on you and Sandy? I don't like to just chase around idiots all the time. I have things to do. And by things I mean a "who" to do, specifically my girlfriend. And if I have to spend anymore time on you instead of finding her, I will use one of Sue's trophies on you. It won't be pleasant."

The security guard had no response, but nodded. He stood up and held his hands out for the Latina to cuff. Something felt so satisfying about slapping the cuffs around his wrists and hearing the metal clink together. She made sure that the cuffs were secured around one of the steam pipes that ran parallel to the lockers.

"It's been real." Santana waved bye to him. Definitely wasted too much time here with Frank besides he wouldn't be going anywhere and Britt Britt would definitely want to question his involvement in the case.

* * *

><p>Brittany had been running from the ghost for a good couple of minutes. She couldn't understand why it wanted her to come back. That would be crazy! She might be dead or whatever happened to her, but she wasn't crazy.<p>

"Come back here, blonde cheerleader girl!" The ghost kept yelling.

"My name's Brittany! But you should know that since you want to take me away!" Brittany yelled back. Her hair had fallen out of the tight ponytail Sue wanted all her cheerios to wear. Now golden cascades matted with red paint hung around her face and whipped around in the wind created from her sprint.

She would have kept running all the way out of the building too, if a dark ominous figure hadn't appeared right in front of her at the end of the hallway.

It seemed fitting that Sue wore an all black jump suit today instead of her trademarked red. Her hair stood straight up and her eyes had only grown darker in the hours she had spent in the same room as Will Schuester. If there had ever been a time Brittany feared for her life, it was right now.

"Coach…" She said tentatively unsure if Sue was aiming for her or if she too could see the ghost.

"Pink Dagger!" Sue bellowed from deep in her diaphragm. She pointed to Brittany. The blonde ducked as if the gesture could physically harm her from 20 feet away. It was a good thing she did as Sandy literally made a yelp.

Beyond the mess of the paint and the banner, Sandy could quite clearly see the monster that was Sue Sylvester. He needed to get out of the school before she had the opportunity to tear his throat out. "Now, Sue, I know that we've had our differences in the past, but I also know that we have had quite a few times when we've partnered up against the common enemy. You hate William so much that you've always tolerated me. So how about we let this little thing go."

Sue's eye was twitching. She looked like a starved wild animal ready to eat its own young in order to survive.

Brittany felt now would be a good time to inform the ghost to run. "I'd go before she kills you a second time."

Sandy didn't need to be told twice. The former glee teacher turned tail. Brittany's eyes widened as she watched her coach charge down the hallway. She step-sided in order to stay clear of the commotion that would inevitably happen. Poor poor ghost. It would make sense that Sue would be a ghost killer since her parents were famous Nazi hunters. It would also make sense why people were afraid to die. Having a ghost hunter like coach would be especially dangerous for ghosts. Brittany narrowed her eyes in intense concentration. Leaving seemed smarter than sticking around now that she was a ghost too.

"Britt Britt!"

Brittany turned back down the hall the opposite direction that Sue and the ghost had run. Recognition flooded her body and she felt all sorts of feelings at the sight of the slightly tousled but always sexy Latina.

"San!" Brittany waved to her before matching the smaller girl's pace. They ran until they met up halfway into each other's arms.

When they finally pulled apart, Santana leaned back with a half smile on her face. Brittany was covered from head to toe with what looked like paint. "What did you do? You have red paint all over you!"

"Red paint? I thought it was blood and I was dead cause there was a ghost chasing me through the halls! You should have seen it! Just like Scooby-Doo except it wasn't as much fun!"

Santana shook her head and reached over to pull a wet strand of red hair from Brittany's cheek. "Where's coach and Sandy?"

"Sandy? You mean that guy who hangs around under the football bleachers? He was supplying Lord Tubbington for awhile! I had to ban LT from talking to him!"

"Yeah he's the one who's been playing Sue and Mr. Schue against each other!"

"Of course!" Brittany pointed her finger up like Velma, but dropped it right away. "Wait, I don't understand."

Santana shrugged. "Yeah, I don't either."

"Coach went that way after him." Brittany said and pointed over her shoulder. They both turned to see Sue catching up to Sandy. But then another body stepped into the hallway. It looked like a very hairy Frankenstein. Its limbs were out stretched and fumbling around grasping for something to hold itself steady. Its head resembled a shaggy ball of fur.

Brittany opened her mouth to say something else, but Sandy and the furry man collided. The crash reminded the girls that the case wasn't technically solved till they caught Sandy.

Sue caught up to the crash and stood over top the bodies of Sandy and Mr. Schuester.

And there was LT lazily walking away from the commotion.

That sly devious ball of fur had somehow steered Will around the entire school and eventually into the path of the unsuspecting and fleeing Pink Dagger. LT had hissed as they made contact and flung himself from Will's head to the banner wrapped around Sandy's body. The launch had both freed Will from the cat's claws and ripped the white paper that had been hindering Sandy's ability to run. Of course the whole incident had left all of them on the floor except for the towering presence of Sue Sylvester.

"Oh shit." Santana put a hand to her mouth in disbelief. "Is that-"

"Lord Tubbington caught the Pink Dagger!" Brittany yelled and sprinted down the hall towards her cat. "I knew he was better than that dog!"

The blonde picked the cat up from the ground and swung around with him. Santana arrived a second later. That pussy definitely got more action than she did in the past week. She couldn't help but glare at the cat as Britt continued to kiss its furry cheeks. No matter how slow or comatose LT appeared, he always somehow got the loving from Britt. One day Santana planned to have a comeuppance with Lord T, but today he kinda did make Will run straight into Sandy. Finally they could end this crazy circus.

"This is your cat?" Will jumped from the floor and glared at the content feline in Brittany's arms.

"Of course! You hired him to solve the case and case solved." Brittany snuggled her face into LT's coat then popped back up. "Although I am still really confused."

"I think we all are. Obviously it's Sandy. I mean he has paint all over him and if you look at coach's office, he was writing 'G' and 'L'. I'm sure it would have been Glee by the time he was done."

"Sigh." Sandy said the word out loud instead of actually making the noise. "My genius is lost on all you simpletons. Really how could they have fired me and you all still work here."

"We don't work here." Britt said.

"Irrelevant." Sandy pushed himself off the floor and ripped off the last of the remaining pieces that had once been a banner. He touched his face to smear away some of the semi-dry paint. His eyes darted to Brittany since she was the reason they were both covered in red. "Do you know how long it took to find a shade of paint that matched my favorite shade of lipstick? I was at the store all yesterday. I must have spent half the day walking around waiting for those idiots in the hardware section to remix the paints!"

"Pink Dagger, you have a lot of explaining to do." Sue said between clenched teeth ignoring his comment.

"This is all your fault. You deserved all this! You were poked by the dagger! And it would have been many more times, General Zod!" Sandy turned on Sue showing more courage than most this close to the feared coach. "I don't know how many times I sent you forms to fill out as part of my taxes in order to prove that I belonged to a nonprofit organization. All I wanted to do was claim it as part of my tax returns, but _nooooo_-" He put extra stress and sass on the word. "-you had to keep sending the paperwork signed as General Zod and they wouldn't accept it! In fact they thought I was trying to cheat the system so they did a whole background check on me! Do you know the things I've done!"

Sue tilted her head up in pride. "No, I don't know what you've done and I don't think I would ever like to. I don't see why you are so upset. I am General Zod in the League of Doom. To sign my name as anything else would be an effrontery to the deep tradition and fear of that title. It would also deny the legitimacy of the League of Doom."

"All you had to do was sign Sue Sylvester!" Sandy threw his hands in the air. "It would have taken five minutes!"

"Hold up." Santana raised her hand. "I get that you wanted to get back at Sue, but why smash the New Directions case?"

Sandy started giggling. No one else looked amused.

"You think I did that? Ha!" He snorted again. Everyone looked around at each other. Santana and Brittany had thought for sure that their two cases were connected. "Sue did it!"

"What!" Sue's voice raised an octave in indignation. "I did not and I resent such outrageous accusations!"

"You don't remember. That's because Franklin, I like to call him Franklin, it makes him seem more majestic. Franklin snuck me into your office, Sue, and I replaced all your protein shakes and drinks with those energy drinks you hate so much. You should have seen yourself. A real Bruce Banner and I don't mean the hot one played by the dashing Eric Bana." Sandy kept laughing in between words. "You went berserk on all that caffeine and sugar. We watched most of it from the security cams at night. Then you went into the glee room with your trophy and just smashed it through the glass."

Sue's face twisted an assortment of emotions. The two cheerleaders once again inched away from her in case she decided to explode. No one messed with her perfectly balanced diet of protein, shakes, and vitamins.

"Finally you passed out probably from the sugar rush. I admit that I panicked at the sight of the broken trophy and the case because I didn't want anything to be traced back to my Franky-bear. So I sent it off to get repaired and set it up so that no one would know. But Franklin convinced me that we could have so much more fun with the two of you! So I stole the trophy back and thought it would be hilarious to blame those glee kids. We've been watching everything on the cameras."

"Pink Dagger." Sue's voice dropped low. Gravely she rubbed her hands together. "You are hereby stripped of your membership in the League of Doom...again. And can expect no signature from General Zod to ever grace your membership papers even if forced by a court of law. General Zod answers to no human courts."

"I would have gotten away with it too."

"I guess I owe you an apology, Sue." Will stuck out his hand.

Sue looked down on it in disgust. "Your hair owes me an apology."

Will took back his hand and held a noise of exasperation. "Thank you, girls, for sticking with the case and ending our suspension early. Emma was not pleased when she heard what had happened. I think you two might have saved me a meeting with the school councilor and her many pamphlets. We can talk about your solo and dancing later."

"Pierce. Lopez." Sue turned to them and stuck out her hand. "I admit that I was worried when I found you two had broken into my house and done so in such a sloppy manner. And then I was sure that I had chosen the wrong private investigating company in McKinley, even if you two have cornered the market, when I got suspended and forced to suck down the same air as the walking hairball of failure over here, but you two proved me wrong."

Santana and Brittany couldn't believe they were shaking Sue's hand and that it didn't come with a backhanded insult.

"Don't forget our deal." Brittany pushed it. Santana's dark eyes grew wide. The blonde never knew when to take it and run. Did she want to get them put on the bottom of the pyramid?

"Pierce, I always had you pegged as a push over, but I see now who wears the pants." Sue half glanced to Santana. "A deal is a deal. Don't you worry. And make sure you share them with your cat. I will pay anything to see that feline attach itself to William's head again."

"Thanks, coach, but what are you going to do with the Pink Dagger and Frank?"

"Yeah, I left him down the hall handcuffed for you."

"Excellent." The cheerios' coach grinned sadistically. "Not to concern yourselves with. I will call Figgins right away and get this whole mess sorted out."

Sandy tried to make another escape, but Sue grabbed the back of his collar. The man didn't stand a chance.

"Do you guys think she will actually call Figgins?"Will asked.

"Psst. I would be surprised if Sue ever let them walk again. You know how she is with her trophies and to mess with her strict protein regiment. They're totally screwed." Santana said nonchalantly.

"Good to see you're really concerned, Santana." Will said laconically.

"Just keeping it real." Santana said with a shrug as she linked up with her girlfriend. "Come on, B. You're so dirty and not the way I like. How bout we clean up at my house?" She winked.

"Lord Tubbington is dirty too. Can he come too?" Brittany batted those eye lashes. Her sparkling blue eyes held Santana captive.

She tried so hard to resist and even looked at the fat cat so contentedly aware of the anguish he put Brittany's girlfriend through.

"Fine. Tubbers can come, but he is _not_ getting in the shower with us. Two pussy limit." Santana glared at the cat again. "Make sure you keep him on your lap. He is _not _allowed to rip up the inside of my car."

* * *

><p>Monday morning, the two cheerleaders walked down the halls of McKinley. Brittany beamed uncontrollably because she had proven that Lord Tubbington was indeed better than those meddling kids and their dog on tv.<p>

Santana smiled for a much different reason. They had spent the entire weekend "cleaning" Brittany – in the shower, in the bed, on the couch. Unfortunately that had only been the night they had solved the case and Santana's parents came home. So they continued their celebration, while Allie worked the weekend, at Brittany's house – on the kitchen island, in the backyard, on the steps, the landing, the basement, and so on. Maybe solving cases didn't have to be as bad as Santana had once believed. Maybe she would keep playing along with Brittany's schemes. Besides it had worked Brittany into this horny insatiable mood. Santana didn't mind the ache in his legs. She could feel Brittany's eyes rove over her body every few seconds. The effect created shivers of anticipation for what the tall girl would fuck her against next and of course reminded her of all the things they had done the past few days.

For her own part, Brittany pretended that she didn't feel Santana's hand tense every so often. She loved knowing the effect she had on her girlfriend. Instead the blonde cheerleader made sure to smile, wave, and nod to almost everyone she saw. It was good to let the little people know she, as their president, personally cared for their safety. Besides the school seemed safer than it had the past few days. Probably because no one had seen coach Sylvester all day, but no one complained.

In the choir room, the glee kids gave them a round of applause. Even Rachel reluctantly admitted that Santana did have a decent if not as polished voice so it would probably improve their chances of winning the next competition if New Directions could showcase more voices than her own.

At the end of the day, Becky ran up to Santana and Brittany at their lockers before they had a chance to open their lockers. "Coach Sue sent me to give this to you."

"Thanks short stack." Santana said off-handedly.

Becky only laughed. "I'm still coach's favorite."

Santana opened her mouth to respond, but Becky had her there. With Quinn out of the picture and their co-captaincy, Becky had stepped up. "Thanks."

Becky skipped off after handing the Santana the note.

It read:

_Pierce and Lopez, I regret to inform you that I will be taking the week off for personal reasons. If anyone asks, you have not had any contact with me. As a result, I cannot offer you my thanks again in person. That trophy was in my top 40. I hope that you will accept my first payment for solving the case._

_S.S._

"Coach never takes personal days, San."

"Personal day?" Santana snorted and folded the note into her bag. "Didn't you hear? Figgins never got a phone call from coach that means wherever she is…Sandy and Frank are. She totally has them in that secret room somewhere on school grounds."

"Ouch." Brittany shook her head as she popped open her locker.

Boxes upon boxes of Lucky Charms fell from the inside and poured all around her. Santana knew better. She slowly opened her own locker and as a result was able to stick her hand up in time to stop the waterfall of cereal.

"San! Lucky Charms! I was so hungry!" Brittany bent over and started to pick the boxes up from the floor. Excited, Brittany threw a few boxes in the air. Charms and cereal flew everywhere. Students still lingering at their own lockers looked at the scene with curiosity. Brittany didn't bother to contain her excitement as she jumped up and down. Santana stuffed some back into her locker. Britt looked up and completely serious said, "San, I don't remember putting them here."

"Come here." Santana bent over and tugged Brittany up from crouching on the floor by the neckline of her cheerios uniform. The other girl didn't resist. Instead she wrapped her arms around Santana's waist. They closed the distance. Santana stood on the tips of her toes. Her head tilted up so she could reach B's lips. Santana didn't have to wonder why it felt like the most amazing kiss ever. Their bodies melted into each other's and the world faded away.

Case Solved.

* * *

><p><strong>And thus ends the first case. <strong>

**I had a vague outline of what I wanted to do when I started, so I had a great time figuring out the case with you guys.**

**I have another case outlined in my head. It would be mostly Brittana relationship stuff, so it would be less campy and more focused on them. Would you guys be interested in more LT: Private Eye? **

**Thanks again for all the feedback, adds, and alerts. They were awesome. :D**


	9. Second Case The Serious Case of Tim

**Hey guys! Thanks for the feedback from the end of the first case! It was nice to hear from the new reviews and to see a few more alerts! **

**Here starts case number 2! It will prob be my last case for this time line unless I think of some more, but it's very Brittana-centric. Yay! And mostly from Santana's perspective. All for the sake of mystery. You'll see. ;)**

* * *

><p><strong>IX. The Serious Case of Tim<strong>

Santana sat calmly at the airport terminal. Brittany had a habit of being late. The petite brunette knew that from past experience and because most of the time she was the one who would drive Brittany to wherever they needed to be. She pulled out a nail file. The baggage line hadn't taken half as long as she had anticipated. A few people, mostly men, looked the girl up and down on the bench. Santana ignored the looks for the most part. She looked hot and she knew it.

Dressed in a short skirt and a fitted white button down top covered by a cute matching back vest and her large glasses, Santana knew she was the hottest person sitting alone at the airport. She continued to file her nails. On occasion, she actually looked up to meet the eyes of a person checking her out. A group of business men actually stopped to ask if she needed a lift, she politely turned them down with only one arch of her eye brows. They took the hint.

Dark eyes glanced to the clock on the far wall.

7:00 pm

Brittany knew that her flight was arriving at 6:30. Maybe the blonde had hit some traffic?

_Hey B. Flight was on time. Waiting for u._

Santana waited for her phone to vibrate. Brittany never let it go very long before responding. But nothing happened.

Santana sighed exasperated. Her eyes caught the glance of a girl who gave her the look back. Santana couldn't help but lower her shades for a moment to give the girl a wink in response. The tall red head hadn't been expecting such an encouraging gesture. She smiled, but continued walking arm and arm with her girlfriend. Santana sighed again. She should be doing that right now with Brittany.

Unfortunately, ninety percent of the stares she received were from elderly people walking through the terminal. Santana knew exactly what they were thinking. Why would a young girl be dressed so inappropriate in the middle of winter in Ohio? No one in their right minds would be caught dead in a skirt like the one Santana was rocking.

_Where r u?_

The Latina had refused to change the way she was feeling in order to accommodate Ohio's weather. She had spent entirely too much time in the sun over the past three weeks that she did not want to give it up for the wintery cold of Ohio. Besides, she wasn't planning on walking very far. Brittany would pick her up, Santana would drop her shit off at home and then there wouldn't be any clothes involved at all. Perfect.

Winter break had gone much differently this year. Since the incident with the trophy, Sandy, and Frank, the security guard, Figgins had wanted to step up security to all of McKinley High. He had gotten special permission to work out that winter break would be three weeks long into January. It would give the school just enough time to install new security cameras around the school and to hire a new security guard.

_Brittany?_

Santana felt weird texting Britt's full name, but why hadn't she answered?

Frank never showed up again and Sandy, The Pink Dagger, hadn't surfaced around the school grounds like he usually did. And when Sue Sylvester finally did surface again, she answered none of Figgins questions, but for the length of a week, she didn't attack any students in the hallways. In fact, one might have even called her pleasant, but that was only in comparison to her usual demeanor.

The long break allowed Santana's parents to finally take the vacation they wanted to for Christmas and New Years. They ended up spending the break on some small island. Santana had begged for them to bring Brittany so she wouldn't have to be alone while her parents enjoyed their time alone, but they said it would be best for the two girls to have a little separation. Santana had tried to explain quite calmly that they didn't need any time apart. When they still refused, she resorted to yelling.

None of these tactics proved to be good enough for her parents to consent to her demands. Therefore she had spent the entire three weeks half way around the world and away from her girlfriend. Of course Santana had tried to contact Brittany, but her parents had confiscated her phone. And the internet provided at the resort had been shoddy. They were able to exchange emails. Brittany had advanced at least three years in her technology knowledge. Now she was at the level of about a five year old and even a few of them still had the edge on her, but Santana had been proud. Although Brittany insisted that it had been Tubbers helping her to get into her email account.

According to Brittany, Lord Tubbington: Private Eye had taken on a few more clients during the long break, but nothing as exciting as their first case. Even before break, the two girls and the feline detective had been working a few more minor cases. Puck had lost his favorite pool cleaning pole. It turned out that one of the lovely women he cleaned pools for didn't take too kindly to the fact that Puck cleaned other women's pools as well as her own. She had gotten insanely jealous to learn the "Puckster" had been spreading his Puck sauce all over Ohio. The case had been solved in a matter of hours. Easy for professionals.

_Britt Britt just wanna no if ur comin_

Sue had hired them to find Mr. Schue a new gel for his hair. When Brittany refused, Sue tried to get the blonde cheerleader to agree to have Lord Tubbington jump on Will's head again. Again the blonde refused. Apparently LT had been too scarred by the last time to ever want to attempt that again. Some of the glee kids, mostly Rachel, had wanted the girls to look into the mysterious relationship of Mercedes and Sam. Santana had been the one to say no. Some things weren't Rachel's business no matter how hard the diva tried to hold all facets of glee gossip. Besides, Troubletones stuck together.

For the most part the two cheerleaders had been working together trying to fill out college applications, glee club, cheerios, and each other. Minus the past three weeks, they had been inseparable.

Santana looked up at the clock again.

8:00 pm.

Another hour and no Brittany.

She glanced to her phone just to make sure it was right. Where could Brittany be?

Finally Santana hit the call button. She waited her girlfriend to pick up, but it went to voice mail.

_This is Brittany S. Pierce annnnnnnd Lord Tubbington! I probably lost my phone, but not right now cause I made this message. So it's in my hand. Umm, what should I say next-_ The phone beeped and cut off the rest of Brittany's voice.

Normally Santana would at least smile hearing the voicemail, but today she only felt exasperation. The phone made another beep and waited for Santana to leave a message. But the girl was far too proud and agitated to leave a message. Besides why should she? Brittany should have been here.

Santana chewed on her perfectly crafted nails. Brittany would have never left her. Therefore she had to be held up somehow or maybe in danger or hurt. Santana pulled her phone out again. Glancing through her contacts, she found Brittany's house phone. Maybe Allie was home with Brittany. But the phone also went to the voice mail.

Alone in the airport possibly made the most boring evening ever. Her parents had decided to stay on the island for a few more weeks. Her father had taken more time off from working at the hospital and her mother had nothing better to do. Therefore when it came time, they asked if Santana wanted to skip the next week of school and stay there. They were a little disappointed to hear that she wanted to go back in time for school to start again. Santana wasn't stupid. She knew her parents hoped that she would have found some other person to distract her from Brittany. Whatever. Her parents were okay with the fact that she was gay. But for some reason they felt Britt was a distraction to her life.

Apparently though, today Brittany was the one distracted. Santana started to pace around the terminal flicking her phone open and closed.

"Fuck this." Santana growled and popped the phone open again.

She started to go through her contacts. All that talk about family and friendship in glee club should pay off. Maybe Mercedes or Quinn could pick her up.

Blonde hair in the crowd made her finger stop over the call button. No, it wasn't Brittany, but it was blonde hair she would recognize anywhere.

"Q, what the fuck are you doing here. And where is Britt?" Santana snapped without meaning to take out her frustration. In fact, she felt relief to see a familiar face.

"Nice to see you too, Santana." Quinn said slowly. She even smiled as if she wouldn't have expected pleasant greeting. "I see you got yourself a real tan and in the middle of winter. Coach should be pleased."

"I'm sure she'll just be angry that I will be throwing off the entire squad's tans. Can't ever please her." Santana responded, but didn't stop glaring. "Now why are you here and not Brittany? Why are you avoiding the question."

Quinn rolled her eyes and bent over to pick up her friend's bags. "I wasn't avoiding the question."

"You don't have to pick those up."

"I was making pleasant conversation. And I do need to pick these up."

"Why? Britt will be here right away."

"Santana." Quinn hoisted one of the bags up. She turned to face her friend. "Brittany's not coming."

"Did something happen?" Santana asked not wanting to hear the answer.

"No!" Quinn shot back. "And stop being so melodramatic. Nothing bad has happened to her over break. She's fine. We all made sure to take turns checking up on her. She came to school a few days during the break because she didn't read the calendar right or something, but she's fine."

"Then what is it?"

"I'm sure she's just doing something with her sister. Brittany called me and asked if I could go pick you up from the airport about a half hour ago. With traffic I got set back just a little."

Santana couldn't believe what she was hearing. Brittany would have been here if she could. She would have never sent Quinn. Again the brunette felt her temper unchaining. "So I am supposed to believe that she would send you instead of coming? That's ridiculous. Britt would never! Besides that doesn't account for the rest of the time I spent here waiting for her."

"Santana, I don't know what to tell you."

"Shut it, Quinn. I don't need to hear excuses from you."

"I wasn't going to say that, but maybe Brittany had a good reason for not being here."

"And maybe I'm straight."

"Good one." Quinn said dryly to Santana's snarky remark. "Just find out what she was doing first before you jump down her throat."

"Fine."

"My car is right out front. Wanna get out of here?"

Santana sulked for a few seconds. She crossed her arms over her chest, but eventually puffed out a string of air.

"Fine. You might not be the blonde I was expecting, but I guess you'll do."

"You're such a charmer. I mean really-" Quinn's voice called back sarcastically. "-how can Brittany resist you?"

"Shut it, Fabray." Santana bent over and picked up the remaining back. Her body language indicated that she would finally follow Quinn to her car. "Anyway, there's a lot more to the reasons Britt likes me and they have nothing to do with how charming I am in public."

Quinn snorted. "Trust me, you two weren't all that subtle about your special relationship even before you two decided to finally make it official. Who do you think had to listen to your _friendship_ during every competition when we had to spend the night in a hotel. Or-" Quinn's voice mocked and imitated Santana's, "-Q, can we switch rooms, you know how Britts doesn't like to be alone. Besides I wants to get my cuddles on and you won't do that with me anymore."

Santana couldn't help but crack a smile behind her sour mood and designer sunglasses. Quinnn always had done a pretty good impression of Santana's Lima Heights accent.

"We would have let you join if you only asked." Santana shot back with much less zing than her normal bite. She had forgotten how much she enjoyed Quinn's dry, but poignant wit. Maybe the Queen Bee of McKinley High finally remembered how to dish it like she used to. "Perhaps you would have liked it and not gotten knocked up by Puck, oh miss chastity queen."

Santana couldn't help but fish around to see if she could push some of Quinn's buttons. Despite a few smiles, the brunette kept thinking of reasons why Brittany would have ditched. But once again Quinn just shook her head and laughed lightly. The blonde's cheery responses and the fact that she wouldn't bite Santana's baiting only made the Latina fume as she climbed into the red car.

"You used to be fun."

"And your snarky comments used to have a little more bite. Maybe it's all that time spent being a good little puppy following Britt around."

Santana's upper lip curled. Yeah maybe Q still had it. Quinn didn't need to hear anything else from Santana to know that she had once again proven to the brunette that she might not be queen, but she hadn't changed too much. The blonde shifted her car into gear and pulled away from the curb. It took Santana about five minutes of silence before she finally turned back to Quinn.

"So did you losers miss me?"

"We haven't really seen each other all that much since McKinley's been shut down. Mr. Schue tried to get a few practice times, but no one wanted to commit to any times." Quinn shrugged. "So I guess you can say that we've been missing each other."

"I'm surprised Berry let them get away with not practicing."

"Well," Quinn cleared her throat to collect her words. "Rachel kinda roped me into practicing with her."

Santana quirked her brow. "Oh really? Like once or twice?"

"Like every day in the afternoon." Quinn admitted with a half smile.

"Wow, Q, that's insane!" Santana rolled her eyes. "How could you possibly listen to her every day and keep going back willingly?"

"She's not that bad, Santana." Quinn said with an exasperated sigh. Sometimes the Latina was just impossible especially when it came to making friends or nice with Rachel. "Besides Mercedes comes along every other day."

"Cedes didn't tell me that. Two-timing the Troubletones for the dwarf. We are so having words about this."

"You've kinda been M.I.A."

"I was on an island with like no internet. It felt like Jurassic Park. I was waiting for the little spitter one to come out and just step on my computer to kill my only way to contact with people in the world outside of the island completely."

"You're not worried the dinosaur would attack you? Just worried it would kill your computer. Nice. Priorities are important, Santana." Quinn turned to look at the girl sitting next to her in the short dress. Sure she looked cute, but Quinn could only imagine how cold she had been walking out of the airport. "Also learning how to dress appropriately for the weather."

Santana rolled her eyes. "Thanks momma Q. Learn that at baby momma school? You're so all-knowing."

"Speaking of not being around, I was just wondering how you and Britt are." Quinn said quietly to not set Santana off. Sometimes Quinn felt that Santana and Sue deserved each other with their short fuses and the way that they refused to listen to others. Breaching the subject of Brittany with the very protective and over reactive Santana could cause a total melt down into bitch mode.

Instead of the initial reaction Quinn had expected, Santana only grew defensive into a shell. Her dark eyes looked Quinn over as if to access the seriousness of the question and the way in which the blonde wanted to bring up Brittany. She didn't always trust Quinn, but today Santana had thought they were actually getting along. To bring Brittany up seemed suspicious.

"We're fine." Santana's response was short and guarded. "Why are you asking?"

Quinn didn't know if she preferred this reaction over the normal one, but at least Santana hadn't threatened to go "all Lima Heights".

"Well, I mean you asked us to keep an eye on her while you were gone. And we did. It was fine." Quinn added quickly when she saw the look in Santana's face. "She's just been kinda weird lately. You know more than her usual self."

"Brittany isn't weird. So I don't know what you're saying." Santana refused to let the blonde have anything. Her arms had once again crossed over her body.

"That's not what I meant, Santana, and you know it. It's just she seems to be really taken with that whole detective thing. I mean it was fine when you were around, but she's been doing stuff now by herself and we just worry that she might get into the wrong case, or end up hurt, or meet someone who could be bad for her." Quinn trailed off at the last suggestion.

"Who did she meet? What are you talking about?" Santana's voice rose with anger, fear, rejection, and anxiety. Who could Brittany have met in the three weeks that Santana had been away? "What are you saying?"

Santana had practically crossed the console between them ready to strangle the truth from the blonde's mouth. Quinn yelled as saw Santana get up from her seat in the car. "Get back! Sit down! I am driving!" Quinn waved her one hand to bat Santana away while she continued to drive the car with the other hand. "Come on, San, or I won't tell you anything!"

Finally Santana realized why Quinn was yelling and lowered herself back to her seat. "Fine. I'm seated. What are you talking about with Brittany? I thought you were supposed to watch her. That is the opposite of watching her. That's like letting her run around and make new bad friends. You know how easily she makes friends!"

"Oh my God, Santana! Are you listening to yourself? You sound crazy. I didn't even get to finish my sentence before you jumped down my throat." Quinn huffed. Santana didn't back down from the blonde's attempt to shame her. "What I was saying is that it's not bad. We don't even know who he is. We just know that she mentions him every once in a while in references to a new case she's working on. Sometimes I guess they go out and try and solve the cases together. For the most part it sounds harmless."

Santana's eyes grew darker. "Who is _he?"_

Quinn sighed. Maybe she shouldn't have gotten involved with her friends. Britt should have told her, but then Santana would have been even angrier that Quinn hadn't warned her.

"Tim." The one word name sounded so large in the small space of the car. Quinn could practically feel Santana's body heat up and fill the space of the vehicle. The air crackled with the word, 'Tim'.

"Who is Tim? Does he go to McKinley? What class is he in? Did he transfer? Is Britt _seeing him_ seeing him?"

Quinn raised her hand to call for a break in Santana's tirade. "Hold on! Please, Santana. I don't know everything. I am only telling you so you don't find out from someone like Puck. And no, he goes to like another school or something. Brittany explained it while talking about ducks. So I didn't get all the details. But it's like some private school and that's why I've never heard of it before. And I can't remember what it's called. I have no idea how old he is. And I don't think that Brittany is _seeing him_ seeing him, but she's just been hanging out with him a lot."

"I see." Santana's voice dropped to an eerily and dark level. Quinn felt goosebumps up and down her body. This was not good. "Thanks for telling me."

"San…" Quinn started but stopped at Santana's glare. Better to change the subject. "I think everyone is looking for a party or something to go tomorrow since we start school back up. If I hear anything…"

"Yeah sure text me." Santana's voice died against the car window.

Quinn pulled into Santana's driveway and put the car into park. "You need me to help you carry your things inside? I could stay the night too. I've got nothing to do really."

"It's fine, Quinn. I'm good. Besides it was a long flight. I just want to get some sleep."

"Sure, but call me if you want to do anything. We've got the whole weekend before we go back."

"I will." Santana went to close the door.

"Oh, S, try not to fall out there. Your ass already looks cold enough in that outfit. You don't need to add snow."

Santana snorted. "I always knew you were checking out my ass, Fabray."

Quinn rolled her eyes and reversed out of Santana's driveway. The current head/co-head cheerleader didn't even bother to wave good-bye. Quinn would be fine. Instead she hoisted her bags to her shoulder and made her way over ice and snow to her front door. Secretly the Latina thought perhaps Brittany would be waiting for her inside, but when she turned her key, the house seemed completely empty.

Thoughts of Tim flooded her mind. Who could this guy be? And why wouldn't Brittany be the one to pick her up? She had worn this sexy outfit just so her girlfriend could be the one to tear it off.

Whatever.

Santana kicked her shoes off. She threw her bags in the hallway. Their maid would clean it all up later. It only took about twenty minutes for her to shower and pull on a t-shirt for bed. Try as she might, sleep didn't come. She continued to stare at the ceiling. Tossing and turning didn't help so she tried to remain as still as possible. It was only 12am. Why had she even tried to sleep? Santana bemoaned that she was too stubborn to admit Brittany's absence made her so sour.

A creak on the stairs startled the girl from trying to sleep. Santana shot up. Her eyes narrowed on the small opening in the door. Normally she prided herself that nothing scared her. At least nothing like being alone in the dark at home, but tonight her heart raced. That was until she recognized blonde hair peeking through the door. Santana huffed in exasperation at her feelings. Her heart still beating fast because she hadn't seen her girlfriend in three unbearable weeks.

"San, you awake?" Brittany pushed the door open further. The blonde cheerleader had on a pair of jeans that hugged her body perfectly and a hoodie that hung comfortably over her body. Santana couldn't help but smile to herself at the thought of the girl belonging to her.

"Maybe." Santana responded trying to play hard to get. Her voice revealed her feelings of dejection and abandonment.

Brittany shuffled at the entrance of the door sensing Santana's mood, but finally she couldn't take it anymore. The blonde girl flicked Santana's lights on and lunged from the doorframe to the bed. "I missed you! Please never leave again!"

Santana grunted as the taller girl made full contact with her upper body and they both collapsed backwards to the bed. Britt's golden hair hung all around. And they were laughing. Santana couldn't stay mad especially when Brittany was literally nuzzling into her neck. The feel of her nose and breath trying to wiggle between her neck and chin made the Latina squirm and giggle loudly. "Fine. Fine! Get off before I die laughing!"

Santana pushed Brittany back. Now she sat on Santana's lap.

"But did you really miss me?"

Santana tugged on the girl's hoodie completely forgetting why she had been angry at her girlfriend. With her so close and after being apart for so long, the dark haired beauty couldn't help but yank the collar of that sweatshirt hard enough for her lips to brush up against Brittany's mouth. But she hovered and opened her eyes to stare directly into the bright blue orbs gazing intently on her. "Maybe…"

It wasn't often that Brittany found herself on the receiving end of a grade-A tease from Santana. In fact, it was normally the other way around. Her skin tingled at the lightest brush from those lips she had been fantasying about for the last three weeks all alone. Blood which had been pumping just from the excitement of seeing Santana began to course faster through her body. This was hot. She loved the feel of Santana's strong fingers tangled in the soft material of clothing yanking her closer and closer. Brittany blinked unable to maintain the deep stare any longer. Her eyes closed softly as she pushed herself forward to complete the kiss Santana had been teasing her with. Luckily the "maybe" turned out to be a "definitely".

Brittany kept her eyes closed and went to raise her hand to Santana's face, but the brunette had already made the first move. Santana's hips lifted from the bed as she interlaced her girlfriend's hand in hers. Interlocked Santana pushed against the blonde so they could be on equal footing. Brittany could no longer maintain her dominate position ontop. Instead the girl slid back to allow Santana the room to move to her knees so they would now be at the same height.

Tongues touched behind parted lips. Brittany couldn't contain a small moan as she felt Santana's delicious tongue run along her bottom lip before her teeth snagged at her skin. She opened her mouth just a little wider and the brunette took advantage. Devious and quick to attack, Santana pushed her tongue inside and ran it against Brittany's own tongue then up along the top of her mouth. Brittany's grip on her girlfriend's hand tightened with pleasure.

Unsuspecting, Brittany kept her eyes closed and didn't see the mischievous smirk San made into their kiss.

Suddenly the blonde found herself tumbling backwards over the side of the bed. Britt's eyes shot open as she landed pretty smoothly on her back. She looked up and tried to get up, but the smaller body of her girlfriend straddled her onto the floor right next to the bed. Fire flashed between their eyes. Santana rolled her hips down right onto Brittany's and hit her jeans button. In the same fluid motion she grasped at the edges of her girlfriend's sweatshirt and ripped it up over her torso. Brittany instantly arched her back to allow the material room to go over her head. But Santana stopped when at her arms. She leaned over and pinned the girl to the ground while she tied her arms with the sweatshirt to the bottom of her bed's legs.

Bright azure eyes shot open as Brittany tugged at the makeshift restraints keeping her arms high over her head attached to the very solid bed frame. "San…" She whispered. Her voice hoarse from excitement and her heart beat in her throat.

Santana shook her head back and forth. Her body still hovered over the blonde's prostrate form. One finger covered her lips. "You left me today, B."

"But I-" Santana covered Brittany's mouth completely now.

"Uh-uh. I don't think I want to hear excuses right now."

"San-"

This time Santana pushed down with her whole body extending her torso. Brittany sucked in a deep hiss underneath the hand covering her mouth at the feel of her t-shirt riding up her body. Santana's shirt had also inched up her body.

Hot skin met.

It had been so long. Both girls tensed at the contact. Brittany struggled now against the knots Santana had wrapped to keep her hands up.

"Maybe I'll make you regret leaving me before the end of the night." Santana's voice hit that low sultry level that made Britt's body flare with goosebumps and chills.

Her girlfriend arched again making sure to rub down. Finally she snaked her way down till she was literally right over Britt's body completely pressed against her. She quickly threw her shirt off to reveal her perky tits and her abs. She didn't waste time as she went to push Britt's shirt up high enough over the girl's lacy bra. Santana smirked knowing it had been worn for her.

Brittany tugged at the sweatshirt again.

She wanted –

Needed to run her fingers through dark hair and pull Santana into her.

"It's cute when you try so hard." Santana barely opened her mouth against Brittany's stomach. Her tongue trailed over toned ab muscles till she reached the girl's bra. Her fingers reached underneath the blonde's body to unhook the bra. Brittany complied rapidly to lift her body from the floor to help. Santana unhooked the bra with no problem, but her hands lingered underneath her girlfriend's body. Small strokes down her back till they reached the edge of her jeans.

Brittany's arched body rocked up into Santana's hips as she tried to give her more room to touch between her body and the floor. Meanwhile Santana's mouth feather kissed the valley between her girlfriend's exposed breasts. Her aroused nipples hardened at the contact and exposure to the air.

"San-" Brittany's breathing hiked at the feel of wet lips pressing kissing against her hard buds. "Uh- please."

Her eyes pleaded as she pulled at the sweatshirt again.

"Not yet." Santana purred against the soft skin of her breasts already glistening with a soft sheen of sweat.

One of the Latina's hands reached to the lack of space between them to unbutton Brittany's jeans. She ripped the girl's pants down over her ankles and tossed the jeans across the room. Britt squirmed now. Santana grinned fierce. Her hands roved down the girl's body allowing herself room to work her digits up and down her tense stomach. Over the ridges of her hipbones, her fingers hooked to either side of her panties and slid those down as well. This time with more pauses as they rolled sensuously over the curves of her thighs and caught on her knees till they were tossed as well.

Naked.

Brittany looked up and felt her body heat up under Santana's intensely loving stare. A loving stare laced with lust, need, and unabashed pleasure at the knowledge she literally had her girlfriend tied up underneath her strong spread thighs.

Santana gave her a quick peck on the lips. Britt whimpered at the slight contact and lifted her body to try and maintain it, but the brunette had already started to trail along her jawline. Down her neck along the collarbone. She lingered shamelessly running her tongue along her girlfriend's pink areolas licking each hard nub on her tits.

Her hands ran absently along Brittany's thighs stroking the soft white skin. Santana dipped her head between the girl's spread legs. Britt hissed approvingly. Her hands now gripping the material of the hoodie tight and yanked at the bed. It shifted about a half inch with the sudden force from the moaning girl. The brunette looked up with a smirk pleased with the reaction, but she quickly shifted back down.

Slowly she drew her tongue down her girlfriend's slit tasting desire that had been building steadily from Santana's relentless teasing. "Mmmm." Brittany moaned and shut her eyes. Her hips kicked up trying to force Santana's mouth deeper towards her soaking pussy. Despite the brunette's own desire, she loved the feel of Britt trying so desperately to get off without success.

"How bad to you want it, B?" Santana leaned forward so her plump lips made contact with her girlfriend's folds. The words vibrated from the blonde's core and sent shivers up the already wreathing girl's body. Brittany whimpered in response. Santana smiled before finally licking all the way up Brittany's pussy with a smirk. "I thought so."

Brittany jerked at the restraints now. Santana's mouth worked hard below drawing out loud moans and grunts. She could barely breathe as she felt tongue and lips seek to extract orgasm after orgasm from her shaking body. Deep pants turned to short intakes like gasps as she felt her body tense over and over again. Her long muscled legs had wrapped around Santana's head so she could only see strands of dark hair as her girlfriend bobbed up and down between her limbs. The bed shook from the violent force Brittany used to rock her hips towards Santana.

Finally a culmination of multiple orgasms snowballed to a full blown yell from intense pleasure. The blonde shook from the orgasm and fell limp against the floor. Santana wasn't done. She continued to lick. Slower than before to make sure she lapped all of her girl's cum. Eventually Brittany relinquished her thighs from around San's head and the brunette surfaced with a satisfied smile. Santana's tongue ran along her lips savoring the taste.

Brittany kept her eyes closed still breathing hard from the last orgasm. Santana slithered back up her girlfriend's sweaty body placing small loving kisses on exposed skin loving the tangy saltiness.

"Hey." Brittany whispered at the feel of Santana nuzzling against her neck.

"Hey back at you."

Lazily Santana reached up and finally unknotted the sweatshirt and pulled Britt's shirt off the rest of the way. The blonde's hands immediately wrapped around Santana's back to pull her closer. They remained like that for what felt like hours listening to the sound of their hearts. Their breathing eventually calmed till they were breathing in unison. Brittany finally got her wish and ran her hands through Santana's hands.

"That was hot." Brittany finally said.

Santana snorted against the blonde's neck. "Maybe I should go on more vacations."

"Aww, San, don't please. I don't know what I would do." Brittany whined and tightened her grip.

Santana smiled contentedly. This was what love felt like. She buried her face a little deeper into golden locks. But a voice tugged at her from what felt like a hundred years ago. The girl tried to ignore it, but it persisted. Finally, Santana lifted her head just enough so she could gaze into those blue eyes. The same blue she had fallen into so many times.

She tried not to reveal her fear or trepidation when she asked. "Who's Tim?"

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><p><strong>Oh no! Already a cliff hanger! And you thought we were done with those from the last case! HA! Silly readers! :)<strong>

**Sorry it took so long to post! Hopefully I made up for it! Now starts the next adventure! Hope you have a lovely weekend!**

**Also I totally just realized that I posted this first segment to the next case on exactly 1 month after I started! Yay!**

**Side note. I am trying to post the new chapter but FF decided to not work. So if you keep getting alerts, that is me trying to post the new chapter and failing! Sorry! If anyone knows how to fix this please send me a message. If not, I will continue to try posting it tomorrow!  
><strong>


	10. InTimacy Interrupted

**And so we continue! **

**Oh man this chapter was hard to write at times. Thanks for sticking with the story from the first case! It was nice to see you guys are still keeping with it!**

**Side note sorry for the double alert. FF isn't posting the chapter. So hopefully it will work this time!  
><strong>

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><p><strong>X. InTimacy Interrupted<strong>

"Who is Tim?"

The question hung in the air. Santana hadn't meant to reveal so many emotions at once, but the dark haired beauty knew that her eyes betrayed her.

The name lingered with ominous intentions. It continued to ring in her ears and around her girlfriend's head. Santana couldn't help but to start jumping to conclusions right away. Brittany's bright ocean view eyes had instantly lit up then shifted to avoid direct contact. Normally the blonde had such an open loving personality. She never turned away. She never hid anything, not from Santana. Her heart sunk at the reaction.

But she had pride. Fuck she had far too much pride for it to be considered healthy. Santana pushed herself away from Brittany.

Despite their current lack of clothes, Santana felt naked. She sat a few feet away. Her head cocked to the side. Brittany's eyes revealed panic. She had seen Santana's body close up before. It always meant trouble. The blonde tried to close the physical gap between them before Santana had the chance to close herself off emotionally.

"San, where are you going? Come back. He's not what you think." Brittany reached out, but Santana batted the girl's hand away.

"What does that even mean?"

"Tim?" Brittany gulped and tried once again to pull her girlfriend back. This time Santana leaned back so she could get off the floor. The brunette reached for her shirt and put it back on. Brittany dropped her head and sighed. Experience with Santana meant Brittany knew it was better to remain as she was and to let Santana be the first to react. In response to Santana's clothes, Brittany remained stubbornly naked on the floor.

"Yes, Brittany! Fucking Tim!" Santana growled. This was _not _what she had been expecting. Brittany's face had been so – guarded like she had something to hide. Perhaps that hurt more than the fact that she had come over to Santana's house gotten fucked and had been fooling around with some other guy while she had been gone.

"San." The naked girl spoke sternly making sure to keep her eyes on Santana. It was a hard task as the brunette refused to even look at Brittany now. The Latina had obstinately decided now would be a good time to open her closet to rearrange her clothes. Brittany played with some lint underneath the bed for a moment before trying once more. "Tan," She rarely used the nickname. By the way Santana's back tensed for a moment, Brittany knew it got the girl's attention. "You never let me finish telling you about Tim."

"Did you fool around with him while I was away."

"Yes." Her voice responded pleasantly.

Santana couldn't believe what she was hearing.

Brittany realized her mistake a moment too late. "No! Santana! Not like that! I mean we fooled around by hanging out. He and Tubbs kept me company while you were gone, but it wasn't anything like that."

Finally she felt now would be the perfect time to get up. Brittany stood up, still naked, and walked up behind Santana's back.

True to her nature, Santana resisted acknowledging the presence of her naked girlfriend so close to her body. It was hard – harder than she let on. Her body tingled. Brittany didn't need to be pressed against her skin to have this affect on the brunette. Her body felt hot because Brittany _wasn't_ touching her. How could that be fair? Still, Santana remained staunchly planted in the closet and forced herself to reach up to move some hangers around as if Brittany had no effect on her.

"So what was it like then? Since according to an unnamed source you've been hanging out with the kid all the time." Santana blurred the truth. So Quinn hadn't exactly said those things, but she needed to know if Britt would reveal more. She steeled her eyes forward to focus on a red dress so she didn't have to look at Brittany's face. It would hurt too much.

"Who have you been talking to?" Brittany asked genuinely. "Because I specifically took away my diaries from Lord Tubbington's reading list. And to be on the safe side I hid his reading glasses. He's been very angry at me for that, so if you heard anything from him don't trust him! He's totally blackmailing me. Besides I had to cut him off the Lucky Charms. The vet said that I couldn't keep giving him marshmallows for all his meals after I took him in after the two times he passed out during break and didn't wake up for a few days. So if Lord T was sending you messages or-"

"It was Quinn! Not Lord Tubbs!" Santana cut the girl off.

"Oh." Brittany hung her head again for a moment as if to think of a response or perhaps to question why Quinn would have said something. "San, I don't know what Quinn told you, but she wasn't around during all of break so how would she know what Tim and I were doing."

"So you were doing something then?"

"San," Brittany moved forward and reached out tentatively for Santana's hip. At first the girl tried to pull away, but Brittany made sure she had a firm grasp before wrapping her arm around Santana's waist. "All we were doing was solving mysteries. Without school in session at McKinley, there were like no requests for help. I even went in a few times to make sure Figgins didn't need LT and I to take a few sniffs around the school for any clues or foul play."

"Quinn said the glee kids found you wandering lost in McKinley a few times."

"Lost? We were looking for bad guys. You never know. The Pink Dagger or Frank could have come back or something. We were making sure everything was safe."

Brittany smiled as she felt Santana let go. The girl's body finally relaxed into Brittany's arm.

"So about this Tim guy…"

"Don't worry, Santana, you're my everything. Besides why would I be getting with anyone when you can do all those lovely things you just did to me on the floor over there." Brittany's grip tightened just enough to encourage Santana to lean back towards her girlfriend.

"I am pretty awesome."

"Duh. I've known that forever now." Again the blonde moved forward just a little. Just enough to break down more of Santana's defenses. She pursed her lips against the tanned skin of Santana's neckline right above the collarbone. Santana tensed for a split second, but Brittany maintained her position. She neither moved her lips away from the spot nor became aggressive. This was a single kiss of love meant to calm her girlfriend down.

"Whatever." Santana bristled at the contact, but didn't pull away. She hated admitting the effect Brittany had on her.

"I met him at the park one day when I was too bored to do one of my podcasts. There was a little girl lost trying to find her mom. I was about to offer to help since I've been lost so many times in the park, but he beat me to talking to her. It took him like five minutes to find her mom. I kept thinking I would have to talk to him about taking potential customers away from our business. You know, get all gang style on the playground turf." Brittany paused for a moment to assess Santana's mood, but her body language, though guard, still hadn't pulled away. "Instead he came up to me afterwards and stuck out his head. He said his name was Tim and that he had seen our posters around. He had asked around his school about me. One of his classmates said that he used to live near me and told him I liked to hang in the park."

"So he was stalking you?" Santana grumbled. The situation might have changed, but this Tim character seemed way more suspicious than Brittany felt about him.

"No, silly, he just wanted to see if he could become a partner in LT: P-EYE." Brittany laughed lightly and gave Satana's neck another light kiss.

"A partner? Like work with us? And I haven't even met him? And what is LT:P-EYE? It sounds like some type of robot from like Star Wars or Star Trek or whatever one had the little thing that made all the noises." Santana smiled sweetly for a moment. She loved when Brittany would come up with the cutest things to say or call things.

"Oh! That's like our trademark or something. Tim said that we need to have a brand name so we can like stamp it on our cattle to prevent other people from stealing our ideas. I was a little confused about the whole thing and what it had to do with cows, but if I can dress up like a cowgirl that would be hot right?" Brittany kept talking clearly excited about Tim's idea. "I could even get boots! I wanted to ask if you if that means we should get tattoos that say LT: P-EYE like so we would be trademarked too! Wouldn't that be cool? It would be like we belonged to each other. I thought maybe we could even get Lord Tubbington one."

Brittany went to kiss Santana again, but a hand rejected her advances immediately. Santana finally spun around to face her girlfriend. Her eyes bristled with annoyance at Brittany's mood and reaction when it came to talking about this Tim. Who the fuck did he think he was?

"Sounds lame and I would _not _share a tatt design with LT and especially not with some punk." Santana bit back. Her harsh words put Britt out a little. She didn't even try to close the distance between them again. All that hard work to calm Santana down had been completely erased. That didn't mean she was giving up, it just meant a different tactic. "Did _Tim-_," Santana's voice dripped with venom, "-also plan on getting a matching tattoo with us and LT?"

Her dark eyes were flashing with anger. Unfortunately they were also drawn down towards Brittany's quite naked, but quite lovely chest. She couldn't remain furious if she had to keep looking at her girlfriend's perfect body. Before Brittany could respond, Santana whirled around to the closet. It took only a second for her to find an old McKinley High School sweatshirt. She threw it at the blonde while saying, "And please put something on! You are so distracting."

Brittany smiled pleased that she had been able to break the tension for a few moments. She was even more pleased to know that Santana still couldn't resist her. It only took a few seconds, but she popped the sweatshirt on and instantly fell in the smell of Santana's room - lingering perfume, the smell of the house, and her laundry detergent.

She pulled herself out of the comfort of her girlfriend's clothes back to answer the question about Tim. "Nope. He's too body conscious. He's always talking about how he must maintain his perfect figure or something like that. So he can't risk permanent marks yet. Even running around with me and Lord T is a risk. What if he falls and scars or something?"

Santana laughed. This guy sounded like a total wuss! Actually what he sounded like was Kurt. Perfect. What did she have to worry about if some gay kid from another school wanted to hang with her perfect girlfriend? Not a big deal. Quinn had said Tim went to some private school. Hell, he was probably one of Blaine's old buddies from the Warblers or something lame like that. Her voice revealed her relief. "So he's gay?"

"What?" Brittany cocked her head.

"He's gay. This Tim guy, he definitely has to be gay or at least you make him sound like that. Do you guys paint each other's nails? Has Kurt met him or Blaine? Maybe we can see the three boys fight over each other." Santana quickly rattled off questions and possibilities to compensate for the anxiety Brittany and this Tim had put her through.

"No, no one's met him." Brittany said slowly unsure how Santana had come to that conclusion. "I mean…I guess he could be gay. I just never thought so because he's always surrounded by girls. Sometimes he has to push through a whole bunch of them at his lacrosse games just to come talk to me. That's when we normally have time to go mystery hunting."

Santana's good mood instantly vanished and her face dropped. Who was this asshole?

"I see. So he's good looking, probably not gay, plays lacrosse-"

"-oh and he swims or dives or something. He told me once when we were at the frozen pond at the park."

Santana contained herself from growling at all the extra information Brittany felt the need to keep giving her. Three weeks! It had only been three weeks.

"My bad-" Again her voice sounded like acid as Santana continued to list all the many _wonderful_ things about Tim. "-he swims too, cares about his looks, makes up a trademark for _our_ business, and he is now a partner solving crimes for Lord Tubbington: Private Eye. Oh! Wait I mean LT: P-EYE."

Brittany could sense that Santana was pissed, but since her other tactic had failed, Brittany had to just keep going on this new path. She nodded enthusiastically at the list not changing her demeanor to acknowledge the fact her girlfriend looked ready to blow smoke from her nostrils.

"San, he's fine. Besides he's not going to be around all that often now that his agent found him a gig for a commercial or something. He didn't have a lot of details when he talked to me today. That's why I called Quinn. He was kinda like saying good-bye to me or something. Just that he couldn't hang out with me every day like we had been doing. I didn't realize what time it was. You know how I am with time." Britt shrugged her shoulders. Her blue eyes were crystal clear as she looked for some sign of forgiveness or acceptance from her girlfriend.

Santana remained aloof. "So you were just talking to him instead of picking your girlfriend up at the airport? The same girlfriend you haven't seen in three weeks? Really, Britt? That's so fucking great. Makes me feel awesome."

Brittany dropped her head and pouted for a moment. She hadn't meant to lost track of time, but she did feel terrible when she had to beg Quinn to make the trip to the airport. "He was talking alot I felt bad cause he said he wouldn't be around as much."

Santana wasn't done though. Her voice continue to rise in anger revealing how hurt she had been at the airport. Brittany knew she had messed up. "And he has an agent? What is this guy like fucking superman?"

"Maybe! I can ask him next time I see him."

"Whoa! Hold up there, Britt." Santana raised her hand and narrowed her eyes. "I'm not sure I want you to be hanging out with this Tim guy. He sounds suspicious. How can all that stuff be true? When did he say he'll be around again?"

Again Brittany shifted at the questions and observations. "San, I know you want to protect me, but he's not a bad guy. He's been helping me catch the bad guys. I don't know when I'll see him again. Normally he texts me. Mostly we meet up at the park. But, Santana, I don't know if it's a good idea that you two meet each other."

Santana bristled at Brittany's admission. "What do you mean?" Her eyes narrowed even further. Her arms crossed over her chest.

"Well I mean I talked about you all the time. He asked about you a lot actually. I told him how upset I was that you were on this island in like the middle of Asia and how I couldn't get in contact with you except through emails every few days. I told him how awesome you were!" Brittany smiled trying to get Santana to smile back. The brunette continued to glare. So the girl scrunched her face to the side and continued talking. "I told Tim that he needed to meet you when you came back so he could see how awesome my girlfriend was for himself."

"So why can't I meet him?"

"Well after I told him all these great stories about you, I think he might have gotten nervous or something about meeting you."

"What stories?"

"Like all of them?" Brittany flashed a guilty smile. "Like how you ran down Frank or beat up Quinn that one time. All the times you've defended glee with your razor hair or even all those times you've gone to duel it out with other people."

"Well at least he's scared of me." Santana huffed, but it did little to assuage her concern about this Tim guy.

"Totally! I told him how you go all badass Lima Heights on people if you don't like them. And how you're so good with your tongue and how-"

Santana raised her hand again to stop Brittany from talking. "Why are you telling him about our sex life? I mean, I know it's hot and sexy, but I don't think I want some guy I don't even know hearing about my good my tongue is."

Brittany laughed and took another step towards Santana. The first step since her girlfriend had pushed her back. Again Brittany began the soft and slow work of breaking down the walls her love spent so much time and effort throwing up when she felt vulnerable. "You wish I was praising your ladylovemaking skills to everyone. You'd love that. Don't deny it, but I was talking about your vicious vicious words."

A slight tinge of red lit in Santana's cheeks as Brittany called her out. It wasn't often the Latina blushed. The blonde took another step towards her, but she didn't shrink back. Instead Santana closed the gap herself by leaning forward, the official signal Santana could now be approached.

This was the longest she had been mad at Brittany since they had decided to make their relationship official. All she had to do was keep reminding herself that it was warranted. Brittany had hurt her. Maybe she had jumped the gun a little, but it was definitely hard to admit when she was wrong. Somehow, in this moment when Santana had been the one to attack Brittany, Brittany still made it so easy to mold back into their relationship.

"You talked about me a lot then?"

"Talked about you. Thought about you. I made you a whole collection of pictures about us. Allie had to buy me a new pack of crayons. I think even Lord Tubbington missed you." Brittany took one more step towards the half-naked girl standing by the vanity next to closet.

"Doubtful. I'm sure he was dancing on a mountain of cheese performing some weird cat ritual to curse my soul in the afterlife. Probably the most exercise he's gotten in months and all because he thought I was dead or marooned on some island."

"I don't think he thought you turned into a color, babe." Brittany smirked as she finally stepped into Santana's personal space.

Santana heart skipped a beat at the last part of those words. _Babe._ She just loved the sound of the utter love and possessive nature of the word. It revealed tenderness on that deep personal level which Santana had only just opened up in her relationship with her best friend. The feel of Brittany's hands tugging on her t-shirt finally collapsed the rest of her walls. Brittany moved forward and leaned down into the kiss.

A hand reached back to grasp the edge of the vanity for support as Brittany pressed her whole body flush against Santana's body. A long strong arm wrapped firmly against her waist once more except this time Santana didn't dare to push it away. Instead she moaned into the kiss and arched her back. Brittany's long leg slid between tanned one spreading them apart against the wood of the vanity.

"B…" Santana whispered as she could barely pull back from the kiss. Already her body demanded more. Those blue eyes staring straight through her always ignited something so deep within her. "Don't think I'm going to let this Tim guy slide through and try to steal my girl."

Brittany couldn't help but smile into another kiss before responding. Every word brushed up and down against skin their lips were still connected. "Of course. And that's why you're my Santana. I'm still your girl. Some silly boy isn't going to change that."

Santana held her gaze before finally nodding. Their lips met again. Brittany's leg slid further between Santana's. The blonde's thigh set firmly up against her girlfriend's naked pussy. Santana moaned as she hooked her arms around Britt's neck. Her ass lifted to the edge of vanity so gain a better angle to grind on the limb moving between her legs. A soft moan escaped her lips through their kiss. Brittany pulled back and licked her lips slowly before biting her bottom lip. She looked the moaning girl straddling her leg up and down. Her own pussy was hot and wet from watching the Latina ride up her thigh. Santana lunged up and grabbed onto the front of Brittany's sweatshirt with one hand; the other hand ran through blonde hair. Their mouths collided once more.

Thrown off balance, Brittany threw out her hand to the glass mirror behind Santana in order to keep herself steady. It would be a long night. They still had quite a few things to _talk _about.

* * *

><p>The next morning the two girls woke up naked tangled in a mess of clothes haphazardly clutched at from the closet then thrown to the floor, sheets that had been torn from the bed, and what had to be one of the curtains from Santana's bedroom window. For some reason the rod had been needed last night. It lay a few feet away from where the girls were sleeping strewn in their nest of materials. The brass rod definitely had signs of use and foul play on it. As did most of the objects and surfaces around Santana's room.<p>

Santana had fallen asleep on the floor. Her hands had grabbed a handful of the various materials to block out the sun which now could stream unhindered by the curtain through her room. She knew Brittany was close by because she felt so warm. Limbs were arbitrarily draped over other body parts.

She didn't want to move. Her whole body felt dead. Exhausted from last night's activities, the two girls had passed out. It didn't look like they would be getting up anytime soon that was until Santana's bedroom door creaked open.

"Ay! Madre de Dios!" A voice crackled through the room. Santana groggily opened her eyes and lifted what felt like a bra, a t-shirt, and one boot from her face. She squinted at the light and moaned.

"Wha?"

"Oh your parents would kill me if they knew of the things you and Miss Brittany did while they were away!"

"Please please, Mariska, no guilt trips this early in the morning."

"Morning!" The plump women moved through the room making sure to not look at the naked bodies on the floor only decently covered because of the mess of clothing on top of them. "It is two in the afternoon! You've been sleeping all day and making the biggest mess of your room!"

"It's fine, Mar, we can clean up later."

"Clean up later?" The woman shoved some clothes into a hamper. "Your parents would kill me if they knew."

"They already know. I told them remember?"

"Oh not about you and Brittany! Good heavens you two are the cutest couple. Although I admit I think it broke my grandson, Francisco, and his poor heart to hear that he could no longer try to court you. I thought you two would have made the sweetest couple. He needs a good strong woman like yourself, but Miss Brittany is more than capable of handling you." Mariska continued to move about the room talking about everything. Santana groaned again and pulled the t-shirt back over her eyes. She loved the maid, but really last night had been exhausting. "If your parents knew I let you have these slumber parties, what would they think?"

"Nothing. They wouldn't think anything of it because they would have to care first. And second they would have to be back on this side of the world."

"You know they care, honey."

"Whatever."

"Don't you whatever me, Tanita! Now where is that Brittany? I imagine she would have to be under this mess somewhere." Mariska picked up the comforter and placed it on the bed, but still didn't find the blonde. "I'm making pancakes. I know she loves those."

Suddenly the mound of clothes, the curtain, and all the other things from Santana's room that had covered the brunette's stomach shifted. Brittany's head popped up out of the pile from between Santana's legs. Mariska put a hand to heart and made a quick sign of the cross before she exited the room muttering something else in Spanish.

"Pancakes?"

Santana lifted her torso to look down at the blonde now smiling between her legs. Last night had been good.

"What you couldn't find anything else better to eat while you were down there?" She smirked.

Brittany waited for a half second before she went back beneath the clothing. Santana's body jerked. The feel of wet tongue between her legs had shocked her system. She had not been expecting that and now her body tingled unsure how to react. Brittany didn't give her any time to enjoy the invasion as she popped back up. "Not as good as pancakes!"

"Hey!" Santana playfully growled and kicked at Britt. The two rolled around for a few minutes before they finally grabbed articles of random outfits and got dressed. They walked downstairs hand and hand to the smell of a delicious breakfast almost done cook. Mariska was at the stove cooking bacon. Pancakes were already on the table. They both went right to the water and chugged a few glasses before they were ready to start digging in.

* * *

><p>After breakfast Brittany got a call from Allie saying that she would need her to come into work to help with some filing. Apparently Allie had also been concerned by Brittany's lack of activities and had convinced her boss to hire her sister for some paperwork. Santana couldn't help but beam. Her girl had been busy and making bank while she had been on that island. Santana offered to drive Brittany to the hospital. Besides she had needed to drop something off for her father anyway.<p>

Santana drove all the way to the hospital. Allie stood outside the ER waiting for them in her scrubs. Brittany gave her sister a hug. San waved bye to them as they started down the hallway towards the opposite end of the hospital, but Brittany ran back to give her girl one last kiss. Santana blushed.

"Pick me up later?" Brittany asked swinging Santana's hands back and forth.

"Of course. Maybe we can even have a date or something."

"That sounds awesome. Breaksticks?"

"Sure."

"Oh! Allie wanted to know if you could swing by the house and drop this off for her? Just put it anywhere. Also could you feed Lord Tubbington?" Brittany batted those eye lashes.

"I guess. As long as he doesn't attack me."

"He won't if you're really nice to him."

"This is going to be a problem."

Brittany didn't respond. She gave Santana one last kiss before running back down the hall to Allie. For a brief moment Santana and Allie made eye contact. Maybe they could be friends or something. The whole situation was strange anyway with Brittany living with her sister. Santana shrugged. It didn't matter. As long as she could be with Brittany, why should she care about what her sister thought? And yet no matter how many times Santana told herself that, she still felt happy whenever Allie acknowledged her. She turned back down the hall to find her father's office.

* * *

><p>Santana pulled up to Brittany's house not that long after she had dropped off her packages for her father. She was about the get out of the car when her phone vibrated.<p>

_Hey plans not wrkin fo 2nite._

It was from Quinn.

_What no party?_

_Got busted._

_It's like 3pm. How it get busted?_

_Parents._

_Lame. Glad mine are on the other side of the world. Keep me posted._

Santana shut her phone and got out of her car. Luckily she was dressed appropriately today or at least dressed. She hadn't changed from the assortment of clothes she had thrown on. Sweat pants, a scarf or two, mismatched boots and so on, Santana would have made fun of herself relentlessly. After last night though she couldn't care.

At least she wasn't freezing today.

She made it halfway up the driveway when she spotted something on the front steps. It was colorful and bright. Upon closer inspection, Santana realized it was a bouquet of flowers. No, not just a bouquet of flowers these were colors of every variety like a rainbow.

"What?" Santana mumbled to herself. She didn't know that Allie was dating again. Hopefully it would be a girl this time. Allie worked herself too much not to get some good loving of the lady kind. Taking a peek wouldn't hurt. Santana flicked open the little card attached. It was typed, but looked customized so Santana couldn't help but read it.

It read:

_Brittany,_

_Thanks again for last night! You're the best! I know I said I might not be around as much. But I was hoping that maybe we could get together today. I have a lacrosse game at the indoor field at Work-R-Holics Complex at 2pm. Maybe I could buy you a soda as a thanks for talking to me. I needed it._

_Tim_

Santana cocked her head to the side. Her eyes quickly scanned the card three, four, five, a hundred times just to make sure that she was reading it correctly. Tim really was trying to steal her girl! This was not just something in her head!

He was so dead.

She quickly unlocked her phone to check the time.

3:15

Maybe if she hurried she could catch the game and meet this Tim for herself. He had no idea what was coming for him. Santana dropped the flowers on the steps so Brittany wouldn't suspect anything. Unlocking the door, Santana threw Allie's bag on the ground and quickly went to lock it again so she could make it to the complex in time.

But no, Lord Tubbington decided that now he wanted Santana's attention. The cat meowed loudly from the kitchen followed by the distinct sound of a metal bowl dragging around the counter.

"Shit." She had totally forgotten about feeding the Tubbsters. She stormed into the kitchen. The cat sensed a disturbance because it whipped around to face the Latina. Santana could tell by the look in the feline's eyes that he hadn't expected to see her again. No time to reacquaint herself with Brittany's cat, Santana bent over and lifted the hissing cat. "No time today, Tubbs. We have an appointment across town. So we are getting your food to go!"

Santana looked around and grabbed one of the many boxes of Lucky Charms on the counter. That would have to do. She ran out of the house barely able to hold the cat, the Charms, and the keys, but she finally locked the door. LT struggled and hissed, but Santana ignored the scratches on her arm. She wasted no time or pleasantries as she threw the cat into the back seat. She ripped open the box of cereal and dumped some on the back seat for the cat to eat.

Upholstery be damned! She would be there in time to confront this Tim about _her _Brittany. She shifted her car into gear and sped off. Lord Tubbington tensed and hissed from the backseat at the speed, but Santana could care less. "Shut it Tubbers, think of it like your monthly field trip. This boy Tim is all over your girl and you are still mad at me. Typical."

She rounded into the parking lot at 3:30 and put the car in park. Santana looked back at Lord Tubbington to see if she had finally killed the pain-in-the-ass, but the cat continued to munch happily on the cereal. He would be fine. Tim would not be. The door burst open as Santana ran into the sports complex. Guys her age, some of them she recognized, were walking into the entrance at the same time. A few of them called her name, but dressed as she was and in her current frantic state, Santana blew them off.

The lacrosse fields behind the basketball courts and across from the ice skating rinks. Santana ran to get there, but when she arrived only a few people remained mostly adults talking.

"Fuck." She had been too late. Santana fumed at herself then at the cat for having to cart his fat ass all the way here. But she spotted a few guys all the way on the other side of the field. Maybe they would know where she could find Tim.

"Hi." Santana smiled sweetly trying to charm them.

They had to be sophomores or something because they instantly straightened up at the attention of a girl like Santana.

"Hi." "Hey."

She still had it even if she looked like a hobo fashion designer had dressed her this morning.

"I just wanted to know if you guys know a Tim. I was supposed to meet him at the game earlier, but it looks like I missed it. Do you guys know if he's still around?"

The two guys glanced at each other then her then back to each other as if trying to communicate silently.

"Yeah we know a Tim, but you're definitely not the girl he thought was going to meet here today."

Santana didn't know what angered her more – the fact Tim had expected Brittany to drop everything and be here or that these boys knew Brittany well enough to know what the blonde looked like.

"Oh so he has other girls besides me?"

The one guy laughed. "Nah, he has lots of girls but he's been trying to work his magic on this blonde chick for the past few weeks. It's cute watching him be nice instead of his usual self."

Santana reminded herself yet again that she couldn't attack these guys for information. They didn't even go to her school. Noises from behind alerted Santana that the next group of guys would be coming on to play soon so she couldn't linger much longer. "So he's a total player. Any chance he's going to seal the deal with this blonde girl?"

The two guys looked at each other again as if once more exchanging secret information. "I wouldn't say player although he's a beast on the field both in lacrosse and off, but I don't know. The blonde chick showed up a lot and they always hung around talking to each other, but she's kinda out of his league."

Santana smiled. Good.

The other guy added right afterwards, "But that's only because they're not on the same level. He's smart, he'll totally find a way to work through that. Besides they share all that mystery stuff and they don't go to the same school. They always have to meet up."

Santana frowned. What did any of that mean?

"Wait. What?" She asked but the guys were already waving to her. An older guy with a whistle and bag stepped onto the field and motioned her to clear off. "Hold up!"

The one guy kept running but the cuter one with shaggy hair lingered back. "What? Our coach is gonna kill us if we keep talking to you."

"Look I am having a party tonight at my place. How about you and your friend come over. Invite Tim. It should be fun." Santana reached over the bench and pulled out a pen from a clip board. She smiled batting her eye lashes at the kid. Did she know why she was doing this? No. But she needed some other way to find this Tim character. Maybe he would show. She leaned over and seductively bit her bottom lip as she lifted the guy's shirt sleeve to write out her number. "Text me later."

The kid practically drooled. She had to control the urge to roll her eyes. "What's your name?"

"Santana." She gave him a wink before signing her name underneath the number with a heart. That should do it. "Tell Tim that the blonde should be making an appearance as well."

"Sure." The kid said absentmindedly. Santana smiled again. A whistle directed towards them made the guy stop staring so blatantly at her. He started and nodded emphatically before running back to the field. He ran straight to his other friend already telling him about how he got Santana's number and the party. Perfect.

She pulled out her phone and started texting everyone she knew. First text went straight to Puck.

_Asshole. Party my place. Bring kegs._

_Yes! Hven't had a party in forever._

_Whatev. Tell every1. Dnt forget beer._

The brunette made eye contact with no one else as she walked out of the complex. Next person was Quinn.

_Change of plans. Parents out of country. Party at my place. Text every1 in glee._

_You sure? I know how you hate pretending that you actually like them._

_Every1, might as well. Besides we strt school monday. _

_Even Rachel?_

_Bring ur troll. I'll make sure theres something shiny for her 2 play w. No musicals!_

_Cya, San._

Finally as she reached her car, Santana pulled out her phone to text the only person that really mattered – Brittany.

_Hey baby change of plans._

_Oh like what?_

_No Breadstix. Party at my place. Hope ur rdy to dance w me._

_Always! Still pickin me up?_

_Of course._

_Take care of LT?_

Santana's heart stopped. The fucking cat was still in her car. Her beautiful baby! She ran through the last bit of parking lot to her red car. Inside the Mercedes, the cat had torn into the box of cereal tossing marshmallows and dried cereal all over the back seat. Her heart stopped again. There in the middle of the seat was a tear through the leather.

This meant war.

_Dnt worry. I will take care of LT._

Satana closed her phone shut and threw open her car door lunging for the enormous cat at the same time. She yelled and the cat hissed. People walked by unsure if they should help the feline, the girl, or to call security or something.

* * *

><p><strong>Soooooo we continue to wonder who this mysterious Tim could be and how well he really knows Brittany. And what is his deal? Is Santana too late to protect her girl?<strong>

**Thanks for all the feedback and responses! :D**


	11. The Right Kind of STimulation

**Hey guys! This chapter promises to be a shit show in all ways. Hope you like it. It was def a guilty pleasure I always wanted to write. **

**Just a quick blurb about the last chapter – make sure you guys don't skip over it. FF was acting all kinds of funky the day I posted so make sure you don't start this one before you read that one. **

**Quick recap of X. InTimacy Interrupted: S and B hash out a fight about Tim and why Britt didn't show up at the airport followed by San trying to track down Tim in order to confront him about his relationship with Brittany. **

**If you have read the chapter then by all means continue on! Thanks!**

* * *

><p><strong>XI. The Right Kind of STimulation<strong>

Santana hadn't wasted any time after she had been foiled at the sports complex. She continued to text people she knew and make all the arrangements. Really not a lot needed to be done once word of a party got around to a few of the more connected kids at school. Plus everyone had been looking forward to blowing off some steam before they had to stumble back into school. Puck arrived with kegs and set up tables in the basement, Sam arrived not too long after with some sound equipment and some tricks he had learned when he had been a go-go dancer or whatever he had been doing away from McKinley.

It wasn't long till Mariska's perfectly kept house had been trashed.

Music thumped throughout the walls shaking the ceiling and the lampshades. People danced around all over the living room, through the kitchen and down the basement. The sound of video games and people playing Mariokart echoed from the tv while sounds came from the kitchen as two different drinking games were being played on the same table. Girls dressed in barely anything that covered their bodies danced on thrusting hips and guys bumping up against them.

Sam had pulled out some old DJ equipment and stood behind his setup playing club music for the dancers. Most of the football team had shown up, the basketball team had already pregamed and arrived hammered around 10:30, and the cheerios had shown up liquor in water bottles stored in purses that ranged from all the colors of the fruit juice section at the grocery store.

The glee kids had arrived early for the most part. Rachel and Finn had started with light mixed drinks and were now sitting in the kitchen making out in the corner. Mercedes with a beer in hand had made her way towards the DJ table where Sam kept looking up towards her. The girl definitely wasn't subtle. Blain and Kurt had made their way downstairs to where the guys were all playing pong.

Music kept blasting throughout the house. Santana made her way from her room to stand on the landing of the stairs. The Latina had decided to where a short red dress which left almost nothing to the imagination, boots, and had let her hair hang around her shoulders. In one hand she held her cellphone and in the other hand she held a red solo cup filled with a few different liquors and some orange juice. All that matter was that it was strong, but fruity enough that she could pretend it tasted good.

Her dark eyes scanned the room. Most of the kids went to McKinley. Occasionally her eyes drifted to some face she didn't know. Then she would linger for a moment just to make sure that the person couldn't possibly be Tim. Each time she would have to rule out the possibility. Too fat. Too annoying. Too girly. Too, no wait that actually was a girl. Too clingy. Too ridiculous. Too ugly. And so on.

Santana breathed from her nostrils not yet feeling the effects of the alcohol yet. She took another swing of her drink. Where were the punks from the complex? There was no possible way any guy could resist her charms especially when she had practically put herself out there for him. Her tricks always worked and just because she had been quite publically identified as a lesbian didn't mean she was any less hot. They would show.

Until then…

Her dark brown eyes lit up at a flash of blonde across the room. The cup at her lips lingered for a moment.

Brittany.

The blonde had been dancing with Mike in a short skirt and a pink cut off the shoulder top with some print on it. Really Santana couldn't be too concerned with what she was wearing. Her eyes were firmly checking out the long tone leg muscles that could go on forever. And of course she was dancing. Santana smirked into her drink as she enjoyed watching Brittany dance like no one in the world existed.

A tap on her legs from beneath the stairs snapped the girl from her lustful leering.

"Santana! Yo!" Puckerman had yanked at the bottom of her dress from below between the rods of the stairs. "We're up."

"What? Get off Puck." Santana kicked at him to get his hand off her dress.

"Pong. Hello! You told me to sign us up. Well we are up and we have a reputation to maintain."

"Shit. I'm no where drunk enough yet."

"Down that drink like a champ and let's go then Lopez!" Puck clapped his hands like he was encouraging one of his teammates out of the field. "Come on! Chug that shit and get your ass down here!"

Santana sneered at the boy below her, but didn't hesitate to tip the cup all the way back. She grimaced afterwards. Not from the alcohol, but from the rushed sugar consumption from the juice. Whatever. It was worth it, she told herself.

"That's not gonna be enough. Get over here!" Puck grabbed Santana's hand and pulled her down the stairs the rest of the way. Santana grunted, but didn't resist. Her eyes glanced once more towards where Brittany was still dancing with Mike. For a moment their eyes met, but it didn't last long. Puck had steered them through the bodies around the living room and into the kitchen.

A group of kids were playing around a ring of cups with two stacked on each other in the middle. A pong ball bounced around as they were trying to hit the middle cup. Someone hit another person's cup and the football player had to drink, he wasn't even finished with his cup when someone sunk the top cup everyone lunged for their cups. Chandelier always proved to be fun, but Puck pulled her right past the game towards the kitchen counter.

He reached into her parents cabinets. For a moment Santana felt heat creep through her cheeks as she realized exactly why and how Puck knew exactly where everything was in her house. Sometimes it felt like a lifetime ago when she considered him to be her number one guy. They had often hung out here and gotten drunk from her parents alcohol. Now when she looked at him, all Santana could think about was how ridiculous his hair looked.

"All the way." Puck poured her a shot of grey goose.

She laughed. "Really? At least it will go down pretty easy, but I was expecting you to pull out some Vlad from your combat boots."

"What can I say? I wanted to be classy tonight. Besides this bottle's on your parents, so I can afford to be classy as fuck." Puck lifted the shot glass. Santana mirrored the motion. "Cheers."

They clinked glasses then downed the drink. For a moment Santana felt the burn, but it turned to an icy chill that settled throughout her body. She shuddered then stuck her glass out. "One more. I'm not losing pong in my own house."

"Damn. It's gonna be a good night." Puck winked before he filled her glass again. They repeated the ritual.

"Letz go kick some ass." Santana smirked before grabbing a cup and filling it with beer from the keg.

"That's the spirit."

She followed Puck down to the basement. It was darker and set up like a rec room, but Puck had brought over his pong table and had set it up. A few guys were playing pool on her father's prized table. One of the many ipod docks in her house had been confiscated and playing different music than upstairs. Here in the darkness of the basement, couples danced up on each other grinding and moving to the beat. It was hot and sweaty in the corner closest to the second keg and the music. Santana felt her body humming now with the help of the alcohol and the tight quarters. Heat radiated from the basement. She couldn't wait till she found her blonde bombshell later.

A small gathering had worked themselves around the pong table. Kurt and Blaine were playing two football players and winning? Santana couldn't believe her eyes. The two gay boys were working the table at the moment.

Go team gay!

Santana shared a knowing glance to her pong partner. Puck smirked. They were thinking the same thing. He shrugged and gave her another wink. They tapped cups and took another swing of beer together right as Kurt sunk the last shot.

Kurt shrieked as he jumped up and down hugging Blaine.

"Fuck, man!" The one football player cussed.

"If you could get a fucking cup this wouldn't have happened!"

"Beat by the fucking gay kid."

Santana tensed for a moment, but the other football player shrugged the comment off before turning to Kurt and Blaine.

"Good fucking game. I want a rematch." They shook hands.

"I am pretty good with balls." Kurt responded with a wink. Everyone started laughing. Blaine quickly pulled his boyfriend back from the football players. All it took was a drink and Kurt had become quite bold. Didn't want to risk starting a fight already. Luckily most of the guys had laughed and thought it a funny joke on their teammates.

Beer pong solved all the problems in the world.

"Who's next?" Blaine asked in a cocky voice while drinking more from his cup.

"You know you didn't want to ask that because for tonight only we have the biggest badasses of the table reuniting." Santana took a step forward. She and Puck high fived each other before rolling the balls back the two boys. They quickly set up the cups.

"Seriously?" Kurt frowned. "I thought you had given up on boys and balls, Santana."

"Ha! A good thing too since that means more for you. Nice try, but I don't give up on winning and this is my game sweet cheeks. Get ready to have Blaine crying on your shoulder in a few minutes."

Within seven minutes, Santana and Puck had handedly defeated the gay dream team and were starting on their next opponents and another beer.

Four games later, Santana held the pong ball in her hand eyeing up the cup. Her head felt good – very good. A little fuzzy, but very good. In fact, she really didn't have a word for the state she felt because she was in the zone. It was a special place when she rarely missed a cup and when beer tasted like water. At the thought of beer, she took another swig from her cup.

This had so far been the hardest game of the night. Artie had a wicked shot from his wheelchair. How had he had gotten down the stairs into the basement? Those were logistics Santana didn't have time for at the moment. The bastard had gotten them to go into double over time again. And it looked like it might happen again. They were both down to one cup.

"Sink this shit." Puck muttered behind her ear, but the girl didn't hear it.

Instead her eyes glanced towards Artie's partner, Tina. Strange. She instantly thought of Mike and Mike had been with Brittany. It became harder to concentrate on the ball and the cup. She hadn't seen Brittany in awhile. Just when the brunette might have started to panic, Brittany made her way down the stairs to the signup sheet Puck had taped to the basement wall. Her blue eyes sought out Santana's. Sparks flew as the blonde made sure to bite her bottom lip while signing her name and another name Santana could make out to play next.

Clearly Brittany meant to challenge Santana to a game of pong. Heat flashed through her body at the come on. Fuck. That was hot. Santana felt the boldness of alcohol respond for her. She kept her cool.

Instead of reacting like the horny girl who wanted to jump Britt right there, Santana smirked back at the girl. Her eyes kept complete contact with Brittany as she took a blind shot at the cup across the table. She didn't need to hear Artie groaning, Tina yelling something about how ridiculous Santana was, or even the satisfying plunk of the ball hitting the water to know that she had made the shot.

Brittany pretended to not acknowledge that Santana had just made a no look cup. Instead she got up from leaning against the wall and made her way towards the brunette. Puck had moved to the table to begin setting up for the next game. It gave Brittany a clear path unhindered right to Santana. For a moment their bodies brushed. Santana lifted her hand to wrap around Brittany's waist at the same time the blonde leaned into her. Their lips were only an inch apart.

"Dare you to try that stunt when I'm kicking your ass, Lopez." Brittany had also been drinking.

"I'll dare a lot more than that before the end of the night." Santana had yet to break eye contact.

"I doubt you'll even be able to make one cup this game."

"Why's that?"

Brittany leaned all the way in. Her lips grazed over Santana's ear lobe. A shiver ran down her body at the contact. Her breath stopped in her throat as Brittany continued talking. "Cause you'll be too busying trying not to cum thinking about me."

Just like that the moment was over, but already Santana could feel her body shaking up and down tingling from the feelings. Shit.

Puck turned around to see the last part of the exchange. Her frowned and instantly grabbed Santana's arm and shook her. "Tan the man, this is no time to get your panties in a fucking twist! Snap out of whatever hot lesbo spell your girl put on you! We are playing against some kid I don't know therefore we have to win! Reputation, remember?"

Santana's eyes snapped up at the mention of a foreign invader to their party. Tim?

Unfortunately she recognized the kid from the lacrosse field and standing right behind him was the other guy. She had completely forgotten about Tim and her half-baked plan to try and get him to show up at the party. Her eyes searched for another unfamiliar face, but no one stood out. Maybe Tim had been a no show again. Shit.

"Sanny baby, anytime." Brittany teased from across the table.

Santana looked down to the ball in her hands. A lot was riding on this game.

She looked up about to shoot when her eyes were drawn upwards again. Brittany's hand ran lightly over her exposed collarbone. To anyone else it might have looked natural, but Santana knew by the way her body was reacting that Brittany was teasing her on purpose.

"Shit." She had thrown the ball wide.

Puck made his first shot and glared at Santana. "Get it together. Focus on the cups only!"

Brittany smirked from across the table drawing Santana's eyes away from the table once more. She heard the sound of a bounce too late to swat the ball away from the cups. That lacrosse punk had bounced on her. Puck growled and forced his partner out of the way.

"Fine. I'll watch the cups since you can't seem to keep your eyes from your girl's tits." Puck moved away two cups and then another when Brittany made her shot. All of a sudden they were down three to one. Santana shook her head angrily. Damn Brittany. The blonde ran her tongue along her bottom lip before dragging her teeth. Her hand had moved from her collarbone to run one finger down her chest towards her cleavage. She ran her finger back and forth never breaking eye contact with Santana except to shoot. The influence of alcohol and Brittany's eyes were more than enough to mesmerize and seduce the Latina.

Luckily they didn't make another shot.

Puck picked up the balls and hesitated to give one to Santana.

"What's your name kid?" He called to Brittany's pong partner. He needed to get Santana to look away from Brittany. Fuck! He needed to look away from Brittany. The girl was practically eye fucking the shit out of Santana at the moment. It was hot.

"Brian."

"How do you know Brittany?"

"She's friends with one of my friends."

Santana finally broke contact with Brittany at the mere suggestion of Tim. Brittany noticed and pouted from across the table.

"Who's that?" Santana asked sweetly.

"Oh you know, Tim." The guy answered back confused why Santana didn't know that since had been the one to invite them. Brian had been pretty sure Santana knew Tim since she had come looking for him that afternoon at the lacrosse field.

"Right, Tim! How could I forget?" Santana shot the ball and missed. She cussed silently. Her eyes purposely avoided Puck. "Where's Tim? Why couldn't he make it?"

Brittany felt tipsy, but something about this convo felt strange. She glanced to Santana, but her girlfriend wasn't paying any attention to her anymore. Instantly she wondered how Brian had even known about the party and how he knew Santana.

"Homework besides way past his curfew especially since he has those commercials coming up. I don't even think he can come to lacrosse practices anymore." He paused then turned to Brittany. "Did you hear about that dance he is going to? I heard they might show a screening of audition video to celebrate his gig. Are you going? I know he keeps talking about it and how to get you to come."

Brian's words lingered in the air. Santana had heard them, but she couldn't start a scene not here. Tim had asked Brittany to some dance. Or something about a dance with Brittany. Santana looked to her girlfriend to see her reaction, but Brittany didn't respond. Fuck. She mentally kicked herself in the head. She needed to remember this tomorrow. For now she had to continue being the good girlfriend and play pong.

Santana contained her frustration. Puck made another cup. At least he could carry them for now. They continued to play. Santana had yet to make one cup. Brittany kept laughing and talking to Brian. Even if this kid wasn't Tim, she still felt protective and apprehensive towards anyone with Brittany. She took another sip of her beer glaring over the rim. Puck made another shot.

Again they were down one to one. Somehow Puckerman had been able to sink almost all his cups to keep them alive. Reputation was the only word in his vocabulary at the moment. Brian shot and missed. Brittany crunched her nose and grabbed some guy's hat from off his head as he walked by. He protested for only a moment, but the sight of a hot blonde made him rethink his arguments. Britt flipped the cap backwards as she took aim. Santana's stomach tighten then flipped. The ball released from her girlfriend's hand and hit the rim. It popped out and rolled back across the table. Both Santana and Brittany lunged for the ball, but the taller girl beat her to it.

"Girls shoot left handed." Puck taunted. "Go ahead and try."

Brittany smiled mischievously, "Are you saying that I can't make it behind the back?"

If she didn't personally know how good Brittany was with those long fingers, Santana wouldn't have been worried.

"Go ahead and try it darling." Puck slurred a little with a strange accent.

Brittany wrapped her arm around her back and smoothly tossed the ball right into the cup. Puck smacked his hands to his face. Brian high-fived his friend and then Brittany. But Santana had other plans. Her head was buzzing with sexual frustration and sexy feelings all relating to Brittany's stellar performance. She crossed the table with a mission. Her hands found either side of Britt's head. She pulled her girlfriend into a hot kiss. Their bodies dipped into each other's for a moment to the beat of the music as all the other noise stopped.

After they realized the party had stopped, Santana opened her eyes and looked around. Everyone had been staring at them. Puck's mouth hung open. Brian walked up to him. "Shit man, you see them like this all the time?"

"I wish."

Santana rolled her eyes glared at everyone. "Show's over. Get back to your shit before I kick you all out!" No one moved. She jutted forward. It startled most people. They all went back to their own dancing and games.

"There you two are. Get up here. Please it's unbearable without out you guys." Quinn called downstairs.

* * *

><p>Drinks, beers, shots, and games later, the room was spinning.<p>

"No, no! I did not kiss him!" Puck was yelling quite loudly.

They sat in a circle at the kitchen table. The party was in full swing and yet somehow the glee kids had all gravitated to each other. Maybe it had been the time apart, but they were playing a variety of card games.

Most of the crew had a number of fingers up or as in Puck's case were down. Never Have I Ever.

"Then why is your finger down?" Sam asked with a smirk.

"The question was never have I ever kissed anyone from the football team!" Brittany yelled then threw a glance to Artie with a grin since he had been the one to say it. Both Brittany and Santana had put one of their fingers down. Everyone had been expecting that since they had been trying to get the two girlfriends out, but when Puck had tried to sneak a finger down, Mike had instantly called him out.

"It wasn't like a real thing! We were reaching for the same towel in the shower, I didn't know how close we were!" Puck tried to defend himself. "Besides Finn's always so awkward."

"What!" Santana roared laughing. "Oh my god! With Finn? So gross!"

Everyone looked towards where the football captain should have been to respond to such outrageous accusations. Instead he was making out with Rachel. She sat in his lap completely oblivious to anything happening at the table.

"Speaking of gross…" Santana muttered at the display. "At least when Britts and I get our macks on, it's hot and sexy."

Brittany nodded before leaning over to kiss Santana.

After a moment, Santana continued talking, "I thought I told you to keep the troll on a leash, Fabray."

She looked towards Quinn, the other blonde barely acknowledged Santana's snarky comment. Instead her eyes were torn between staring at Rachel and Finn and not looking at them at all.

"Awwwwkkkwarrrdd." Brittany sang into Santana's ear before giggling.

"Oh! I got a good one!" Sam said to change the subject. His words skipped over each other. "Who would you make out with? Same sex, but not allowed to choose each other Blaine and Kurt and you two." He pointed at Santana and Brittany. "Has to be someone different. Go!"

He pointed at Mercedes first.

"Oh gosh!" She giggled holding at hand to her chest still laughing. "Tina! Definitely Tina! She's been so funny all night!"

Now Tina was giggling too as they clutched at each other busting up with laughter at some inside joke.

Kurt went next. "Sam." He said stealing a glance at the blonde boy then at his own boyfriend. He tried to pretend he wasn't blushing then batted his eyes towards Blaine to wait for his answer.

"Mike. He's got the moves like Jagger." Everyone started to laugh. Mike did some fancy robot moves and winked towards Blaine which gained more laughter.

"How bout you Santana?"

Santana went to open her mouth, but Brittany jumped in. "She would definitely make out with Rachel!"

Santana whipped her head around glaring. Her mouth had dropped open. Everyone was laughing so hard. She swatted out at Brittany's hand. "As if! Oh you are so dead, Miss Pierce."

Brittany continued to laugh while playing with Santana's hair twisting it gently.

"How about you, Quinn?"

Quinn glanced at Rachel then shrugged, "Coach Sylvester obviously."

"Ohhhhhh" Everyone made the same noise.

"That's terrible!"

"No!"

"Well at least we know how she got to be the head cheerio now!" Mercedes cracked a joke. Everyone kept laughing.

"Too much. Too much." Santana shook her head as she kept laughing. Everything was spinning now. It felt good. She looked up and caught those bright blue eyes on hers again. "You owe me a dance."

Brittany didn't say a word. The blonde could also feel the alcohol coursing through her body. The music had switched to some beat. Words weren't needed. She reached out and grabbed onto the mocha hand offered. The living room had been converted to a dance floor. Football players had trickled up from the basement and moved to find an open body to dance on. Girls grinded their asses against guys or on each other.

Santana could care less. She only had eyes for Brittany. Their hands disconnected. The gaze between them intensified. The air already felt hot and heavy before they stepped into each other, but the moment their bodies touched, the floor seemed to melt. The music grew louder. Not a lot of space made them brush up against other people, but more importantly up into each other.

The music pounded vibrating the floor up through their bodies. Brittany wrapped an arm around Santana's waist and pulled her in close. The brunette paused for a moment to create tension between their bodies before she relented and moved into Britt. Her arms wrapped around the taller girl's neck pulling her head down so Brittany's lips were tantalizingly close. Long finger spread across her waist and stretched to her backside sliding down the small of her back to linger on her ass. Santana's body arched at the contact pushing them further up against each other.

The music changed again the beat dropping lower and slowing up. Brittany smirked. Santana's breath hitched as she instantly recognized that look from her girlfriend. Before she could react, Brittany had turned the brunette around. Her backside flushed against Brittany. The blonde pulled her in by the waist while Santana leaned over to grind her ass right into her girlfriend. Britt let out a satisfied moan as they continued to dance to the music. She slowed up her movements and made sure to rub her girlfriend with each beat of the song.

It was so hot now. They were sweating and the room was spinning, but they didn't care. Santana reached her arm back to hook around Brittany's neck. In turn, the blonde pushed Santana's hair away from her neck to kiss her exposed skin. Santana leaned further back to let soft lips run up and down her salty skin.

"Fuck." She whispered breathlessly as her girlfriend bit her neck ever so lightly.

"I love dancing with you, San."

"You love dancing." Santana teased.

"Yeah but with you it's like sex." Brittany said deadpan. Her hot words rolled through the shorter girl's body.

"We should get out of here." Santana moaned as she felt Brittany's hands inching up her thighs. She pressed harder back, but she couldn't contain the way her body felt. All she wanted was for Brittany to push her hands even higher up her dress where she knew was soaked.

"You mean go to your room?" It was Brittany's turn to tease. She purposely left one hand playing up the hem of Santana's dress, but the other hand she slowly worked up Santana's body. Fingers lingers and playfully touching over the bunching material around her stomach.

Santana could barely think – the alcohol, the music, Brittany's sticky sexual words, and her proximity. "Anywhere."

Brittany's eyes scanned the room. People were dancing or tripping over themselves. Yeah it had been a real shit show. What she noticed on the stairs were people streaming up and down from the second floor to the living room. Finn and Rachel were making out on the stairs. Sam and Mercedes were still dancing. Puck had two cheerleaders on his lap.

The way Santana was grinding and dancing meant they needed a room fast. Brittany leaned back down. "I'll find us a place. Give me a few minutes then meet me upstairs."

Santana nodded, but when the blonde tried to walk away, she pulled at Brittany's hand. They kissed for a moment in the middle of the living room between other bodies dancing. Finally Britt pulled away with a wink. "See you soon."

The brunette could only suck in a deep breath as she tried not to look so obvious. The room spun but she remained motionless as she watched her girlfriend navigate through bodies to climb up the stairs.

"You and B gonna get it on?" Puck came up behind her and made a kissy face.

"Uh. Get out of here." Santana pushed him out of the way.

She looked around. How long had Brittany been gone?

"Well anytime you wanna expand that hot mess to three-"

"As if."

Santana walked away and stumbled into Mike and Tina dancing. Mike winked at her before they moved along.

For an instant Santana recognized Brittany's vice president from Student Council. In that brief moment, drunk Santana convinced herself that Jenny had been checking out Britt's ass. Santana pointed to the girl and made a line across her throat. A very clear message and warning – if Jenny wanted to live, she wouldn't think twice about the Latina's girlfriend. Jenny took the hint and slithered away fast.

Satisfied, Santana continued to move towards the stairs. It was a good thing they had split up maybe it wouldn't be so obvious why she was leaving her own party in order to go upstairs.

She stepped over bodies and stumbled up the steps to the second floor. Her body still thrummed with the feeling of her girlfriend's dancing body up against hers. The hallway was darker, but after the landing, not as many people were around. Santana smiled. Maybe no one would be up here except for her and Britt. About halfway down the hallway, Santana felt a hand grab onto her arm.

Golden hair.

Then lips meeting hers.

Santana smiled into the kiss in the dimly lit corridors of her hallway. But as she opened her eyes, she knew something wasn't right especially when lips against hers whispered. "Rachel."

Dark coffee eyes widened in surprise. This was _not_ Brittany. Everything felt different. This blonde was far too short and her hair wasn't a flowing mess from dancing. She didn't smell right and their bodies didn't mesh together like they should have.

"Quinn?" Santana asked.

The blonde only nodded in a drunken haze. Tempted to laugh, Santana instead bit her bottom lip with a smirk. "You thought I was Rachel? Wanky."

That explained a lot.

Quinn tried to kiss her again. For a moment Santana hesitated. She wanted to find Brittany. Her eyes darted over Quinn's shoulder as the blonde's lips touched her neck. When was the last time Quinn had a quality lay if she was moping over Berry? Santana shook her head. Probably not since Quinn had gotten preggers with Puck. Sad.

Another head of blonde hair popped out of her father's study down the hall. Santana's lips froze in mid kiss as she recognized Brittany. Her heart stopped. Not out of fear her girlfriend would be jealous, the unholy trinity had gotten its nickname for a variety of reasons. Instead the intensity of Brittany's gaze stopped Santana's breath. Pure passion. Pure desire even with another girl kissing Santana, Brittany's azure eyes remained transfixed on Santana's deep chocolate eyes.

"Berry's not coming." Santana remembered seeing Finchel getting their kiss on the stairs when she had stumbled up here a few minutes ago. Quinn nodded now looking up at Santana. Their eyes met and Santana knew that Quinn knew who she had been kissing. The alcohol, Brittany's gaze from down the hall, and Quinn's body reignited everything inside the brunette. She cupped Quinn's chin gently and leaned into her. Their mouths so close and her eyes never blinked, Santana whispered. "Come with me."

Quinn took a short breath. Sure she had kissed Santana and Brittany before when they had gotten drunk in a hotel room once for a cheerleading competition, but this would be totally different. After watching Rachel shove her tongue down Finn's throat all night, Quinn felt so frustrated. Here with Santana so close, she felt both safe and dangerous at once. She needed this and she knew despite her drunken state that she could trust her sometimes friend sometimes enemy.

A quick peck to Santana's luscious lips were all she needed to respond. Santana's face flushed with the feel of Quinn's lips complying willingly.

Santana looked again to Brittany down the hall. Her girlfriend leaned against the wall. She crooked her finger once with a look that invited trouble. Santana smirked and pulled Quinn's hand. Brittany disappeared into the study right as Santana reached the door. For a moment she thought her girlfriend had vanished, but a hand reached out and pulled her in.

Finally the right lips met hers. She dropped Quinn's hand as Brittany pushed the door closed behind the two girls. Santana moaned as she felt the hardwood door on her back and the firm press of her girlfriend's body between her legs. Eager hands inched her dress up so Santana could straddle Britt's leg. Their mouths connected and they kissed long and hard for a few moments picking up where they had left off downstairs.

Her hands trailed up Brittany's side followed by a soft moan. Santana opened her eyes for the first time since pulling Quinn into the study. Quinn leaned against the wall next to the door. Her eyes wide watching her two friends making out on the door. The brunette pushed Britt back an inch and motioned over to Quinn. The girl didn't move, but that did not deter the Latina. She whispered something to Brittany afterwards they both looked at their friend.

Brittany left a lingering kiss on Santana's cheek before walking towards Quinn. She wasted no time as she approached the shorter blonde and cupped her face. Their lips met hungrily. Santana watched as the two blondes kissed up against the wall. Her breathing increased and grew steadily sharper as Brittany lifted Quinn's arms above her head pinning them to the wall. Her other hand worked down the girl's body touching and hugging every curve.

Finally all the attention elicited a forbidden noise from the queen of chastity as she moaned at the feel of Britt's lips trailing down her collarbone. Santana felt herself heating up, but wanted to watch some more. It had been awhile since the two had done anything as adventurous with another person since they started dating. Normally it had been with a guy. With Quinn, it was so different, but in a good way.

Santana moved to her father's study armchair and pulled it out from the corner to the center of the room. She sat down spread her legs so her dress hiked up her thighs and began to touch herself watching the other two girls. Britt pulled Quinn's shirt off and had thrown it backwards from their bodies. They were still fiercely kissing. Santana could feel how wet she was and wanted more than anything to join them, but she remained seated in order to continue teasing herself.

Now Quinn wanted Britt to touch her everywhere. The short blonde ran her hands up the other girl's impossibly long legs as Brittany pulled the girl back away from the wall. Her fingers hooked into the loops on Quinn's jeans and yanked her hard. They fell stumbling backwards, but luckily didn't topple to the floor. Santana waited in the chair knowing how her girlfriend worked.

Brittany had unbuttoned Quinn's jeans and pulled them to the floor, Quinn easily stepped out of them. Within the next second, Brittany had turned the former head cheerleader around and plopped her ass right on top of Santana's lap. Santana lightly grunted, but didn't mind.

Practically naked Quinn closed her eyes in pleasure as the brunette's hands clasped her tits over the material of her bra. Brittany stood above the two girls grinning. Her eyes sought to make contact with her girlfriend. Santana and Brittany exchanged knowing glances. This was definitely hot. Brittany dropped down to her knees between both Santana's and Quinn's spread legs. Both girls on the chair moaned at the added presence.

"You know you've been thinking about this for awhile, Q." Santana breathed against the girl's exposed neck.

"Shut up."

Santana almost laughed, but instead continued to kiss her neck. Her hands undid the back of her bra and slid it from her torso tossing it aside. Brittany shimmied Quinn's panties down to her ankles before discarding them to the floor as well. Quinn's body shook from the shock and exposure. But for the most part, she reacted to the feel of Brittany's hot breath between her legs. For a moment it seemed like wanted to give into panic and jump of the embrace, but she made eye contact with Brittany once again. It took only one head nod from Quinn for Brittany to know that they were going to go all the way tonight.

She quickly kissed Quinn to encourage her, but her eyes searched for approval from the brunette. She wanted Santana to be onboard with a third person literally between them. As if to respond to the question, Santana grabbed one of Brittany's hands and lifted it to her face. She slowly opened her succulent lips and stuck a finger in her mouth. She let the single digit drag along her lips into her hot mouth. Then she stuck another finger in making sure to completely soak Britt's fingers. Brittany let out a low moan and ground herself against Quinn's legs.

Fuck.

Santana's eyes sparkled with the knowledge that she knew her girlfriend was so incredibly turned on right now.

"Do it." Santana murmured as she pulled Britt's fingers from her mouth. Brittany nodded.

Both Quinn and Brittany responded to the forceful words. Quinn moaned while Brittany tried to rub herself harder against Quinn's body to relieve some of the sexual tension building between her own legs.

She slipped her hand down to Quinn's burning core and drew the already wet fingers across the girl's soaking pussy. Quinn sucked in a deep breath. Her head rolled back into Santana's body. Santana hardly noticed. Her eyes were on Brittany alone. Brittany didn't shy away from the eye contact. She slipped one finger into Quinn. The girl between them began gyrating her hips on the finger and into the seated Santana.

Brittany pushed her long finger in and out. In and out never breaking the connection she shared over Quinn with her girlfriend. Santana ran her tongue around her lips feeling her body heat up as Quinn grinded down in her lap. Brittany took the opportunity to lean into the Quinn's quaking body. Her finger still steadily worked between the blonde's legs, but Britt's focus was on Santana's mouth. They crashed together kissing each other with such fervor and passion. Santana ran her hands through Brittany's hair pulling the girl flush against Quinn's body so they could kiss harder.

Embolden by her girlfriend's needy kisses, Brittany slipped a second finger into the girl between their bodies. Quinn's eyes rolled back. Her hands grasped at the chair arm and around Britt's waist. Santana's one hand reached down between them as she ran her fingers up and down Brittany's hand going in and out of the former cheerio's pussy. The feel of a second hand even if it barely grazed her, set Quinn off. The girl's back arched completely off Santana's body into Britt as she felt orgasm after orgasm rack her body. Finally she slumped between them breathing hard and heavy. Her eyes closed.

Santana shared a smirk with Brittany. They maneuvered the blonde to the sit on the large armchair by herself. First San pressed a soft kiss to the girl's lips followed by Britt also kissing Quinn. Brittany grabbed a small blanket from one of the other chairs and placed it over her body. Quinn mumbled something incoherent before falling asleep.

But the two remaining girls didn't notice. They were already at the desk pushing books and paperwork to the floor to clear space for their frantic grabs at clothing that needed to come off and bodies that needed to meet.

* * *

><p><strong>Well not a lot of plot, but still Santana is getting closer to finding Tim. More to come! <strong>

**Sorry it took so long to post, it's getting to be the busy part of the semester. :( I will keep trying to post once a week. Soon I should be back to posting 2-3 times a week. Have a lovely week!**


	12. MisTiming

**XII. MisTiming**

"Please, Britt, inside voices be very quiet."

"San, what happened last night?" The blonde whispered.

Santana groaned. Her hands groped on the floor to grasp something – anything to orientate her to their current situation and surrounding. Instead, Santana became instantly aware this was not her room. What had happened last night?

The pounding in her head intensified as she tried to focus. Way too much alcohol last night. Way too much.

"No idea, B." Santana glanced to where she felt Brittany's body. Santana had fallen asleep naked ontop of the blonde's stomach. Brittany's head and upper torso were underneath her father's desk. "You okay under there, baby?"

Brittany groaned as an answer and shifted slightly, but she hit her head on the desk. "Ow!"

Santana chuckled and scooted down the girl's body before pulling her out from underneath the desk. "Seriously we have to find better places to crash."

"My head hurts."

"Of course it does. You just hit it. Come here." Santana pulled Brittany towards her and kissed her forehead once they were both clear of the desk. They sat for a few minutes holding each other on the floor. Each of them trying to remember what had happened the night before. "I need coffee."

"I need a new head. It still hurts."

Santana smiled and kissed her girlfriend on the head a few more times. "I like your head."

"San, do you remember last night when you were sexy dancing with me?"

"Mhmm." The brunette leaned into Brittany's neck and nuzzled her there. She noticed with satisfaction there were a few dark marks gracing the girl's neck.

"I liked that a lot." Britt agreed. "But do you remember when we came upstairs…"

Brittany trailed off. Santana stopped beaming from ear to ear as she too started to piece together the night. Sure everything had been something of a giant drunken blur, but for some reason her mind stopped working. There had been something significant that happened last night when they came upstairs.

No, not something, but someone.

As if they both remembered at the exact same time, their heads flew up from their comfortable embrace to look past the desk to the chair Santana had pulled out into the middle of the room. They could see one foot hanging from the side of the chair and a blanket draped haphazardly over the armchair. There was definitely someone sleeping there. Besides there were more clothes than usual scattered about the room.

"Oh shit." Santana whispered.

"So when we – last night – and it felt – that wasn't just a dream?" Brittany asked still trying to formulate how she felt about the whole situation. "San, that's Qui-"

"Shhh!" Santana cut Brittany off before she could completely say Quinn's name. The brunette wasn't sure how she felt about last night yet. Saying Quinn's name would only make everything real. This early in the morning, Santana was not ready to process all that information and reality. "Don't-"

Brittany smiled and leaned over to kiss her girlfriend again. Santana released a sigh of relief that Britt wasn't about to pursue her thought process. Some things were better left unsaid. Besides they were young and had done lots of things together before that they didn't talk about. Sexy time with Quinn was just going to be one of those things.

"We should at least get some clothes on, B. And we need to kick everyone out of the house before Mariska shows up and throws a fit. She's already gonna freak out about the party."

They tiptoed from the room and silently collected articles of clothing as they made their way out. Brittany showered while Santana threw people off the furniture and out of the house. Cups, chairs, food, and spills were all over the house. Oh yeah Mariska was going to be pissed and she would definitely have to tell Santana's parents. Not that it mattered, but she didn't look forward to the lecture she would only half listen to.

Eventually Brittany came downstairs and started to help Santana clean up.

"You should take a shower, San. I can clean up the basement. Think we should wake –" Britt paused before saying Quinn's name. "—her up?"

Santana shifted fumbling with a cup in her hands. "I'll get her up after my shower."

After twenty minutes showering and throwing on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, Santana eventually walked back into the study.

"Hey, Q…" Santana gently touched Quinn's shoulder beneath the blanket to wake the girl up. Slowly Quinn opened her eyes. They instantly narrowed in confusion. Santana waited patiently for Quinn to piece it all together.

"Santana?"

"Expecting anyone else?"

Quinn shook her head angrily. The emotion aimed mostly at herself. She looked down. "I'm naked."

"Yeah you are." Santana smirked before giving the girl a wink. "I brought you something to change into. Come downstairs when you're ready."

Quinn reached out and took the sweatpants and shirt her friend had brought. For a moment their eyes met, but instead of teasing the blonde, Santana only shrugged.

Santana walked downstairs to the smell of food wafting throughout the house. It smelled a hell of a lot better than the beer that had been spilled all over the floor or the bodies that had been dancing all over the place.

"B?"

The girl walked into the kitchen and couldn't help but laugh at what she saw. Brittany was elbows deep in pancake batter trying hard to mix it perfectly. She had bacon frying in the pan and eggs already on a plate. The toaster made a dinging noise and popped out four perfectly toasted pieces of bread. It was a hangover paradise. Everything a woman could want and it was all because her girlfriend was perfect.

"Welcome to Britt Britt's Breakfast Foods No Grits!" Brittany shouted at the sight of Santana.

"I didn't know you owned a diner." San teased taking a seat at the island counter. It was still a little sticky from beer, but she hardly noticed. She couldn't keep her eyes off Brittany. "Or that you were a cook."

"There's a lot you don't know about me." Britt winked.

"Doubtful."

"Here's your coffee." Brittany placed down a cup of steaming dark liquid in front of her girlfriend. "Drink up!"

"You're the best, Britt."

"Don't say that till you've had my pancakes! Then you'll know how awesome I am."

Brittany finished the sentence as she started to pour the pancake mix on the griddle. It didn't take long till Brittany was seated in Santana's lap and they were feeding each other. A piece of bacon hung from between Santana's teeth. Brittany smiled as she leaned forward to bite the other half. Santana laughed before offering Britt a forkful of pancake which the blonde eagerly ate.

Syrup dribbled from the side of the Latina's mouth at which Brittany didn't hesitate to lick from her girlfriend's face. They continued to laugh.

"Hey."

Quinn stood in the frame of the doorway dressed in Santana's old clothes. Her hair was wet. It looked like the girl had just gotten out of the shower.

"Quinn!" Brittany said excitedly and jumped off Santana's lap. She went to the cabinet and pulled out a plate. It didn't take long till she had piled it with eggs, bacon, and pancakes. "I made breakfast for us."

"Thanks, Brittany." Quinn said slowly as she sat down at the island. She pushed at the food on her plate with her fork not yet eating it. "About last night…"

"We don't have to talk about-"

"That was fun." Brittany cut Santana off. The other two girls froze and looked at the long haired blonde, but Brittany didn't notice.

"Yes…" Quinn said again slowly her words as if to allow herself time to speak. "I don't really-."

"Whatever, Q. NBD. No big deal." Santana waved her hand. "We were hammered."

"Hammering what?" Brittany asked.

"Apparently each other." Santana murmured under her breath. Quinn pretended she didn't hear it, but a slight blush rose to her cheeks. She quickly took a sip of her own coffee to hide.

"It's just I didn't realize how much I drank…"

"Quinn," Finally Santana turned to look her friend in the eye. They had known each other for so long even if they still pretended to be enemies at times, it didn't change the fact that they had been there for each other at different times. "Seriously we don't need to have this conversation. What we do need to talk about is why you called me Rachel."

Quinn stopped breathing. Her eyes darted back and forth across Santana's face. It was the only answer the Latina needed. It all made sense even if Santana didn't want to understand or see the way Quinn had been all over Berry recently. Gross.

"Nevermind. You don't need to answer." Santana again spoke over Quinn so her friend didn't feel embarrassed. "It's Berry so I don't want to know."

Brittany stopped cleaning up the pots and pans. She turned to watch the exchange. Even if the rest of glee club, the cheerios, and most of McKinley thought the blonde cheerleader had no clue what was happening in the rest the world that was far from the truth. The desire to hear Santana give advice overrode her usual oblivious demeanor. She wanted to hear what her girlfriend would say.

Santana continued. "You know we're here for you, but Berry's wrapped up in this perfect fantasy world that she's built around Finn. Don't waste yourself waiting for what isn't going to happen. You're too good for that."

Again color blossomed on the Quinn's cheeks except this time it was mirrored by Santana's own reaction. Brittany smiled softly and continued to put plates in the dishwasher.

"What about with you and Brittany?"

Santana paused for a moment. Her back tensed. It had not always been easy in their relationship. "I was lucky that she loved me as much as I denied loving her. But we knew the truth deep down inside, Quinn. If you really think Berry will stop with her reckless self-destruction then by all means don't stop chasing. But if you think-"

"No, its fine, Santana, I get it." Quinn shook her head. "I just never planned to feel this way. You know, but at least you guys are around. I don't know what made me suddenly think Rachel and I had these feelings for each other. I mean that's crazy, right?"

Santana shrugged, but Brittany came around the island and stood between the two chairs Santana and Quinn occupied. "You can't plan for too much, Quinn. Like last night."

"B…" Santana gave her a warning look. The Latina had thought they had decided not to talk about last night. Brittany ignored the warning.

"I mean I didn't plan to be P-I-M-P, but I had the two hottest ladies all naked underneath me. I mean that was definitely not planned. But pretty awesome." Brittany wrapped her arms around both girls' necks and pulled them closer. She kissed Quinn's cheek and then kissed Santana's lips. Santana grinned into the kiss, but Quinn rolled her eyes. She pushed Brittany's arm off her body. Brittany stopped making out with Santana to look over at Quinn. She asked with complete innocence. "Too soon?"

"Definitely too soon and will probably never happen again." Quinn responded, but smiled to show Brittany she hadn't been offended.

"That's what you say now, Q."

"There's always more alcohol."

Quinn threw her hands in the air. "Oh my God, you two are ridiculous! Just completely dysfunctional!"

Santana and Brittany gave her a look.

Quinn continued. "But you two are definitely meant for each other and still like my best friends. Thank you for everything – breakfast, talking, coffee, and yes, Brittany, thank you for last night."

Brittany beamed. Santana didn't give her girlfriend any warnings about talking about their sexcapades last night because she secretly relished the fact Quinn had a _great_ time last night.

"That's cause we are straight up the best in bed. We've had lots of practice." Brittany said enthusiastically. Now Santana shot her a glance.

"I'll see you two at school on Monday."

"See ya, Quinn."

"Whatever, Q. Try and clean up yo' act by then and maybe I might even say hi to you in the hallway."

"I won't hold my breath."

Quinn turned and left the kitchen. It didn't take long for Mariska's screech to penetrate the tranquility of their morning. She had the two girl's scrubbing floors, cleaning baseboards with tooth brushes, scrubbing toilet bowls and running beer cans and cups to the curb to be picked up by the garbage men. By the end of the afternoon, the two girls were wiped, but at least Mariska had stopped barking out orders.

They sat in the living room barely able to keep their eyes opened as they drifted in and out of a nap. Something vibrated underneath her.

"B, I think your phone is vibrating." Santana mumbled.

"Wha?" Brittany reached underneath them to the pockets of her sweats to pull out the phone.

"Who is it?"

Brittany didn't respond right away, but texted a few words back.

"B, who is it? Is it Allie? Tell her I can drive you back home for dinner, but we're napping now."

"It's not Allie. Promise me you won't be angry."

Santana tensed. Those were never good words to start off any conversation.

"I promise…"

"I kinda might have told Tim that I would go to this dance with him only if his date couldn't go for some reason."

"What? Why would you do that?" Santana no longer felt sleepy. She suddenly remembered why she had wanted the party at her house last night. It had all been a ruse to draw the mysterious and encroaching Tim out from wherever he was hiding.

"I didn't think we would go, but he looked so lonely when he said that he had asked this girl and it looked like she might bail on him. I told him that no girl would bail on him. But he was such a sad panda, so I said that I would be his backup date."

"Are you serious right now, Britt?"

"San, don't be angry. We're just gonna go and dance a little. I think they are supposed to show one of his videos or something as a way to celebrate his new commercial gig."

"Oh yeah? That's it? That's all you're going to do?" Santana huffed and sat up away from Brittany.

"Trust me, you have nothing to worry about."

"Yeah? Well where is this dance?"

"I don't think it would be a good idea for you to know, San."

"And now you aren't going to tell me? Perfect." Santana bit back angrily. She stood up from the couch. The look on Brittany's face snapped her from her temper. It would only make them fight more if Santana exploded right now. No, it would be much smarter to do a little detective work. Tim hadn't shown up at her house party last night, but he wouldn't miss a school dance featuring his face on the big screen. He would definitely be at this dance. She just needed to find out where. "Did he just text you?"

"Yeah, he wanted to know if I could meet him there."

Santana nodded and realized Britt's phone was on the coffee table in front of the couch.

"It's fine. I mean you promised. Besides I have nothing to worry about. I trust you." She didn't trust fucking Tim. Santana smiled. "Babe, do you have anymore of that coffee from this morning?"

"Yup! I made it just for you." Brittany placed a soft kiss on Santana's lips. "Thanks, San, for understanding."

Santana waited for Brittany to walk through the kitchen door before she jumped onto her girlfriend's phone. Sure she felt guilty about going behind Britt's back, but this was getting serious. She quickly found the most recent text message and forwarded it to her own phone. Brittany returned with the coffee right as Santana had successfully replaced the phone.

"Thanks, B."

Brittany sat back down on her lap.

* * *

><p>Brittany eventually left to go get ready for the dance. She had wanted Santana to come over to help her pick out a dress, but the Latina had politely refused with an excuse involving Mariska and dinner. Much to her relief, Brittany didn't push the subject and let Santana go.<p>

Santana had spent her afternoon researching the place of the dance. It looked like it would be held at a catering hall so it still didn't answer what school this Tim went to, but hopefully she would be able to clear up this whole mess by tonight.

Like the good detective Santana was slowly becoming, she phoned the catering hall ahead of time to double check on the arrangements of the dance. All students must be accompanied by an adult at least to be allowed into the dance, all students were to be dressed appropriately since it was a winter formal, if a student was not on the list then they could not be allowed entrance, all students would be provided with food and a full meal by the school, and families were invited. Santana thanked the woman on the phone.

What kind of lame ass school did Tim go to?

Santana picked up her phone. She needed an adult to drop her off at the dance. Somehow she would get in there.

The phone picked up.

"Lopez. Get some hot lady loving last night? Or was it not enough and that's why you're giving me a call?"

"Shut up, Puck. Been there done that and that's probably why I only like girls now."

"Ouch. You always have to aim below the belt."

"Focus for a second. I need-" Santana paused sucking in a breath. She hated this. "-your help with something."

"Like with what? I've learned my lesson about just volunteering to help any chick when she asks. Sometimes that chick is straight crazy bitch."

"I am _not_ one of your pool mom cougars."

"That's for sure. At least they put out."

"Again, _focus_, Puck. I need help crashing a dance. But I can only get in if I have a parental chaperone drop me off."

"So you need me because officially I am a dad? Do they have that on record or something? Do I need to bring Beth because I don't know if Shelby will be cool with me already taking her to parties. Besides you know how boys are…all they think about is sex and I think she's a little too young for that."

"No! Not because you are a dad. I need you to pretend to be my dad and sign me in."

"Oh!" Puck laughed. "Good cause I was freaking out for a moment thinking about all those things the government knows. Why do you need to get into this dance so bad?"

"No reason. Just be here and pick me up so you can drive me there."

"Does this have anything to do with Brittany and that Tim guy?"

Santana didn't answer. Over the phone her lips pursed in a tight line of annoyance that Puck had called her out.

"No."

"Ha! Knew it! I knew you sucked at pong last night for more reasons than your girlfriend giving you a show from across the table."

"Fuck off, Puckerman. Are you going to pick me up or what?"

"Yes! I definitely want to see this."

"Be here at 8:00. And wear something that makes you look like an adult. Please?"

"Not a problem. Double O Puckerman is on the case."

Santana didn't bother to respond before she shut her phone in exasperation.

She spoke to herself condescendingly. "Oh great job, Santana, you're so desperate to find Tim that you've ditched Tubbs as your partner and stepped it up to Noah. Too bad this Noah's gonna sink your ship so fast you won't even have time to apologize and explain to your girlfriend that no matter what it looks like you're not spying on her. When really you are! Great! This should turn out fan-fucking-tastic! I hate Tim."

The soliloquies and monologues denouncing her bad choice in partners and the horrible decision she was making to spy on Brittany continued all the way till it was 8:10. A car honked multiple times outside her house.

Puck rolled up to the house late like usual.

Santana walked out in a long dark blue prom dress. She had let her worked her hair in a cute tight bun with pins and had not worried too much about her makeup. The brunette didn't actually plan to attend the event. She needed to look good enough to sneak in and remain unseen. Of course all these things hinged on the appearance of her "father". She opened the car door and slid in fastening her seatbelt.

Then she turned to Puck. Her eyes grew wide and her mouth straight dropped.

"What the fuck is on your face, Puckerman!"

"What?"

"What? Are you kidding me?"

Puck shrugged offended that Santana was making fun of his mustache. He had taken a good part of his day driving around Lima looking for a costume shop that was open in the middle of winter. The best he could find was a Dollar Store that was selling a pack of fake mustaches for children. So he glued one on either side of his upper lip.

"These are legit."

"They're not even even! They are so lopsided it looks like two caterpillars are crawling over your face! Why? Why did I even bother to call you?"

"I totally look like a porn stache sugar daddy! I thought about what we talked about on the phone and thought this would be a great opportunity to expand my pool cleaning business since there will be other adults, like myself, there."

Santana shook her head. "Just drive. I don't want to talk to you for the next ten minutes."

"But Santana, I thought my disguise looked awesome. No one will ever recognize me!"

"Drive."

Puck hit his foot to the gas of his truck and sped off. Santana directed him to the catering hall where the winter formal was taking place. It wasn't that far, but still it wasn't a place McKinley high school students would normally be, this place was swanker.

As they approached the hall, strings of parents were leading what looked like kids up to the main doors of this place. Occasionally she would see someone who looked like their age, but not as many as she thought there would be. The woman at the main office had said families were invited; Santana just hadn't expected actual families to actually stay. Tim had to be one of those crazy uber Christians or something. Maybe a Catholic private school or something. She couldn't imagine Brittany here without her. Hopefully Britt had already gone inside so she wouldn't see Santana and Puck sneaking in.

Exiting the car, she waited till her mustache clad "father" came around the otherside of the truck to offer his arm.

"My beautiful daughter, I am so happy to escort you to your first ever winter formal!" He shouted.

Santana elbowed him in the gut. He grunted. "Stop shouting. Remember we don't want to draw attention."

"Right." Puck straightened back up and continued to walk her towards the door.

After four places in line, Santana noticed that all the parents were handing over some type of card and ID.

"Puck."

Puck didn't respond as he was too busy winking at a mother all the way down the line. Santana elbowed once again. "Puck!"

"Ow! What Santana?"

"We need some kind of card or something to get in!"

"And you didn't get one already?"

"No! I didn't know about it!"

"Well we're shit out of luck then!"

Santana growled and looked around. In front of them a man held the hand of his teenage daughter and a son who looked to be about thirteen. Like seriously this had to be a cult or something if families were attending!

"Tan." Puck touched her arm. "Look!"

He pointed to a door on the side of the building where it looked like people were streaming in and out dressed in white shirts and black slacks. It had to be the catering group.

"Perfect, Puck."

"I know I am." He smirked.

Santana dragged him back to his truck and pushed him up against the door. Puck looked surprised, but not surprisingly turned on by Santana's aggression.

"Oh yeah, baby. I knew the stache would be irresistible."

"No you, ass! Strip!"

"Seriously! These mustaches are worth more than a dollar." He shrugged out of his jacket and began unbuttoning his shirt. Santana grabbed the jacket and threw it into the bed of the truck. Then grabbed his shirt. Sure it was big, but she would have to fix it. She threw the shirt over her own dress and began to button it up.

Puck stopped what he was doing at looked at her. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like? I am going to sneak into the hall as one of the caterers and I am going to use your outfit."

"But I thought-"

"Seriously, Puck, did you think we were going to get it on in the back of your truck right now? Really?"

"Well I thought at least in the front seat we could make out."

"Take your pants off."

As Puck continued to undress, Santana had worked her dress off her body from underneath Puck's shirt. It took a little bit of effort, but Santana had used the pins in her hair to clasp together bunches of material to make Puck's shirt actual fit her body. Sure it wasn't the hottest outfit she had ever worn, but it would have to work for now.

Puck stood there down to his boxers helping Santana hem up the bottom of his pants. Once again she had somehow made the oversized piece of clothing into something manageable.

"So now what am I supposed to do?"

"I don't know. Go find one of those cougars you were so willing to get with earlier."

"Good idea!" Puck exclaimed as he finished helping Santana tighten his suspenders on her.

"How do I look?" Santana asked with a smirk.

"A cross between a real hot lesbian and a very sexually confused caterer?"

"Perfect."

"Go get that Tim fucker."

Santana grinned. She ran towards the side door waiting for someone to come by carrying a tray of food before she offered to help. The guy looked at her funny for only a moment before shrugging. He handed the Latina a tray of cupcakes and told her to put them into the kitchen.

It took her a few times to find the right doors to the kitchen, but she just followed another girl. Quickly she put the cupcakes down and tried to exit the kitchen as soon as possible.

"Young lady!" A voice boomed behind her.

Santana turned slowly. "Yes?"

"You forgot your tie! Come and let me put it on you." A short plump woman said as she bustled over with a black tie.

Santana relaxed and smile graciously as the woman fitted the tie around her neck.

"Thank you so much. I can't believe I forgot it!"

"Not a problem dear. Now why don't you take out this bowl of juice. It goes on the long table at the end of the hall. Out those doors and to the left. And come back here to help me some more."

"Sure." Santana took the bowl and went to where the woman had pointed. She couldn't believe how hard her heart had been pounding. But really what would they do if they realize Santana didn't belong there? It wasn't like they could toss her in jail. They could kick her out with a stern warning.

She pushed open the door and almost dropped the fruit punch.

Or they could get her for child molestation and being a total pervert!

Inside the dance hall were a good hundred young teenagers probably around the ages of twelve to fourteen at the most.

"What the fuck?" Santana murmured as she walked along the back wall very careful to stick to the shadows. Her dark eyes scanned the room looking for her beautiful blonde, but she didn't see Brittany anywhere. Maybe she had gotten the wrong address or texted the wrong text message from Britt's phone. There was no way this was the dance.

Thirteen year olds were dancing all over each other to some Justin Bieber song. While parents calmly watched from the sidelines eating food from their mini plates. Really it was a good thing she hadn't tried to sneak in here with Puck and that mustache. The cops would have definitely been called.

She lingered as long as she could hoping that maybe Brittany would appear and realize this was a mistake. Santana could then walk straight up to her girlfriend and offer her a ride back home…in Puck's truck. Of course some things would have to be explained.

After a few minutes, Santana decided to walk back into the kitchen. The woman who had given her the tie now had the Latina stirring bowls of dip and working on decorations for cookies. Santana quick flipped her phone open.

_B, make it to the dance?_

_Yup. Just got here. _

_Cool?_

_I make everything cool._

Santana normally laughed at Brittany. The blonde always did seem to be the life of the party especially after last year's prom where she got a reputation for dancing with almost everyone's dates – boys and girls. All Santana could think about was if Brittany had actually arrived. Santana picked up another tray of desserts and held them over her shoulder.

"I'm going to see if there needs to be more treats on the table."

"Oh great idea, honey. Don't forget to hurry back."

"Sure." Santana smiled sweetly, but hurried out of the kitchen. She busted through the doors then slowed significantly so no one, especially Brittany, would notice her. Along the back wall covered by shadows, Santana instantly spotted her girlfriend.

She wore a beautiful long orange formal dress which swept the floor softly as she walked. Her hair had been braided on either side and flowed out unrestrained down her back. Santana sucked in a breath. Brittany looked absolutely stunning. Santana placed the tray down absentmindedly with every intention to walk up to Brittany and kiss her. But she reminded herself that she needed to find a certain Tim first.

No other guy stood out. Santana didn't see anyone who matched Tim's description. In fact, Brittany looked like she was alone. A little boy asked Britt to dance and then another. Soon she was surrounded by a group of pre-teenagers dancing to every song. Maybe Tim would come later.

Santana frowned, but went back to work in the kitchen. After another hour, Santana once again drifted to the dancehall to see if Tim had shown his face. Every time Brittany stood to the side, talked to a new person, or just danced. Nothing made sense. Where was Tim? As the night dragged on, Santana noticed Brittany sitting down by herself at a table alone.

Tim wasn't going to show.

Santana knew that the bastard had stood Brittany up. Who would do that?

The Latina threw down the tray of pastries to the table. She quickly straightened her pants and shirt paying special attention to her black tie. Finally she pulled up the suspenders she had stolen from Puck. At least she would be respectable looking. The DJ announced the last song which like all young dances would be a slow song to end the night. The song switched from "Call Me Maybe" to a slower song.

_Come with me_

_My love _

_To the sea_

_The sea of love_

Santana smiled at the song. It wasn't often one heard a slow song like this at a dance for teenagers, but to hear Cat Power doing a cover of The Honeydrippers was just awesome. She needed to get this DJ's number later to see if he could do their dances. The dance floor cleared as kids didn't feel like slow dancing with each other besides there was food to eat and parents to watch them. It wasn't cool to dance like a couple in front of the parental units. Santana ignored the kids looking at her as she approached the seated Brittany.

About two tables away from Brittany, Santana snagged a flower from one of the center pieces. It was cute, but nothing fancy, just a daisy. The girl took a deep breath before calmly tapping Brittany on the shoulder. She couldn't believe Tim would stand her up and invite her to a little kid dance. She would kill him when she found him.

"May I have this dance?"

_I wanna tell you_

_How much _

_I love you_

Brittany looked up. Sparkling ocean blue eyes lit with recognition, surprise, and love. Deep unhindered and abounding love. Santana couldn't help but smile widely as she realized how much Brittany really did love her.

"Yes."

_Do you remember_

_When we met? _

_That's the day_

_I knew you were mine._

The blonde took the flower and tucked it behind her ear before taking Santana's offered hand. They walked to the middle of the dance floor. Brittany's arms wrapped easily around Santana's neck while the brunette pulled her close by the waist. Their bodies naturally meshed together as they swayed back and forth. The girl in the beautiful orange dress allowed herself to be led around the dance floor by a shorter girl dressed like a boy in suspenders. Nothing could be more perfect.

_I wanna tell you_

_How much_

_I love you_

Santana sung softly in Brittany's ear to the music. The dance floor faded and they never noticed the parents softly calling their children away from the floor. Instead emboldened by the two girls dancing, a few of the other teens began to drag their partners to the center of the hall to finish out the slow song.

_Come with me_

_My love _

_To the sea_

_The sea of love_

_I wanna tell you_

_How much_

_I love you_

The song ended and the two girls pulled apart from each other. Brittany still smiling and Santana bit her bottom lip nervous that her girlfriend would be upset for busting in on the dance.

"Love you." The Latina mouthed in the space between them.

"Thank you." Brittany kissed her girlfriend lightly on the lips.

"You don't mind that I crashed?"

"Nope. You're the best part of any night especially when we get to dance."

"Wanna get out of here?"

"Yeah. Take me home?"

"Of course. I am a gentleman." Santana said with a smirk looking down at her outfit.

"A perfect gentleman." Brittany agreed then added playfully.

Santana laughed as she offered Brittany her arm. They linked up and proceeded to exit the building. She would deal with Tim later; right now the only thing that mattered was Brittany.

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><p><strong>Thanks guys for the adds! I would love to have some feedback since this is a much different case than the first one. Have a nice rest of the week!<strong>


	13. InTimidation

**Hey again guys! Not gonna lie, I might have panicked a little after getting no reviews after chap 11 and the unholy trinity romping and I thought oh no! But it was nice to see familiar names and a new one say some really nice things. **

**In case it wasn't clear, yes, Tim is the case Santana is working. I know it wasn't the same type of case as the first one, but I like experimenting with voice and trying hard to keep my voices in character so I wanted to work with San specifically and intro more chars like Quinn and Puck. **

**Finally, this is the last part of The Serious Case of Tim and probably of this story. It's been a blast! I will speak more about this at the end of the chapter, but for now, enjoy!**

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><p><strong>XIII. InTimidation<strong>

They spun around the parking lot are few more time singing songs to each other and waving good-bye to all of Brittany's new friends from the dance. Apparently a few boys had given her their number and one girl had tried to talk to Santana. The two girls were giddy as they ran through the cars and families on their way out. Only a few parents looked at them disapprovingly, but most smiled pleasantly.

In a dark corner between two limos parked and unoccupied, Santana pressed up against Brittany. The two girls kissed until they felt the limo shake to life. Brittany grabbed Santana's hand so they could escape before anyone saw the two girls making out.

"Take me home, San."

"Sure."

Santana paused and looked around the parking lot for her red baby. But it was nowhere in sight.

"San?"

The Latina looked around trying to remember how she had gotten to the dance. Suddenly it dawned on her that she wasn't even wearing the clothes she had come in.

"Shit. Puck."

"Puck?" Brittany asked confused. "Is he here for the dance too?"

"Sortof…" Santana trailed off. She didn't want to talk about how she had employed the boy in her scheme to spy on Brittany. In fact, Santana wasn't all that sure Brittany had pieced it together. At the moment Santana wanted to take her girl home and have a nice night in front of the tv cuddled up with her girlfriend.

"Neat!" Brittany exclaimed. "Isn't that his truck?"

She pointed down the parking lot towards the opposite corner of where Puck had originally parked. Strange.

"Yeah. I think so." They linked arms once again and headed in that direction. Most of the cars and families were now pulling out of the lot. It didn't take very long till the girls were practically at the truck bed. But a small grunting noise stopped them both.

Britt looked to Santana. "Is he there you think?"

Another grunt, this time more like a woman's moan. Oh he was not!

Santana couldn't believe it! She stormed towards the bed of the truck and hopped on the back so she could see who was rolling around. Strapped across Puck's back into a kind of sash was Santana's dress. The woman was wearing his jacket and making the most ridiculous sounds.

"Puck!" Santana yelled and hit her hand against panel of the truck. He jumped four feet in the air and scrambled to cover himself with the dress. That dress would have to be burned. Gross. The woman slowly got up and smiled.

"Well Mr. Lopez, I will be sure to call your-" The woman paused and waited for Puck to complete the sentence.

Puck smirked. Half of his fake mustache had shifted to the bottom of his chin. He looked ridiculous. "Pool cleaning service. And ask for my son Puck. He will set it all up."

"Oh? Puck is it? And does Puck happen to have the same kind of…expertize with…pool cleaning poles?"

"Even more." Puck winked at her again. Santana groaned and rolled her eyes. She was definitely burning that dress when she got home.

"Expect a call from me very shortly."

The Latina gave the woman a look, but moved out her way as she dismounted from the truck bed. She walked away, but not before throwing Puck a kiss.

Santana didn't even bother to wait until the woman was out of hearing distance. "Really? You are a pig and she's old enough to be your grandmother. Nice, Puck. Real classy."

"You're just jealous the Puckster gets more lady loving than you do."

"Please. You wish you could even hear the noises coming from my room when I am getting my lady loving on."

Puck opened his mouth but shut it quickly. Santana definitely had a point. He would give his left nut to see Santana and Brittany for even a minute.

"We're ready to go."

Puck nodded and tightened the dress around his torso into a tighter sash. "Oh hey, Britt! Nice to see you!"

"Hey Puck!" Brittany returned the goofy grin. Despite knowing Santana and Puck had a history, she enjoyed every time they fought because they sound more like brother and sister. "It's cool don't worry about having sex with that grandmother. You can have all the wrinkly ones. We'll stick with the hot young ladies."

Puck's mouth hung open again with no response. These girls would be the death of him.

Santana smirked as she waited for Brittany to open her door. The blonde held open the truck door and held her hand out to help Santana up. The two girls barely acknowledged the presence of the boy as they held hands. Santana sat in the console between them. Her fingers gently stroked the back of Brittany's knuckles. Britt leaned in and rested her head on her girlfriend's shoulder.

"Thanks for coming to dance with me."

"Anything for you."

Puck cleared his throat to remind the girls that he wasn't just their chauffeur. When it gained no response, Puck resorted to talking.

"So did you find that Tim guy and mess his night up? I mean that's why you two are all love-y dove and making with the nice, right?"

Santana froze; her fingers hovered over Brittany's hands. She hadn't exactly told Brittany why she had shown up randomly at the dance. Brittany moved away from Santana's shoulder and sat up so she could look at both Puck and Santana. It wasn't often the trusting cheerleader expressed anger, especially at Santana, but she thought San had given her permission to go to the dance.

"Is that why you came here tonight? Because of Tim?" Brittany asked, her voice guarded and defensive.

"Brittany…I just thought…well I wasn't really thinking." Santana tried to explain but quickly became tongue-tied.

"I thought you trusted me. You told me that it was fine and you wouldn't care if I went to the dance, so why would you follow to harass Tim?"

"It's not that I don't trust you, B. I don't trust him! I haven't even met him or seen him or know what he looks like or how he treats you or if he wants to move in on my girl!" Santana pleaded. "And when he texted you earlier I just thought that I could follow and see what he looked like and if…"

"And if what, Santana?" Brittany used her full name. "If you want to meet him so badly then you can. He texted me during the dance and apologized for standing me up. He wanted to meet me tomorrow at the park. Instead how about you go and do whatever you want to do."

Puck had been quiet. Very quiet. He had never imagined the two girls fighting or witnessing it. Awkward.

"Hey, Tan, we're at your house. Need me to drop off Britt?"

"No."

"Yes." Britt spoke over Santana's dumbstruck expression. No matter how they fought, Santana would always drive Britt home and they could make it up for the night.

"Britt?" Santana looked at her girlfriend. "You're not going to spend the night?"

"Two in the afternoon, Santana. Tim will be there, I will not be." Brittany looked over Santana to Puck. "Can you drop me off at my place before you go home, Puck?"

"Sure…" Puck said quietly hoping Santana wouldn't attack him next.

"Britt, please don't. I mean we can still be together tonight. I said I was sorry. I really don't have to meet him. I trust you. Please…" Santana begged now completely ignoring Puck.

"I don't want to see you until you meet Tim." Brittany said with an air of finality. She opened the truck door and climbed out. She offered her hand to Santana to help her get out. The Latina glared, but she didn't reject Brittany's hand. Taking it with a solid glare, Santana climbed down from the truck and stood there awkwardly looking at Brittany. Perhaps she thought Brittany would come to her senses and walk up to her stairs.

"Lopez, I want my clothes back too. I borrowed them from my uncle and he'll want them, but don't wash them. He's weird about that stuff." Puck called out.

Santana tried not to make a face at that latest bit of information.

"B?"

But Brittany had climbed back into the truck. Her blue eyes turned to her girlfriend standing in the driveway, but she didn't change her mind. The truck reversed out and drove away down the street. Santana couldn't believe Britt had left her like that. Perhaps she had deserved it, but still.

Fuck.

She had really fucked up this time. The brown haired girl kicked at some snow with Puck's combat boots before walking into her house. Alone.

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><p>Santana awoke fairly early in the morning. A fresh layer of snow coated the ground outside the house, but she could barely pay attention to her surroundings. All she could think about was the fight from the previous night. Why had she followed Brittany to the dance? She should have trust her girlfriend.<p>

More pressing thoughts consisted of what the brunette should do.

She looked out the window for the five hundredth time pacing.

Again, she flicked open her phone and dialed.

Again, the phone went straight to Brittany's voice mail.

"Hey, Britt, I know you're still mad at me because you still aren't answering my calls, but I wanted to say I was sorry again. Could you please give me a call back? Please, I don't like it when we fight."

The phone beeped and asked if she wanted to rerecord the message, but Santana declined with a sigh of resignation. She looked to the clock on the wall just to double check the time. Brittany's words echoed in the brunette's head. She didn't want to see Santana until she finally met Tim. Obviously Brittany had been mad.

"Shit."

Santana pulled on some boots sturdy enough for romping through the park, a coat, and warm clothes. She wrapped a red and white cheerleading scarf around her neck and a matching winter hat. At least she could look cute and definitely scare off Tim.

No. She had to behave herself now. In the distance, Santana could imagine a whip cracking. Yes, she knew she was whipped, but she loved Brittany too much to let this Tim ruin their relationship.

She flung open the door and stepped onto the fresh snow and began to trek her way up the street towards the park. A few of her neighbors were out shoveling their driveways or children were running around throwing snow and generally having a great time. Despite her time on the beaches of unknown island #whatever, Santana had missed the snow, but she couldn't enjoy it today. Her dark eyes kept scanning the horizon for the swingset in the distance.

It wasn't long before she saw the swing set covered in snow, the merry-go-round also blanketed, and the slide. The frozen lake was just a little bit beyond and not too far a group of kids were using one of the hills to sled down. Santana frowned as she looked around.

No Tim.

What a surprise.

She had never thought Brittany was crazy before, but maybe Tim was just an imaginary friend. Santana had been gone for a few weeks and maybe Britt had no choice, but to make up someone to fill in all the holes in her time. The swing had been covered in snow, but that didn't deter the girl as she swept aside the white powder to sit. Gently, she rocked back and forth holding the chains to balance. Her eyes sweeping from left to right to make sure she didn't miss the arrival of this Tim, but he never showed. Instead a smaller figure made its way towards the swingset.

The figure turned out to be a boy about thirteen years old and covered in head to toe with snow gear, like Santana. Not one to make small talk or acknowledge another presence, Santana continued to gently swing even when the kid sat down next to her.

She didn't look at him directly, but could tell he was dark haired and self-assured especially when he started to swing without acknowledging Santana's presence either. Perhaps because she was used to getting attention, it annoyed her that he was using her same tactic. It didn't seem fair. But she didn't want to be the first to say hi, so she swung up higher. The kid did the same.

A slight frown dipped across her plump cold lips. Who did this kid think he was?

Again she started to swing higher and again he mimicked her.

Finally she turned and looked at him. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing." He answered back right away. The response made Santana frown even more. Could nothing work out today? Tim once again a no show and now dealing with this punk on her swingset.

"Whatever."

"Whatever."

They both said at the same time. At that, Santana huffed and began to slow her swing down so she could dismount and stomp her way back home. She would tell Brittany that Tim never showed up.

She touched ground and straightened her coat out readjusting her scarf so she wouldn't be too cold walking home. About to make her way back, she felt something hard hit her in the back.

"Ouch!"

The Latin spun around so quickly that her hat flew off her head in the process, the kid was standing there holding another snowball in his hand ready to throw and a devious grin. This kid did not know what he was in for. Santana had had the worst few days of her life since coming home from vacation, well not the worst, but Brittany being made definitely qualified for something like the end of the world.

"I will kill you." Santana glowered. The kid didn't balk. Instead he threw the snowball in his head with that wicked smile again. She yelled as she felt incredibly cold showers of snow fall all around her and into her face. She screamed, "I will kill you!"

The Latina dipped her glove covered hands into the snow and made her own weapon flinging it at him. But he was too fast. He ducked and ran away laughing with another snowball already flying at the girl. Santana avoided it this time at the same time throwing another one. This time she made a direct hit against his back.

"You throw like a girl!" He shouted.

"Are you kidding me?" Santana snorted unsure if she was angry or amused at the ballsy kid. "Get out from behind that tree and see if I can still throw like a girl."

To make her point, Santana rolled up another snowball and flung it against the truck. It shattered and sprayed at the impact, but didn't hit the boy hiding behind it. Santana rolled a few more balls from behind her hiding place, another tree about twenty feet away.

"No way am I coming out. You look crazy!"

Santana paused. Her hair flew all over and she had snow coating her entire body. Not only that, but she now had a stack of snowballs about knee high. Maybe she did look a little crazy. But it was the boy's fault and of course Tim for making her feel like this. She just wanted Brittany to forgive her and never talk about Tim again.

She flung another snowball this time much harder.

"Hey!" He shouted and lobbed one back at her which she nimbly avoided around her tree trunk. What was she doing? This was crazy.

Just about to call the whole thing off, Santana squinted her eyes and saw a group of kids with a tall figure between them. They all carried snowballs and were bearing down the hill at a dead run towards them. She couldn't make out the tall one's face because he was wearing a full mask and great deal of clothing to keep warm.

"Tim?" She asked out loud, but couldn't pursue the thought as the man and his friends, all about the same as the boy began to open fire on both her and the swing boy.

"Shit!" She yelped as snowball plummeted from the sky around her. Her eyes glanced over to see the other boy under the same fate. She cupped her mouth and shouted, "Run!"

They didn't hesitate as they flew from the trees and made towards the plastic castle behind the swing set. Occasionally, Santana would turn to throw a few of the snowballs she had grabbed from her original hiding place and throw them at the four boys and the man behind them. Like seriously she could not catch a break today! Both the boy and Santana ended up panting behind the plastic castle on either side exchanging snowballs at their assailants.

"You know these guys?" Santana asked breathlessly panting next to the little boy. He wore a jacket and had dark hair, dark eyes, and that mischievous grin on his face. He only nodded 'yes' in response. "Great. Of all the days to come to the park, I have to pick the day when everyone decides to have a snowball fight."

"Kinda fun, right?" He asked with that smirk on his face.

"Yeah…" Santana mumbled. "I guess you're right."

A snowball against the plastic showered over their heads. They both looked at each other and picked up a few more snowballs in their hands.

"I wanna get the tall one." The boy said.

"I've got the punks on the left." Santana returned the grin now. "Ready? Go!"

They turned from their cover and began to fire in rapid succession towards the kids and the tall stranger in head to toe snow gear. It made their assailants peal back into cover and give Santana and the boy a few seconds to rest.

"Nice throw." Santana found herself saying as she turned back under cover. She had seen the boy hit the tall one squarely in the chest. It had to be Tim, he was far too tall to be the same age as the boys.

"They're probably going to rush us soon. I've played with them before. They like to let people get entrenched then storm and overwhelm them."

"Then we've got to move." Santana said looking around them. There was a hill they could run up and pepper them from above. It would definitely give them a tactic position. "If we can get up to that hill I think we can hold them off and they won't be able to get us without getting pelted by a thousand snowballs."

The kid looked up the hill and nodded. "Great idea!"

"I'll cover you for a few moments. You make for the hill and then cover me when I make my way up."

"Okay." He nodded and stuck his hand out. "Good luck."

"Thanks you too." Santana made a pile of snowballs and when she felt ready she turned to the boy. "Ready? Go!"

The boy took off at a sprint. At the same time, Santana turned and began to throw as many snowballs towards the four kids and the tall guy. For a few minutes, they were unable to get any closer. Santana glanced up the hill and saw her new found friend scaling it. Good. She had just run out of snowballs. Not a lot of time, she too began to sprint towards the hill. The boy had just crested it and had begun to fling snowballs behind her towards the boys running after her. But an expression on the kid's face made Santana turn around.

The dark clad figure had begun to sprint through the thick snow. Santana was athletic, but even she was struggling in the snow field up the hill. But this guy seemed to plow right through it heading straight towards Santana. What the hell? She frowned and tried to run faster. Her friend at the top was now raining snowballs at the guy, but nothing seemed to faze him.

Maybe Tim would kill her?

She could feel the presence gaining ground on her, but she couldn't look back now. She hit the hill and began to climb up.

"Watch out!" The boy at the top yelled down to her, but it was too late. She felt hands on her legs dragging her down. Santana kicked back at the guy. He seemed unfazed. Instead he continued to yank at her pants. Santana could see nothing except eyes through the mask and the dark clothing. She looked back up to her new friend. He was still trying to hit the guy with snowballs.

"Get out of here!" Santana yelled up. If Tim was trying to kill her at least she wouldn't let him get the kid too.

"Let her go!" Instead the boy launched himself from the top towards them. He hit both Santana and the tall man grabbing at her. They all grunted and rolled down the hill. Limbs hitting limbs and bodies bumping into bodies till they landed at the bottom in a heap in the snow.

Santana groaned and felt all her body already bruising up from the impact. Worst day ever. She opened her eyes and saw the kid a few feet away laying on his back. Where was Tim? Before she could complete the thought, the dark figure jumped on top of Santana and pinned her to the snow.

"Get off!" Santana yelled, but the figure had pinned her by her wrists above her head and straddled her torso. No amount of struggling freed the Latina. She felt anxious as she gazed into blue eyes through the mask. Her voice didn't break even though she felt overwhelmed by the body pinning her to the ground. "Get off before I cut you Lima Heights style."

The stranger said nothing, but continued to hold her there.

"Tim! TIM!" A voice shouted in the distance. "Tim! Where are you!"

Santana struggled even more thinking the body would now have to get off of her to respond to the voice. But nothing moved.

Well that was Santana and her attacker didn't move. The little boy she had been playing with and running around dodging snowballs with hopped up from the snow. "I'm over here mom!"

A mother came rushing over towards them gave her son a quick look up and down. "Tim! I thought that was you tumbling down the hill! What were you thinking? We have that commercial to shoot tomorrow. I knew I shouldn't have let you come to the park."

"Mom, be cool. My friends are here. Besides I was just playing with Brittany."

Santana's mouth dropped. Tim was a thirteen year old boy. The same thirteen year old boy she had probably spent the past hour playing with and Brittany was here?

Finally the body on top of her released its grip and stood up. The black mask fell to the ground on Santana's still laying body. Blonde hair spilled around as Brittany offered her hand out to Tim's mom.

"Nice to see you again Mrs. Tim's mom." Brittany said cheerfully.

The woman smiled gently and took Brittany's hand. "Please Brittany, I've told you many times to just call me Charlotte. Sorry I didn't realize you were here with Tim."

"It's okay we were playing."

"Well thanks again for agreeing to play with him this afternoon and getting his friends to come to the park. It's hard now that he's not in school anymore."

"Not a problem. Maybe we can set up another playdate soon?"

"Sure, Brittany, I will give you a call." Tim's mother turned to her son. "Say bye to Ms. Brittany. And then we are leaving."

Tim waited till his mother had walked away before kicking at some snow. "It sucks when my mom comes around. She ruins all our fun."

"It's okay! Besides you have your commercial. Sorry they didn't show it at the dance."

"Yeah it's whatev. Sorry I didn't go to the dance. I was angry they weren't gonna show my tape so me and my mom fought."

"It's cool. Maybe next time."

"Yeah that'd be fun."

Santana stood up now finally brushing herself off. Her mouth still didn't function properly probably because she had yet to process the situation happening here. "But you're like thirteen and Britt and you and the snowball and the swing and…"

"You're not making a lot of sense, San." Brittany finally turned around to smile at her girlfriend.

"You know, you're pretty cool. Thanks for having my back today. I'm Tim by the way." Tim stuck his hand out. Santana shook it still in a daze. "Maybe we can play again soon."

"Yeah…maybe…" Santana muttered.

"TIM!" His mother called.

"Gotta go before she kills me!" He took off across the snow leaving the two girls together.

"That was fun!" Brittany said pleasantly. She moved in to kiss Santana's cheek, but the Latina stopped her.

"Hold up! Tim is like a little kid!"

"I guess. What's your point?" Brittany asked confused about why they couldn't kiss right now.

"You made me so worried!"

"I told you there was nothing to worry about! You just made up all these things about him!"

"What about his friends from the lacrosse team?"

"You mean the guy you invited to the party? That was Tim's assistant coach. He also plays, but helps his dad coach the little boys' team."

"So he's just…"

"Tim. He's just Tim. Hope you don't mind if he still helps us solve cases sometimes."

Santana started to laugh. She should have known.

"What about dressing up like a serial killer?"

"What this?" Brittany looked down at her outfit. "Lord Tubbington took my snow pants, so I had to improvise and the mask looked like fun plus great protection from snowballs!"

"You're perfect." Santana smiled softly before pulling Brittany in for a soft kiss on the lips. The blonde smiled, but pulled Santana harder in till they both fell back down into the snow. This time Santana straddled her girlfriend and hovered above her. Dark hair falling around her shoulders, while golden hair spilled all around the snow. "I love you."

"I love you too." Brittany beamed as she spoke the words before pulling Santana back down for another kiss.

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><p><strong>Thus ends The Serious Case of Tim. Hope you guys enjoyed it! I had fun writing more Brittana stuff. I would love some feedback on the case and your opinions. I have been batting around the idea of writing a LT:P-EYE story set in the future, it will def be darker with a serious case, but it would be a new story. Or I could think about writing another of these light hearted cases. So if you guys could seriously offer some feedback on what you'd like to read next, I would really appreciate it. Thanks a lot! And have a lovely rest of the week!<strong>


	14. Third Case Missing Grades

**Thank you for the feedback from the last case, the adds, and alerts! Pounding of Native Drums, I have no answer to your question, but I agree, LT should def be on the case! Hahaha**

**I've been racking my brain and pouring over new ideas all week. So I hope you're ready! Back by popular demand, a few responses, my friend's insistence that I don't destroy my cute lovely Brittana, and a magical unicorn that told me to write at least one more case in my dreams, I now present one more LT: P-Eye case for your reading, mystery, and smut loving pleasure!**

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><p><strong>XIV. Missing Grades<strong>

"Sure Madame President, right this way."

"Why thank you First Lady."

Santana opened the door to the student council room located two doors down from Principal Figgins office and waited for Brittany to pass through. The room held a long table, a few students, a Jenny (that fucking vice president Santana was sure was trying to get into her girlfriend's pants, a board of ideas, and a schedule for things they still had to complete before the end of school. The end of school was rapidly approaching. In fact, approaching way too fast.

"Brittany…" Jenny stood up with a bit of hesitation upon seeing the student council's overprotective girlfriend glaring at her from behind the blonde's back. "Here are the announcements and things we need you to do before the end of the day. I already set up the announcement room for you this morning since you seemed to be running a little late."

Brittany took the packet of papers and smirked at the last comment, but didn't account for her whereabouts.

"We were busy." Santana answered curtly with a satisfied look on her face. Quickie in the back of her car more like it, but Jenny didn't need to know all the details of their relationship.

"Thanks, Jenny! I will see you later after school for the meeting!" Brittany said enthusiastically before heading to the back door of the room where the intercom was set up.

Santana lingered.

"Yeah, _thanks_, Jenny."

"Santa-"

"Hush-" Santana interjected. "I still have my eyes on you. Now scram. My girl doesn't need you around right now. She's gots some announcing to do and she doesn't need you trying to be the over excited VP up her shit."

Jenny took the hint and gathered her things. The girl looked back once more, but again Santana made a threatening gesture. Jenny took off meeting someone else down the hallway. Good, she could make new friends.

The backdoor opened and a blonde head popped out. "San, babe, you coming to help me announce or what?"

"Be right there." Santana made sure to close the door to the office after the rest of the student council losers had left. Really who would want to be in student government? Brittany definitely earned it and was perfect for the job, but to be anything else than the president just seemed like the participation ribbons given out to everyone who didn't win first place. What could Santana say? Brittany was perfect and always the champion.

Student body president announced the events of the day, the sports scores for McKinley, and any other important things that needed to be told to the students during homeroom. Most times the students didn't care two shits about what was announced, but it did give the two girls some time by themselves.

Brittany had just started the announcements speaking directly into the intercom for the school. Santana stood against the closed door and smiled as she heard her girlfriend's voice over the school's PA system.

_Sign-ups and information regarding senior graduation should be picked up by the end of the week._

Chocolate colored eyes glanced down to the papers Jenny had handed to her girlfriend and for the first time realized they were written in crayon. That bitch really was moving in on her girl. Whatever. She knew Britt would never go for that. Besides, Santana had learned her lesson that past winter. In fact, she had learned a lot of things in the months from January all the way up to May.

The two cheerleaders had been inseparable and working nonstop to make sure Santana got into her school in New York and that Brittany would pass all her classes. Competition for glee was heating up which meant seeing more of the club. They were also getting ready for Nationals with Sue and the cheerios. They had been very busy at school.

_The baseball team lost again 0-15 while girls' softball team qualified for county tournament this weekend with another victory._

Of course, they were still rocking LT:P-Eye. And yes, even Santana Lopez now called Lord Tubbington's Private Eye by the nickname Tim had given it. Not all that surprising considering that Tim spent more time hanging out with Santana than he did with Brittany now. Since both Tim and Santana had aspirations for stardom and were naturally sarcastic, Tim and Santana had taken to each other quickly.

At first, Brittany had been very pleased with their friendship that was until she saw the terrible influence they had on each other. One time she had texted Santana to find out where the two were hanging out so she could come chill after student council business. After no response, she had meandered over to the park and found Santana issuing out orders to a pack of thirteen year old boys with instructions on how to swindle old people out of candy they brought to feed the animals and the best way to pick up girls. Brittany wasn't sure, but she could have sworn she was Santana's only girlfriend so she wasn't too clear on how good her advice would be. But when Santana started to give them advice on how to get a girl off, Brittany knew for certain it was God's honest truth since Santana was _very _good at getting Britt to cum.

Santana didn't use Britt's name, but her descriptions were incredibly explicit. After that incident a few mothers started to regulate the park visits and conveniently positioned themselves into areas where they could overhear the Latina.

_Money and slips for prom are due next Tuesday and can be delivered to the Student Council office._

This invasion of playtime prompted them to move their play time to other places. They had helped solve a missing bench mystery at the mall and Tim had gotten them a case at his private school. Lord Tubbington had somehow secured them a case involving a trapped cat in a high tree branch. Since Brittany hadn't been around, Santana had called Tim to come help. The two spent the next three hours attempting to scale the tree to no avail. Finally Brittany had showed up scaled the tree in three minutes, had the cat, and landed on her feet with barely breaking a sweat.

Tim and Santana had spent the entire time watching her with their jaws hanging. Lord Tubbington finally slunk from his perch on Brittany's window and strolled away with the rescued feline. Santana had known LT was a hound dog, but even she had to admit that LT had game in spades.

Later that evening, Santana had expressed how sexy she thought Brittany had been, but this time without Tim around.

_Finally good luck to the boys and girls soccer teams as they board the bus for states today. _

Brittany took her finger off the button and continued to sit there for a moment. Her cerulean eyes met the dark ones that had so calmly and lovingly watched her the entire time.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"First Lady, I was wondering if you had a date to the prom because forms and money are due soon and I wanna make sure I snatch up the hottest most wonderful girl in school before someone else asks her." Brittany asked with smile on her face and bit her bottom lip waiting for a response. Obviously they had been planning on going together, but she had never officially asked. And she wanted it to be special for her girlfriend.

"Why Madame President," Santana could feel her heart flittering in her chest. She took a step closer to the blonde so they were practically pressed up against each other. The material of their matching cheerios outfits barely brushed, but all Santana could feel was her pulse. Then she did something she thought she would never do. Without Brittany knowing, she slipped her hand along the desk to the intercom and pressed in the button to speak.

She remembered last year's prom and how Brittany had supported her when she felt the entire world stood against her. Santana also remembered how publically she had left Brittany on Fondue For Two and had not even given the blonde a change to ask her out to prom. But she no longer felt afraid. In fact, her heart raced, but her mind was set.

With the button pushed in, Santana looked directly into those eyes and spoke loud and clear for the whole student body to hear. "Brittany S. Pierce, I would love to go to prom with you." She removed her finger from the button just in time to catch a jumping Brittany.

Their lips crashed together as their bodies hit the door.

"Really? You mean it?"

"Of course! Who else would I want to go with?"

"I don't know…Quinn maybe or maybe Rachel now that you have that picture of her in your locker." Brittany teased with a smirk on her face pulling back from the kiss.

Santana scrunched her face. "Whatever. It doesn't mean anything."

"Clearly it does since it's been up for a week just hanging there in your locker without any graffiti on it."

"I could deface it if you really want me to." Santana purred against the blonde's lips.

"You mean you want to draw a mustache on her?" Brittany responded sliding a leg between Santana till she felt her knee hit the wooden door. Santana hitched herself up on the knee.

"If that's what you want me to do." Santana leaned into Brittany's body and planted kisses along her jawline.

"Maybe not a mustache, you might like that too much." Brittany slid her fingers underneath the cheerios uniform to the edge of San's spankies and rubbed her fingertips along the brunette's inner thighs. Santana held back a moan by biting her lower lip.

"Are you implying that I like boys?" Santana asked her voice dropping to a husky tone. Her legs tingled at the feel of long fingers stroking her inner thighs and teasing at the edges of her uniform.

Brittany turned her head to capture Santana's lips in a hungry kiss. Their tongues teased dipping in and out of opened mouths. She bit down on Santana's lip where the Latina had been biting down only a few moments before.

"No, but maybe that you like girls with mustaches besides you always mention her _man _hands-" Brittany put greater emphasis on the word by yanking down the red material underneath the cheerio uniform. Her fingers ran up and down Santana's panties underneath feeling wetness through the material.

"Fuck." Santana moaned again, but smirked into another kiss. She couldn't let Brittany keep taking control of their romps. With great willpower, the little she had remaining, Santana pushed Britt back away from the door. The surprise on Britt's face was priceless. "I prefer my girls blonde, tall, and incredibly sexy."

Brittany didn't have time to respond. Her ass pressed against the back of the table in the small room. Santana had wrapped on leg around her waist and pushed into her girlfriend. Brittany pushed back again this time Santana gave in and completely wrapped both legs around her girlfriend. A few things clattered to the floor, but neither girl had time or patience to notice. Off the ground, Santana let Britt take all her body weight. The blonde finally yanked down the spankies all the way with Santana's panties. Naked underneath her cheerleading uniform, Santana smirked. "Love you so much, Britt."

No time to respond, Brittany ran her hands up San's neck and pulled her tight pony tail out. Brittany maneuvered her hands between them and once again began to run her fingers up and down her girlfriend's core this time without the obstructing material in the way. Santana's back arched as she tightened her legs around Britt's waist trying to increase the friction between them.

Seeing the look of complete pleasure on her girlfriend's face, Brittany pulled her hand back. Making sure those dark eyes never left hers, Brittany brought her fingers up to her mouth. Slowly she licked her girlfriend's cum with a devious intentions in her blue gaze. Santana bucked unable to control the currents of heat flooding her body. How could Brittany always turn her on like this? She moaned uncontrollably as Britt stuck another finger in her mouth.

"Fuck, baby, please." Santana pleaded as she grasped Brittany's hand by the wrist and pushed it back down underneath her skirt.

Brittany nodded and loved the way Santana's fingers caressed her wrist so softly and yet with that sense of urgency. She needed Britt. The blonde pushed her hand back between the Latina's spread legs. San sucked in a deep breath as she began to ride Brittany's fingers. The blonde leaned into her girlfriend's body pinned and suspended against the wall.

"Who are you going to prom with?" Brittany asked in a whispered against Santana's spot right beneath the left side of her jaw where she knew her girlfriend went crazy at the slightest brush. Santana could hardly breathe much less focus on anything other than Brittany's fingers. But when she felt those perfect lips brush up against her throat on her spot, she tensed; her body felt like it was exploding. An orgasm already vibrated through her, but Brittany didn't stop. She curled her fingers and rubbed against the brunette's cilt. Santana's body shook as it prepared for another one. "Say my name."

She couldn't think, but she wanted, needed so badly to cum again. Santana opened her mouth right as Brittany began to pump her fingers in and out of her dripping pussy again. "Brittany. Fuck. Britt!"

Breathing hard, Santana buried her face into Brittany's messy hair in the crook of her neck. Slowly Britt pulled her fingers back and just held Santana while they both caught their breath.

"Think we can make class before the bell?" Brittany asked quietly.

"Nope." Santana smirked devilishly.

"Why?"

"Cause we've still got round two."

"I love round two." Brittany said into another kiss. The Latina pulled at the girl's golden locks while her other hand pressed against the center of her chest. About to slip her hand down to pull up the top of Britt's uniform, Santana's hand stopped dead in its tracks at the sound of a door knock.

"Teen lesbians! Open this door right now!" The unmistakable voice of Principal Figgins called from outside.

"Shit."

"Uh-oh." Brittany threw Santana's clothes back at her girlfriend. She quickly dressed herself while Britt attempted to smooth down her uniform.

"Open this door immediately!"

Britt was the first to reach the door. Principal Figgins stood outside dabbing his brow with a handkerchief and then using it at a makeshift fan. It looked like he was about to pass out.

"Oh thank everything President McKinley ever touched that you two are dressed!" Figgins let out a sigh of relief.

Both cheerleaders looked at each other.

"Not the most appropriate wording to use to female student, Principal Figgins." Santana spoke guardedly. Had he heard them in the room?

Brittany on the other hand was still caught up with a fascination with what Figgins had first said. "President McKinley touched me once. I mean not with his hands since they were painted on, but with his eyes. Sometimes when I am walking by his portrait I know that his eyes are following me just like on Scooby-Doo. You know that one episode when the gang is-"

"LOPEZ! PIERCE! FIGGINS OFFICE NOW!" Sue Sylvester burst through the doors of the student council office. All three people jumped at the sound of Sue's voice including Figgins. "Oh good you're here Principal Figgins, we can move this debauchery to your office then."

"Of course, Sue, that's what I was just about to suggest. Come on girls."

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><p>Santana sat next to Brittany in the principal 's office. She had wanted to reach across to hold her girlfriend's hand, but considering the reason why they were suddenly called in, the Latina quelled her desire.<p>

"I have never in my life heard a more ridiculous set of announcements in the morning. First the congratulations to other teams that have done mediocre at best and could barely call themselves athletes!" Sue said pointing at Figgins and then at Brittany. "All recaps of the day and all important news should come directly from my segment of Sue's Corner not this drivel!"

"Sue…" Figgins warned. The girls remained silent.

"And what kind of announcement splits up the sports and doesn't mention the cheerios? I have a contract, Figgins, if you'd like to pull it out. Don't bother I know it's section 5B clause 453 which states that all athletic directions should first be consulted by me. Therefore the school announcements would also fall under my jurisdiction!"

"Sue…"

"Finally! What kind of school program prompts the use of the intercom system to titillate and stimulate the already over sexualized mind of the student body? Those few seconds of these two getting kinky behind the mic were enough for at least half the boy population to ask to be excused from the bathroom and almost the entire female population to walk over to that ridiculous excuse of a school guidance councilor and pick up her pamphlet aptly titled: I Think I Was Sexually Aroused By Another Girl: Does that Make Me a Lesbian?"

"Yes, Sue! Thank you. That is why we brought the girls into to talk about. We can address your other issues at another time. The school lawyer has expressly forbidden me to pull out your contract without first calling him and three other law firms."

Sue bristled at the last comment, but didn't argue. The girls on the other hand looked at each other sideways. Had the intercom been on during their little sexcapade in the office?

"Now girls before you get worried, we only heard about two seconds of your…" Figgins cleared his throat. "…Copulation exchange."

"But San and I weren't playing cops and robbers so I don't understand how you heard us roleplaying." Brittany said confused. "Besides we didn't have any handcuffs or hats. Sometimes we dress up in hats only. It makes it easier to-"

Santana quickly put her hand out and squeezed Brittany's thigh with a look. "B."

"What?"

Figgins' face revealed his distress at all the extra information. "Girls, we have had you on our radar long before this incident. A few times the teachers have reported that you two are caught in strange places around the school, but hardly enough for us to take any action. Unfortunately, after this incident, we can no longer ignore a few facts about your academic standings in the school."

"What are you talking about? We are passing all our classes. Graduation is like in a few weeks and whatever we do behind closed doors is our business and should have no bearing on our records." Santana snapped.

Sue remained surprisingly silent.

"Ms. Lopez, you currently have nothing holding you back from graduating, but it has come to the school's attention by an anonymous source that Ms. Pierce has completed no classes at all and should really be considered a freshman."

"What?" The two girls and Sue said at the same time.

"That makes no sense."

"Preposterous I would never accept such behavior from my cheerios!"

"Does this mean I am fifteen again? Do I have to take Ms. Birch's Geometry class again? She didn't let me play with the blocks."

"Ladies, ladies please one at a time." Figgins tried to navigate the three voices coming at him.

"Figgins! I would never allow one of my cheerios to drop all her grades like that. Something must be wrong in the system!"

"Sue, I don't know what to tell you. I checked a thousand times. Unfortunately this means we have to strip Ms. Pierce of her title as president, she can no longer participate in any school activities this includes glee club, cheerios, the academic team, etc."

"You can't do this!" Santana jumped up from the chair. "I have been with Brittany in almost all of her classes! She hands in the work and has gotten grades for it all! Obviously someone is messing with your system! You can take away all those things from her! She's about to graduate!"

"Please, Ms. Lopez." Figgins leaned back in his chair suddenly aware of the objects on his desk which the small spirited girl could use as a weapon. There had been many times he had broken Santana out of fights with other students. It wouldn't be a lie to say that the girl scared him a bit. "Sit down and calm yourself. I also agree that this situation seem preposterous and completely unlikely and yet we have no record of Brittany's tests or grades. I even sent our student work down into the archives to look for a physical paper trail, but the girl said Brittany S. Pierce didn't even have a hard file."

"This is ludicrious!" Sue bellowed.

"I love Luda!" Brittany interjected.

"Britt, love…" Santana sat back down and looked at Brittany. "They are saying we can't graduate together."

"But why? I did all my homework and went to class and I passed all the grades before senior year. Obviously there's a mistake somewhere. Why wouldn't they let us graduate together?"

"I don't know. Obviously someone has to fix this." Santana glared back at Figgins making the principal once again very aware of how unstable teenagers are.

"I can't! My hands are tied! There is nothing that says Brittany has even been enrolled in McKinley!"

"Figgins, this cannot stand! We have been teaching and coaching Brittany for the past four years. Paperwork has to exist to prove it!" Sue said suddenly understanding the implication. "She's been my best dancer and competing for four years! I monitor all my athletes very closely to make sure they all have passing grades so we can keep competing."

"Sue, if you have some record of her grades that we are not aware of, then I suggest you find them immediately so we can sort this out! Until then, I must suspend Brittany since it is far too late in the semester to have her finish freshman year. Next year she can enroll or perhaps get a GED during the night courses we offer. There is nothing else I can do."

"But, I have to get ready for prom, graduation, and going to New York with Santana so I can open up my dance studio and my detective agency!"

"I am sorry, Brittany, I truly am, but you are going to have to wait to do all of that. Someone else will take over those duties. And because you are no longer a student at McKinley, I have to have security escort you from the premises. Please forgive me."

"San?" Brittany looked at Santana.

"You can't! I have sat with her in every class and we've done all of our assignments together! If she's not in the system then I shouldn't be!" Santana got up and shut the door to the office and locked it so security couldn't come in.

"I know you are upset, but that arguing won't change anything."

Sue calmly walked over to Santana and pulled her arm gently leading her away from the door. "May I have a few moments alone with the girls before you let security in here?" She directed her question to Figgins. The principal sighed, but stood up from his chair.

"You only have a few minutes please make it quick. I could get into serious trouble."

"Thank you." Sue said sweetly. In fact so sweet it made Brittany's face cringe in confusion.

Once the door was closed, Santana yanked her arm from Sue's grasp. "You have to fix this coach! This can't be true! None of it! It's ridiculous! You always fix these things! Just do it again and we can all go back to class!"

Sue shook her head. "I don't know if I can bully Figgins this time. It seems like his source came from the outside maybe higher up therefore other people besides us know about Brittany's missing records."

"Then I can't graduate?" Brittany asked. Her voice dropped in defeat and her head hung. Santana's heart broke at the sight.

"No. You are graduating and we are going to prom and she is participating in glee and cheerios!" Santana pleaded, but the look on Sue's face made even her chest fall. Not so confident now, she asked. "Right?"

"Girls, I will look through my office, but most of my grade tracking was done through the school's system. I don't think I will find anything. I will even have Becky go down into the archives to search, but if the student worker didn't find anything then I doubt that she will."

"So I am going to be a freshman again?"

"Not necessarily. You two have been working together all year on cases like this one and found things thought lost forever. You've even been helping the peons who also go to school here. I am sure one of them can help you out. Either you have to find the anonymous source or you have to find the missing records. Nothing completely vanishes." Sue spoke sincerely. "Find it fast because I am not sure how much time you'll have if they will let you graduate on time even if you do find the records. You can't miss too much school."

"So this is going to be our last case at McKinley High?" Brittany asked looking for Santana's support.

"Looks like it. Shit. I just can't believe how crazy this all is. It makes no sense." Santana returned Brittany's gaze.

The door to the office opened and two men stepped inside. They definitely were not Frank. Since the missing trophy case and Figgins step up in security, they had these real tough big guys patrolling the school. They gestured for Brittany to get up from the chair.

"Come on we have to take you out. Your sister has already been called and she's here waiting to drive you home."

"You called Allie? She's gonna be so upset!" Brittany's eyes slid from the tough guys to Santana.

"She'll understand, B. Just go home and I will get out of here as quickly as I can and drive to your house so we can plan what to do next." Santana tried to stay calm, but it was hard when two men were practically dragging her lover out of the office.

"Hurry, San! I don't want to be a freshman again!" Brittany said over her shoulder as the two guards walked her down the hallway.

Santana pushed away a stray tear from the corner of her eye. There was no way Brittany wasn't graduating.

"Lopez." Sue said nicely and touched her shoulder with sincere compassion. "If anyone can figure out this whole mess it's you, Brittany, and that fat cat she keeps around. Keep yourself level headed and think about who could have done this and why. You have to treat it like a case that doesn't involve Brittany. Treat it like any other case."

"But coach I can't even think straight right now."

"I know, but you have to try…do it for Brittany."

"Where do I start?"

"My Nazi hunting parents always said to start at the source." Sue said with a nod. "And then cut the head off of it."

With that, the cheerios coach walked away leaving Santana in the middle of the hall. At the source? What source? There was literally nothing! Santana felt her frustration mounting like she would scream, but her phone vibrated.

She looked down. It was from Brittany.

_S, find out who erased my records!_

_how?_

_Isn't there anyone you know who is good with computers?_

'_sides u?_

_There has to be someone._

_ill find someone. r you okay? did Allie flip?_

_No, but she said she's gonna shit on some apes or something tomorrow in Figgins office._

_good she better go ape shit_

_I love you._

_i love you 2. C u soon_

Santana shut her phone and took a deep breath. She could do this. Brittany believed in her and everything was going to be okay. For a few minutes she ran through a list of names before coming to the one she knew would be perfect for hacking into the school system. Without delay she started to walk through the halls of McKinley. Hopefully this wouldn't backfire in her face. It wasn't like they had had a very good relationship for the past four years. In fact, they had never had a good relationship or moment ever.

But fuck it. Santana wasn't about to take no for answer. She would get help willingly or by force.

It seemed as if Lord Tubbington's Private Eye would have one more case before the end of the school year. It was without a doubt, their most important case yet.

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><p><strong>Oh no! Brittany's not graduating! Hopefully LT: P-EYE can solve the case before it's too late for the girls to dance together at prom and walk away from Lima with their diplomas! <strong>

**Are you guys excited? I definitely am! :D Reviews, comments, and messages are always appreciated! Thanks and have a lovely week and weekend! **


	15. Sloping Gradient

**Thanks again for all the adds and reviews! They definitely make my day!**

**Side note: I did start working on my new story taking place years and years from now. So I am very excited about that as well. :D Sorry, I had to share! hahaha**

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><p><strong>XV. Sloping Gradient<strong>

Santana marched down the hallway towards the tech room where she knew quite a few losers would be hanging out. They always got pulled out of class for some emergency or something like that so they constantly had these out of class free cards they flashed at the drop of a hat. Her shoes pounded on the tile floors as she made her way. Already she was thinking of the best ways to kill all the administrative staff at McKinley. How dare they lose Brittany's records and then act as if their only option was to drop kick Britt back to 9th grade. It was insane.

But that was McKinley, always doing something ass backwards and pretending like it was the right thing. Normally Sue would fix it by growling, but she had to take a back seat recently since she had competition herself with that new coach hanging around and making life difficult.

Whatever.

Lord Tubbington et al would take care of the situation.

She knocked loudly on the door and the voices inside instantly silenced themselves. Santana knocked again this time a little louder.

"I know you geeks are in there so unless you want me to go all crazy on your door till all that's left to hide you, your acne, and your pathetic excuses for what counts in your world as a social left exposed for the rest of the school to see because all you'll have left to separate your lives from the lives of normal teenagers are hinges then please continue to ignore me." Santana didn't care if she was being perhaps a bit confrontational. She had no time for this bullshit. She knocked again.

Again no answer except a few giggles from beyond the door.

"That's it. I am getting a chainsaw and a butter knife. One of them I will use for the door and the other one I will use on whatever you have between your legs!" The fiery girl made to turn away, but she smirked as she heard the door creak behind her.

Santana Lopez whipped back around to face none other than Jacob.

"Fro-boy, so nice to see that you don't want me to cut you a thousand ways before I finally let you die."

Despite the clearly scared look in his face behind his thick glasses, Jacob gulped before saying exactly as he thought. "I wouldn't mind if you cut me as long as you did it naked. I heard on good authority that you have slept with half the school and the other half you let them jiggle your womanly globes including the female population now that you've admitted to batting for the other team."

Jacob cringed after completing his statement and for good reason. Santana looked like a woman ready to attack. She lunged forward poking at him with her finger in the chest hard.

"Is that what you've heard? Well I have it on good authority that you were caught in the girls' locker room and had a stiffy so bad that you had to be sent home just so you could take care of it. How embarrassing." Jacob flushed, but Santana continued with her attack.

"Second, I heard that you tried to get it on with one, Rachel Berry. And despite the horrendous and terribly inaccurate rumor that the troll and I are friends now, I only have that picture of her in my locker as a sign of good will to show the school board that I have snixx under control-"

"What picture? Who is snixx?" Jacob asked confused, but Santana jabbed her finger into his chest harder.

"Whatever! Pay attention afores I endz you, Jacob. I am not friends with her and third, you tried to get it on with her before you tried to get it on with me. There is one thing I am not and that is Rachel Berry's sloppy seconds. Therefore you will never get even a glimpse of these rambunctious twins practically popping from my cheerleading uniform due to a very generous and wonderful surgery I had to make them even better and more appealing than any girl's twins in the school." Santana finally took a breath from her rant to wait for Jacob's response.

The boy gulped, but didn't move. Getting verbally abused by the Santana Lopez was always something of an ordeal. Not one that someone could easily recover from. Finally he swallowed some air and braved the unknown by speaking. "Is is okay that I am completely turned on by everything you just said. Knowing that I can't touch them makes them even sexier when I think about them later before I go to sleep."

"Ugh!" Santana pushed him into the room. Once they cleared the door, she turned around and shut it. A few boys were hanging around a table with all sorts of techno stuff and gadgets or whatever nerd boys played with. By their expressions, Santana could tell they too were confused and excited that Santana Lopez had decided to come into their domain. It was a good day to be a nerd. "That was disgusting. I need to wash my hands immediately after I am done in here. I cannot believe you just said that out loud and told me!"

"I can't help it. You're like number one on my fantasy spank bank…well would be spank bank. Don't worry Rachel Berry is like number six after you, your hot smoking girlfriend who dances in those leather outfits through the school talking about girl power is number two, then of course Quinn Fabray because she's dreamy, fourth is that other blonde cheerleader, and fifth is Noah Puckerman-"

Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at him strangely, but Jacob shrugged before continuing. "-what can I say? Puck has the most amazing arms. I have seen them close up many times as he has thrown me into the dumpster."

The rest of the boys all looked around at each other before making some sort of assenting remark about how they too had noticed Puckerman's guns at one point or another. Santana's face continued to grow more and more sideways. If that was a term for what she was feeling. She couldn't even begin to imagine what they were talking about and the fact that Jacob was now going through his fantasy whack list in front of her was just unbelievable.

Brittany S. Pierce was damn lucky she was so hot and adorable that Santana would put up with anything for her blonde girlfriend. Or perhaps it was Santana who was the lucky one. Either way…this was beyond weird and awkward.

Jacob wasn't finished yet. "And _then_ comes Rachel Berry at number six. See you two aren't even in the same category. You're number one at the top while she is at six behind Puckerman and followed closely by Mike Chang's abs. And yes I mean his abs. If you want I can keep going because I have the entire school mapped out on a chart."

"Stop! Please! Stop." Santana said rushing forward to place her hand over his mouth. If she had to hear one more person on that list, the Latina was sure she was going to puke. She whipped her hand back from his face. "Oh my God! You did _not _just lick my hand! You pervert! I will kill you!"

Jacob laughed before seeing the look on Santana's face. He yelped and jumped behind a few of his friends on the other side of the table. "You said I couldn't touch your boobies so I figured getting to taste a hand that's been on at least most of my top ten would almost be like getting with all of them."

"That logic is so ridiculous and wrong that I can't even think of a way to insult you! How did you get like this? Too much time sticking that tongue into electrical outlets? That would explain both your insanity and your hair!"

Jacob shook his head and ignored the comment. Now that he realized he was surrounded by his friends, he felt instantly able to stand up to brunette. He puffed his stature up before addressing Santana once again. "What are you doing here, oh Queen of the Lesbians and all things that hurt?"

Perhaps at another time in her life in high school, like the middle of the past year, she would have been hurt by the use of her sexuality as a means to tear her down. But the past half year she had enjoyed an open and loving relationship with the girl she loved and who loved her back unconditionally. Who cared if everyone knew that she batted for the other team now?

"Call me whatever you want as long as you put that queen in front of it, I won't have to end you." Santana replied with a smirk before crossing her arms over her chest making sure that her breasts popped just enough to regain control over the conversation. Jacob and the rest of the boys did not miss the signal. They instantly fell back in line by staring at her tits. "Now I have a request."

"Anything for you, Santana, as long as you don't move." Jacob replied still distracted.

"Good answer. Now I know you aren't really listening to me at the moment, but I require your full and undivided attention for the task at hand."

"What hand touches your breasts the most?" One of the other boys asked without really hearing anything Santana had said.

The Latina sighed with exasperation she grabbed a coat from one of the chairs and covered herself with it. That got the boys' attention. "Are you ready to listen? I will not be showing anything if you can't pay attention for more than two words."

"Fine, continue. We will listen to your demands oh, Satan with the tits."

"That's Queen Satan with the tits to you." Santana glared at Jacob. "I need your help because someone must have gone through the school's system in the past day and erased all records of Brittany attending McKinley High School. Now Figgins is threatening to not let her graduate, go to prom, or compete on either the cheerleading squad or even glee club. And in case you don't know who Brittany is, she would be number two on your list, Jacob. So if you want to keep imagining her dancing around me naked in your little fantasy dreams, you had better figure out a way to find out who erased her files. Or you won't have a thing between your legs to fantasize with. You understand me?"

Jacob gulped once again remembering who he was dealing with. This was no ordinary cheerio. This was _the _Santana Lopez, the same girl who held the record for most fights in the school outside of any commissioned and sanctioned arena. Lopez could and would throw down with anyone if it meant getting her way.

"So you want us to hack into the school system and try to locate who erased all Brittany's files?"

"Was I not clear enough?"

"And what's in it for me?"

Santana glared at him, but Jacob held his ground.

"Are you kidding me?"

"Nope, dead serious."

"I won't kill you."

"Not good enough. I want something much more…physical."

Santana growled, but couldn't think of another way out of letting Jacob get what he wanted. If she wanted to help Brittany, she needed someone with his expertise to help hack into the school's systems. Just as she was about to agree, another voice came from the back room.

"You're not going to want to deal with Jacob just yet, Lopez, because he's all wrong for the job. You need the best and in order to get the best, you're going to have to deal with a bigger, bitch-ier devil than ever yourself."

Santana froze in place. Did she recognize the voice? Oh fuck yeah, she did. She turned towards the direction of the voice and met with the condescending gaze of Lauren Zizes.

"_Lauren_." Santana said in a voice none too pleased to be talking to the girl. No matter how many times they had spent in Pillsbury's office going over the reasons why they shouldn't be fighting and how they could still be friends and not like each other (which made no sense) had done nothing to improve their relationship.

Yet sometime during the year, Lauren had dropped off the face of the earth and Santana had only seen her in passing. A few times Rachel would ask Puck if he knew what Lauren was up to and if she would be rejoining the New Directions anytime soon, but Puck had no answer. Mostly the rumors said that she had quit all her activities in order to train her body for earning a wrestling scholarship.

"_Lopez_."Lauren said in the same voice dripping with venom. The boys around the room realized that a fight could break out at any moment and cleared space for the two girls to square off.

"So you say that making a deal with him would be a bad idea. From what I can see and that is after I crane my neck to look around you, I don't see anyone else offering to hack into the school computers to find the answer to my problem."

Lauren didn't bite at Santana's vicious attack on her weight. In fact, the two girls secretly enjoyed the verbal abuse they could dish out to each other. "I see that you still haven't stopped indulging yourself on that extra fatty diet of bitch-chex that you eat every morning because you are still as pleasant as ever."

"What can I say? I loves me as mean, bitchy, and with a side of ass-kicking."

"Still all bark and no bite, huh? I heard you've been tamed anyway by that blonde who you were always chasing around at glee club."

"Oh you wanna bring Britts into this?" Santana took a step forward.

Lauren replied in turn by advancing as well. "I don't want to bring your girl in here. What I want is to settle something once and for all."

"Oh and what could there possibly be to settle between us?"

"A matter of dispute which you started with your rumors when you told everyone that you had kicked my ass in that little fight we had over Puck."

"Oh please, Zizes, you can have Puck besides he would only be my sloppy seconds."

"I don't want Puck. I have moved on. He was hardly man enough for me. What I want is to fight you on the mat and prove that I am superior once in for all."

Santana narrowed her eyes. Sure she had spread those rumors after Lauren had thrown her from one side of the hallway to the other. She had a reputation to protect. Reputation was more important than anything and having to fight Lauren over Puck had been humiliating enough. Fighting Lauren again? That would be suicide. She frowned.

There was no other option.

Either she fought Lauren or she had to let Jacob grope her. As much as she hated the thought of Lauren kicking her ass a second time, she couldn't stand the thought of letting Jacob put one of his greasy palms on her tits. Gross.

This was for Brittany.

"Fine." Santana finally said. "But you have to guarantee that you can trace the source of the Brittany's disappearance."

"Not a problem. In fact, I have been tracking and looking into the system crash since it went down last night. So I am probably a few hours away from completing the task. That gives you just enough time to finish school and go home to get dressed for the biggest smack down of your life, Lopez."

Santana teeth were grinding against each other, but she couldn't respond now. She needed Lauren in order to get Brittany back into McKinley before Figgins kicked her back to ninth grade.

"Fine. Where and when? It has to be today. We need the information asap."

"You'll have it as long as you show up at the gym at 4pm ready. After our match, I will give you all the knowledge I have found out by then." Lauren finished while sucking on a lollipop in her mouth. Santana grumbled but nodded in agreement. It seemed as if the bigger girl wasn't done. She continued. "Oh and Lopez, I will be videotaping the whole thing just so we can make sure the student body gets an accurate account of the incident this time."

Anger boiling just beneath the surface, Santana held it all back and kept reminding herself that this was for Brittany. They needed Lauren. Bitch would be lucky if Santana didn't cut her before then.

"Super! Fan-fucking-tastic. Can't wait for the whole school to see you humiliate yourself on tape." She spoke through gritted teeth before walking away.

She was doing this for Brittany.

She was doing this for Brittany.

Santana kept saying it over and over again. Yet the feeling that she was about to publically get her ass kicked kept surfacing. Flicking open her phone, she texted Brittany the details of the exchange before stepping into her next class. Her eyes kept glancing to the wall on the clock knowing that when school let out, she would probably be crushed to death.

* * *

><p>After the final bell, Santana had taken her time to get to her car. Needless to say, she was slightly worried about her impending doom. At least she wouldn't have to worry about Brittany. Maybe they would let her girlfriend finish her senior year out of pity since Santana would be dead. At least that plan would be her last resort.<p>

Thinking of Brittany, the blonde had sent Santana a text saying that she would be at the gym in time for Santana's big wrestling debut and that she couldn't wait to see her girlfriend all greased up and ready to defend the honor of her household against Lauren. Santana was pretty sure that Brittany had either been watching too much 300 or perhaps Spartacus, either way, Brittany didn't seem to understand that Lauren would not only win, but in all likelihood kill the Latina.

And Britt's message was: Can't wait for you to win! See you at school!

Even if Brittany wasn't technically a student anymore, apparently she was able to enter the school for sport activities. When she explained to the security guards, the same ones who had dragged her out of the school earlier that day, that she was there for the wrestling match, both men knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Oh you're talking about the big show down?"

"Are there any other events?" Brittany asked the biggest of the two men.

"Of course! We've got soccer playing and a few other teams, but everyone's been talking about the wrestling matching between the big girl and the lesbian."

Brittany frowned. She didn't like it when people marginalized Santana based on her sexuality. Her girlfriend had a lot more qualities besides who she was dating.

"So this is a school event now?"

"Well now it is and that's the only reason we can let you into the building since you'll be a paying spectator. Once the principal caught wind about this showdown of showdowns, he decided that he could raise a few extra bucks and open it to the public. I heard there are even a few bets and pools going on. So you might want to get in there quickly before they close off the betting. Besides I'm sure we have to bust them up soon. Well that was until Fred here decided to put his money on the small one."

"She looked like she could kick some serious ass when we saw her in the principal's office this morning." Fred said.

Brittany looked at them like they were crazy. She shifted her backpack gingerly hoping that the two guards wouldn't decide to look through it. Maybe she had learned her lesson earlier in the year when Lord Tubbington had flown from her bag and attacked Santana. Brittany had learned that she should let others open her bag. Also to let Lord Tubbington divulge himself and smoke a little bit before travel. The feline had instantly relaxed and it seemed like he wouldn't be leaping from her backpack anytime soon.

The guards never asked to check her bag though. They were too concerned with their bets on the match. Santana hadn't been kidding about this whole wrestling thing. Britt felt guilty that she hadn't arrived early enough to drive with Santana and give her a good luck kiss before the big match. But she had wanted to make Santana some encouraging posters to look at while she was fighting Lauren.

"Ah, Miss Pierce, so happy to see you still supporting your school since you will be attending McKinley High for another four years!" Figgins voice greeted her at the door. She sighed. No way did Brittany want to be a freshman again. She handed Figgins five dollars to pay for entrance to the gym.

"Sorry, Principal Figgins, but there is no way that's going to happen. Santana, Lord Tubbington, and I are already on the case. So you'll be handing me my diploma in a matter of weeks."

"I love that spirit! That's the kind of spirit I wish all of our incoming freshman would have especially when faced with insurmountable odds! Don't worry I will be rooting for you!" Figgins raised both his fists as a way to encourage Brittany without actually knowing what she had said. The blonde breezed past him not wanting to spend anymore time on Figgins. Her girl would be competing for not only her love, but also for information regarding Britt's disappearance.

Quinn, Puck, Mercedes, and Rachel all sat in the front row waving to Brittany since they had saved her a seat. For a moment, Brittany couldn't believe how packed the gym was since it seemed to be put together at the last moment.

"Hey guys!" Britt plopped down on the seat inbetween Puck and Quinn. "It's crazy in here. Did everyone show up for this?"

"Are you kidding? This is gonna be the greatest thing since the last time they fought or even when you and Santana fought. That was pretty hot too." Puck leaned over and gave Quinn a small punch on the arm with a wink.

Quinn smiled rolling her eyes. "You would like that."

"Damn straight I did. I watch it on youtube sometimes when I'm bored."

This time all the girls rolled their eyes except for Brittany. She looked at Puck and returned his cocky smirk with a high five. "Totes. I know exactly what you mean. That was hot."

Puck nodded his head. "Yeah, Britt knows exactly what I am talking about. A little cheerio on cheerio action."

This time instead of rolling her eyes, Quinn blushed a little while Brittany kept her soft smile to herself thinking about that one night at Santana's house when there had been some cheerio on cheerio on former cheerio action. That had been very hot.

"Well I for one don't understand why I had to pay five dollars to see this display of exhibitionism since we can see Santana fight just about every day in glee club if someone doesn't actively hold her back or distract her with…" Rachel glanced to Brittany's hands obviously thinking of the many times they had disappeared under the cheerleading uniforms.

"With what?" Brittany asked sweetly.

"Nevermind. I just don't see the necessity of our presence perpetuating Santana's already overly aggressive nature. We send the wrong message when she sees us in the crowd and only invite more dissention from her in the future. When she comes at one of us with one of those knives she's always talking about, we will only have ourselves to blame."

Mercedes started to laugh. "Oh please, Rachel, you're worried because the only person she would come after would be you since she's threatened you so many times. Besides you don't have to worry about S when she's got Britt here to keep an eye out for her. That's how Troubletones roll, honey."

Brittany and Mercedes exchanged a complicated set of handshakes that Puck tried to get in on. Instead he received a swift slap to the back of his head from Mercedes and a disapproving head shake.

After a few minutes, Brittany suddenly remembered that she had brought LT to watch the fight. The blonde reached into her back and pulled out both LT and the signs she had made that said Santana's name across them in big colorful letters. Lord T sat contentedly on the bench beside Brittany so the blonde felt confident the cat wouldn't go wandering off to eat the mascot this time like LT had tried in Figgins' office.

Suddenly the crowd started to roar and clap.

Brittany looked up in time to see Lauren exiting from the locker room dressed in her wrestling outfit.

Puck sighed next to her. "Damn, I should have never let her get away. I had to watch so much more porn just to keep up with her. I knew it wouldn't be enough."

Brittany gave him a bro pat on the back at his loss, but her eyes were already looking for her girl to come out next. A few seconds behind Lauren, Santana walked out wearing yoga pants and a tight tank with one of those wrestling helmets. The yoga pants made her ass look really good, but compared to Lauren she looked like a twig. Maybe Santana had been right to worry.

Santana for the most part kept her head held high even as her eyes dashed around the gym in disbelief. Brittany knew exactly why her girlfriend was looking around. First, because she hadn't expected anyone except Brittany to be here. But more importantly, Brittany knew Santana wanted to see her. The blonde jumped up from her seat and raised her sign with Santana's name and screamed. Santana instantly heard the voice and glanced around for the source. They made eye contact and Brittany could see San instantly compose herself.

Britt looked down to see if LT had also been cheering on Santana, but instead found mutiny in the ranks.

Lord Tubbington also had a poster that read: GO OTHER GIRL NOT SANTANA!

"LT!" Brittany snatched the poster from him and stuffed it back in her bag. "I can't believe you brought that when I expressly forbid you from taking it with us! Here take this one!"

She handed him another sign that she had made. The cat accepted reluctantly.

"You think Santana's gonna die?" Puck asked.

"No, of course not! She's gonna rock this." Brittany said quickly.

"I have money riding that she bites after a minute."

"She won't." Brittany muttered under her breath. Her attention committed fully to the middle of the gym.

Jacob walked out wearing a purple suit and a bowtie. Brittany wondered if he had borrowed the outfit from Blaine, that man did love his bowties.

"Ladies, gentlemen, faculty, and Principal Figgins and more importantly Coach Sue Sylvester." He greeted everyone making sure to look for Sue's approval. The cheerios coach waved her hand dismissively at him and then appeared to shrug innocently at Figgins. "We have here today for your viewing pleasure a match that many of us have been waiting to see once again. On my left the impressive leading wrestler currently holding all of McKinley's men's wrestling records the great, the powerful Lauren Zizes!"

The crowd roared.

"And on my right we have the beautiful fiery singer and co-captain of the two time national cheerleading squad complete with razors in her hair and a tongue that can cut diamonds – the fierce and temperamental Santana Lopez!"

The crowd reciprocated the same amount of noise, but this time with a very enthusiastic Brittany S. Pierce jumping up and down in the front row.

"Ladies, please come together and shake hands." Jacob ushered them forward. The two girls stuck out their hands but neither touched the other. "And begin!"

Somewhere a bell rung and the crowd once again went crazy. This was better than a normal assembly besides Santana Lopez fighting had become legendary at the school.

Lauren stepped up right away and threw her whole body at Santana, but Britt's girlfriend nimbly jumped to the side and tried to do the same to the much larger girl. Unfortunately Santana just bounced off her. Lauren smiled as she turned into Santana and lifted the girl up and threw her down to the mat. The crowd made a collective noise of approval and the same face as they cringed. Brittany's hand shot out to Quinn's leg and squeezed the girl's thigh hard.

"It's okay, Britt. Santana will be fine."

Brittany didn't hear the words of comfort as the two girls continued to roll on the mat. Well one girl continued to roll while the other one continued to stomp down trying to pin the small brunette down. This continued for a few more minutes till a bell was wrung and Jacob stepped up to separate the two. He said a few words to Lauren who looked over at Santana and nodded.

"Lauren has given Santana the option to drop out if she wants."

Brittany squeezed Quinn's thigh harder. "Do you think she's hurt?"

"How about it, Santana?"

The brunette looked at the crowd felt the energy of them waiting for her to admit defeat. She did just get pretty wrecked, but instead she found Brittany's eyes and shook her head no.

"Lez go." Santana stepped back onto the mat right as the bell sounded again.

Lauren wasted no time as she threw Santana from one side of the mat to the other. Yet Santana didn't give up. At one point it looked like she was wiping blood from the side of her mouth, but she just kept getting right back up. After five rounds, the crowd was still cheering and once again Jacob offered Santana a way out, but she found Britt's eyes.

If it was the last thing, she was going to see Brittany graduate.

"Are you ready to call it a quits yet, Santana?" Jacob taunted from the middle of the ring. Santana flipped him the birdie. The school laughed. Even Figgins clapped at the entertainment.

Lauren stepped forward before Santana could walk back onto the mat.

"Lopez." Lauren offered her hand out. Santana was reluctant, but finally accepted the girl's hand. "Despite the fact that I have thrashed you now for the better part of an hour, I completely respect your decision to continue this fight. But I am going to cut it short. You've been an honorable opponent."

The crowd gasped. Brittany finally released some of the pressure on Quinn's leg.

"So you're going to help us?"

"Of course. I have everything you want to know waiting back up in the tech room." Lauren nodded still chomping on her gum. "We'll call it even?"

"Deal." Santana shook her hand. This time the crowd began to clap. Well most of them started to clap, a few shook their heads angrily at losing their bets. Everyone started the head for the doors. Brittany was the first to reach Santana.

"San!" Brittany hugged her girlfriend tight around the waist. Santana groaned feeling every bruise from Lauren's beating.

"Baby! Babe. Please, gently."

"Oh sorry, San. I'm just so happy you're still alive. Puck kept saying that you were going to die." Brittany pushed back a strand of dark hair from Santana's face.

"I'll take care of him later." Santana said with a glare, but her face softened at Brittany's touch. She couldn't help herself as she leaned over for a kiss. "Thanks for being here."

"Of course." Britt said with a smile.

Lauren rolled her eyes. "Nice to see you're still whipped as ever, Lopez. Come on before I puke."

* * *

><p>"You see I had been trying to follow the source of the system shut down since I realized what happened last night." They were gathered around Lauren's computer back in the tech room. "It wasn't easy, but I did manage to find a trail leading to a server off school so it was definitely an outside job."<p>

"What does any of that mean? Other spies?" Brittany asked. Santana said nothing since she had no idea what Zizes was talking about.

"What it means my little blonde cupcake is that I know the source of the hack, but not the hacker herself."

"Herself? Another girl?" Santana shot.

"Well I assume it's another girl since it came from Crawford County Day."

"Wait. Isn't that where all those girls go to school?" Brittany asked.

"Yeah isn't that where girls are pent up and left to fool around with each other because there are no boys around. And they have to wear skirts and uniforms all the time?" Santana also asked.

"I can't answer about the experimenting part. That seems more up your alley, but they definitely have to wear uniforms and no boys." Lauren said. "So hopefully this helps you out. I have no idea what type of enemies you have, but it has to be someone at Crawford. Good luck finding out who it is. I will keep digging on my end, but I doubt I will find much else."

"Thanks, Lauren!" Brittany hugged Lauren as she got up.

Santana was slower to rise, but she still held out her hand. "Yeah, thanks, Lauren, and about all that stuff I said to you."

"Don't worry about it, Lopez. I wouldn't want to change our relationship anyway."

They shook hands. The two cheerios made to leave when Lauren called back. "By the way, I am _still _posting that video on youtube!"

"Whatever."

* * *

><p><strong>Whaaaa? Warblers sister school has something to do with the case? Now this shit's just cray! Hopefully the girls will figure out a way to find and restore all Britt's records before the end of graduation. Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Have a great rest of the week and a very merry glee day! :D<strong>


	16. RetroGrade Motion

**Wow! Sorry for the really long break! I promise I didn't forget about my story and to update. Unfortunately classes and the semester are incredibly demanding. I had multiple papers, presentation, work, and etc. You know how that gets, but I am back and working my way into the last part of LT: P-EYE and I still have my new story on the side burner that I will be posting as soon as I finish this last case. Trust me. It's gonna be intense and fun. I am really excited to share. I have to stop myself before I start gushing. As a teaser I can tell you the title is _Sirens. _**

**Oh! And thank you thank you thank you for all the encouraging reviews from my regular commentators and new names! It was so nice to hear some really awesome things about my story.**

* * *

><p><strong>XVI. RetroGrade Motion<strong>

"This is never going to work!"

"Sure it will, but you need to keep your head clear of negative thoughts, Santana. Remember when we thought that I would never be able to fly and then I thought of something that made me happy and then boom! I could fly! I could fly! I could fly!"

"You've been falling asleep with the television on again. Haven't you?" Santana's voice.

"Why?"

"Because that's a scene from Peter Pan."

"No thanks, San. I don't think I should have a peanut butter and jelly right now. I mean what if I get some jelly on my scarves? I mean that would be such a mess and I don't think the costume shop would appreciate cleaning them. Besides we already got glitter everywhere and I don't think that was part of the original plan."

Santana groaned. "That's because there was no original plan! This is crazy and I don't know why I let Tim talk me into it! Normally that boy is on point, but he is straight up cray this time."

"Aww don't talk about Tim like that. His idea was fantastical!"

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here!" A young male voice suddenly chimed into the conversation.

"I think you've said more than enough for one day, Tim."

"Don't be mean to Tim, San!"

"Hey! I thought we were buddies now!"

"Yea and I thought that I had a better partner-in-crime, but now I see you're like the bigger version of Lord Tubbers."

"You're comparing me to a cat?"

"Lord Tubbington can hear you, Santana Lopez, and he does not appreciate your tone of voice."

"Of course he can hear me, B. You've been holding him in the car singing only the top 40 feline hits and refused to let me put on any other music. Unfortunately the top 40 list of cat songs really only contains 5 songs. So we've been listening to you and LT meow for the past thirty minutes with no reprieve." Santana's voice was now gaining volume. She felt tense enough about Brittany's impending failure from high school. Normally their cases were intense and for the most part they did have personal stakes, but none that involved her girlfriend.

Santana continued. "I mean how many times can you sing the _Siamese Cat Song_ from Lady and the Tramp followed immediately by _Cat People_. I mean, lez be real, I don't think anyone knows what Bowie is talking about. Well actually I take that back because after the fourth time you and Tubbs were cat walling the lyrics to the song I did want to set the car on fire and then dose it with gasoline! Besides, LT is totally off key."

Tim piped up again. "Oh don't forget they forgot the lyrics to Harry Chapin's _Cat's in the Cradle_ and they just kept singing the refrain. You know the part about the silver spoon and then they would start that all over again."

Brittany frowned and looked down at the cat sitting in her lap. "Don't listen to them LT. They are just jealous of our superior harmonies. We're a regular old Simone and Garfinkel!"

"Simon and Garfunkel, love, Simon and Garfunkel! And who the hell is Harry Chapin and why would you know who sings that song, Tim?"

"It's a total classic, Santana. I'm surprised you don't. I mean everyone knows that song."

"Of course I know it." Santana began, but was quickly cut off.

"Cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon. Little boy blue and the man on the moon. When ya coming home dad? I don't know when. We'll get together then, son. You know we'll have a good time then." Brittany and the cat were singing again. Well, Brittany was singing and Lord Tubbington was making some unearthly sound. Santana and Tim were both convinced the noise couldn't be natural. Brittany didn't notice the looks of horror on her companions' faces as she (as she had done the past four times they had sung the song) began at the refrain again. "Cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon. Little boy blue and the man on the moon. When ya coming home dad? I don't know when. We'll get together then, son. You know we'll have a good time then."

"Oh my God! Please for the love of all cats and furry things and whatever strikes your fancy at the moment. Please just not this song again!"

"Brittany, you know I love a rousing session of Cat Calls and Catchy Crunchy Tunes for the Top 40 Feline Playlist, but maybe we can just slow it down for a bit. I mean, we are almost there so maybe the radio would be best."

Brittany's eyes shifted from her hurt pussy to her girlfriend and then to their partner-in-solving-crime, Tim. They couldn't be serious. Obviously they had to be joking with her. No one ever got tired of her playlists. In fact, Brittany considered herself a master of the playlist making art. So it only made sense that they just needed a new song.

"She comes out of the sun in a silk dress. Running like a watercolor in the rain. Don't bother asking for explanations. She'll just tell you that she came. In the year of the cat." Brittany started singing the song _Year of the Cat_ by Al Stewart.

Santana reached over to the radio and blasted it through her car. The noise was so loud that it was hard to even make out what song was playing. Besides, Lord Tubbington had been startled by the sudden loud music and had jumped from Brittany's lap to launch himself into the back seat. Tim squealed from behind Santana and began trying to catch the cat. Despite Lord Tubbington's size, the feline proved to be deceptively fast when agitated.

"Britt! LT is loose!" Santana yelled and glanced from the road to Britt.

But the blonde didn't budge. In fact, she met Santana's glare with one of her own. "You shouldn't have said that LT was singing off key. I'm sure he didn't appreciate it."

Santana couldn't believe the snarky comments Brittany was giving her. "Fine, if you don't believe me then we can get an expert to make sure LT is singing in key."

"Oh yeah and who's that?"

"Please!" Tim's voice pleaded from the backseat of the car along with some hisses and other ominous noises. "Please someone get Lord Tubbington off me!"

Neither girl responded. They were too busy arguing over Lord Tubbington's singing ability or meowing ability. "We'll just ask Troll-face, Man-hands, Self-appointed Diva, Rachel Berry."

"Oh you would say that. Are you going to get her to sign that picture of her in your locker or maybe she can kiss it with some pink lipstick."

"We've already discussed this a thousand times."

"What does she even know about the range of cats? I don't think she's the resident cat aficionado. Did she win an academic competition with her knowledge of cat diseases? No? Because I did and that makes me an expert on cat voices and I say that Lord Tubbington has perfect pitch and always sings on key."

"You can't be serious!"

"I think your cat's trying to impregnate me!" Tim called still looking for help. He wasn't going to be very lucky today.

Both girls whipped around in the front seat of the car and said at the same time. "Quiet!"

Tim and Lord Tubbington froze. The cat had clawed its way up Tim's pant leg. From what the young boy could see, it looked like the cat had been trying to hump him. But that was only one side of the story. Unfortunately, LT couldn't defend himself from such an accusation. Luckily, Brittany was too distracted by the argument in the front of the car.

"If you think that being an expert on diseases and might I mention the only reason you know most of those are because LT is a notorious hound dog and has contracted most of those STDs himself." Santana bit back.

"Take that back! Hearsay! And never proven! And we take offense to being called a horn dog! Lord Tubbington just happens to be a perfectly respectable gentleman caller to most of the female cats in the neighborhood. He's beaten all the paternity tests and we never got the call back to the Jerry Springer show."

"A gentleman caller who visits _all_ the cats in the neighbor is anything but perfectly respectable! In fact, they have another name for that, he's a cat whor-"

A knock on the car window startled Santana from completing her sentence. Everyone in the car jumped about ten feet in the air. They hadn't been expecting anyone to even exist or be alive in the world outside of Santana's car.

The Latina turned to look out the window in order to access who could be addressing them and why. But in the same moment, she realized why she had stopped. Santana had successfully driven them to the gates of Crawford County School for Girls. Unfortunately, they had been so engrossed in their little…discussion, that none of them had realized why Santana had stopped the car. The car idled in front of the school's security station right outside of the gate. This place seemed ridiculous on the website, but in person, it was even worse.

Ivy grew all around the old brick building that looked like it had been commissioned when Queen Elizabeth was ordering Shakespeare to make her plays. It just had that feel of old-shity-building-no-one-could-bulldoze-because-of-historical-wealth-or-some-shit-like-that. Bushes and ivy lined the metal gate all the way around the grounds and it seemed like the only way to get in and out of Crawford Day was through this gate.

Santana immediately froze up as the gate keeper taped on her window again to indicate that she should roll it down. She blessed her father for once in her life for allowing her to get the tinted windows on her Mercedes. Maybe the security officer couldn't see inside. They passengers scrambled inside the car. Lord Tubbington was pried from Tim's pants and thrown into Brittany's lap in the front seat. Brittany adjusted the large amount of scarves that draped over her body. Santana looked between the front seats for her driver's hat. She popped it on her head and did a quick survey of the car to make sure everyone was properly dressed and prepped for their most ridiculous plan yet.

Tim laid on the backseat with his eyes closed as if he was suffering from a headache or perhaps meditating. Brittany had adjusted her makeup in the mirror. Her eyeliner had been drawn under her eyes dark and heavy curling out down to the top of her cheekbones. Purple eye-shadow had been generously applied along her eyelids. Her bright blonde hair was pinned to the top of her head so golden tendrils jetted in every direction. She looked absolutely ridiculous.

Santana was dressed in a black driver's suit as if she was a professional driver for a movie star. Britt thought she looked hot in the outfit and Santana could leave Crawford without drawing suspicion and get back to McKinley.

"Ready?" Santana asked. The car nodded.

She rolled down the window to the annoyed glare of the security guard. His suspicions were already raised because it had taken so long for them to roll the window down. Now he glanced from the driver to the passenger to the backseat and then back to Brittany to make sure he hadn't been seeing things. Nope, his eyes did not deceive him. She looked like a circus escapee.

"Can I ask what you are doing here madams?" The security guard looked at the boy in the back with a deeper frown, but Tim hadn't been kidding. He had a knack for acting. The kid didn't even flinch at the scrutinizing gaze. Instead he continued to lay back there in a dramatic frozen pose of both pain and distance apathy. Brittany also looked away from the older man and stared out the window as if she couldn't be bothered to answer his silly questions.

It was time for Santana to accomplish her only part in this mission.

"If you'd be so kind as to not lean on the Madame's car, it would be most appreciated and I won't have to report you." Santana spoke with curt frankness. The man instantly took a step back. "As for our arrival. I believe that you should have us on the list. In fact, I know that we are on the list since the Crawford County Day dean flew the Madame in personally to interview for the new teaching position."

Brittany sniffed in disgust next to Santana and made a show of huffing in indignation.

Santana leaned towards the security guard out the window to whisper. "And between us, I just want you to know that she is already annoyed and disappointed there isn't fanfare to greet her. The dean had mentioned that the school would be most pleased to receive her even for a guest lecture at the institution."

The security man bristled at the new information. He had already been in trouble with Dean Armanda a few times this month. Certainly he couldn't get any lower on her list then to piss off a potential new teacher. "Sure, sure and there's certainly no need to report anything to Dean Armanda. In fact, why don't you wait right there. Would you like any water or anything? I am sure you've had a long trip. No? Okay, well just wait for a moment while I go page to the Dean's office directly in order to see if she's expecting you and where you should be escorted."

"That would be very wise, Tony."

"It's Andy."

Santana cocked an eyebrow at him.

He blustered at the gesture and quickly wiped sweat from his forehead. "Tony's fine. I'll be right back."

"You do that."

The man walked back into his booth at a brisk pace while glancing behind his shoulder to make sure Brittany wasn't making any phone calls. Actually Brittany continued to look forward, but her mouth moved rapidly.

"San, don't worry this is going to work. Lauren set everything up and hacked their system to find out who would be visiting to fill out this position. Besides she sent the real Dr. Cindy Thomas an email to delay the meeting till next week. This is fool proof since she responded that it would be perfect! They will never know that we took her place until like next week."

"Sure, Britt, I know that Zizes took care of all that, but the part I am worried about is how you are supposed to be-"

"He's coming back!" Tim shouted from the backseat. He ducked back down and assumed his previous position. Both girls continued to stare ahead as if they hadn't been frantically discussing their disguise a moment ago.

"I'm so very sorry Dr. Thomas. I should have been expecting you on the roster. I didn't mean to cause an inconvenience. I look forward to listening to a lecture if you intend to open one up for the whole school. I know how the girls love guest lecturers. It gets them out of class."

Brittany waved her hand dismissively like she had seen Coach Sylvester do a thousand times before towards anyone she didn't particularly care for.

"Where are we going? You are making Dr. Thomas very agitated right now." Santana cut the man off before he could continue prattling. What kind of whack high school was this place? Thankfully her parents had never felt the need to love her enough to send her to a private institution. Like seriously? This place was cray.

"Oh right. Sorry. You can drive her right up front. Dean Armanda will be waiting to greet and take her on a small tour of the campus before Dr. Thomas gives a small lecture to a senior English class." He went to the side of the gate and pushed a few buttons. The lever which had been in front of Santana's car lifted to give them the space to drive through. Santana nodded and thanked the security guard before driving through.

"Thank god that's over. I thought for sure we were dead."

"Nah, we totally had it in the bag."

"I don't know I would work just a tiny bit on your form and delivery Santana. I don't think you were convincing enough as a driver. You sounded more like a personal slave or body guard. You glared at him so hard I thought you were going to knock his head off." Tim piped up from the backseat again. "If you want, I could give you some private acting lessons on the side. I mean I could give them to you for a fair price."

Santana glanced in the mirror pretending to glare at the boy, but she really did love Tim's humor. "Oh so you'd want me to pay you for acting lessons? You trying to run a side hustle on me, boy? On _the_ queen of hustling. Oh please, player, you need to find a new game."

Tim smirked as Santana threw him a playfully wink. Brittany smiled contentedly stroking LT in the front seat. "I think you should take up his offer, San. I mean you never know the next time we will have to go under cover like this. Besides, Tim has to be good. I mean what mother would let her son skip school to hang out with some high schoolers and break into another school all as an exercise in assuming roles or something. She had a fancier name for it than that, but I mean your mom is awesome, Tim!"

"Yeah she wanted me to practice so she thought it would be a great idea."

"Okay back on track. What are we doing?" Santana finally cut off the love fest. Sure she enjoyed Tim's mom, but she wasn't going to be here and helping them do all sorts of illegal shit in a few minutes.

"It's easy, Sanny. But you have to trust us. We are going to pretend to be this Dr. Thomas lady and see if we can somehow snoop around. Maybe we can even find some student files that would point us towards someone with the ability to make me disappear."

"Yeah, besides, I can sneak in and out of places if Brittany gets tied up."

"Fine, but I just wish there would have been someway for me to tag along."

"Sorry, babe, but we have to do it like this. Besides there would be too many of us and you have to be in school or Figgins will know you are skipping because of me and then you'll be in real trouble."

"Doesn't really matter, because I am sure we can weasel our way into spending the night. I can find a way to let you back in here. I'll take care of Britt. I mean Brittany and I were working cases long before we all started doing it together."

"You worked on cases for three weeks when I wasn't around. Three weeks isn't forever." Santana pulled the car up to the steps leading into Crawford County Day. "Fine. I get it. Just be careful and call me if you find anything out or if you need anything. You know I can be here in like ten minutes."

"It was a thirty minute drive." Tim said questioning the brunette.

Santana looked him dead in the eyes and repeated. "I will be here in ten minutes if you need me."

"Alright got it." Tim hopped out of the car and went around to open Brittany's door.

The blonde didn't get out right away instead she shifted her hand across the front seat and took hold of Santana's fingers. "I wish I could kiss you before you left."

"I know. Me too. Be careful, okay, B?"

"I will." Brittany took a step out, but turned around as she remembered something. "Oh, if you see Allie at McKinley make sure you say hi! I know how well you guys get along besides she mentioned something about having backup when she goes to talk to Figgins. Maybe you can be her backup."

Santana smiled. "Sure I'll look for her."

Tim once again had to add something. "Psssh you guys can team up like we are! I mean, clearly you won't have a better team since Britt, Lord T, and I form Team BLT."

"You form a sandwich?"

Both girls looked at him. So Tim explained. "Hello! B for Brittany. L for Lord Tubbington and T for me, Tim!"

"Get out of here!" Santana snarled playfully making waving him off with her hand. Brittany smirked at the exchanged and started to chant very silently. "BLT. BLT. BLT."

Tim joined her as they mounted the stairs. Santana waited for a moment shaking her head before she pulled away from the curb.

B and Tim walked up the stairs with authority. Well, Brittany and her cat mounted the stairs with authority, Tim, on the other hand, purposely looked morose and detached from everything as he followed her a half-step behind.

A plump older looking woman rushed down the stairs to greet them. "Oh! Dr. Thomas! I am so happy that you could make it to our small little school for a visit like this and then to express interest in working here as a teacher! My heart absolute jumped through my chest as I read the email."

"Twas nothing, m'dear! I was absolutely delighted-ful to hear that you were looking for a new instructor."

Tim had to work hard not to drop his jaw at the strange and exotic accent Brittany was using. It was both a British accent and one laced with deep intellectual snobbery on a level he had never quite mastered himself. Where had Brittany learned to talk like this?

But Dean Armanda didn't even bat an eye. She was too enamored by Dr. Cindy Thomas' presence.

"I should give you a quick tour before we get you into one of the classrooms! We've prepared the senior English class on your work and given them a quick overview of your theories regarding the shape of the quest narrative from the 16th and 17th centuries especially in regards to your attention to the male quester and the female nature guide. I am looking forward to hearing your thoughts on the homosocial relationship found in modern and postmodern narrative which removes the roles of women completely replacing all relationships with other male companions. Absolutely fascinating."

Tim choked as Dean Armanda finished talking. What was this lady on? People actually taught classes like this? He planned to never grow up and definitely not to go to school.

Brittany remained completely in-character as she laughed loud and haughty. "Oh please, Dean Armanda, you flatter me with your attention to my work! I would love to discuss it with you further in private."

The Dean flushed at Brittany's words and the flirtatious wink the scarf clad blonde threw in her direction. Sometimes Brittany couldn't help herself. Besides she had no idea what the hell this woman was talking about. It all sounded like crazy talk. But she understood flirting. And she definitely knew when she could exert a little influence.

"Of course. I would love it."

"Good. Me too." Brittany spoke lower in that sultry foreign accent. "Now show me around your school."

"Please call it an institute. We pride ourselves on providing young women with the opportunity to engage learning in the same manner they would if they were already in a higher education program. We boast that our girls only get accepted to the most prestigious institutions and we have a hundred percent record that all our graduates go onto college or university."

Brittany could already feel herself nodding off, but she continued to walk with the Dean. Tim pretended not to be paying attention, which was perfect since he really didn't want to hear whatever that woman was saying. His eyes were scanning each hallway and learning where different offices and places were located. They needed to know how to get around if they were going to find out what they wanted.

* * *

><p>Brittany's head was swimming from the tour. Luckily all she had to do was nod and make a funny comment. She had resorted to just saying the first thing that came to her head – the curtain, purple, Beauty and the Beast, the cost of gum at the gas store, how many mice could fit into a sardine can – and so many other things. Brittany had learned that no matter what she said, Dean Armanda would always laugh and nod as if they were sharing some secret joke.<p>

When the Dean had excused herself to go to the little girls' room, Tim rushed over to Brittany's side.

"Britt, I saw the IT room a few hallways down, but it looked locked and certainly more guarded than McKinley's tech stuff. Also I am pretty sure that if you really wanted you could totes get Dean Armetto to let you in her office. If ya know what I mean." Tim winked at her and pumped his hips back and forth.

"Stop! She's like a dinosaur. Besides we should be able to figure something else out before we have to resort to that."

"Okay so tech room first. How are we going to do that?"

"I think I have an idea. But I need you to make a big ruckus with LT in order for it to work during my talk."

"I can def do that. Just give me a signal."

"Do it when I start talking about BLTs."

They both grinned at the inside joke when the Dean reappeared.

"Oh I am so excited that you could give the girls a little taste of the type of research and projects they could be working on if you want to teach here come next fall!"

"Me too! Oh please lead the way to the room where I shall teach and fill their heads with book things!"

Dean Armanda laughed and Brittany shrugged her shoulders. She had to be doing something right.

The woman lead them into a classroom where girls were dressed scantily in skirts and button-down shirts. Brittany could feel her body heat at the sight. Damn. It looked like she had just walked into that Brittany Spears video. They all eyed her over with disinterest. Brittany would have done the same at some stranger walked into their class at McKinley.

"Class I am very pleased to announce that Dr. Cindy Thomas has come to give us a quick lecture on her work and perhaps give us a sample of one of her papers that just got published!" Dean Armanda indicated that Brittany should stand in the front of the class. Brittany did so. Tim stood in the back of the classroom and got into position holding LT in his arms.

Brittany had faced pressure before. She was the president at McKinley, one of the best cheerios on the squad, and she was the dance coordinator for glee club (she had completely taken over after she earned the job from Mr. Schue after the case of the missing trophy). This was nothing. "Good morrow-eve, class!"

The girls sat up a little in their chairs in order to give her annoyed and cruel smiles.

"This new teacher's hot." Someone shouted from the back of the classroom. The Dean's smile instantly vanished as she tried to find the source of the comment.

"Inappropriate, ladies, please your fullest attention." She turned back to Brittany.

But another voice popped up. "Why'd she bring a cat to class?"

The girls snickered and another voice answered. "Probably because she heard Crawford girls only like pussy."

"Yeah, but then why'd she bring the little boy?" All the girls turned to look at Tim and the cat in the back of the room. Tim tried to keep that air of aloof unawareness. He was dressed like a miniature intellectual. His mother had combed back his hair and dressed him in an argyle sweater with thick black glasses that of course didn't have any lenses in them.

Now Brittany panicked a little. It was time to jump into action.

"Class! Class! Your uttermost divided attention place it upon me!" She spoke in that strange accent again while waving her arms. "You shall _not _address the cat or the boy! The cat speaks to my soul and the boy speaks to the cat!"

The girls all looked at each other and made the unspoken, but unanimous decision that Dr. Thomas was crazy.

"Quickly! Fetch me one of those things that project an image on the wall through the means of wires!"

Again all the girls looked at each other. One in the front row raised her hand. "Do you need a computer hook-up?"

Brittany thrust her finger out and pointed excitedly. "Yes! One of those! I need one in order to continue my lesson! Go! Fetch it!"

Dean Armanda had been on the phone in the back of the room next to Tim and had missed most of the exchange. But now she lowered her phone and pointed to the girl who had spoken in the front of the classroom.

"Grace, why don't you come with me so I can get Dr. Thomas a laptop to use while she stays here. I regret I have been called away to some emergency in the cafeteria, but please find me after you finish up here. I am sure one of the girls can bring you to my office."

Grace left with Dr. Thomas leaving Brittany alone with the classroom full of girls.

"So what do you want to know about?"

They all looked at her like she was some sort of unicorn eating monster. At least she knew all about those. Hopefully one of the girls would ask that question. She hoped.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Santana had entered McKinley High School and immediately found Allie pacing outside the office. She wore her nurse scrubs and looked as if she had been working a late shift at the hospital. Santana prepared herself for the worst. Allie looked both exhausted and furious and nervous all that the same time.<p>

It hadn't been easy for the sisters, but Allie had always kept herself and Brittany going. Most of the time, Santana tried not to really analyze how and why she felt certain things, but she knew deep down why she had never really gotten along with Allie. They shared that family thing. Santana hadn't first realized why she hated Allie until she realized that Brittany and her sister shared something that San had never experienced herself.

So maybe she had been jealous of their relationship. Maybe. Santana didn't like to dwell on it often.

Allie was alright. Not the best, but alright. Of course she was perfect for Brittany so that's all that mattered to the brunette.

"Fancy meeting you here. Come to battle with the school board? I'm sure they'll be quaking in their penny loafers at the sight of your scary hospital scrubs." Santana gave her a look up and down. Allie looked like Brittany in that she was tall and blonde. She was pretty, no denying that, but she had never been the athletic type. So she didn't have the same body as Britt. "At least you could have tried to get some blood on it. I mean that would have at least been intimidating."

"Nice to see you too, Santana. Do you know where Brittany went this morning?" Allie threw her a suspicious look. She knew Santana always had a tracker on her younger sister.

"Nope. No idea."

"Figures." Allie rubbed at her eyes and looked around the hallway. "Where's this principal's office?"

"I can bring you there. Besides I heard from a certain blonde hottie that you might need some backup."

"You know you could just call her Brittany in front of me? We are sisters and I don't need to know every bit of your personal life."

"That wouldn't be as much fun." Santana shrugged and gave her a wink. "You coming?"

"Lead the way."

"Team Sally? Team Santllie? Wait." Santana smirked. "It sounds better as Team Saintly."

"What are you talking about?"

"Our team name of course!"

"You've been hanging out with Brittany too much."

"You know it."

* * *

><p>"And that is why I do not support the theory that Noah forgot the unicorns and that's why they no longer exist. In fact, I am pretty sure they didn't like the other animals and didn't want to be cooped up in a stinky pen for like 40 days or whatever so they skipped the ark completely. Makes sense."<p>

"As for the next question regarding Pegasi and Unicorns. They are _not _ the same thing. Pegasi are actually like unicorns' third cousins twice removed. It's a complicated family tree. There's a rhino in it and a few other animals that I don't even want to explain how they had children to create the unicorn." Brittany pointed to another girl raising her hand.

"Next."

But the door opened admitting Grace with a laptop. "Oh good! The laptop I requested! It's time to make the magic happen! It's BLT time!"

"What?"

"You want a sandwich?"

"When is this crackbrained professor leaving?"

Tim heard the signal and jumped into action. He flung LT across the room towards the girl holding the laptop. Poor Grace never had a chance. The machine flew from her hands and hit the floor with a dreadful noise of crunching electronic death. Everyone made a collective gasp. Including Brittany. Perfect!

"Oh no! The computer machine has had a terrible accident!"

Grace stuttered standing over the broken pieces of the laptop. "I swear I didn't mean to break it. Please. Do you think Dean Armanda will expel me?"

"Dear, dear, sweet child. It was my feline's fault! Bad kitty!" Brittany said in LT's direction, but the cat ignored her. "I shall take it to your machine place to get it fixed. Would you kindly show me the way?"

Grace nodded. Tim collected the broken laptop while Brittany collected the cat. The girls all watched as the strangest professor left the classroom.

"Tell me, Grace. Who runs the IT room?"

"That would be Jenny. She is also the head student worker for the Dean's office. She kinda does everything around here."

Jenny! Brittany knew a Jenny!

"I know a Jenny. The Jenny I know does a lot of things too mostly she's the Vice President of a school I know."

Grace laughed. "Jenny is the president here. I don't even think she has an executive board. She does everything herself."

Brittany frowned. That was strange. "And she works for the Dean?"

"Yeah. I mean I know you wanted to go to the IT room, but I can bring you to the dean instead."

"That would be great." Brittany wanted to meet this Jenny of Crawford Day. Coincidences always had to be followed.

* * *

><p><strong>Okay sorry it took so long. Don't worry now that the semester is over. I can get working on LT: P-EYE at the same pace I had been blazing at (2-3 chapters a week). I just need to find that motivation! Hahaha Thanks for all the comments and have a lovely week! Sorry if its rough I didn't proof I just needed to post it.<strong>


	17. Gradually PieRcing It Together

**So I was very excited to be back and writing again, but then that season finale happened. I just wanted to scream, throw things, and rewrite the entire episode and send it in. So I struggled to finish this since my original plan for writing this story, I would have probably finished this about two weeks ago before my heart was broken and we found out that B wouldn't graduate. Whatever. (Channeling my inner Santana.) My story will go on because where glee canon fails, we make it up with fanfic!**

**And yes! I did do well in my semester! Thanks for asking! I am happy to dedicate the summer to my own research and of course fanfiction! :D**

* * *

><p><strong>XVII. Gradually Pie(r)cing It Together<strong>

"Allie Pierce. My name is Allie Pierce. I am here for my sister, Brittany Susan Pierce." Allie said in the calmest voice Santana had ever heard spoken in the principal's office. That was quite a feat as she had seen many a rage induced Sue Sylvesters storm from here or even Mr. Schue yelling while Figgins would normally be spouting something about school policy or something else. So this was what an adult looked like?

Lame.

Santana had been ready to come into the office with razor blades, a shank, and just for good measure she would have brought brass knuckles. How could anyone doubt what Santana would do for her girl?

At times, she almost wished someone would dare to cross that line. Tim was probably the closet person to tread along that dangerous path in a really long time. And she had been ready to kill him…until she found out that he was thirteen and the most adorable dork in a jock's body that she had ever met. Damn Tim and his stupid plan that had separated them.

Mostly, Santana was angry at herself for being so whipped that she had agreed to the plan. She should have thought of something better. Figures they would leave Brittany's fate to a thirteen year old.

"Allie, give it up. Figgins is probably taking his afternoon siesta right now." Santana scowled. Glancing to her left, she could see that the Figgins' office had been equipped with new shades. Apparently, the school board had heard a few complaints. Perhaps one of them had been for Santana. That students were regularly catching the principal with his lids closed and dosing. Of course Figgins had informed them that he had merely been mediating. He was let off with a warning, but not before he installed new shades to keep prying eyes from seeing into the inner sanctum of his office.

"I don't understand. I have an appointment to see the principal and this is a very important matter. What's the hold up?" Allie ignored Santana's taunting. Really Brittany had thought sending Santana to be her backup was a good idea? The two girls barely got along. No matter what though, Allie had always and would always trust Brittany.

Out of the two girls, Brittany had that intuition, that sense which could instantly tell the nature of a person. Allie, on the other hand, had been their parents pride in joy in school. She had rapidly excelled in school and academics, but hadn't the same people skills as her sister. Maybe that's why she had never gotten along with the equally challenged Santana Lopez.

The office security fumbled around with some papers on her desk not masking the fact that she was annoyed and bothered by the intrusion. Most parents that came into the school, actually all, came with the sole purpose to complain or make trouble.

"Look, Ms…"

"Pierce! Her name is Pierce, Donna! Brittany is the school president and we are in here like every other day! The least you could do is remember her name!" Santana cut in agitated from her seat.

"First, my name is Dolores. And second, I could have you—"

"Sent to the principal's office?" Santana again cut in. She stood up from the chair ready to jump Donlores or whatever her name was. Allie sprung into action before Santana could make another move.

The nurse pushed down her sister's girlfriend back into the chair and blocked her out of Dolores' view. "Look, Dolores, I am very sorry. I apologize for Santana's behavior. It's just we are both a little stressed about Brittany's status and we want to get it resolved as quickly as possible. Is there any reason for the delay?"

The administrative assistant sighed behind her computer – the fifth computer that had to be replaced this year because of an irate Coach Sylvester. It was obvious this sister and Santana – and yes, she remembered who Santana was, the damn girl was in here every other day – were very concerned about seeing Figgins. Of course, Dolores knew why. She had been the one to give Figgins the notification from the school board requesting for immediate search for the girl's records. She had thought it odd then, and she continued to think the whole mess was ridiculous now.

"Ms. Pierce." She made sure to say the woman's name this time. No need to start the Lopez girl up again. "I understand that you are very upset right now. Unfortunately, our office's student worker has been sick all day. She normally keeps up with the appointments, but for some reason, our system seems to have wiped out all of them. So Principal Figgins was unaware that he would be meeting with you today."

"I literally spoke to him on the phone yesterday to confirm this. And you're saying that he couldn't remember one little time for me. I spoke directly to him."

"Fine. But could you please get him here as soon as possible?"

"I will try."

* * *

><p>"Oh God! That feels so good!"<p>

"Do you want some more?"

"Please, I've never felt like this before."

"Trust me, I can do so much for you and this school if you'll consider taking me as a teacher here."

"If you could do this every day, I don't know if I would even survive a semester without going insane with please! You are absolutely incredible, Dr. Thomas."

"I know." Brittany responded back with a pleased smirk on her face. This was definitely one of her specialties.

"I had no idea you could do such extraordinary things with a pussy. You'll have to teach me everything you know."

"And there's so much more." Brittany whispered back seductively into Dean Armanda's ear.

"Please just another dip."

"If you insist. The trick is getting it just warm enough."

The door to the office burst open with a thud. The noise sent Dean Armanda head flying up to see who had invade her private time with the prospective new teacher at Crawford.

"Dr. Thomas!" Tim shouted as he entered the office giving Brittany the weirdest look at the scene taking place in the dean's office. The dean lay on a long table in the corner of her room. She had on a towel spa style over her body as if Brittany had been giving her a massage except Brittany didn't look like she was giving a very good massage. In fact, she stood over the dean with a pot of cheese on the side of the table and a Lord Tubbington lazily sitting on the dean's bare back. LT looked up at Tim for a moment with a gaze of apathy before he continued to lick at the melted cheese on the woman's posterior. "I'm sorry to interrupt?"

Britt beamed seeing one of her partner's in crime solving. Really he had come at the perfect time. Dean Armanda was getting a little too frisky and into Lord Tubbington's alternative spa treatment. "Oh no dearest cat whispering boy! Please enter!"

"Yes, yes please come in, but do try to be quiet and not ruin the ambiance of the moment. Your mentor Dr. Thomas is absolutely fantastic! She tells me that you actually developed the technique." Dean Armanda groaned as Lord Tubbington increased the speed of his licking.

Tim looked up to Brittany. Gross.

"I did while studying in…"

"Canada!" Brittany popped in the answer.

Tim shrugged. Good enough. At least no one could complain that Britt wasn't fast thinking.

"Canada? How exciting. I bet they have some incredible felines up there."

"Yes, he's even getting a book published on the technique come next fall."

"Wonderful…wonderful…" Dean Armanda's eyes were already closing as she dosed off into another relaxed state.

"It's really incredible that you can operate such a large institution here, Dean Armanda."

"Really it's not as hard as it appears. Crawford has a long tradition and as such, it runs itself practically. Besides, we have such a large body of students to keep us running at all times."

Perfect! Brittany tried not to smirk as the woman had fallen straight into her trap. "I noticed that you even have an IT room. Do you have student help you there?"

"Actually, the whole thing is operated by one of our most astounding and active students, Jenny. I am so sorry that she couldn't be here to meet you. I would have loved to introduce you to each other. In fact, she normally works here with my secretary in the afternoons. That's why my poor assistant looked so swamped today. Jenny never showed up."

"How terrible! Well I am sure she had a good reason. I would have loved to have met her!"

"She would have most certainly been in your lecture today. I even sent someone down into our archives to see if she was there. Lord knows that she loves to go down there and check on student files just to make sure everything is still in order. I don't know how many times one can organize before they are perfect, but she sure is trying." Dean Armanda laughed as if she had made a joke. Brittany participated, but didn't feel very comforted.

Access to student files, the dean's office, and the IT department? This Jenny seemed like she would have every tool she needed to erased Brittany's records and do it without a problem! She frowned. It seemed so strange though. Why? And she couldn't possibly be Jenny from McKinley? That would be impossible! They needed a new plan, one which involved getting access to Jenny. Because even if she wasn't the culprit, maybe she could help them find out who in Crawford would be.

"Dean, I think that my cat and my assistant are having such a good time at your institution and our flight has been all messed up because of the rush to get here. Do you think that we could perhaps spend the night here? I am sure that you have an extra room open on campus."

"Well it would be highly unorthodox, but we do have a few spare guest rooms just in case. I would personally invite you to stay at my house, but I fear that it would be highly irregular of me."

Britt wrinkled her nose at the thought. First, that she might have to spend the night at Dean Armanda's house and second about her irregularity. She was pretty sure she watched some commercials about "being irregular" with Jamie Lee Curtis and she didn't want to have to eat yogurt or anything for dinner. She would spend the rest of the night starving!

"How lovely! I would fit the ambivalence of the place to get to spend the night here!" Britt said trying to copy some of the words that the other woman was casually throwing around. Her eyes met with Tim's and the boy nodded pleased.

"Dear boy." The dean moaned as Lord Tubbington moved to continue licking her upper back of the melted cheese. "If you look into my desk drawer over there, you can find the keys to our guest room. It's numbered 17. You can hang onto that key for safe keeping. I am sure that the office sectary can find something for you to do in the meantime while Dr. Thomas and your cat finish up here."

Again the two met eyes. Brittany gave Tim a thumbs up from behind the dean. Tim smirked as he crossed the room to find the key. But he gave Brittany another signal. Now was his chance to take the keys to a few other places on campus.

Britt took the hint. "Here let me add a little more cheese. Just relax and let the cat take care of your every need."

"Oh yes, please. What's this called again?"

Brittany hadn't actually told the dean a name to what she was doing because she had never attempted anything like this. So she blurted out the first this that came to her head. "Fondue for Two!"

"How delightful." The dean muttered as she dozed off yet again. Brittany gave a sigh of relief and eventually snuck away from the dean to head over to the desk that she had been talking about. Tim had already opened it and was deciding which keys they would need.

"Too bad I left LT's key duplicator at home." Britt said shaking her head in disappointment.

"He has one of those?"

"Yeah! We use it all the time! He normally steals a key and we trace a crayon around it on a piece of paper. And bam! Key duplicated. We haven't exactly worked out how to make a mold from that."

"Dang. That would have been helpful."

"I think we should just take them and hope she doesn't notice. I mean, she has like a hundred in here." Britt waved her hand over the desk which contained more than a hundred keys laid out on velvet with fancy script which told what each individual key went to. Already a few keys were missing so it wouldn't be a big stretch that she would forget who had what keys.

"Good idea, B-boss, but which ones?" Tim asked.

Brittany couldn't help but light up at the new nickname. She loved having Tim in LT:P-EYE. "Look around for like a master key or something. We definitely need to get into that IT room, but I think we need to look for a way into the dorms since this Jenny girl might be sick or hiding in her room."

"Oh! And don't forget that we might need to get into some personnel records. Where would that be?"

Britt frowned as she looked around the room. She spotted a small filing cabinet on the other side. Quickly she looked back down into the key drawer and found a small key hanging by itself. She handed it to Tim. "Here look in that cabinet for any name with Jenny and write down the room numbers while I find the other keys."

Tim nodded and hurried off making sure to be extra quiet as he passed the sleeping dean. But Lord Tubbington had other plans. Apparently, he wasn't a huge fan of his cheese diet being served on the back of a rather large and older woman. The cat turned as Tim crossed the room and made sure to meow loudly. Tim froze.

"LT. Keep it down." Brittany whisper yelled across the room.

But Lord Tubbington started to swat his tail across the dean's back. The new sensation made the dean start to make some new kind of noise. This couldn't be good.

Tim tried to calm the feline down. "Lord Tubbington, you are the Lettuce in our Team BLT. You are like the cool pillow that keeps it together cause the Bacon's a little salty and the lettuce is totally too juicy. You got to be cool, dude."

Brittany could have kissed the young boy a thousand times. He was so good and understood everything. How could they have had LT:P-EYE without him! There was no way that LT wouldn't understand that logic. Maybe Tim really was a cat whisperer! She glanced over to see if her Lord Tubbington felt the same way. For a moment, the feline paused and looked at Tim then glanced over at Brittany.

The truce never happened. The cat began to rub its tail furiously along the dean's neck while licking at the cheese on her back faster. The woman on the table began to moan at the new attack from the cat. Brittany grimaced and stuck out her tongue in disgust. Maybe Santana was right about LT being a horn dog. They had to work fast now.

"Go!" She whispered to Tim. The boy sprinted across the room and began to rummage through the cabinet. Each of them tried to ignore the strange noises coming from the cat and the woman in the room. Brittany's hands furiously worked around the keys trying to find one for the dorms. She did find one for the IT room in no time.

The noises were growing louder.

Blue eyes looked up and found Tim still scrambling for files. He had a notepad and was scribbling names and numbers with a pen from Armanda's desk. Good. At least they would have somewhere to start their search.

Suddenly the woman and the cat both let out the most terrifying and disturbing noise ever. Brittany jumped from the desk and grabbed a random key that had caught her eyes a few times, but didn't have a label. LT strolled away from the dean now and had a satisfied smirk on his face. Despite the fact that both Britt and Tim had jumped five feet in the air at the final noises from LT and Armanda, it seemed as if they had overreacted for nothing. The dean was now completely passed out and snoring quite loudly.

Lord Tubbington jumped lightly from the table and strolled over to Brittany wrapping himself around her leg.

"You were just trying to help us weren't you, Lord Tubbington?" She scratched under his chin and held him in her arms.

"I wouldn't call it that exactly."

"What? Now you are on San's side? Need I remind you that you are Tomato in this sandwhich! I don't want you turning breads and jumping this ship!"

"It's a team…" Tim responded.

"Team…Ship…what's the difference? You're stuck with us now, Tomato-boy!"

"Whatever you say, Bacon B-Boss Lady." Tim said with a smirk.

"Get all the Jennys and their room numbers?"

"Yup!"

"Good. Now we just need to check in with Santana and figure out our next steps from here. But let's get out of here before she wakes up."

"And wants a round two with the LT: P-EYE-M-P!"

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, back in McKinley High School, Santana and Allie had waited a good hour for Figgins to finally appear. He was lucky that he had come from the entrance of the office and not from his newly shaded inner office.<p>

"Ahh, Ms. Lopez, I thought that I would see you again. I just didn't expect to see you this soon. I hope that you and Ms. Pierce have solved your case because I already miss the paper ducks that Ms. Pierce likes to hang around the school." He spoke casually not even recognizing Allie was there at all. The principal hummed a little to himself as he walked through collecting some paperwork from Dolores.

"Principal Figgins, I hope that you hadn't forgot about our meeting."

"Of course not, Mrs. Delong! I am so happy to accept the award for principal of the year!" Figgins stuck his hand out for Allie to shake. Santana couldn't help but grin at the look on Allie's face. She had been nice and understanding up until this point, but she could tell that Figgins had just put her over the edge.

"You wish." Allie growled. "No, I am Allie Pierce. Brittany Pierce's older sister and guardian. We had a meeting arranged for an hour ago."

Figgins' face instantly fell. His eyes saw Santana in the corner and he grew worried. He did remember talking to an Allie yesterday about the poor Brittany's fate. "Of course, please step into my office, Ms. Pierce. I didn't forget. I was just accepting an award for principal of the year."

"Maybe in your day dreams…" Santana muttered under her breath as she followed them into his office. She made sure to close his door, but Figgins decided to close the blinds to the office. Santana didn't mind – more privacy. Perhaps they could pressure Figgins into letting Britt Britt pass.

"Take a seat. Can I offer you some water or tea?"

"No, I would really just like to talk about my sister so we can get this whole mess cleaned up right away."

"Of course, but may I ask why Ms. Lopez is here with you?"

Santana sat down next to Allie and raised her eyebrows threateningly towards Figgins at the question. He balked at her aggressive gesture and made sure to only look at Allie.

"She cares about Brittany as much as I do. I really don't see why it's a problem since she is the one who told me that I should make a point to come in and talk to you. She mentioned many times how nice, pleasant, and fair you were. In short, she assured me that you were possibly the greatest principal McKinley had ever known and you would be able to solve this problem in no time."

At first, Santana readied herself to jump in to deny any of the outrageous claims Allie was making all willy-nilly. But she caught on that she was buttering Figgins up by the way the principal instantly softened into his dopey smile. Oh how he did love a complement. And while he had been lying about the principal of the year award, he knew for certain that he was quite an amazing educator. Sometimes, he just wanted to hear it from someone besides his fish and his wife.

"Why thank you, Ms. Lopez, for your inspiring words of confidence to Ms. Pierce."

"Please call me Allie."

"To Ms. Allie Pierce." Figgins corrected himself…kinda before continuing. "But I regret to inform you both that I still have no jurisdiction on the matter. It was something brought up to me by the school board and therefore out of my hands."

Allie tried not to look as defeated as she felt at this information. She hadn't expected to woo Figgins into overturning the ruling, but she had hoped to gain just a little sympathy. "I have report cards. I have responses and notes from teachers! I even have copies of her homework because for awhile she refused to use the computer and only made hardcopies of her papers in crayon. I backed it all up and made copies at work. So I don't understand how you can say none of that exists!"

Santana almost choked. She had no idea that Allie did all those things for her sister. Maybe she had been too quick to judge the other blonde. In fact, it did sound like Allie cared for Brittany almost as much as Santana did because those were all things Santana would or did do for her girlfriend.

"Ms. Allie Pierce, the problem is that those things are too easy to forge and with the way kids are these days, there's no way of knowing or keeping track of those sorts of things. In fact, you could have colored those papers yourself. Besides they haven't been kept in our secure setting therefore they can't be recognized by the school board."

"Secure? You lost all of Brittany's grades! There's nothing secure about that! I want to talk to someone higher up!" Santana growled from her seat not holding back any longer.

Once again, Allie had to be the one to push the younger girl back down into her seat. She shot Santana a gaze that looked so familiar and steady that for a moment, Santana forgot that this was Britt's sister and not her Brittany herself. In that moment, San felt instantly reassured that everything was going to be alright. She would let Allie deal with Figgins.

"I didn't want to do this, Principal Figgins." Allie stood up from her seat and went over to the door of his office. She locked it and double checked that no one could get see through the blinds. Figgins looked at her suspiciously, but didn't move. Why did he need to worry about one woman? Really his eyes kept darting back to Santana as he remembered that she had that little Snixx problem.

"Do what?"

"You see I went through my records at the hospital because, unlike this school, the hospital actually keeps records of its patients and doesn't lose them. And if we did lose them, we would take responsibility and not blame it on the patient." Allie snapped as she reached down for the bag she had been carrying since she arrived at the school.

"I don't see what my medical records have anything to do with our conversation." Figgins now sounded worried.

Santana even felt chills go up and down her back at the tone of voice Allie was using. What was her angle? And what the fuck was she planning on doing? The mood in the office totally just hit creepy and real fast. "Allie?"

"You see, I read in your profile that you didn't like needles and that you were also missing some key ones that are required of you to be working in a public service position here at the high school. Now, you see, I think it's only my job as a citizen to administer the correct shots and vacancies in order to keep the students healthy." She pulled out an especially large needle from her bag and tapped at it. The sound of nails on the glass made an echo throughout the room.

Figgins visibly paled at the sight. Santana felt shivers go up and down her body. Fuck. Allie was one crazy son of a bitch! San couldn't believe what the woman was threatening to do. This had to be against a million different laws.

"Ms. Allopezrce." Figgins stuttered saying as he mixed all their names at once. "I don't see how you could possibly administer that shot to me. I am sure that you can't and I beg that you please don't do this."

Allie started to stick the needle into a small bottle drawing out a clear liquid into the hollow of the needle. Figgins let out a small squeak at the sight. He remembered that he wasn't alone in the room. His eyes sought out Santana's.

"Please, you have to stop her or get some help. I mean, she has to be unhinged."

"Oh, sorry, Principal Figgins, you see, at the moment I am controlling Aunty Snixx right now just like I was told I had to do in order not to get suspended from school. So I can't even leave this seat now. I am only following your orders."

His face turned another shade of green. "What do you want? I can't change anything. It's already been set in stone. The only way to reverse this is to find the McKinley files."

Allie nodded to acknowledge that she had heard Figgins, but she didn't stop prepping the needle. "I understand."

"Wait! That's it! You're not going to stop!" He asked frantic now.

"Well, I could be convinced to stop." Allie paused half-way around his desk with the dripping needle posed in the air. "If you told me all the people who had access to those files."

Figgins was sweating now. His eyes glanced to the needle trying hard not to pass out. "That's easy! No problem. Myself, Dolores, Sue, and the School Board."

"That's it?"

"Yes." Figgins said with relief that vanished the moment Allie took another step towards him. "Oh! And of course our student worker, Jenny."

"Jenny?" Santana shot up from her seat and grabbed hold of Allie's arm holding the needle. "The same Jenny that's on the student council shit with Brittany?"

"Yes, that Jenny! She's always around and she's been working for the office since last year."

"I think we've got our first real suspect, Allie."

Allie dropped her arm completely now. Figgins passed out right away.

"Fuck, Al, that was crazy! I can't believe you were actually going to do that! He looked ready to shit his pants."

Allie had started to pack away her gear from the hospital, but she stopped to look up and smile at Santana. "I wasn't actually going to stick him with the needle. Besides seeing that he was deathly afraid of needles, his file said that he was also very gullible and susceptible to suggestions. I wasn't planning to go that far, but I won't let Brittany's future put into jeopardy. Besides, I knew that if you were around, you would definitely get what you needed to continue your investigation."

"Wait, so you know we are investigating?" Santana asked with a frown.

"Of course you are. This is Brittany. And I know you would never let her down. Anyway, Figgins said that we need hard McKinley proof that Brittany passed all her classes. We'll never beat the school board without it. I know that you two will find a way. I just thought I could do a little to help."

Santana shook her head with disbelief. When had Allie become cool? No, not cool, that chick had been motherfucking badass right then.

"So…does this mean we are still going to be called Team Saintly because I think I might have just disqualified us for that one?" Allie asked with a smirk as they started to walk out of the office. They smiled and waved pleasantly to Dolores.

"Fuck no. That means Team Saintly is an even better name for us than before because now I know you can carry your own weight in badass now."

"Good. Now get out of here and make sure my baby sister graduates from this place. I don't know if I'll be able to walk back in here without a lawsuit on my hands."

"Not a problem, Allie." Santana said as they separated at the end of the hallway.

Her phone vibrated.

"Hey, B! You'll never believe what Allie just did to get our next lead!"

"You'll never believe what or who Lord Tubbington just did to get our lead over here!"

"Good we have a lot to catch up. I'll make it short. It's fucking Jenny, that bitch who's always all over you. She has to have something to do with all this shit. She's just nowhere to be found at McKinley though."

"Jenny? That's what we've found out too! Except I'm pretty sure we know why Jenny's not at McKinley and that's because she attends Crawford Day too!"

"How's that possible?"

"No idea, but we have the room numbers to all the Jennys here and a room to spend the night."

"Sounds like Dr. Cindy Thomas needs her driver to come by again?"

"You know it! Come over ASAP. Besides we need to make sure Tim gets home before dinner time tonight. His mom said he could only roleplay so much today."

"Be there soon, B. Love you!"

"Love you too!"

* * *

><p><strong>So this Jenny person is more mysterious! The girls are going to meet up again and hopefully finish the case together! Thanks for all the feedback and reviews!<strong>

**If you are craving some fluff and smut, my girl informed me that I hadn't written any in awhile so she convinced me to write a one-shot Brittana that you can also check out! It's very short, cute, and full of sexytimes to hold you off till next chapter. The pace will definitely be picking up! :D**


	18. DownGraded

**Thanks for all the adds and feedback from last chapter! I am getting a little upset that LT:P-EYE will be ending soon, but you guys make it awesome! We will have one more chapter.**

**Also oh fuck yeah! You guys broke the 50 reviews mark! That was sooooo cool! Thank you! Thank you!**

* * *

><p><strong>XVIII. DownGraded<strong>

_You ready?_

_Hw'd u gt my num again?_

_I took it off Britt Britt's phone! _

_Ur not allowed to call her that_

_She doesn't seem to care._

_I do_

_I'll ask her if it's okay!_

_No! Dnt do tht! Its fine. Whatev._

_Operation Switcheroo Scrappy-doo Kangaroo is now rolling!_

_Rlly? U jst picked words that rhymed didnt u?_

_No, that'd be silly! This is the real deal!_

_Whatev. Whts the plan alrdy?_

_You come through the front gates like you did before and pick me up!_

_Thts it? U kiddin me?_

_Nope! That's the plan! Then you drive me out and give me to my mother and then come back in! Perfect plan is perfect!_

_Ur lucky B likes u._

_Give it up, Santana, you know you love me too. Now come pick me up!_

Santana closed her phone with a sigh. The thirteen year old boy would be the death of her. Seriously, when did Tim become their plan man? He could barely keep from fawning over Brittany and Santana. Yet, he seemed to consistently come up with these ideas during their cases. But he added something special to their team dynamic. Plus, it meant that Santana had someone to pawn Lord Tubbington off.

She was parked a block away from Crawford and in her car. Tim's mother idled a few inches behind her Mercedes. Tim's mother had been more than willing to help the girls out if it meant that her son could be placed in an especially stressful situation. Apparently she believed that it would help him with his acting. The commercial had gone really well and Tim's agent was already trying to get them to move out to California. At one time, Santana thought that she and Britt could have done that, but now that Brittany wasn't going to graduate, the shorter girl had to think differently.

But she wasn't about to let her girl drop back to freshman year. First, that would be ridiculous since she had passed all her other years. Second, she loved Brittany and she knew her girlfriend was a genius. No matter what Tim suggested, it was always Brittany who figured out the specifics and made their plans possible. Even now she had somehow managed to woo the dean and procure a room key for the night.

Genius.

This time when she pulled around, Tony/Andy/Whatever-His-Name didn't even bother to stop the car. He automatically lifted the arms of the gates to let Santana in. Once again, she was wearing her chauffeur outfit – black slacks fit perfectly to her ass, a plain white shirt, a black jacket, and a driver's cap. At least she looked the part. She gave the man a tip of that hat as she drove past and he returned the gesture.

She flipped around to the front of the building and waited for Tim. In about two seconds, Tim came bounding down the stairs caring a very perturbed Lord Tubbington. The cat appeared about as happy as a rock. Santana imagined that being carried by Tim was something akin to being strapped into a roller coaster ride at all times.

The boy flung open the door and climbed into the front seat with LT on his lap.

"See I told you, perfect plan is-"

"Perfect!" Santana finished the sentence for him sharply. Tim looked at her in surprise at her tone. But the smile that spread across her lips relaxed him instantly. They exchanged winks.

"My mom waiting for me?"

"Yeah." Santana said, but she wasn't paying attention to Tim anymore. LT's cat eyes were gazing up into hers. "You had to be bring Lard Tubbers huh?"

"Britt Britt said that she was worried that if she kept LT all night that the dean would track her down at night and make her play with the cat. They were doing some really weird stuff. You would have never believed it, captain."

Santana scrunched her face at the idea of LT, Britt, and some other woman doing "some really weird stuff." She didn't want to know. The Latina did however smirk at her nickname from Tim. The boy did have a way of worming himself into her heart. "Anything I need to be worried about?"

"Nah." Tim smirked and they did one of their secret handshakes. "B is def still your girl. No worries there. That's never gonna change."

"You know…you're not so bad, Tim. Let's get you back home before your mom takes you out of LT: P-EYE." Santana threw the car into drive. "You're gonna watch LT for the night?"

"Yeah, B-Boss asked if I could watch him. Apparently, he's been getting into all sorts of stuff at her house when he's left by himself. Allie complained that she was missing underwear and perfume."

Santana tried to ignore that last bit of information. She really didn't need to know how LT rolled. But if Britt was trusting Tim with LT, then the kid had to be doing something right. "She must really trust you."

They drove off.

* * *

><p>Santana returned through the guard entrance ten minutes later and once again nodded to AndyTony. Again he nodded back at her. And some people (like Miss Pillsbury) thought that she had a hard time making friends! Ha! She was great at it.

She got out of the car for the first time at Crawford Country Day. And she could say that she was impressed. The girl they sent to show her around waited at the top of the stairs in a very short skirt and button-up shirt. The dirty-blonde haired girl definitely looked Santana up and down both judging her and checking her out at the same time. This was the kind of place Santana could get used to.

Damn.

"So you are Dr. Thomas' driver?" The girl asked as she popped a bubble from her gum and opened the doors to the institution. The girl was practically dripping with attitude. "Aren't you a little young to be a professional driver?"

"Reason you're asking?" Santana shot back.

"Nope. I just thought a hot chick like you could be modeling or something. Not that I'm complaining because I like the outfit."

Santana's mouth dropped. She couldn't believe how brazen the girl was to an adult. What did they feed the girls at this school? It was hot, but damn. Thankfully, Santana didn't have an opportunity to respond as she noticed a tall blonde covered in scarves and brilliant colors walk down the hallway towards her.

"How smashing! You've returned with my charioteer!" Brittany called towards them. Santana had to resist the urge to snort in laughter.

"Right. Well…" The girl looked between Santana and Brittany. She didn't miss the deep gaze they both shared. "You two can follow me to your rooms. You won't be with the student population, but we do have a small section of the dorms for guests. Occasionally professors will live here for a semester before they settle into the area with their own houses."

"Where are the student dorms located?" Santana asked trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

"Oh just down the hall." The girl led them through a few more hallways before she arrived at a door with ornate decorations for fawns and trees carved into the wood. Damn this place was fancy. Both Britt and San pretended like they weren't impressed. "Did Dean Armanda give you the key? Because I was only supposed to show you the door."

"Oh right!" Brittany jumped from behind and pulled out one of the keys that she had taken from the office. "No problem. Thanks and I'll shall see you a fortnight from now in class."

"Yeah…sure…" The girl responded before she flipped her hair and sauntered away from them making sure so sashay in her little skirt.

Brittany made sure not to look at Santana yet even though her whole body hummed now that they were reunited. There weren't many times during the course of a day that they would separate. Sure there were times when they got pulled away from each other, but today they had been apart for the entire day. Britt's body literally ached now. She could reach out and touch her, but the blonde resisted. They had to maintain appearances. Finally she shoved the right key into the hole and turned the knob.

The room exuded the same sense of entitlement that filled the rest of Crawford Country. The bed was king size with a ridiculous amount of fluff and covers that probably weighed more than the two girls combined. On the walls hung a variety of beautifully painted landscapes to add to the aura of the room. Brittany didn't want to waste anymore time checking out the bedroom though. They had other plans. They probably wouldn't be in the room for most of the night anyway. LT:P-EYE had work to do.

She turned right as the door closed right into her girlfriend. Santana didn't resist. It had been an obnoxiously long day without Brittany.

"Hey." Santana whispered as she pulled on one of Brittany's various scarves.

"Hey back at you." Brittany whispered with a smirk. "I missed you."

"From what I've heard, it seems like you did just fine without me. In fact, it seems like I should be worried about you an cougars now."

"I wouldn't call Lord Tubbington part of the cougar family. More like the majestic lion or even the cute little ocelots."

Santana smirked pulling on the rainbow colored scarf just a little harder. "I wouldn't give LT that much credit. Maybe in the Garfield family."

"Nah, LT's much better than Garfield." Brittany returned Santana's playful smirk as she worked herself closer to her girlfriend. "Whatever Tim told you, it's probably true."

"Good." Santana leaned now into Britt's taller muscular body and pressed her lips against the exposed skin of her collarbone. The blonde sighed appreciating the slightest of touch from her girlfriend. Her plush lips peppered Brittany's neckline as her hands pushed away at the layers of scarves letting them fall to the ground lifelessly. "Because he told me that I had nothing to worry about since my girl was totally into me."

Brittany allowed herself to let out a soft moan at the contact of lips on her skin. Fuck. She had missed Santana. Because they hadn't been at school together, they missed their afternoon romp in the janitor's closet and their daily game of feel each other up to make glee interesting. That had to be Britt's favorite game despite the numerous cease and desist letter they had received from Rachel Berry. Her letters were typed on letterhead and reminded B and S that not only were they distracting themselves from getting better, but their antics disturb quite a few of the members of glee club.

The blonde had been upset about the letter at first, but Santana reminded her girlfriend that Puck didn't mind. In fact, the only boy who complained was Blaine. So she didn't have to worry about the glee kids kicking them out.

"Did you meet up with Allie?" Britt asked trying hard to resist the temptation to jump Santana and fuck her up against the door.

"Yeah. We made Team Saintly and totes got all the information from Figgins." Santana murmured against Brittany's light skin. Her lips continued to travel up the girl's neck grazing when possible and teasing at all times. "Tell me we have some time before we have to keep investigating."

Brittany was only half listening to Santana's words. She was entirely too distracted. The blonde bent down finally unable to take it anymore. Her lips captured Santana's. At first, the shorter girl resisted and pulled away for a second, but Brittany didn't let her get far. Her hands jumped forward and snagged either side of her face and drew her back to her. Their lips crashed in a deep sensual kiss. Mouths parted smoothly allowing tongues to trace along plump lips and run along teeth and each other.

Santana closed her eyes and leaned her body into the one holding her. Her skin tingled at the feel of long fingers stroking the sides of her face and running lines down along her jaw and dip below to her neckline.

"Shit." Britt breathed against Santana's ear. Her hot breath caused the brunette to shiver at the sensation. Santana's fingers had worked their way down the tall girl's body and into the hem of her pants. She had casually flipped up the bottom of her shirt to allow her access to her perfectly sculpted abs. Her nails dragged along skin. She smiled hearing the sharp intake of breath. San loved knowing the way she affected her girlfriend. Britt's body squirmed at the contact. A finger pulled at the edge of her pants and she wanted more than anything for Santana to undo her pants and shove her fingers up her pussy.

"Wait. Fuck." Santana finally pulled back from her girlfriend's body. The look on Britt's face said it all. She was not happy at the intrusion.

"What's wrong?" The blonde asked. Her fingers were already unbuttoning the first of Santana's driver shirt. Santana almost gave in again as Britt's finger's made quick work of her shirt.

"Wait, B, we can't start this. You know that once we start we won't start. We go for hours."

"That's not a bad thing. Right?" Britt asked with a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

"We can't fool around until you're back at McKinley and walking down the aisle with me to get our diplomas!"

"Walking down the aisle?" Britt asked with a wink of her own. She loved getting San riled up.

"Hey." Santana flustered at Brittany's question. A deep red spread through her tan cheeks and her body heated. "I-it's just-I-I want us to walk- you know get them together."

"I know." Brittany said. She bent over and kissed her quickly on the lips to assuage Santana's flustered words.

"So what's the plan? I haven't been here yet so I don't know what you and Tim have been looking for."

"No problem." Brittany went to the bed and plopped down. Spreading out the sheet of paper with the room numbers of the Jennys at Crawford and the keys she had lifted from the dean's office. "Tim got all the Jennys and I got a master key to the dorms probably something the janitor would use to get in."

"Okay, so what, we are just going to go up to every door and look for Jenny and then ask her to politely release your records?"

"Good plan, right?"

Santana rolled her eyes. Their plans had been crazy up till now so what was to change this time? Shrugging, Santana picked up the list. There were five names on it. All Jenny and all of them lived on campus.

"Okay, Brittany Sherlock Pierce, how are we going to just wander around? You're now the infamous Dr. Thomas and I look like a driver. So it'd be kinda suspect to let us just walk around in an all girl's school."

"That's where Team BLT rocked the house, San. While LT and I were distracting the dean, Tim was wandering around using one of his many disguises. I think he was using thirteen-year-old-boy-wandering-around-Crawford-disguise. He managed to find a supply closet with uniforms."

"So we can blend in?"

"Yup."

"Wait." Santana thought of a delicious image that just crossed through her mind.

"What now, baby?"

"You're going to wear one of those uniforms?"

Brittany only smirked in response.

* * *

><p>"Come here. You can't wear it like that!" Brittany said as she finished buttoning up her own blouse. It wasn't that bad. Really these private school girls did know how to accentuate the female body and Britt wasn't complaining. "Oh my god, you look like a nun or something like that!"<p>

Santana giggled and let herself be pulled towards Britt. She had a maroon head band holding her dark hair from her face. Her blouse was neatly buttoned and pressed, but she had forgotten to roll her skirt up. It hung below her knees. When she stood in front of the mirror, she had busted up laughing with Brittany. "What? You don't like chaste Santana? No sex for you!"

They continued to laugh as Brittany's hands easily worked the skirt up. She didn't stop until she was satisfied that Santana's legs were showing almost everything leaving practically nothing for the imagination. "Much better. I don't want to be walking around with the Crawford Day version of Rachel Berry."

Santana was about to agree, but she caught sight of Britt as she stood back. The tall blonde cheerleader's skirt had also been rolled. And she had legs that went on for miles. She had pulled her hair back into two braids on either side of her head. Fuck.

"You look real good like this, B."

"I know it." Brittany winked at her as she pulled her hair back into a long blonde pony. "Now let's go! We have a lot of ground to cover and not that much time. I was talking to one of the girl's and they said that monitors go around at 10pm to make sure all the girls are in their beds. That only gives us an hour and a half to find all the rooms and confront Jenny."

"Right." Santana nodded as she pushed open the door to the supply closet. One of the keys Britt had stolen also happened to unlock the door. They had been really lucky so far. "I still don't understand how Jenny can be going to two schools at once."

"We don't know that yet! We just have to assume that this isn't our Jenny until it's proven. Besides, maybe she has one of those magic things that can go back and forth in time or whatever."

The coast was clear. No girls in the hallways and no adults walking through checking.

"Come on, B. Time to get our investigatings on!" Santana tugged at her girlfriend's hand and pulled her through the door. They popped out, but didn't disconnect their interlocking fingers. At the sight of a door opening, both girls gripped each other just enough to reveal their nervousness. A girl dressed in matching uniform popped out of one of the common rooms. For a moment, the hallway filled with laughter and girl's voices before the door closed again. The girl walked out of the room towards Santana and Brittany. True to their investigating prowess, Brittany smiled pleasantly at the girl while Santana glared almost daring the girl to question why they were in the hallway.

It seemed the girl didn't care. In fact, she just smiled at Brittany and continued to walk down the hall past them.

"Cloooooooose one." Brittany whispered under her breath.

"Okay so first Jenny should be in the hallway next to this one."

"How do you know that?"

"The signs at the end of each corridor. Look." Santana pointed. Apparently they were about to hit the junction of Woolfe Hall. The arrow pointed to the right and left. "Easy."

"Okay Room 419." Brittany said and pointed to the right. They walked down the hall nodded casually towards any girls that passed them. No one asked or questioned them. Everyone seemed amicable towards them.

"Should we knoc-" Santana was about to ask, but Britt was already pounding her fist on the door.

The door opened very quickly. A red-headed girl popped out and looked at them as if she was expecting someone else. Her face dropped revealing her disappointment. Definitely not who she was waiting for.

"Can I help you?"

"You wouldn't happen to also go to McKinley High School? Or work for the IT department?"

The girl shook her head confused. Something didn't seem right about the two girls. Jenny had never seen them around school before and most of the girls did know each other. Her brow furrowed. "Who are you and why are you asking these questions?"

"No reason." Santana asserted with an unspoken threat towards the girl.

Britt stepped in. "No reason. We're new and we're trying to find this Jenny because my friend told me to talk to her about any computer problems I had. Well I am having them. Any suggestions on where that Jenny might be?"

The story fit so this Jenny shrugged at the explanation and the question. "Nope, sorry. I know who you're talking about. I just don't know where she lives."

"Thanks anyway."

The door shut and Brittany promptly crossed off the first number on her sheet. "One down."

They continued to walk through Crawford checking up on doors and Jennys. Not once did they find someone who could point them in the right direction. They would know exactly what Jenny looked like if she opened the door, but fuck they just had to find her first. They were down to the last three names on the list.

"Okay. This is the one. It has to be. I have a good feeling about it."

"You said that at the last door, Britt."

"Yeah and it turned out that I was right because it had been a good door!"

"That's because that Jenny let you touch her cat and have some candy."

"I liked that Jenny."

"I know. You said that about a thousand times before we left."

"She was a good Jenny."

"Whatever. Let's get this over with. We are running out of time and no matter how much I like looking at girl dressed in skirts, I definitely don't want to spend another day here. This place is fucking creepy."

"You like it. Don't pretend you don't." Brittany winked as she knocked on the door. They both relaxed waiting for the door to be answered. But when there was no response, Brittany knocked again. Another minute went by. Finally Santana pounded on the door.

"Open the fuck up! Security."

Still nothing.

"Now what?"

"We aren't spending another fucking day here. Use that key that you took for all the dorm rooms."

"Great idea!" Brittany rummaged through her skirt pockets pulling out the room masterkey.

"Genius. Now let's check this out so we can get to the next room."

They should have known that Room 2919 wasn't like the other rooms they had been knocking on. First, the room was at the end of a hallway and therefore was bigger than the other ones. Not only that, but the room didn't have anything written on its dry erase board or decorations with names.

No, Room 2919 had a very different feel. The door swung open.

"Da fuck?" Santana whispered under her breath as Britt turned the light switch on. "What the fuck?"

"What is all this?" Brittany responded with her own question. Both girls were mesmerized and shocked at the sight. On every wall there were papers and schedules, plans, color coded bindings connected by strings and lines that ran across the entirety of the wall. It looked like one of those crazy people's rooms when they are trying to solve a government conspiracy. But this wasn't a conspiracy, or at least not the usual kind.

"What the fuck does this Jenny do?" Santana stepped forward and pluck a random piece of paper from the wall. It disturbed the perfectly arranged webbings around the room. Other papers shook and the strings which were attached jiggled at the force of Santana's yank. In her hand, Santana held a printed copy of Columbia University's requirements for incoming freshmen. Why would Jenny need that? They had to have the wrong Jenny.

But she looked up and noticed a picture on the wall. The Jenny that Santana had bullied and threatened quite often at McKinley High stood next to Dean Armanda and another girl. Jenny was holding a plaque like she had received an award. "I think this is the right Jenny, babe."

"Yeah me too." Brittany responded. She was arm deep in the papers on the desk and the ones on the wall. "She literally has all her classes scheduled out on the wall with these colors to indicate which ones are at McKinley and which ones are here at Crawford. But it's even crazier since it looks like she attends some at the same day. That would be impossible!"

"Even worse. Who and why the fuck would anyone want to go to go to school not once, but twice every day? That shit cray." Santana rifled through a few more papers looking for more clues. "There's got to be something that we can use to find what she did with your grades. Why would she come after you anyway? She practically worships the ground you walk on. If she wanted to destroy anyone, why wouldn't she come after me?"

"I don't know…" Brittany shuffled around some more papers on the desk.

Santana looked to the opposite wall and realized that there was another color on there that wasn't used where Britt was. The blue caught her attention. San moved over to find out why Jenny used the color blue on only one part of her crazy wall.

The blue color highlighted Brittany S. Pierce over and over again. Articles that talked about Britt's dancing, cheerleading competitions, and even articles talking about the glee club which mentioned the blonde were drowned in blue highlighter. Not only that, but Jenny had created a schedule chart similar to the one which tracked her classes from McKinley to Crawford. Except this one had all of Britt's classes, practices, and club meeting times. Even more disturbing was the times slotted for S. Santana assumed that she had to the "S" written over and over again. The "S" seemed to only be there to figure out where and when Brittany would be somewhere.

"What the fucking fuck? What the fuck is this?" Santana muttered. She couldn't help it. She had to take down some of the stalker wall. Her hands tore at papers and ripped them from the wall. How could anyone want to hurt someone as beautiful and kind as Brittany. Jenny had to be a monster. "Baby we are getting out of here. We're finding this Jenny chick and I am going to cut her."

"You're looking for Jenny?"

The door opened. Both Santana and Brittany jumped about five feet in the air. They weren't prepared for anyone else coming in.

Brittany recovered first. "Yeah, we were looking for our friend, Jenny. She said she could be either at her room or her favorite place. Which is so weird since she didn't tell me where that is…Who are you by the way?"

"I'm Jenny's roommate. And no problems. I totally understand." The girl was taller than most of the other Crawford girls they had seen. She had long auburn hair and a pretty face. "My name's Cindy."

"Hi, Cindy. Like my friend said…we're trying to find Jenny. Is there any place where she would go to meditate?"

"Well, I mean, I've seen Jenny go downstairs downstairs. I mean like below the IT room. Sometimes I call it the Batcave."

"What do you mean?"

"It's hard to explain. It'd be better if I just showed you. She has this whole secret room down there. I mean I've never been in, but that's why I understand about it anyway."

"Lead the way!" Brittany said looking around. Santana hesitated for only a moment. How did they know they could trust her? Unfortunately, it seemed they had no choice. They needed to find and confront Jenny to get to the bottom of this.

* * *

><p>They had been following Cindy for a few minutes. The girl walked leisurely down the halls of Crawford. This time as they were walking through, there weren't as many girls in the hallways. In fact, it was getting closer and closer to curfew. Girls were walking at a faster pace to get to their bedrooms and clear out of the common rooms. Cindy didn't pause to offer any hellos. Instead she focused on telling Santana and Brittany about the history of the school.<p>

So-and-So committed suicide here. Some famous woman used to live in this room. This wing was blessed by the pope. This room had a Satanic ritual performed in it. This was the presidential suite. Someone's daughter was living here for the semester because her parents thought Crawford was better than actually sending her to rehab. And so on.

At last, they arrived at the IT room that Britt and Tim had spotted during their first tour around the institution. It had been locked when Tim had tried to sneak into it while Britt and LT were giving the dean a fondue for two.

Cindy pulled out a set of keys and inserted the key into the door. It opened easily. Not surprisingly, the IT room at Crawford look very similar to the one at McKinley where Lauren and all those nerds hung out. The only difference was the lack of other nerds. Santana remembered there had been like six boys and Lauren hanging out and playing with electronics on the desk with some board game on the table.

"So where is Jenny's secret room?" Santana asked. Her eyes darted about trying to gain some sense of where they were and what else was in the room. Most importantly, she reached out to touch Brittany lightly on the hand.

"I've seen her sneak back here. Hopefully she's back here. If not, I have no idea where she could be." Cindy said with a shrug and walked to another door similar to the one Lauren had popped out of. But no one opened it. Cindy opened the door. It led to another small hallway also dimly lit. Where were all the fancy lights and special looking shit now? This place was fucking creepy.

"She actually stays back here? This place is like out of some bad horror movie set."

"Yeah, it's just a little bit further." Cindy led them forward down the hallway past old broken tv sets, wires, and other assorted shit that had been abused by years of students and teachers. "Here."

Cindy brushed aside a stack of old books and papers to show them another door. This one didn't have any markings on it.

"Let me help." Brittany moved forward to lend Cindy a hand pushing things aside. "It's like no one ever comes down here. I can't believe she can run all the tech in the school by herself."

"Yeah, she's really driven. The type of person who doesn't let anyone get in her way." Cindy grunted as she pushed aside an old television stand. "Can you get in now?"

Santana gave Britt a tiny push over the pile they had accumulated so that the blonde could reach the handle.

"Yep. Oh and it's unlocked!" Britt said enthusiastically as she pushed open the door. The momentum and the way both she and Santana had been awkwardly pushing on the door caused them to tumble into the room.

It was pitch black.

"Ow. B, watch your feet."

"Yeah well watch your skirt cause I don't even think it's on anymore."

"That's cause your hand is up it!"

"Can you see anything?" Brittany asked as she struggled to get up.

Santana looked up from beneath Britt towards the door they had just toppled from. The dim light from the hall contrasted the absolute darkness of the room so she could clearly make out Cindy's silhouette standing there. But she didn't move to come in and help them.

"Cindy, is there a light switch? Can you hit it for us?" Brittany called to the girl at the door, but she didn't respond.

"Yo, Cindy! Hit the fucking light!" Santana yelled as she sat up rubbing her elbow. Sometime sharp must have cut her during her fall. She looked up and swore she could see Cindy shaking her head. "What's wrong with you?"

Finally a voice responded. "Sorry. I have to do this. I'll come back for you eventually, but you have to stay in here at least for awhile."

"What the fuck does that mean?"

"In here?" Britt asked.

Suddenly the door slammed shut and the sound of a key locking it echoed around them. Both girls sprinted from the ground towards the already fading light. But they were too late. Santana whacked her fists repeatedly on the door shouting in Spanish and English. Nothing good. Brittany kept turning the knob on the door over and over again. Noises outside the door echoed throughout the room.

"Let us the fuck out! When I get my hands around your neck, I am going to kill you! You fucking hear me, Cindy! I will fucking kill you! Let us out!"

"She's sealing us in here." Brittany breathed defeated against the door. Everything they had just moved away from the door was now being moved back into place. Even if someone came down here, nothing would look out of place.

"We're so fucked." Santana spit in anger. The palms of her hands relaxed as they ran down the door. Both girls slumped with their backs to the only way out. They were definitely fucked.

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><p><strong>Shit just got real! Trapped! One more chapter left and a Jenny to confront! What's next for LT: P-EYE! Could this be the end?<strong>

**And because I am a big fan of teasers, I wanted to post the first few paragraphs of my next story, **_**Sirens.**_** It starts with Puck, but it's pure Brittana. I am so excited, I needed to share my excitement!**

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><p><strong>Sirens. Always the sirens. <strong>

**They drew in from all sides like a call too dreadful and yet too alluring to ignore. No one seemed able to heed their real meaning which meant to stay away. Instead people milled about huddling closer and closer to the yellow police caution tape and pressed against the harsh words which explicitly stated Do Not Cross. Had they been aboard a ship and told not to heed the sirens' call, they would have been inevitably crashed against the sharp rocks of the seas. Their bodies would have been strewn and cast into Neptune's depths and made to feed the fishes and creatures of the deep. **

**He flicked his cigarette to the street and ground it out with the heel of his boot. **

**Noah Puckerman had known sirens. He had known many sirens his entire life – the kind that meant a car crash, the kind that pulled over a speeding car, the kind that signaled a need to slow down for children, the kind that blared over an intercom or announced a goal scored, or paraded down the street for a celebration, or faded away to some distant tragedy across town, and yes, he had known the human kind of siren as well. Beautiful woman able to capture the soul with notes, express your deepest fears and highest elations. Women who had been able to tear him apart with only a few words of lyrics sung in perfect pitch to which no man or woman could resist. He had known those sirens and at one point been graced enough to sing with them. **

**But no longer.**

**He lit another cigarette and ducked under the yellow tape towards the sirens. It seemed that no matter what kind – woman or tragedy – Puck had never been able to tear himself away from the soul-wrenching sound in order to steer himself clear towards safety; towards home. No, he had spent his life crashing again and again upon the rocks only to wash away and hear another call beckoning to splinter him once again. He had never turned away.**

"**What do we have here?" He asked one of the patrolmen. **

**The man glanced once at Puck then to the credentials in his hands. "Nothing that I can talk about detective. In fact, they haven't let anyone near. Our orders are to stay here and make sure no pictures, no people, and definitely no press get through."**

"**Thanks. Want one?" He offered the patrolman a cigarette.**

"**Can't supervisor is watching. Thanks anyway detective."**

**Puck shrugged and placed the pack back into his jacket. He pulled the jacket closer to his body. Fuck New York had to be cold. His head remained uncovered although he wished he would have remembered to wear his baseball cap at least. His shaved head seemed naked against the cold at night. **

**He took two more steps towards where all the commotion was. Already the coroner had arrived and the forensics team. A few people he recognized and had worked cases with before, but something seemed off especially with the looks people were giving him. Homicides were always a serious business, but most of the time people would at least bother to give a head nod or a friendly welcome. Those small pleasantries sometimes were the only things that kept Puck sane in this harsh world. **

"**Noah." A voice sounded behind. Puck turned back. Only a few men would dare to call him by his first name. He had lots of nicknames, but Noah wasn't a common name thrown about. **

"**Chief, what's the situation here? This isn't my normal call."**

**His commander wore a jacket similar to Puck's serviceable, no bullshit type. At the age of forty-five he was already balding and he sported a large body that hadn't seen action on the street in probably a few years. For the most part they had a pretty decent relationship. **

**Chief Macklin pushed his hands through the remaining strands of his hair as he approached Puck. "I know this isn't your normal beat, but I wanted to be the first person to tell you. I just didn't think that you would show up. It's not a good place for you to be right now, Noah." **

**Again he used his first name. Puck should have realized the situation the first time, but now the second time jarred him. He grew suspicious. "Why? What would you need to tell me away from a crime scene?"**

"**Why don't you come with me and we can talk about it over a burger at the diner."**

"**Chief, don't fuck with me now." Puck felt anger now replacing his caution. Why would he would try and take him away?**

"**I don't think it's one of your friends, but-"**


	19. Grad  ification

**Again thank you so much for all the readers who started LT:P-EYE and went through all three cases with me. It's been a blast. Thank you to all my readers who jumped on and added your comments and alerts. As my first fic, it's been an absolute pleasure! Thank you! Thank you! :D**

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><p><strong>XIX. Grad-ification<strong>

"You know." Santana started to say. Her left hand held her cell phone. She flipped it open for about the five hundredth time since that bitch, Jenny's roommate, had locked them in the room to nowhere at Hogwarts School for sneaky conniving girls.

Room of Requirement? Fuck that and fuck that bitch for locking them in this place with the most cryptic message ever. Like what the fuck did she mean that she had to lock them up and not only lock the door, but also barricade them in.

"We wouldn't have been in this room for this long if LT was useful for once."

"Aww, lay off him, San. This is like the fifteenth time you've brought him up." Brittany sat across the dark room playing with some crumpled up pieces of paper on the floor. They had been sitting on the floor for the past hour. The first hour, Santana had beat at the door until Brittany was sure that it would break off or the hinges would loosen, but it never happened. Finally they had both given up trying to break out of the room. Then they tried to find an alternative route, but that had failed too.

Santana was not taking her incarceration well.

"If Lord Tubbers was called Lady Lassie and a dog, we would have been out of here by now. All I'd need to do was yell really loud and say 'Help! We're stuck in the well of shame and stupidity falling for the oldest and dumbest trick in the book at Crawford Bitch School and Lassie T would come running up and dig us out of here!" Santana was definitely not taking their imprisonment well.

Brittany frowned across the room. They had chosen to put some distance between themselves in order to spread out and search for a way out, but they had ended up remaining like that. It turned out to be a good thing since Brittany now scowled in the dark at Santana's latest jab towards her feline companion.

"Santana, do I need to remind you again that Lord Tubbington is not a dog and will not be able to rescue us because he is enjoying a lovely night with Tim. Second, you've been very mean to him recently, so I don't even know if he would use his powers to come and save us anyway."

"His powers..." Santana scoffed in the darkness finally allowing her phone to close. The Latina shifted on the floor still huffing about their predicament. For the five thousandth time since they had been trapped, she flipped her phone open again. It was now 10:29pm and her cell phone was losing power. They had been trapped for what seemed like forever. She slammed the phone back into the pocket of her skirt and stood up. It was still incredibly dark, but her eyes had adjusted to the lack of light. There were some old desks, chairs, a few filing cabinets, and miscellaneous other things scattered about the room. She felt trapped.

And yes, she knew she was literally trapped.

But this was worse. "B…"

Brittany looked up from the floor where she had been pushing at that piece of paper for minutes. A certain heaviness hung in the air between them. The blonde knew Santana better than she knew herself. So instead of answering, Britt just looked up waiting for her girlfriend to let whatever was bothering her off her chest. It had to be more than being locked in an old storage closet.

Santana saw Britt's eyes turn towards her and she felt a lump in her throat. "I really thought we were going to solve this case and get out of Ohio together. I wanted to solve this for you. You deserve better than to not graduate. And it makes me so angry that nothing worked out. I really thought we could fix it, Britt."

The dark haired beauty felt the passion and anger she had been pushing down start to rise again. "It's just so stupid that we are stuck like this. Like why? And why would anyone care if you graduated or not! It's so stupid."

She turned away now and kicked at the desk. Her fists balled up as she took a swat at an old lamp. It clattered to the floor; pieces chipped off and the old bulb cracked and broke. If they couldn't yell loud enough, Santana was determined to tear Crawford down from the inside. She picked up a book and threw it at the door then another lamp. But as she raised it, the girl felt fingers wrap around her wrist and still her arm.

Brittany had gotten up from the floor and now stood up against Santana. Their eyes found each other's in the dark and met with such intensity that Santana lost her breath. Breathless, the Latina allowed Brittany to move her arm so that she could place the lamp back down on the desk without causing any more damage.

"Hey…" Those crystal blue eyes caught hold of her and Santana felt her body melt at the soft words spoken.

"Britt, I don't even know how we're going to get out of here. And I can't lose you for another four years or whatever…" Santana whispered finally letting go of her show of bravado and rage. Her shoulders slumped as her body rested comfortably against her girlfriend's. She never liked to admit defeat, but this situation seemed pretty hopeless.

"You're not losing me, San. I'm right here and I know we are going to get out of this mess. We'll just think of a new plan. And don't worry. No matter what, we're going to be together." Brittany whispered back as she leaned forward. Their foreheads touched softly, but their eyes were the central point of contact. In that moment, or really any moment that Santana looked into those eyes, she believed anything Brittany said. "I love you."

Santana finally released the last bit of tension from her body and allowed Britt to completely take her over. "I love you too."

"I always wanted to have 'we're-going-to-die-trapped-in-a-basement-during-a-case-sex'." Brittany said after a few moments just holding each other. She couldn't help herself. They had to take their minds off their predicament anyway.

Santana felt the heat rise in her cheeks at Brittany's brazen words. Now that she relaxed, it was just like her girlfriend to know the exact moment to work her back up again. At least this way was more productive. She couldn't help but smirk. "Oh yeah? What gave you that idea? Because I don't remember Freddy and Daphne getting it on during the cartoons?"

"That's probably because it was Scooby and Shaggy. They are always getting lost for strange amounts of time." Brittany winked. Her hands no longer worked as comfort, but as weapons. Her fingers danced across Santana's back over the blouse's thin material; thin enough that Santana could feel every ounce of pressure from Britt's fingers.

She couldn't help it. Her back arched at the touch. Her breasts jutted forward. Her ass and lower back curled pressing her tits into Brittany's front side. The lip of the table behind her caught the material of her skirt and drew the material up. Rough, old wood scrapped deliciously against her ass over her panties. The sudden change in sensations caused her to lose her breath suddenly.

Never one to let an advantage pass her by, Brittany took the opportunity to fill Santana's mouth with something better than the air. Her mouth leapt at the chance to capture her girlfriend's lips. Her tongue darted between Santana's luscious full lips. A soft moan rippled along their mouths and vibrated down Britt's neck, chest, down her stomach, and then lower into her burning core. The blonde couldn't help herself. Her hips thrust forward and her legs spread. They caught Santana's raised leg and she pushed herself up on the Latina's thighs.

Another muffled moan of appreciation spilled from Santana's lips. Not because of the pleasure her girlfriend was giving her, but because she could literally feel Britt's anticipation and desire. Underneath the tall cheerleader's uniform, her wet panties were already soaked and against her thigh. "Shit, B."

When Brittany turned it on, she turned it on hard. She smirked at Santana's enjoyment. She leaned forward making sure to grasp the underside of Santana's tanned thigh to hike it up Brittany's hip. Both their thighs slammed into each other's centers.

"Lean back all the way, San." Brittany's voice dripped with lustful intention. Santana's body shivered at the power and the way her girlfriend had taken control. Her body compiled. She easily lifted herself onto the table and allowed Brittany to push her back so she now had to lie down. Her legs were spread out and wrapped around the blonde's waist. Strong hands grasped her hips at either side and roughly pulled her entire body back. Santana threw her head back and arched her body as their clothed pussies made contact.

The brunette tried to lift her upper body from the table. But a strong hand on her upper chest forced her back down onto the flat dusty surface of the table. Britt threw her another wink as her fingers lightly paraded down her shirt fingering buttons with that devious look in her sapphire eyes.

Each button made a popping sound…well not so much a sound but a feeling. Santana's body squirmed under Britt's forceful hand and the other hand literally and mentally undressed her. Each button opened another part of the brunette until she was completely undone. Panting beneath her girlfriend, Santana's chest heaved up and down. Only Britt could make her feel not only physically exposed, but emotionally stripped. Breath caught in her throat, she couldn't look away from Britt.

"Fuck."

"Shhh." Britt cooed back. Her fingers traced the valley between Santana's breasts pleased to see a thin sheen of sweat collecting in small droplets on her beautiful tanned skin.

"Fuck, B, you're killing me." Breathless words poured from pursed lips. Her hips lifted from the table so she could find some friction between her legs. The course material of Britt's borrowed Crawford skirt felt so good against the wet lining of her lacy black panties.

"Unhook your bra, San." The brunette on her back immediately complied.

No matter how fast Santana moved to obey her girlfriend's demands, it seemed that Brittany only slowed her own actions. Britt's finger traced along the top of San's breasts collecting the sweat droplets one by one at a frustrating pace. Santana's gyrations against Britt's hips increased now trying to break the dark intoxicating spell being inscribed upon her body with the lines of Britt's fingers.

Down.

Down.

Down. Brittany traced her finger circling the borders of her areola aroused to see nipples hardened by teasing pleasures and the change in temperature. Santana's hip jumped at the added contact.

"Mmm, please, please." Santana moaned. Her eyes lidded. Her tongue licked her bottom lip then bit down.

Even Brittany couldn't resist her own temptations. Her hips grinded down against the ones on the desk table. In one swift powerful motion, Brittany pulled aside the other girl's panties. Two fingers pushed slowly between Santana's legs. A soft hiss escaped from her lips as she felt Brittany push inside. Fire ripped through her whole body as Brittany readjusted their position. She lifted the brunette from the table still stroking in and out of her wet cunt. The other girl could barely function as she felt her girlfriend move in and out of her. But she reached down between them to pull aside Britt's blue duck underwear to push her own fingers into the blonde.

The taller girl's other hand wrapped around San's waist to lift her from the table. The short Latina instantly latched her legs around Brittany forcing their bodies closer and fingers to collide deep into each other's throbbing sexes.

"Fuck!" Santana yelled out. Their mouths closed the distance between pleasure and sound. Tongues darted in and out between muffled grunts of satisfaction and mounting orgasms. The momentum of their bodies pushed Britt back. She alone supported the weight of their fucking as Santana had literally rode her fingers between their bodies bouncing up and down while Britt held her with her free hand. She stumbled backwards taking Santana with her. Luckily a thick plank of wood against the wall stopped Brittany from tumbling backwards. But the blonde didn't notice. She could only feel teeth nipping at the skin on her neck and fingers tangled in her long locks. Santana forcibly pulled her neck to the side to expose even more skin to play with. Luscious lips parted to suck sensitive skin leaving dark marks peppered up and down Brittany's neck.

But that wasn't what was making Brittany's hips buck up as she sought leverage against the plank in her back and the Latina fucking the shit out of her. The wood scraped the back of her legs and shook behind her, but she continued. Finally she flipped their bodies.

Santana gasped at the hard contact of her back on the wood, but she didn't care. The switch made Britt's fingers go deeper into her. Her back arched as she felt her muscles clench down around penetrating digits.

"Britt. Britt. Britt, baby." She mumbled incoherently into golden hair as she buried her face into the crook of her girlfriend's neck. Wave after wave of pleasure throbbed through her body. Her eyes shut tight as they rocked together in the basement dungeon of Crawford. She could distinctly feel Britt's pussy tightening around her own fingers before they both started to breathe again.

Santana could barely suck enough air in to remain conscious. Her whole body felt like it was on fire. Everything was so sensitive. Her skin rippled with electric tremors while her mouth opened trying to gulp in breaths of air. She shared stolen oxygen from her lover's lips unable to move from her position straddling Brittany. Finally, she opened her eyes to see bright azure ones staring back at her. Santana felt like her heart could have burst from the emotions flooding her body.

"I love you…" The brunette whispered meaning every word. But before Brittany could respond -

The room that had held them prisoner began to shake with their final pants. The girls had no time to relish the sensations they had just experienced or to calm down. Their already slowing hearts jumped at a loud crash from across the room. Something must have been jarred loose from their activities. In fact, the whole room groaned as if the counter weight to some ancient trap had been triggered. A clipboard flipped up in the air and arced over their heads.

"That was clos-" Santana began to say.

"Watch out, San!" Britt pushed the half naked girl from her as they both rolled to safety in the middle of the room. The brunette let out a grunt at the impact of her body on the hard floor.

"Ouch." She said looking up just in time to see the wooden planks they had been fucking on had been precariously holding up a section of the ceiling. If Brittany hadn't thrown them a few feet away, they would have been crushed by half the ceiling and the large pieces of wood. "Thanks babe."

They both reached out to help each other off. Brittany's hand patted Santana's ass to remove the large dust bunnies and splinters of wood while the brunette smoothed down the blonde's hair. After they had doctored each other for a few seconds their hearts started to slow.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Britt asked.

"I wouldn't have been. Fuck, I knew we were good, but I didn't know we were good enough to bring an entire building down."

"San, do you feel that?" Their hair was gently swaying around their faces.

"Feels like a draft? It's coming from over where everything fell." Santana stepped over some of the debris towards the pile of wood and plaster that had rained from above. A small grate hung swinging by only a hinge above the mess. Its bars were bent and looked strained to the point of snapping from the weight transfer that must have occurred during the avalanche in the Crawford basement. "Looks like an old ventilation duct or something."

Britt joined her girlfriend standing at the pile of rubble and looked up. "We could definitely fit up through that with the diet coach has us on."

"Damn straight we could, but we have no idea where this leads. Besides there could be rats or something. I don't want any diseases."

"Well you know what Lord Tubbington always says."

Santana held in a groan, but asked anyway. "What does he always say? The early cat gets the tub of cheez whiz?"

"No, silly. LT always says that sex solves everything."

The shorter girl snorted, despite her aversion to all things related to the falsely lorded pussy Brittany insisted knew everything. "So LT and I agree on something. Maybe we will solve this case after all since the sky and the ceiling is falling and Lord Tubbs and I are agreeing. In fact, we might be riding out of Crawford on flying pigs. I still don't know if this is the answer to getting out of here."

"Flying pigs? More like unicorns."

"Unicorns don't fly, but I will ride you out of here, if you want me to." Santana winked. Brittany, who never blushed about anything, felt the heat rise to her cheeks at her girlfriend's brazen remarks. But the heat didn't last. A light breeze brushed against her face.

"If we had LT, we could send him up first."

"First, you'd have to lift his fat ass up there."

"San." Britt shot her girl a disapproving stare.

"What?" Santana shrugged then lied. "I only say stuff about his weight cause I'm concerned about his health."

The blue eyed girl narrowed her stare. Not because she didn't believe Santana, but because she knew her girlfriend. And no matter what Santana said or tried to make herself believe, Britt knew that Santana and LT shared a special relationship. "We'll be fine. Besides, I don't think there's any way out besides the ceiling and I don't want to wait for Crazy Cindy to lock us back up or come back with a chainsaw or something. You know how these things work."

"B, we run an investigating business, not a horror movie crew. No one ever has a chainsaw in crime solving. Guns and like knives, but no chainsaw."

"Fine, but when she comes with a chainsaw-" Brittany's sentence was cut off prematurely by Santana's lips. The girl stopped talking as she relaxed into a soft, but sweet kiss. When San finally pulled back, Britt had completely forgotten why she had been worried to be begin with. They both started to redress themselves. As much as Brittany enjoyed seeing Santana unbuttoned, it did seem smarter to be fully dressed and clothed when gallivanting all over the school through the ceiling.

"Give me a boost." Santana said as the two girls automatically fell into position. Years and years of Sue Sylvester meant they could scale just about anything as a team. Nimbly, Britt lifted Santana up so the other girl could grab a hold of the metal ledge to pull herself up into the duct.

It was full of cobwebs and dust. Santana tried to hold her breath. Disgusting.

"San, give me a hand up!"

"I got you." Santana leaned over and reached down. Easily, the smaller cheerleader pulled the blonde up to the ventilation duct. Once they were both safely inside, Santana flicked open her phone to shed some light into the area. It seemed sturdy enough. But she was still unconvinced this was the best idea. "What now? This could be a dead end for all we know."

"Like being stuck in the basement isn't a dead end?" Britt raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow towards her girl.

"Fine. Whatever. You lead because I'm sure as hell not running into any spiders."

"You don't run into spiders, San. They land on you quietly. Everyone knows that!" Brittany shouted back with an amused laugh as she started to crawl down the duct in darkness.

"At least I'll have something to look at." Santana whispered under her breath before she reached out and flicked up the back of Brittany's skirt. The blonde yelped swatting at the air behind them.

Santana had a feeling they were going to get lost and end up in Narnia. Yup. It was going to be one of those nights.

Good thing she was following a unicorn.

* * *

><p>"B, I love you, but this vent looks exactly the same as the last one we turned into!" Santana whined from behind her girlfriend's posterior. "Can't we just knock the vent and see where we end up? I'm sure we can jump to the floor from the vents. They aren't that high up. Obviously we're out of the IT room so wherever we end up is automatically an improvement."<p>

"Yea, but what if we are in a vent above like an auditorium or something? I haven't learned how to fly yet."

"But you're a unicorn. I know we'll be fine if we just get out of the fucking vents, love." Santana said through gritted teeth. It was taking everything she had not to knock out the vent ducts and jump. She was covered in webs, dust, and dirt. They had been crawling for what felt like hours. Not only were they hopelessly lost, but it felt like they were going in circles. And for some reason they couldn't see anything outside of the narrow passageways.

To top it all off, whenever they were in situations like this, it always resulted in some steamy hot sex. But had that happened yet?

No.

And Santana did not want to get it on in the ducts. The amount showers she was planning to take after – if they ever—escaped was an already daunting and climbing number.

"San, I know you missed my lecture on the differences between pegasi and unicorns, but I mean how many times do I have to tell you. I can't fly. That's not my power. Maybe next time I am Dr. Thomas, I bring you as my pussy holding sidekick instead of Tim."

"I'd prefer that…" Santana grumbled as she pushed aside more webs. "Come on, B. Let's kick this shit out and at least see if we are still in the state of Ohio."

"San!" Britt started to scold her girl again.

A strange noise echoed throughout the vent system.

"Shhh!" Santana tugged on Britt's skirt to stop the girl from proceeding any further. "What is that?"

Britt froze up ahead and squinted into the distance. Their cellphones had been dead for awhile now so they didn't have any light to judge where they were going or what was ahead. It had been fine, until now. Again the noise echoed throughout the duct. Chills ran up and down her body. It was such a strange sound sparkling and clawing around the metal passage followed by thunking on the sides, the top, and the bottom of the ventilation duct. Whatever was coming towards them was definitely big.

"B, maybe we should kick the vent out and take our chances wherever we end up." Santana tugged on Brittany's skirt harder this time, but she didn't budge. "Come on, baby. I don't want to meet whatever's living up here."

Brittany remained as still as a statue. Santana had never seen her girlfriend freeze up over anything. In fact, Britt had always been the one to lunge headfirst towards any danger or anything really. She tugged harder. "Please, babe. Let's go."

"Wait…" Britt breathed trying hard not to be loud.

Sparks exploded at the end of the passageway brilliantly lighting the duct for a second. Both girls covered their eyes quickly. Their eyes had grown accustomed to the darkness they had been crawling in.

"Britt Britt, grab my hand!" Santana yelled. The tunnel lit again sending a shower of sparks through the metal shaft again.

"I told you!" Brittany yelled back grabbing Santana's hand. "Chainsaws!"

"Run!"

Santana turned keeping a tight grip on her girlfriend's hand as she tried to back down from the way they had come. Light flashed all around them. For the first time, Santana thought she could actually see in the darkness. Something caught her eyes up ahead. If only they could reach it. But she only made it a step forward. Pressure followed by a large amount of weight toppled onto her back from behind.

"Oof."

"San, are you okay?"

"What's going on here! And who are you people!" Another voice added to the confusion. An older man's face. A familiar voice.

Santana grunted pushing Britt off her while the blonde worked at getting the other body out of the pile. Again the tunnel sparked up in light. It illuminated the mess of bodies; most importantly, it showed the girls a face in the darkness.

"Tony? Andy? Whatever your name is?" Santana asked now even more confused as she remembered the security man who had let them into Crawford. They had a special connection … well that was what Tim had called it. Really the two exchanged some head nods between each other.

"TANDY!" Britt called out excited that it wasn't a man with a chainsaw coming to kill them. San could barely contain her smirk at the nickname Britt had given the security guard. It was better than always calling him two names.

"The name is Tony."

"Whatever. You're Tandy now. It makes my girl happy." Santana turned her body around so she could face the dark body in the tunnel. "Now explain what you're doing here."

"I'm sorry, but do I know you?" The man's voice came out of the dark again. This time he sounded angry and suspicious. Which made sense considering the circumstances.

"Of course you know us, Tandy."

The light flickered again sparking out. Santana sucked in her breath. No wonder the noise had been so strange and the light sporadic. Tandy was lighting up a taser in the middle of the ventilation duct.

"Dr. Thomas?" Tandy asked incredulously. "Dr. Thomas, what are you doing in that outfit? And what are you doing up here?"

Brittany looked down at the skirt and the button-up. Shrugging, the girl smirked. "Research?"

"Research never looked this hot, baby." Santana couldn't help herself.

"Aren't you the driver? Oh Jeez, please tell me you guys aren't like lady ninja assassins or something. That would just be my luck. Of course I would lose my one sweet love to a chick that looks like The Bride."

"Wha?" Santana tilted her head now even more confused as the older man hung his head in defeat. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Oh don't play. My heart has already been tangled up and mangled enough for the day. Don't think I didn't see you and the dean with your cheesy seduction tactics!" He glared now at Brittany pointing the unlit taser in her direction.

"Hey! I'm not cheesy! If anything, I am a smooth operator. So I don't know what you're talking about." Britt shot back.

"No! No! Literally! That cheese stunt you pulled with the cat could have only been pulled off by a master of seduction and now you're in the vents right above her office probably stealing into her quarters like the master ninja you are to woo her more and have sex with her!" Tandy shook the taser at Britt even harder while his other hand brushed at his cheeks.

"Are you crying?" Santana asked venom dripping in her voice. She couldn't believe this guy. And he was threatening her girlfriend with that fucking electric thing. "Suck it up, asshole. You said something about the dean's office?"

"San, leave Tandy alone. He's hurting. I didn't seduce your lady love, the dean. In fact, I am just trying to talk to her. You see, I think she can help me and then we can leave and never come back to Crawford again."

"You mean that you would _never_ come back to the school again? No more cheese/cat massages in the dean's office?"

Brittany nodded kindly. "We just need some help and then we can be out of here forever and you can tell the dean how you really feel about her."

"Once again… you mentioned the dean's office?" Santana interrupted the little love fest going on. She could gag.

"Well as long as you promise, I can show you where we are." Tandy said with trepidation.

"Okay, but first," Santana held a hand in the air. "Why the fuck do you have a taser in your hand? You're not planning on zapping us, are you?"

"Oh this?" Tandy set it to spark in the air again.

"It's like a sparkler…" Britt went to touch it, but Santana gently took her hand.

"My flashlight batteries died so I only had this left. I wasn't expecting anyone else to be up here." Tandy sparked it again before he started to crawl over both girls towards the small sliver of light that had caught Santana's eyes when they had thought a chainsaw was behind them. He pushed very gently on a small grate on the side of the duct. It let in a whole lot of light.

After their eyes adjusted, both girls peered through the opening.

"Hey, that's the dean's office!" Britt whispered excitedly.

"Yeah and there's that Cindy bitch who locked us in that room." Santana practically growled.

"And Jenny!" Brittany pointed through the small opening.

Down below, three figures were arguing quite heatedly exchanging words with the dean. But their body language indicated that they knew each other. Cindy walked around the room touching anything she wanted while Jenny purposely was pointing at both Cindy and the dean.

"Cindy?" Tandy asked now even more confused. "I thought that was your name, Dr. Thomas. Dr. Cindy Thomas…"

Both girls blushed, but the man continued. "That's not Cindy. In fact, that's Dean Armanda as you should know and Jenny." He pointed to the girl wearing a t-shirt with the school mascot of McKinley, the titan, but they knew her as the vice president of the student council. "And that's Jenny too."

He pointed to the girl that had called herself Cindy before leading them into a trap.

"What?" Santana's head shot up in surprise so fast she hit it on the top of the duct. "What? She told us her name was Cindy!"

"And you told me that you were Dr. Thomas, but I am starting to have my doubts…" The man responded back as he flicked the taser for a second so they could make suspicious eye-contact like in the movies.

"And I said that your name was Tandy!" Brittany jumped into the conversation. "So now we all have fake names. Perfect!"

"Wait…" Santana thought back to the room they had unlocked with two schedules for Crawford and McKinley. It would be impossible for Jenny to attend two schools at once, but it would be easy for two Jennys to go to different schools. But how did they connect? "So you're telling me they are both called Jenny? Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure! I've been a guard here for the past twenty years. Not only that, I have been watching the dean personally for all those years too. So I would know what her niece looks like."

"Her niece?" Britt looked down. "Which one? The one that goes to Crawford or the one that goes to McKinley?"

"Oh the one that goes to Crawford of course. But the other Jenny used to go here too! I am pretty sure they are dating each other because the girls call them JenJen. Or something like that."

"Are you fucking kidding me? Why the fuck would they go after my girl then?" Santana growled. "We are joining their little party right now! You ready, B?"

"Ready to fly out of this vent." Britt gave her girl a wink and steeled herself. "You coming, Tandy?"

"Oh gosh! I couldn't. The dean would kill me if she knew I spy on her sometimes through the vents. Besides this seems like a matter between all of you. I'll just be getting back to my post."

"Whatevs." Santana shrugged. All it took was a sudden kick from the petite cheerleader to bust the grating out from the vent. She didn't hesitate as she nimbly leapt from the vent system above the office. Her landing was smooth and graceful. Her eyes were fixed on Cindy/Jenny but then shifted to glare at the McKinley Jenny.

"What the!" The dean screamed as the grate popped from the ceiling and landed with a loud clatter on the carpet. What scared her the most was the appearance of a girl jumping from the vent followed by another one. They were dressed like Crawford girls, but the dean had never seen them before- "Dr. Thomas?"

"Brittany?" Jenny from McKinley asked. She pulled at her braid nervously and unsure what to do. Santana stepped into her path.

"Jenny One and Jenny Two." Santana growled pointing at them both.

"Wait! I can explain!" Jenny/Cindy called out, but not towards the intruders. Her plea was directed towards the other Jenny. "I was going to tell you about them! I promise! I just needed a little bit more time to figure out my plan! I didn't think they would show up here!"

Jenny/McKinley swung around now fuming towards Jenny/Crawford. "You promised me that you had nothing to do with McKinley! Or with my presidency. Or with Brittany! So why are they here! You promised me, Jen!"

Santana's eyes darted back and forth between the two bickering lovers. What was going on? Oh yeah, she was confused now because they had to be the worst mastermind duo of evil villains ever. They had barely acknowledged their badass jump from the ceiling.

"Umm, aren't you two working together to like ruin my life or something?" Brittany finally asked. "Because this isn't how I imagined this conversation going…"

"Dr. Thomas, I don't understand what you are doing here and dressed like that and how you know these girls. Also why, pray tell, did you come out of the duct?"

"I think I can explain." Jenny/McKinley stepped forward. "You're talking to the former student body president of McKinley High School until a few days ago when all her grades and school records mysteriously vanished like she had never attended. I didn't think anything of it at first, but I have been working with Brittany for the past year on executive board and she spends quite a bit of time studying and doing her work … because of her girlfriend, Santana."

"I'm still very confused why a student from McKinley would dress up like an illustrious professor and invade Crawford?"

"I'm confused why you aren't trying to tie us up and feed us to the sharks, Jenny! I trusted you as my vice president!" Brittany said stepping forward.

"That's what I am trying to say, Brittany. I didn't betray you! My girlfriend…Jenny…she…well…"

"Stop! Fine!" Jenny/Cindy stepped forward. "I admit it! I erased all your records! It was child's play. Your school is so archaic with such old programs, it was easy to hack. And because Jen works for McKinley, I stole her keys to the filing room and I took all the physical copies of your files too."

"I knew it had to be you! But why, Jenn? Brittany has nothing to do with us!" Jenny/McKinley turned back to her girlfriend.

"Nothing to do with us! Are you kidding me! She has everything to do with us! It's because of her that we won't be able to attend Cornell with me in the Fall! We had everything perfect! After your parents transferred you out of Crawford, we knew it would be okay because we could apply to the same school and be together. We worked so hard every year! Then this bitch!" Jenny/Crawford pointed at Brittany. "She comes out of nowhere senior year to take the presidency that you had been working for for the past four years!"

"Jenn…" Jenny/McKinley stepped forward. "Just because I didn't get the presidency doesn't mean it was Brittany's fault. We couldn't have expected to both get into the same program."

Brittany thought about the dorm room and the two sets of schedules. It all made sense and seemed so familiar. Santana kept her schedule at school too. In fact, her girlfriend probably knew more about Britt's classes than she did her own.

"We could have if we were able to give them practically the same application and tell them about all the obstacles we made it over together at different schools! They would have never said no to us!"

"You have to give Brittany back her grades. It's not fair to her."

"Jennifer!" The dean finally realized what her niece had done. "I can't believe you! You will return her records at once and I will have to call Principal Figgins to apologize and explain what happened. I'll probably have to expel you now."

"No! You can't! I was going to give them back! I just wanted Jenny to be able to put on her applications that she was the president and then maybe they'd accept her and we could be together. I was going to let them out! I promise! I was." She looked from the dean to Brittany and Santana.

Santana huffed unimpressed, but Brittany sighed.

"I know what it's like to want to be with your girlfriend no matter what. I still don't even know what I am doing next year after I graduate, but I know it will be with Santana." Brittany smiled casting a quick glance to the girl standing next to her. "I do know that Jenny has been the best vice president I could have asked for. For these last few weeks of the year, I don't need to be the president and I don't want anyone else to not graduate. So if you could just return my grades to McKinley, I will gladly let Jenny take over the reins to finish out the year. I just want to make sure when I finish, it will be this year and not four years from now."

"Brittany, you don't have to do this." Jenny/McKinley said softly, but she glanced at her own Jenny.

"Nope, I would never want to split apart two people." Brittany stepped forward and took Santana's hand. The Latina tried her hardest not to look completely whipped, but her heart was pounding at the contact of their hands. No matter what anyone said, Brittany really was the smartest and kindest person. She always knew what to do and what to say.

"Well that's settled then. I will still give Principal Figgins a call to tell him there was a mix up. Jenn will send back your grades and you can all graduate. I will give a quick call to the front gate to see if someone can escort you back to your car." The dean started to make for the phone on her desk.

"Don't bother calling the front desk. I am pretty sure the man you are looking for is closer than you think." Santana smirked as she looked up towards the vent they had jumped from.

"Tandy! Come down!" Britt called up.

A distinct sizzle came from the vent followed by a series of yelps, thuds, and then a grunt came from the vent. The next thing, a very large body rolled out from the vent and landed on the carpet with a thud.

"Oh shit." Santana said under her breath. "I think Tandy must have shocked himself!"

The man lay twitching on the ground with the taser still in his hand.

"Oh my! Officer Tony! Are you okay?" The dean rushed forward brushing back the man's hair from his face trying to see if he was bleeding or hurt.

"We should probably go." Santana said watching the woman nurse the man back to consciousness.

"Yeah, but look at Tandy getting some hardcore loving from the dean right now. We are so good! LT:P-EYE here for all your mysteries, crime solving, and matchmaking in the love." Brittany giggled.

"Yeah, but do you think we should tell Mr. Loverboy over there that he peed himself?"

"Nah. We'll just throw off his game." Brittany laughed as she waved to the Jennys, the dean, and the beaming Tandy, who was just loving all the attention the dean was giving him. He even gave the two girls a thumbs up as they walked out the office doors.

* * *

><p>"Case Closed?" Santana asked softly as they approached her red car.<p>

"Yea, I think so. We found my grades. I get to graduate and we did it together with some help from LT, Tim, and even Tandy."

"So do you think we're done forever then? Our last case?" Santana unlocked the car doors, but lingered on the passenger's side.

"I don't know. Do good things always have to end? Because I love LT:P-EYE and I love being with you." The blonde turned into Santana's body. They were so close now that their lips brushed with every word.

"Good things don't have to end. We'll always be together." Santana whispered softly feeling heat rise in her cheeks at her words. Sometimes she felt so corny, but she meant every word said.

"If we'll be together forever then there will always be mysteries to solve and adventures to get into. Besides, we are finishing high school, I'm sure the adventures only really start now."

"So we'll keep the name? We can always be LT:P-EYE on the side?"

"As long as we're the ones in the middle. Thanks, San, for being the best partner."

"I try."

"I love you." Brittany finally closed the gap between their lips to seal their promises with a kiss.

"I love you too."

They got into the car hand-in-hand and started to make their way back home. Brittany reached over to the consol and turned on her IPod. The Siamese Cat Song thumped through the speakers. Santana groaned, but couldn't help herself as she started to sing the lyrics along with her girlfriend. It would be a long trip back, but she wouldn't have it any other way.

* * *

><p><strong>Oh goodness. I can't believe that was the last chapter and case for LT:P-Eye! I can honestly say I never expected to have written this much for the story, but your comments, reviews, alerts, and adds really encouraged me to keep writing! It's been an absolute pleasure! I would love to hear your thoughts now that it's over! <strong>

**Please any comments, criticism, or anything you want to say – totally welcomed!**

**Thank you! Thank you!**

**Don't forget I will be posting **_**Sirens**_** which is kinda a spin-off of LT:P-EYE and takes places years later. We shall see if their promise to always be together is true and what type of adventures await them in the world after high school. As a teaser (I love teasers ) I will post a few more paragraphs of the first chapter of **_**Sirens!**_** If you're interested please add me to your author alert so you don't miss out. I will also be writing a few one shots during **_**Sirens**_**. **

**Once again, thank you so much and have a lovely week!**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sirens<strong>_

**Chapter 1**

**Teaser Part 2**

"I don't think it's one of your friends, but-"

"What! Did someone get hurt? Shit! Who is it?" Puck flew the few feet that separated him and grabbed his commander by the collar of his shirt and yanked at him. Despite the older man's weight, Puck was able to lift him an inch off the ground in his fury. A few bodies shifted towards them, but didn't touch the two. Puck realized what he had been doing and slowly lowered his boss to the ground. Luckily, Macklin didn't retaliate, but pretended the incident had never happened as he smoothed down his collar.

"Like I said, I don't think it's one of your friends, Noah, but we can be sure of one thing. The Midnight Strangler is back." Macklin shook his head. Then looked off into the distance not wanting to meet Puck's eyes. Even saying the name after all these years sent shivers through the seasoned police chief. Shivers of anger, fear, and shame. He had always hated what the media had dubbed one of the most notorious and disgusting killers he had ever seen. One that had gotten away.

"Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit." Puck walked away from Macklin unable to release his frustration. The only solid object he could find was a parked cop car. He drove his fist into the side panel of the car and yelled. "Fuck!"

Macklin rushed over and pulled him away. "Keep it together, Noah. I can't have you causing a scene here with the media swarming. And I can't have them knowing that this asshole is back. At least, not until we can brief the department and go over the body with the coroner and forensics team to confirm. And for all we know this could be a copy cat since the killer hasn't surfaced in the past four years. I need you to keep your shit together, alright, son?"

His large hand pressed down on Puck's shoulder applying just enough pressure to comfort and yet subtly remind the younger man to keep himself in check. Panting hard and heavy, Puck eventually allowed himself to simmer back down. He could do it. He didn't have to freak out. It would be fine. "Got it, chief."

"Good." Macklin pulled his hand back and stroked his salt and pepper beard for a few moments. The sound of the sirens washed over them. The crowd still murmured, and both men's eyes turned towards the stretcher that held the body.

"You're sure it wasn't anyone I know?" Puck asked finally his heart feeling instantly heavier. So many of his friends had made the trip to New York to live out their big dreams. Last time…

"I had the station run the name. But the girl wasn't from Lima, in fact, she wasn't even from Ohio so I doubt it was one of your friends."

"Thanks. I don't know if I can go through that again…" Puck said softly under his breath not wanting Macklin to hear his admission. All he could remember was the body.

Her body.

Her body and the cold sinking feeling that he would never be okay again. That day had torn his whole world apart, but he tried not to think about it. He couldn't afford to think about how he had failed, how everyone had failed.

"Look, Noah, I know this is going to bring up some bad memories, but I need to you bring her into the station. You are one of her oldest friends so I don't want to send anyone else. Besides you know she's been a reckless cannon since the whole ordeal." Macklin said lighting up a cigarette for himself. He still couldn't look Puckerman in the eye.

"I thought you said she wasn't allowed in the station anymore."

"I know what I said and I had meant it at the time. If it wasn't for this mess she still wouldn't be allowed in the station. I would have had her investigator license revoked if I knew she wasn't capable, but the bitch somehow keeps finding work and until…" He trailed off looking for better words. "…that whole thing happened; she was one of the best. You know her best so she if you can rouse her from her drunken stupor and get her down to the station, I would be grateful. I don't want her finding out about this through the news. She'll be a mess as it is."

"Chief, you know what this case did to her the last time she worked it. I don't know if it's a good idea. I mean she still isn't herself and she's worse now that she's alone." Puck ventured carefully trying not to sound challenging. "Besides we have all the case notes from the last time these sprees started. Maybe it would be best not to bring in anyone else."

"No. We tried to play it cute last time and too many people died. This time I want no mistakes and pussying footing around this shit. I want everyone who ever worked on the case back in my office going over statements, witness accounts, and victimology. I'm even thinking about calling the feds in right away this time. I don't want to give this asshole a chance to getting going like last time." Macklin flicked the cigarette to the ground and finally turned to Puck. "This will _not_ be a repeat of last time. Do you understand me, Puckerman?"

Despite his commander's harsh tone, Puck actually felt reassured at the sound of his last name spoken like a threat. It made him feel like for a half second that this would be a regular case and everything would be alright. Macklin nodded and shook Puck's hand before walking away. Puck repeated the last statement again and again in his head like a mantra.

This will not be a repeat of last time.

This will not be a repeat of last time.

This wouldn't be like last time.

This couldn't be like last time.

Yet the tight ball of feelings knotting in his core caused the man to give into dark thoughts as he slammed the door of his car. What if this would be like last time? What if they couldn't catch this guy again? What if another of his friends died? What if? What if?


End file.
